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Younger Men: A Question for the Ladies of the Org So, out of the blue last week I got a message on a dating site from a guy in his early 20s (I'm in my 30s). I was initially skeptical but decided to give him a chance to see what he's about. We met up for dinner a few days ago and the conversation went well. He texted me the next day and it seems that the conversation is going pretty good for the most part, however, the skeptic in me is wondering if he's one of these young guys that's shopping for a sugar mama. I told him that I don't believe in going Dutch on dates (I told him before we met up, not when the bill came, LOL) so he paid for everything.
Do any of you ladies here on the Org have any positive experiences from dating younger men or do you have any disasters from dealing with younger guys? Although I had a good time, I'm still very skeptical about why he got in touch with me in the first place. I asked him how he came across my profile since there have to be certain search parameters, etc. but he didn't want to tell me how he came across it. Strange but I just brushed it off.
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Runnnnnnnnnnnnn!!! Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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"Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination and life to everything." --Plato
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Ha, that's funny! Well, he shared with me that when he was 19 he dated a 33 year old! I thought that was "interesting". He said the relationship ended because she had some issues or whatever with an ex-boyfriend. I didn't really do much digging on that! Trolls be gone! | |
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Hmm, run TO him or AWAY from him? LOL Trolls be gone! | |
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He paid? Willingly? You better sit back and enjoy the ride. Was he cute? | |
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I don't think you can expect a younger man to pay for everything. | |
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If you're in your thirties & want kids then I would say having them with a guy in his early 20's increases the odds of you ending up a single mum.
If you're lookin 4 a life partner/husband material the odds of divorce go up. If u ended up in a relationship with him u could one day find yourself back on the shelf, after wasting precious time with a boy taking up your man space. I don't do younger men, since I was 21 all my partners have been older than me. If u want some fun/a fling, he might be the one. [Edited 8/10/15 16:24pm] "We just let people talk & say whatever they want 2 say. 9 times out of 10, trust me, what's out there now, I wouldn't give nary one of these folks the time of day. That's why I don't say anything back, because there's so much that's wrong" - P, Dec '15 | |
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It depends. [Snip - luv4u] | |
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low blow. off topic? “Transracial is a term that has long since been defined as the adoption of a child that is of a different race than the adoptive parents,” : https://thinkprogress.org...fb6e18544a | |
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morningsong said: He paid? Willingly? You better sit back and enjoy the ride. Was he cute? Yeah he paid yeah he was better looking in person actually Trolls be gone! | |
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in a case of rarity if the younger man is financially established, i mean like on his own (over 21) and is not on a quest for older women, i think it's okay. a good friend of mine is 10yrs older than her bo. they seem to have a great relationship. most of all (she says) he still likes to have fun. “Transracial is a term that has long since been defined as the adoption of a child that is of a different race than the adoptive parents,” : https://thinkprogress.org...fb6e18544a | |
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Cinny said: I don't think you can expect a younger man to pay for everything. Hey Cinny! He seems like he's doing okay to me lol I went on a date with a guy older than me a month ago and he didn't order food and only paid half the bill when it came lol so you never know Trolls be gone! | |
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NinaB said: If you're in your thirties & want kids then I would say having them with a guy in his early 20's increases the odds of you ending up a single mum. I'm not looking for a husband. He seemed surprised that I don't have kids and he asked me how I managed not to have kids by this age and my answer... birth control and I laughed lolIf you're lookin 4 a life partner/husband material the odds of divorce go up. If u ended up in a relationship with him u could one day find yourself back on the shelf, after wasting precious time with a boy taking up your man space. I don't do younger men, since I was 21 all my partners have been older than me. If u want some fun/a fling, he might be the one. [Edited 8/10/15 16:24pm] Trolls be gone! | |
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Ohh purple joy oh purple bliss oh purple rapture! REAL MUSIC by REAL MUSICIANS - Prince "I kind of wish there was a reason for Prince to make the site crash more" ~~ Ben |
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luv4u said:
I knew what you meant Why do you think I should run? Trolls be gone! | |
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free2bfreeda said: in a case of rarity if the younger man is financially established, i mean like on his own (over 21) and is not on a quest for older women, i think it's okay. a good friend of mine is 10yrs older than her bo. they seem to have a great relationship. most of all (she says) he still likes to have fun. That's interesting... How long has your friend been with her boyfriend? Trolls be gone! | |
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SeventeenDayze said: morningsong said: He paid? Willingly? You better sit back and enjoy the ride. Was he cute? Yeah he paid yeah he was better looking in person actually He's legal, he accepted the terms of dating you, you enjoyed yourself, he showed interest. And the problem is? It ain't like you're 50 and he's 20. In my personal life ive seen a plenty great relationships when she's a shade older than him. Maybe he has issues, who doesn't. He might be the challenge you need, he might not, Enjoy. | |
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Dating is a costly endeavor at any age.
