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Thread started 04/06/03 3:20pm

Mizzunderstood

15 reasons why cucumbers are better then men

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:24:35 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]
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Reply #1 posted 04/06/03 3:22pm

JaneyPoos

avatar

Mizzunderstood said:

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:22:00 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]


lol thats bloody fantastic lol roflmao
JaneyPoos used to be it... then they changed what it was. Now what I am isn't it and what is it is strange and frightening to me...


I survived the Org Depression Spring 2003
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Reply #2 posted 04/06/03 3:25pm

BattierBeMyDad
dy

avatar

You forgot the part about being able to eat the cucumber when you're done.

Of course, you could eat a man... confuse
-------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti...
"I've just had an apostrophe!"
"I think you mean an epiphany..."
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Reply #3 posted 04/06/03 3:26pm

divo02

avatar

Cucumbers don't have a pulse though.
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Reply #4 posted 04/06/03 3:28pm

Mizzunderstood

BattierBeMyDaddy said:

You forgot the part about being able to eat the cucumber when you're done.

Of course, you could eat a man... confuse

Of course you can burger
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Reply #5 posted 04/06/03 3:28pm

BattierBeMyDad
dy

avatar

divo02 said:

Cucumbers don't have a pulse though.


Neither do the men I like.
-------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti...
"I've just had an apostrophe!"
"I think you mean an epiphany..."
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Reply #6 posted 04/06/03 3:28pm

Supernova

avatar

Too many cons, not enough pros...
This post not for the wimp contingent. All whiny wusses avert your eyes.
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Reply #7 posted 04/06/03 3:34pm

Paisley

I disagree, give me a man anyday! nod
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:37:40 PDT 2003 by Paisley]
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Reply #8 posted 04/06/03 3:36pm

Christopher

avatar

Paisley said:

I disagree, give me a man anyday! :nod;



i knew you'd be on this thread like whores on cereal!

hi paisley lol
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Reply #9 posted 04/06/03 3:38pm

Paisley

Christopher said:

Paisley said:

I disagree, give me a man anyday! :nod;



i knew you'd be on this thread like whores on cereal!

hi paisley lol

Stop callin me a whore. sad
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Reply #10 posted 04/06/03 3:38pm

luv4thepurple1

avatar

lol

I use to have a keychain

that was similiar to this.
He calls me "Holi" cuz he says everyday w/ me is like a Holiday...
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Reply #11 posted 04/06/03 3:39pm

JaneyPoos

avatar

Paisley said:

I disagree, give me a man anyday! nod
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:37:40 PDT 2003 by Paisley]


agreed but this thread is bloody funny lol
JaneyPoos used to be it... then they changed what it was. Now what I am isn't it and what is it is strange and frightening to me...


I survived the Org Depression Spring 2003
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Reply #12 posted 04/06/03 3:39pm

Christopher

avatar

Paisley said:

Christopher said:

Paisley said:

I disagree, give me a man anyday! :nod;



i knew you'd be on this thread like whores on cereal!

hi paisley lol

Stop callin me a whore. sad



since when did i call you a whore?...i would never hug
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Reply #13 posted 04/06/03 3:40pm

Paisley

Christopher said:

Paisley said:

Christopher said:

Paisley said:

I disagree, give me a man anyday! :nod;



i knew you'd be on this thread like whores on cereal!

hi paisley lol

Stop callin me a whore. sad



since when did i call you a whore?...i would never hug

OK, just makin sure.
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Reply #14 posted 04/06/03 3:42pm

DigitalLisa

cucumbers don't have stds either neutral
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Reply #15 posted 04/06/03 3:42pm

divo02

avatar

BattierBeMyDaddy said:

divo02 said:

Cucumbers don't have a pulse though.


