i've been reading on various forums that after somebody breaks up with you and you still want them

back the best thing to do is not to beg them to come back to you but to do the opposite..go full no contact and make them wonder how come you havent contacted them and make them curious about what your doing...do you think this works?

Cut it off clean.

If someone breaks up with you and you still want them, frankly there's nothing you can do. They are their own person who has already told you what they want - and that's to not be together.

The best thing to do for yourself is to have no contact so you can heal and not delude yourself into thinking you might be able to get back together.

GeorgieAto said:

i've been reading on various forums that after somebody breaks up with you and you still want them

back the best thing to do is not to beg them to come back to you but to do the opposite..go full no contact and make them wonder how come you havent contacted them and make them curious about what your doing...do you think this works?

They won't respect you if you beg them to come back, so definitely don't do that.

What you want to do is hook up with her best friend (hopefully it's a girl) and guaranteed she'll come back to you.

Pokeno4Money said:

CarrieMpls said:

Fuck love Im tired of trying as someone said "Cut it Off."

nursev said:

Fuck love Im tired of trying as someone said "Cut it Off."

Oh dear... I'm afraid that was me...

purplethunder3121 said:

nursev said:

Fuck love Im tired of trying as someone said "Cut it Off."

Oh dear... I'm afraid that was me...

n u were right

purplethunder3121 said:

Cut it off clean.

Best advice.

Quickest way to grieve, heal and move on.

If she comes back...cool...if not, you will soon notice there are other options available.

You can always remember that you were lucky that you did know her - but that was just a moment in time.

It is a fact of life, that people will come in-and-out of your life...some encounters are fleeting...some stay for longer...but hopefully the encounters will be enriching.

GeorgieAto said:

Thank you all for the good advice I really appreciate it I guess it's like that saying if it's meant to be it will be

Not always though. People often use the "it wasn't meant to be" as an excuse for their behavior or mistakes, they use it as a way to avoid accountability.

If they break up with you because of something wrong you did, whether it be cheating or physical abuse or whatever, then you shouldn't use the "it wasn't meant to be" line. No, you weren't meant to be apart ... if you didn't screw up, you wouldn't be.

So I guess the question is, why did she break up with you? If it's because you screwed up, then you SHOULD apologize and show genuine remorse. If she doesn't accept your apology and give you another chance, then forget about her. Because if someone isn't willing to forgive (with the exception of serious offenses such as cheating, physical abuse, etc) then that's not somebody you'd want in your life longterm. Everybody screws up. Those who are quick to leave because of a screwup, never really intended to stay.

Pokeno4Money said:

GeorgieAto said:

Thank you all for the good advice I really appreciate it I guess it's like that saying if it's meant to be it will be

Not always though. People often use the "it wasn't meant to be" as an excuse for their behavior or mistakes, they use it as a way to avoid accountability.

If they break up with you because of something wrong you did, whether it be cheating or physical abuse or whatever, then you shouldn't use the "it wasn't meant to be" line. No, you weren't meant to be apart ... if you didn't screw up, you wouldn't be.

So I guess the question is, why did she break up with you? If it's because you screwed up, then you SHOULD apologize and show genuine remorse. If she doesn't accept your apology and give you another chance, then forget about her. Because if someone isn't willing to forgive (with the exception of serious offenses such as cheating, physical abuse, etc) then that's not somebody you'd want in your life longterm. Everybody screws up. Those who are quick to leave because of a screwup, never really intended to stay.

naw none of that.there's still love there on both sides..never had a fight or angry words its just right now both situations make it tough... like distance & family on both sides...in other words we can't be free at the moment to do what we want without stress on both sides..with the most stress being on her end..so i understand why it happened its just after 3 years i miss her

GeorgieAto said:

Pokeno4Money said:

Not always though. People often use the "it wasn't meant to be" as an excuse for their behavior or mistakes, they use it as a way to avoid accountability.

If they break up with you because of something wrong you did, whether it be cheating or physical abuse or whatever, then you shouldn't use the "it wasn't meant to be" line. No, you weren't meant to be apart ... if you didn't screw up, you wouldn't be.

