1. What car someone drives or if I’ve been invited to a party.

Just three years ago my husband became critically ill and had a double lung transplant. After that experience, it is hard to give a shit about the superfluous things in life.

2. Romance.

Seriously? I don’t need hearts and flowers and Valentines. My husband is not exactly Mr. Romance, and at this point in my life, I don’t want all of that crap. As far as sex and intimacy go, I’m old enough to know exactly what I want, so let’s just get to it, shall we?

3. Being the perfect parent.

Ha! No one is a perfect parent. No matter what, I am going to screw up. And count on it, my children will remind me of my screw ups much more often than they will talk about all the wonderful things I did for them. I feel good about the way I raised my children, and I have never been burdened with being perfect. Why beat myself up? They turned out well, and I’m proud of the people they have become.

4. Being cool.

I have never been “cool” a day in my life. I’m clumsy, I fall a lot, I’m attention-challenged and can barely keep track of my glasses or my car keys. I’m nerdy about things like English history and taking photos of fish. There is absolutely no point any longer in trying to be cool, so I embrace who I am, and I don’t worry about it anymore.

5. Black Friday.

I’ve never liked shopping that much, but the older I get, the more I shop online. I’d rather join the circus than wait in line at 4 am to go to a store on Black Friday.

6. Pleasing every single person I care about.

Talk about a way to give yourself a heart attack! I have spent far too much time in my life trying to make other people happy. I have learned that I can’t please everybody and don’t waste time feeling guilty about it. Let people worry about pleasing me for a change.

7. Gossip about movie and tv stars.

Honestly, who are these people? They all look like they are twelve years old. Who gives a shit about what the Kardashians are doing? Robert Kardashian had the bad luck to be pals with OJ Simpson and then die, but why is his family famous for it?

8. Cooking and cleaning.

I have no interest in either, and I cannot get myself motivated to do much in the house, period. I’d rather be with my dogs, kayaking at the lake, writing, looking at my photos, doing yoga, swimming or traveling. In other words, I’d rather do just about anything rather than cook or clean. Nowadays my meals come from My Fit Foods, Simply Fit Meals, or Snap Kitchen. I can barely get motivated to stick my multigrain frozen waffles in the toaster, let alone cook an entire meal.

9. Stuff.

When I hit fifty, I realized that I had a house full of stuff that doesn’t really mean much anymore. What am I going to do with all of this stuff? I have to go through it and get rid of it, so I really don’t give a shit about getting more, newer, stuff. Have you ever gone to an estate sale and seen all of the stuff people collect in a lifetime and never get rid of? So sad.

too true!

Star Trek turned 50

i did that shit when i was fitteen,

you gotta pick up the pace

thanks 4 sharing your wisdom

Good thread, had I done it, I would of changed it to "99 Things I stopped giving a fuck about when I turned 40"

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So true, especially the bits about romance, gossip and cars. Live every day of life as a gift and live it with joy.

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Yesterday an older friend of mine showed me a quote that went something like this.

"Why worry about dying with a perfect and flawless body, feeling good about how responsible your life was. Is it not better to die with a wrecked and wasted body, with a glass of champagen in one hand and chocolate in the other thing "Wow that was one hell of a ride"

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Got a reaction out of me.

Hear, hear.

At 44, the only item on this list that I still care about is cooking and cleaning. I'm way sensitive to mess, and I dig a good homecooked meal. Everything else... eh.

morningsong said:

1. What car someone drives or if I’ve been invited to a party.

Just three years ago my husband became critically ill and had a double lung transplant. After that experience, it is hard to give a shit about the superfluous things in life.

2. Romance.

Seriously? I don’t need hearts and flowers and Valentines. My husband is not exactly Mr. Romance, and at this point in my life, I don’t want all of that crap. As far as sex and intimacy go, I’m old enough to know exactly what I want, so let’s just get to it, shall we?

3. Being the perfect parent.

Ha! No one is a perfect parent. No matter what, I am going to screw up. And count on it, my children will remind me of my screw ups much more often than they will talk about all the wonderful things I did for them. I feel good about the way I raised my children, and I have never been burdened with being perfect. Why beat myself up? They turned out well, and I’m proud of the people they have become.

4. Being cool.

I have never been “cool” a day in my life. I’m clumsy, I fall a lot, I’m attention-challenged and can barely keep track of my glasses or my car keys. I’m nerdy about things like English history and taking photos of fish. There is absolutely no point any longer in trying to be cool, so I embrace who I am, and I don’t worry about it anymore.

