A married couple rushed to the hospital

because the woman was in labor the doctor asked the couple,

"I have invented a new machine that you might want to try,

it takes some of the labor pains away from the mother and

gives it to the father."
So the married couple decided that they would try this.

The doctor hooked the machine up and put it on 10% of pain

switched from the mother to the father and the husband said

"I feel okay turn it up a lot more."
So the doctor turned it up to 50% and the husband said

"Why don't you just put it all on me cause I'm not feeling a thing."
The doctor warned them,

"This much could kill you if you're not prepared,"

and the husband replied "I'm ready."
So the doctor turned the machine up to 100%

but the husband didn't feel a thing so

they went home happy with a pain free labor.
When they got home

the mailman was dead on the front porch!

BADD!!!

_________________________________________________________________________________

After 35 years, mailman George decides to retire. On his last day, he makes his usual rounds.

When he arrives at the first house, the whole family comes out, congratulates him, and sends him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.

At the second house, they present him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house hand him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the next house, he is met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She takes him by the hand and leads him up to the bedroom, where she blows his mind with the most passionate sex he has ever experienced.

When done, they go downstairs, where she fixes him a giant breakfast. As she pours him a cup of coffee, he notices a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this is just too wonderful for words," he says, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she says, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that I wanted to do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Screw him. Give him a dollar.' But breakfast was my idea."

purplethunder3121 said:

_________________________________________________________________________________

After 35 years, mailman George decides to retire. On his last day, he makes his usual rounds.

When he arrives at the first house, the whole family comes out, congratulates him, and sends him on his way with a tidy gift envelope.

At the second house, they present him with a box of fine cigars. The folks at the third house hand him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

At the next house, he is met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She takes him by the hand and leads him up to the bedroom, where she blows his mind with the most passionate sex he has ever experienced.

When done, they go downstairs, where she fixes him a giant breakfast. As she pours him a cup of coffee, he notices a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this is just too wonderful for words," he says, "but what's the dollar for?"

"Well," she says, "last night, I told my husband that today would be your last day and that I wanted to do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Screw him. Give him a dollar.' But breakfast was my idea."

STOP!!!

happy friday!

funkpill said:

funkpill said:

STOP!!!

FUNKPILL!!!!

nobody does friday like you

do we get one just cause???

KingBAD said:

funkpill said:

STOP!!!

FUNKPILL!!!!

nobody does friday like you

do we get one just cause???

Man Asked Woman, "Will You Marry Me And Be The Mother Of My Children?"

Woman said, " How many children do you have?"

funkpill said:

KingBAD said:

FUNKPILL!!!!

nobody does friday like you

do we get one just cause???

Man Asked Woman, "Will You Marry Me And Be The Mother Of My Children?"

Woman said, " How many children do you have?"

funkpill said:

KingBAD said:

FUNKPILL!!!!

nobody does friday like you

do we get one just cause???

Man Asked Woman, "Will You Marry Me And Be The Mother Of My Children?"

Woman said, " How many children do you have?"