I can't get on Mumsnet and I'm not a Mum anyway so probably best.

However I have MIL/FIL/BIL and IL (in-law) anxiety issues about xmas.

My MIL and FIL and BIL all think I was born yesterday (in a barn) and I want to play them at their own game but I don't know how. Plus dh seems to have clued up to being the centre-of-all-the-family-politics-attention he's getting for marrying chez moi and by New Year's Day I'm going to need a whole bottle of Vodka (I've got a bottle of JD stashed in a secret location somewhere). Not allowed to touch the last bottle of antique Cuban Rum...but I've had a secret sip and really wonder why it is worth waiting so long.

So that's it...I've decided...I've solved my own problem....down to Terry's on New Year's Day to relieve him of his finest quality Fosters. Maybe test his Cocktail knowledge by asking for a Cosmopoliton or a Virgin Mary (with a raw egg...no fear of samonella here).

It's just I think I should be able to wear what want/dress up for Christmas and he says I can't wear the ball-gown I paid and arm and leg to sing O Happy Day in. With the velvet bow shoes I bought to go with (but couldn't wear because heals make me too tall - so I'd be blocking out rest of choir, who constantly like to keep pinching, pulling and touching me left, right and as it is).

Anyway it's 7.26 GMT (not a G & T as Gorden isn't very popular). So got to survive until end of next week when I will have more time to devise a cunning plan to dig-for-victory and see if the Earth's core really is all hot molton lava, ready to explode into another massive -UP POMPEII erruption after all.

Also want to complain that the FULL version of Carry On Camping is not on YouTube yet...only clippets in Russian!