"See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum...

and one night, one night they decide they don't like living

in an asylum any more. They decide they're going to escape!

So, they get up onto the roof and there,

just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town,

stretching away in the moonlight...stretching away to freedom.

Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem.

But his friend, his friend daren't make the leap. Y'see...y'see,

he's afraid of falling. So then, the first guy has an idea...

He says 'Hey! I have my flashlight with me!

I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings.

You can walk along the beam and join me!'

But the second guy just shakes his head.

He says... he says 'What do you think I am? Crazy?

You'd turn it off when I was half way across!'"

KingBAD said:

Here's the cow joke I alluded to:

Three bulls were the servicers for a herd of 100 cows. The oldest bull got 50 of the cows; the middle bull got 35; and the youngest bull was lucky to have 15 of his own. Then one day the rancher drove up with another bull in the cattle trailer.

"No way am I sharing any of MY cows with the new guy!" said the first bull. "Me neither!" said the middle bull. "And I worked too hard for my few cows to share any of them!" exclaimed the youngest bull.

Just then the rancher opened the trailer and out stepped the biggest, meanest bull anyone had ever seen! He was as big as all three of the other bulls put together. He was a Longhorn with horns that must have measured 15 feet tip-to-tip! He was shaking his head and snot was flying out of his nose!

"Well," said the first bull, with obvious fear in his voice, "I think I can spare 15 or 20 cows for THAT guy".

The middle bull stammered, "Y...y...yes, I can let him have 10 or 15 of mmmmm......mine".

They looked in surprise at the youngest, smallest bull, who was stamping his hooves, throwing his head, and looking as mean as he could. "What the hell are you doing?!?!" asked the oldest bull.

"I'm making damn sure he knows I'm a bull and not a cow!" said the youngest bull!




Now see? Great joke, except if you screw it up like I did and tell it to a bunch of cattlemen where the bulls are castrated steers!

BADD!!!

all hail KingBAD

RodeoSchro said:

Here's the cow joke I alluded to:

Three bulls were the servicers for a herd of 100 cows. The oldest bull got 50 of the cows; the middle bull got 35; and the youngest bull was lucky to have 15 of his own. Then one day the rancher drove up with another bull in the cattle trailer.

"No way am I sharing any of MY cows with the new guy!" said the first bull. "Me neither!" said the middle bull. "And I worked too hard for my few cows to share any of them!" exclaimed the youngest bull.

Just then the rancher opened the trailer and out stepped the biggest, meanest bull anyone had ever seen! He was as big as all three of the other bulls put together. He was a Longhorn with horns that must have measured 15 feet tip-to-tip! He was shaking his head and snot was flying out of his nose!

"Well," said the first bull, with obvious fear in his voice, "I think I can spare 15 or 20 cows for THAT guy".

The middle bull stammered, "Y...y...yes, I can let him have 10 or 15 of mmmmm......mine".

They looked in surprise at the youngest, smallest bull, who was stamping his hooves, throwing his head, and looking as mean as he could. "What the hell are you doing?!?!" asked the oldest bull.

"I'm making damn sure he knows I'm a bull and not a cow!" said the youngest bull!




Now see? Great joke, except if you screw it up like I did and tell it to a bunch of cattlemen where the bulls are castrated steers!

you shoulda went solo with this one

folks that can't stand me gonna miss out....

KingBAD said:

TRUECRISTIAN said:

KingBAD said:

you shoulda went solo with this one

folks that can't stand me gonna miss out....

I can't believe you would post something like this! Do you have any idea how offensive this joke is to Christians? You should be ashamed.

daaaaaaaaaaaaaamn... you are goooooooooooooooooooooooood...

and you did that with prolly no effort what so ever...

give us another...

How about the King Bad podcast?

2freaky4church1 said:

How about the King Bad podcast?

I can appreciate a good joke as much as any other guy. But there’s a difference between making a joke and insulting other people. When you begin to bring in specific religious practice or condemnations for not doing as the religion "requires," that becomes an insult.

KingBAD said:

TRUECRISTIAN said:

2freaky4church1 said:

How about the King Bad podcast?

I can appreciate a good joke as much as any other guy. But there’s a difference between making a joke and insulting other people. When you begin to bring in specific religious practice or condemnations for not doing as the religion "requires," that becomes an insult.

yo THIS AIN'T P&R

fukkk religion as a whole

fukkk religion in every part of it generally

and fukkk yo relion specifically

and anything you got to think about me

and what ever the fukkk i say...

take that shit to "prince.org site discussion"

i don't give a shit about yo taste in humor either...

you're welcome

KingBAD said:

EmmaMcG said:

KingBAD said:

yo THIS AIN'T P&R

fukkk religion as a whole

fukkk religion in every part of it generally

and fukkk yo relion specifically

and anything you got to think about me

and what ever the fukkk i say...

take that shit to "prince.org site discussion"

i don't give a shit about yo taste in humor either...

you're welcome

Brilliant!

"i'm gonna make you love me..."

EmmaMcG said:

KingBAD said:

"See, there were these two guys in a lunatic asylum...

and one night, one night they decide they don't like living

in an asylum any more. They decide they're going to escape!

So, they get up onto the roof and there,

just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town,

stretching away in the moonlight...stretching away to freedom.

Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem.

But his friend, his friend daren't make the leap. Y'see...y'see,

he's afraid of falling. So then, the first guy has an idea...

He says 'Hey! I have my flashlight with me!

I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings.

You can walk along the beam and join me!'

But the second guy just shakes his head.

He says... he says 'What do you think I am? Crazy?

You'd turn it off when I was half way across!'"

This was the joke that made Batman laugh when Joker told it in The Killing Joke animated movie.

yes...

if the joker can't make em laff....

KingBAD said:

EmmaMcG said:

KingBAD said: Brilliant!

"i'm gonna make you love me..."

TU IN COMPENDIO FATUUS VA Eurus JUMENTUM

FOR YOU KING

[Edited 1/30/17 17:05pm]

[Edited 1/30/17 17:06pm]

TRUECRISTIAN said:

KingBAD said:

"i'm gonna make you love me..."

TU IN COMPENDIO FATUUS VA Eurus JUMENTUM

e una figa dritto, se si pensa che si può dire 
un po 'di merda non posso rispondere, 
ma pensi che io sia stupido ... 
kinda perdere su tutti i fronti ... 
prova più difficile ...
toot de mundo...
                       

inappropriate. a true christian would leave the thread instead of proudly flaunting his/her faith then starting and waging a personal war. i don't believe your faith is strong like that

TRUECRISTIAN said:

FOR YOU KING

[Edited 1/30/17 17:05pm]

[Edited 1/30/17 17:06pm]

XxAxX said:

inappropriate. a true christian would leave the thread instead of proudly flaunting his/her faith then starting and waging a personal war. i don't believe your faith is strong like that

TRUECRISTIAN said:

i didn't know they had a code BUT

please don't chase it away... it was

usin another language which shows

it has the capacity to adapt and i was

gonna give it so much more to adapt to...

plus i like tryin to figure out what two

year olds think 'cussin one out' is...

the best i've got so far is "spit do do head"

and where it may be a hellacious thing

to a two year old, i just find it funny...

KingBAD said:

XxAxX said:

inappropriate. a true christian would leave the thread instead of proudly flaunting his/her faith then starting and waging a personal war. i don't believe your faith is strong like that

i didn't know they had a code BUT

please don't chase it away... it was

usin another language which shows

it has the capacity to adapt and i was

gonna give it so much more to adapt to...

plus i like tryin to figure out what two

year olds think 'cussin one out' is...

the best i've got so far is "spit do do head"

and where it may be a hellacious thing

to a two year old, i just find it funny...

sorry dear. didn't mean to ruin your fun.

XxAxX said:

KingBAD said:

i didn't know they had a code BUT

please don't chase it away... it was

usin another language which shows

it has the capacity to adapt and i was

gonna give it so much more to adapt to...

plus i like tryin to figure out what two

year olds think 'cussin one out' is...

the best i've got so far is "spit do do head"

and where it may be a hellacious thing

to a two year old, i just find it funny...

sorry dear. didn't mean to ruin your fun.

Capitis minutio est status permutatio -Navegare necesse est, vivere non est necesse

that was just sad...

i'm incarnate and my rule

is uncontested by time, dominion,

or dimension... you funny...

domini domini domini, we all cathlic now....