5. Black Friday.

I’ve never liked shopping that much, but the older I get, the more I shop online. I’d rather join the circus than wait in line at 4 am to go to a store on Black Friday.

6. Pleasing every single person I care about.

Talk about a way to give yourself a heart attack! I have spent far too much time in my life trying to make other people happy. I have learned that I can’t please everybody and don’t waste time feeling guilty about it. Let people worry about pleasing me for a change.

7. Gossip about movie and tv stars.

Honestly, who are these people? They all look like they are twelve years old. Who gives a shit about what the Kardashians are doing? Robert Kardashian had the bad luck to be pals with OJ Simpson and then die, but why is his family famous for it?

8. Cooking and cleaning.

I have no interest in either, and I cannot get myself motivated to do much in the house, period. I’d rather be with my dogs, kayaking at the lake, writing, looking at my photos, doing yoga, swimming or traveling. In other words, I’d rather do just about anything rather than cook or clean. Nowadays my meals come from My Fit Foods, Simply Fit Meals, or Snap Kitchen. I can barely get motivated to stick my multigrain frozen waffles in the toaster, let alone cook an entire meal.

9. Stuff.

When I hit fifty, I realized that I had a house full of stuff that doesn’t really mean much anymore. What am I going to do with all of this stuff? I have to go through it and get rid of it, so I really don’t give a shit about getting more, newer, stuff. Have you ever gone to an estate sale and seen all of the stuff people collect in a lifetime and never get rid of? So sad.

1. I agree with you wholeheartedly. A car is just a vehicle to get you where you need to go. Who needs to have a Jaguar, Mercedes, or Ferrari to get around from place to place?

2. I sort of disagree with you there, because we all want to show love and be loved by our most significant others, but the way we experience what we call romance differs significantly at age 50 than at age 22. When we're young we have these rose-colored views of what romance is, mostly because experiencing love for the first time is so exciting and so intoxicating, and a lot of our views of romance are shaped by our parents' experiences and by pop culture. By the time you reach age 50 most people have experienced all of the blissful highs and excruciating lows of being in a relationship, so our views of romance are tempered by reality. While taking you loved one on an expensive date followed by a night of rose petals leading to the bedroom with a side of champagne may be romantic at age 22, at age 50 it may be something as simple as doing the dishes and washing the kids' laundry to take some pressure off the spouse.

3. No one is perfect, and there's no such thing as a perfect parent. All you can do is raise your children to the best your abilities.

4. I like to think of myself as being "beyond cool", which is not some ego trip about how much better I am about you, but not giving a damn about what other people think about me. I know who I am, and if you like me, great. If not, so what.

5. The only thing I enjoy about Black Friday is waking up, making some hot cocoa, and listening to some Steely Dan records. I used to entertain myself afterward by watching the Today show or CNN and seeing some stories about overzealous shoppers running over each other in a stampede or using pepper spray on other shoppers just to get some piece of crap. Of course a lot of that silliness has been dissipated by retailers opening up on Thanksgiving night, which I find even more loony.

6. Sort of what I said about being "beyond cool."

7. I was never totally into the whole gossip scene, though I would follow up on my favorite stars like Prince and Mariah Carey. But this was also before the whole social media explosion where it seemed every celebrity and wannabe celebrity took to social media to tell everyone what they had for breakfast. I personally could care less whether the Kardashians went to Rio to see the Olympic athletes or who Taylor Swift is dating.

9. I was forced to move about six years ago, and even though I was living alone, I was amazed at how much stuff I had accumulated over the years. I was stunned at the amount of stuff that was sitting in my closet that I hadn't seen or worn in years. Somewhere I have a potato chip maker (actually a rebranded Salad Shooter) boxed up that I haven't used since the 1990's. I think if everyone did a yearly spring cleaning, they would know exactly what they need to be happy and would not feel the need to buy some 3000 square foot house for just two to four people.

[Edited 8/27/16 18:12pm]

My responses anyway

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1. My car is an old bomb from the 2nd millenium AD and has dents and rust. It is not even mine, a perk from my partner, he gets another one, I get the old one. As for parties - what are those?

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2. I have a great relationship, there is almos no romance, more companionship and co existence, that is enough.

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3. I am gay and have no kids, nor do I want any - my cat is more than happy with our parenting.

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4. Is this in the summer, I was a outcast as a child, a geek as a teen and now I am comfortably eccentric, to me that is cool.

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5. I live in New Zealand, have no idea what a Black Friday is.

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6. I stopped caring about what strangers thought in my 20s.

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7. I live in NZ and have little interest in celebrities that are hot or current, most of my favourite stars are dead, and I still venerate them, as they are more worthy.