So I guess the question is, why did she break up with you? If it's because you screwed up, then you SHOULD apologize and show genuine remorse. If she doesn't accept your apology and give you another chance, then forget about her. Because if someone isn't willing to forgive (with the exception of serious offenses such as cheating, physical abuse, etc) then that's not somebody you'd want in your life longterm. Everybody screws up. Those who are quick to leave because of a screwup, never really intended to stay.

naw none of that.there's still love there on both sides..never had a fight or angry words its just right now both situations make it tough... like distance & family on both sides...in other words we can't be free at the moment to do what we want without stress on both sides..with the most stress being on her end..so i understand why it happened its just after 3 years i miss her

Then I don't really understand why she hasn't made an attempt to stay in touch with you, since you split on good terms. Who knows, situations can change. I would still move on, but I'd keep in touch with her because you never know what the future will bring.

Pokeno4Money said:

GeorgieAto said:

naw none of that.there's still love there on both sides..never had a fight or angry words its just right now both situations make it tough... like distance & family on both sides...in other words we can't be free at the moment to do what we want without stress on both sides..with the most stress being on her end..so i understand why it happened its just after 3 years i miss her

Then I don't really understand why she hasn't made an attempt to stay in touch with you, since you split on good terms. Who knows, situations can change. I would still move on, but I'd keep in touch with her because you never know what the future will bring.

well its only been 2 days

I guess I'd tell them that you still care for them and hope that one day you can get back together. Tell them that until that day, you'll do everything you can to prove you're the kind of person they would be proud to be with.

Don't beg, but don't cut off all contact. Just be a good person and accept what happens. Good luck!

RodeoSchro said:

GeorgieAto said:

Pokeno4Money said:

Then I don't really understand why she hasn't made an attempt to stay in touch with you, since you split on good terms. Who knows, situations can change. I would still move on, but I'd keep in touch with her because you never know what the future will bring.

well its only been 2 days

My girl just moved back abroad for her family - indefinitely, as her parents have hit a rough patch.

So we enjoyed our time before she left - and agreed that there will always be room for each other in our lives, whatever happens...

But, as it is indefinite, it would be unfair on either of us not to move on with our lives - romantically, if the right person came along...

But whatever, there will always be our friendship - and ultimately, all relationships must have that as a foundation...

If down the line - the stars align, then who knows - but until then just be there when she needs you...and you have to move on...

Cos if it ain't so...life does still go...

Throw yourself a pity party for a few days and then move on. A clean break is best. The only time begging works is when YOU are the one who f*cked the relationship up. But even then, begging doesn't always work. It's depending on what you did.

GeorgieAto said:

Pokeno4Money said:

Then I don't really understand why she hasn't made an attempt to stay in touch with you, since you split on good terms. Who knows, situations can change. I would still move on, but I'd keep in touch with her because you never know what the future will bring.

well its only been 2 days

Ahhh ... I didn't know that! And when you said "after 3 years I miss her" I thought you meant you've been apart 3 years!

Yeah I'd move on, but if she contacts you then I'd still be friendly. I wouldn't give her the silent treatment, from what it sounds like she did nothing wrong.

GeorgieAto said:

i've been reading on various forums that after somebody breaks up with you and you still want them

back the best thing to do is not to beg them to come back to you but to do the opposite..go full no contact and make them wonder how come you havent contacted them and make them curious about what your doing...do you think this works?

The last part sounds like manipulating someone, not a good thing.

GeorgieAto said:

i've been reading on various forums that after somebody breaks up with you and you still want them

back the best thing to do is not to beg them to come back to you but to do the opposite..go full no contact and make them wonder how come you havent contacted them and make them curious about what your doing...do you think this works?

No.

Probably the most universally attractive trait in a potential mate, is confidence. If you can focus on making your life the kind of life you wnt, that will translate to making you more attractive.

Don't prostrate yourself to get back in her good graces right away. A happy person leading a good life, is what you want people to see when they look at you.

Let it go.

Love who loves you.

bobzilla77 said:

Probably the most universally attractive trait in a potential mate, is confidence. If you can focus on making your life the kind of life you wnt, that will translate to making you more attractive.

Don't prostrate yourself to get back in her good graces right away. A happy person leading a good life, is what you want people to see when they look at you.

I love this post...it is beautiful!

"If you are lonely when you are alone...then you are in bad company" - Jean Paul Sartre

bobzilla77 said: