https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/aug/10/driving-me-nuts-german-police-rescue-man-baby-squirrel?CMP=fb_gu

FullLipsDotNose said:

https://www.theguardian.c...?CMP=fb_gu

Just made the link clickable.

I was walking down the road the other day when a big Cadillac came at me from the opposite direction. It was headed right at me!

I moved left, and so did the Caddy. I moved right, and so did the Caddy. Finally, I desperately dove into a ditch, avoiding death by mere inches.

As the Caddy passed me, I noticed it was driven by a squirrel. He yelled at me, "It's not so fucking easy, is it??

RodeoSchro said:

benni said:

EmmaMcG said:

RodeoSchro said:

I was walking down the road the other day when a big Cadillac came at me from the opposite direction. It was headed right at me!

I moved left, and so did the Caddy. I moved right, and so did the Caddy. Finally, I desperately dove into a ditch, avoiding death by mere inches.

As the Caddy passed me, I noticed it was driven by a squirrel. He yelled at me, "It's not so fucking easy, is it??

Something about this story seems off. Where would a squirrel get the money to buy a Cadillac in this day and age?

He was driving it like he stole it, so maybe he stole it. He probably drives a Chevy Volt or a Prius most of the time.

RodeoSchro said:

This thread reminds me of a Geico commercial...

[Edited 8/11/18 20:51pm]

poor little thing. desperately searhing for a savior connection.... once in a park near downtown minneapolis i was approched by a very aggressive squiirel, used to being fed snacks. he/she actually began climbing up my pants leg as i backed away from him/her. i wan't afraid exactly, but i was glad to be wearing baggy pants that allowed me to sort of gently shake him off me. he looked a little hurt as i sprinted away....

True Story. We have a squirrel that we nicknamed Rocky. (it's not our pet) Rocky decides to sit on our deck rail, then takes a flying leap to land on our sliding glass door screen, hanging onto the screen with all 4 feet, looking in at as and jabbering away.

PennyPurple said:

True Story. We have a squirrel that we nicknamed Rocky. (it's not our pet) Rocky decides to sit on our deck rail, then takes a flying leap to land on our sliding glass door screen, hanging onto the screen with all 4 feet, looking in at as and jabbering away.

My son and fiancee have a red squirrel that shows up on their balconey everyday around 4 p.m. and turns into a peeping tom at their sliding glass door...

purplethunder3121 said:

PennyPurple said:

True Story. We have a squirrel that we nicknamed Rocky. (it's not our pet) Rocky decides to sit on our deck rail, then takes a flying leap to land on our sliding glass door screen, hanging onto the screen with all 4 feet, looking in at as and jabbering away.

My son and fiancee have a red squirrel that shows up on their balconey everyday around 4 p.m. and turns into a peeping tom at their sliding glass door...

Squirrels are so fun. I love to watch them.

PennyPurple said:

purplethunder3121 said:

My son and fiancee have a red squirrel that shows up on their balconey everyday around 4 p.m. and turns into a peeping tom at their sliding glass door...

Squirrels are so fun. I love to watch them.

i do too! sometimes i wonder if wild animals would like to be 'domesticated' and friendly with humans the way dogs, cats and some birds are. among others i think raccoons would like to hang with people

XxAxX said:

PennyPurple said:

Squirrels are so fun. I love to watch them.

i do too! sometimes i wonder if wild animals would like to be 'domesticated' and friendly with humans the way dogs, cats and some birds are. among others i think raccoons would like to hang with people

prob being that raccoons' nails are pretty much GOUGING machines... dang.. I mean... damn... that would hurt like a mf.

https://www.youtube.com/w...ziwbQv9zQ0

U with squirrels, Morty . Made me think of this .

2045RadicalMattZ said:

XxAxX said:

i do too! sometimes i wonder if wild animals would like to be 'domesticated' and friendly with humans the way dogs, cats and some birds are. among others i think raccoons would like to hang with people

prob being that raccoons' nails are pretty much GOUGING machines... dang.. I mean... damn... that would hurt like a mf.

Raccoons are mean, they have no problem attacking us or our pets.

I love raccoons!!

FullLipsDotNose said:

You don't want to mess with raccoons...

purplethunder3121 said:

You don't want to mess with raccoons...

Exactly. They'll tear you up in nothin flat.

and yet it's been done...

. . .and with wolves. . . it's just a matter of trying and overcoming stupid human superstitions

not to mention crows. humans are fairly ignorant about animal intelligence. until recently, it was assumed by scientists that birds had 'read only' memory. in other words they did not learn, but were hatched into the world with genetic memory and instinct. now we know better. unfortunately animals like black cats, crows and wolves are reviled in human thinking, having been tied to 'devil' in folklore and literature.

[Edited 8/13/18 17:55pm]

FullLipsDotNose said:

I love raccoons!!

me too!

PennyPurple said:

2045RadicalMattZ said:

prob being that raccoons' nails are pretty much GOUGING machines... dang.. I mean... damn... that would hurt like a mf.

Raccoons are mean, they have no problem attacking us or our pets.

yeah. and humans aren't mean??

we seem to have no problem with running them over on the roadways. treating them like sh1t by not even taking the time to slow down on the road when we encounter them, heartlessly not caring if they are injured and leaving them to die slow deaths on the side of the road. i can't think of anything meaner than that

[Edited 8/13/18 18:04pm]

purplethunder3121 said:

You don't want to mess with raccoons...

you don't want to mess with any wild creature. all of them are intelligent to one degree or another. it's only humans that are as viciously and savagely cruel to one another and to the cool lifeforms all around us.

this planet should be a garden of eden. but thanks to humans' fucky ignorance, we are factory farming them, abandoning them when it serves our needs to do so, squishing them on roads, extincting them at an amazing rate. imo humans' relationship with the natural world is a horrible tragedy. we look to space and wonder - where is other intelligent life? heck, it is all around us here on earth.

I dislike crows rather intensly.

Ready for another true story?

My grandparents lived in rural mid Missouri. They had a pet crow, they found it as a baby and raised it, This crow stole everything and kept the stolen items on the roof. They also taught the crow how to smoke cigs, and how to drink whiskey. Yes the crow would sit there like it was a member of the family and smoke and drink.

Anyways, when us grandkids were down visiting and were outside playing, the crow would swoop down on us and attack us and peck holes in our head, but of course when Grandma was around the crow would act all nice and gentle. The crow would sit on grandma's shoulder and peck at us because we were sitting next to her, we promptly told on the crow seeing as grandma was right there to see it, but of course she said the crow would never hurt one of her grandkids, so I said, then why is my head bleeding? LOL Everytime grandma would look away the crow would peck us, we'd scream she'd look our way and the crow was as nice as can be. I'm telling you that crow hunted us down.

PS: As I'm re-reading this, you all probably think I'm nuts, but it is true.

My grandparents came to KC to visit 1 weekend and when they got back home, the crow was gone. We always thought maybe it was following their car and got hit by another car....we hoped at least.

if you come across a baby animal or an inured animal in need of compassion and care please do not turn away. many cities and towns have wildlife rehabilitation centers. carry a blanket or box in your car and if you see an injured animal by the roadside, scoop them up and bring them to a rehabilitation center. if the animal is too big to handle yourself or if you are frightened (bears, eagles, wolves, etc.) google then call the nearest wildlife rescue hotline and tell them about the injured animal.

XxAxX said:

PennyPurple said:

Raccoons are mean, they have no problem attacking us or our pets.

yeah. and humans aren't mean??

we seem to have no problem with running them over on the roadways. treating them like sh1t by not even taking the time to slow down on the road when we encounter them, heartlessly not caring if they are injured and leaving them to die slow deaths on the side of the road. i can't think of anything meaner than that

[Edited 8/13/18 18:04pm]

Ewww, not me, I don't kill living things, unless it's a spider. I don't run over things either. I'd much rather take the ditch then to hit a creature.