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8. I actually like this, a tidy house is an orderly house, but I am hardly housekeeper of the eyar and our house is small and looks like a shetl. Cooking never goes beyond functionald and basic, could not care less about gourmet crap like a cube of meat with dots and dashes of jus and the rest.

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9. Again, don't sweat the small stuff enjoy life, enjoy the fact the sun shines and you have lived another glorious day.

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By the way, this is a cool thread.

Somethings take longer than others to refocus on, but one eventually gets there.

kpowers said:

Star Trek turned 50

Would love to read TOS crew's list, they're in their 80s and still hittin' it. William Shatner on Twitter drives me nuts, how he have that much to say? All day, everyday.

[Edited 8/29/16 18:05pm]

morningsong said:

1. What car someone drives or if I’ve been invited to a party.

Just three years ago my husband became critically ill and had a double lung transplant. After that experience, it is hard to give a shit about the superfluous things in life. Agree 100%!

2. Romance.

Seriously? I don’t need hearts and flowers and Valentines. My husband is not exactly Mr. Romance, and at this point in my life, I don’t want all of that crap. As far as sex and intimacy go, I’m old enough to know exactly what I want, so let’s just get to it, shall we? Disagree 100%!

3. Being the perfect parent.

Ha! No one is a perfect parent. No matter what, I am going to screw up. And count on it, my children will remind me of my screw ups much more often than they will talk about all the wonderful things I did for them. I feel good about the way I raised my children, and I have never been burdened with being perfect. Why beat myself up? They turned out well, and I’m proud of the people they have become. Yep!

4. Being cool.

I have never been “cool” a day in my life. I’m clumsy, I fall a lot, I’m attention-challenged and can barely keep track of my glasses or my car keys. I’m nerdy about things like English history and taking photos of fish. There is absolutely no point any longer in trying to be cool, so I embrace who I am, and I don’t worry about it anymore. Yep...but I'm pretty cool!

5. Black Friday.

I’ve never liked shopping that much, but the older I get, the more I shop online. I’d rather join the circus than wait in line at 4 am to go to a store on Black Friday. I'm a guy so I quit caring about Black Friday 50 years ago. The only Black Friday I care about is the Steely Dan song!

6. Pleasing every single person I care about.

Talk about a way to give yourself a heart attack! I have spent far too much time in my life trying to make other people happy. I have learned that I can’t please everybody and don’t waste time feeling guilty about it. Let people worry about pleasing me for a change. Disagree 1,000%! Life for me is all about making other people happy. That doesn't mean I do to my own personal detriment but if I wasn't putting a smile on my loved ones' faces every day, I'd be pretty miserable and unhappy.

7. Gossip about movie and tv stars.

Honestly, who are these people? They all look like they are twelve years old. Who gives a shit about what the Kardashians are doing? Robert Kardashian had the bad luck to be pals with OJ Simpson and then die, but why is his family famous for it? Agree! There hasn't been a real movie star since, who? Jack Nicholson? Robert Redford? Maybe Brad Pitt? I pity those who think Ryan Gosling is a movie star. They have no idea what a real movie star is. The only actor in this generation that has a chance at being a real star is Leonardo DiCaprio.

8. Cooking and cleaning.

I have no interest in either, and I cannot get myself motivated to do much in the house, period. I’d rather be with my dogs, kayaking at the lake, writing, looking at my photos, doing yoga, swimming or traveling. In other words, I’d rather do just about anything rather than cook or clean. Nowadays my meals come from My Fit Foods, Simply Fit Meals, or Snap Kitchen. I can barely get motivated to stick my multigrain frozen waffles in the toaster, let alone cook an entire meal. Agree! Now that we're empty-nesters, it's somehow incredibly easy to keep our house clean. Imagine that! And we eat out pretty much every night. Loving it!

9. Stuff.

When I hit fifty, I realized that I had a house full of stuff that doesn’t really mean much anymore. What am I going to do with all of this stuff? I have to go through it and get rid of it, so I really don’t give a shit about getting more, newer, stuff. Have you ever gone to an estate sale and seen all of the stuff people collect in a lifetime and never get rid of? So sad. Agree 1,000,000%! But the women in my life are still hung up on stuff. I cleaned out my mother-in-law's garage this past weekend. I didn't think I would EVER convince her that she no longer needed the garden chemicals she bought 18 years ago, when she lived in a different house. But sanity finally prevailed and now she can park 2 cars in her 2-car garage!

Just accept a thousand hugs and kisses and you are fine babee.

Avoid One Song and you are fine.