Neither do the men I like.


is this what's bothering you?
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Reply #16 posted 04/06/03 3:42pm

Aannastesia

...if I could only teach
a cucumber to restrain me...
... eek ...
heart life heart Sexy heart u all
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Reply #17 posted 04/06/03 3:43pm

Paisley

Mizzunderstood said:

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:24:35 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]

Hey Lisa, maybe you should stick to cucumbers for a while. wink
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Reply #18 posted 04/06/03 3:44pm

DigitalLisa

Paisley said:

Mizzunderstood said:

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:24:35 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]

Hey Lisa, maybe you should stick to cucumbers for a while. wink

And I don't have to clean up the mess afterwards razz
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Reply #19 posted 04/06/03 3:44pm

Paisley

DigitalLisa said:

Paisley said:

Mizzunderstood said:

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:24:35 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]

Hey Lisa, maybe you should stick to cucumbers for a while. wink

And I don't have to clean up the mess afterwards razz

Your sick! disbelief :LOL:
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Reply #20 posted 04/06/03 3:56pm

DigitalLisa

Now that's what I'm talking about drool

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Reply #21 posted 04/06/03 4:11pm

mcmeekle

16. A cucumber wont wipe itself on the curtains after sex.
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Reply #22 posted 04/06/03 4:17pm

BattierBeMyDad
dy

avatar

divo02 said:

BattierBeMyDaddy said:

divo02 said:

Cucumbers don't have a pulse though.


Neither do the men I like.


is this what's bothering you?


Sort of.
-------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti...
"I've just had an apostrophe!"
"I think you mean an epiphany..."
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #23 posted 04/06/03 5:21pm

JimmyNothing

avatar

Mizzunderstood said:

Top 15 reasons Cucumbers are better than men
(as told by digitalLisa)

a cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety

cucumbers never need a round of applause

the average cucumber is at least seven inches long

cucumbers stay hard for a week

it's easy to drop a cucumber

cucumbers won't ask:
Am I the best?
How was it?
Did you come? How many times?

Afterwards, a cucumber won't:
want to shake hands and be friends
say, "I'll call you a cab."
tell you he's not the marrying kind
tell you he is the marrying kind
call his mother, ex-wife, or therapist
take you to confesion

a cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt

you always know where YOUR cucumber has been

cucumbers never have a mid-life crisis

cucumbers don't care if you make more money than they do

cucumbers never expect you to have little cucumbers

and if you do, a cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."

cucumbers won't ask about your last lover or speculate about your next one

a cucumber will never leave you
for another woman
for another man
for another cucumber
[This message was edited Sun Apr 6 15:24:35 PDT 2003 by Mizzunderstood]


[cough]penis envy[/cough] wink
Put yourself on the worldwide org map! www.frappr.com/princeorg
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Reply #24 posted 04/06/03 5:23pm

SuperC

Yeah, get a cucumber to by you a drink or dinner?
Get a cucumber to chase away a burgler or open a jar?
Get a cucumber to listen to you while you bitch and moan?
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Reply #25 posted 04/06/03 5:25pm

JimmyNothing

avatar

SuperC said:

Yeah, get a cucumber to by you a drink or dinner?
Get a cucumber to chase away a burgler or open a jar?
Get a cucumber to listen to you while you bitch and moan?


Well said C! woot!

Get a cucumber to get things down from the top shelf for ya!
Put yourself on the worldwide org map! www.frappr.com/princeorg
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Reply #26 posted 04/06/03 5:25pm

Muse2noPharaoh

Aannastesia said:

...if I could only teach
a cucumber to restrain me...
... eek ...


lol
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Reply #27 posted 04/06/03 6:05pm

Handclapsfinga
snapz

SuperC said:

Yeah, get a cucumber to by you a drink or dinner?

a cucumber can be dinner.
Get a cucumber to chase away a burgler or open a jar?

u could throw the damn thing at somebody. jar-openin, i don't have problems with that...
Get a cucumber to listen to you while you bitch and moan?

cucumbers don't have mouths, so we won't have 2 listen 2 any reciprocation. nod
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Reply #28 posted 04/06/03 6:09pm

BattierBeMyDad
dy

avatar

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

cucumbers don't have mouths, so we won't have 2 listen 2 any reciprocation. nod


I would call that a con...
-------
A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti...
"I've just had an apostrophe!"
"I think you mean an epiphany..."
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #29 posted 04/06/03 6:27pm

Paisley

SuperC said:

Yeah, get a cucumber to by you a drink or dinner?
Get a cucumber to chase away a burgler or open a jar?
Get a cucumber to listen to you while you bitch and moan?

HMMM looks like Lisa hit a nerve. wink
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