Back in the day if a man couldn't afford to date he stayed home, with a woody, and a blow-up doll... he didn't have any choice. Guys either made sure they could take care of themselves and date or remained horny and very single. My late father told me when I was a teenager, "Don't ever date "broke" men."A man who's short on funds should be about putting his energy and limited resources to making sure his economic condition changes. If a man can't afford to date, that's his problem not yours". My husband said the same thing to our daughter years ago.
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[Edited 8/11/15 4:31am] | |
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morningsong said: SeventeenDayze said: Yeah he paid yeah he was better looking in person actually He's legal, he accepted the terms of dating you, you enjoyed yourself, he showed interest. And the problem is? It ain't like you're 50 and he's 20. In my personal life ive seen a plenty great relationships when she's a shade older than him. Maybe he has issues, who doesn't. He might be the challenge you need, he might not, Enjoy. Yeah I hear you. I guess a part of me is perpetually skeptical. It's hard for me to not be cynical. Trolls be gone! | |
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TD3 said:
Dating is a costly endeavor at any age.
Back in the day if a man couldn't afford to date he stayed home, with a woody, and a blow-up doll... he didn't have any choice. Guys either made sure they could take care of themselves and date or remained horny and very single. My late father told me when I was a teenager, "Don't ever date "broke" men."A man who's short on funds should be about putting his energy and limited resources to making sure his economic condition changes. If a man can't afford to date, that was his problem not yours". My husband said the same thing to our daughter years ago.
That's good advice. Yeah that's why I asked this guy up front before we met who should pay for dates and gold him that I don't do Dutch dates. I said that maybe over time I might pay half on occasion but for the most part don't plan on going Dutch at all. So if he wants to keep seeing me but thinks he's gonna use me gor money he's gonna end up spending a lot of money in the meantime just to find out I'm not gullible lol Trolls be gone! | |
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I'm not unsympathetic to what it cost to date and I never took issue with what was spent. I respected men who were creative on what we did or where we went. My home town is Chicago but I 've lived in other large urban areas and there's a lot of stuff you can attend for free... put together a picnic lunch, learn how to cook. I attended many art fairs, book readings, music concerts, movies in the park, and later treated to a hot dog at a stand. Talking to by daughter a lot of men are too clueless, lazy, or I guess unmotivated to see these options. Unmotivated men are usually unmotivated in other parts of their lives. Yes, the economy is so different from decades past, but it appears a lot of unmotivated men who've been able to shift the thinking, no demands should be put on them. That's why woman shouldn't date or fuck around with broke men... that's coming from an old broad who's been around the block a couple of times. It's been my experience men who really like you don't ask you to go dutch anyways.
=========================== [Edited 8/11/15 6:24am] | |
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SeventeenDayze said: NinaB said: If you're in your thirties & want kids then I would say having them with a guy in his early 20's increases the odds of you ending up a single mum.
I'm not looking for a husband. He seemed surprised that I don't have kids and he asked me how I managed not to have kids by this age and my answer... birth control and I laughed lolIf you're lookin 4 a life partner/husband material the odds of divorce go up. If u ended up in a relationship with him u could one day find yourself back on the shelf, after wasting precious time with a boy taking up your man space. I don't do younger men, since I was 21 all my partners have been older than me. If u want some fun/a fling, he might be the one. [Edited 8/10/15 16:24pm] When I said husband material/life partner I meant as in if u wanted a serious, committed, long term relationship (or actual marriage). I thought u said something in another thread about being single 4 a while, & venturing into online dating with the aim to meet a decent man 2 be in a serious relationship with. In my subjective opinion/experience a guy in his early twenties ain't finished growing up. Like I said tho if it's a little fun you're lookin, he could come in handy. [Edited 8/10/15 22:35pm] "We just let people talk & say whatever they want 2 say. 9 times out of 10, trust me, what's out there now, I wouldn't give nary one of these folks the time of day. That's why I don't say anything back, because there's so much that's wrong" - P, Dec '15 | |
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It depends. [Snip - luv4u] | |
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Wow?? | |
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Yeah, but you can't say he is looking for a sugar mama if he wants to go DUTCH. That's not fair at all. I'm glad he was good for this date though. | |
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Cinnny! Lol! Of course... I was just saying that I hope he's not looking for a sugar mama and just because he didn't ask me to pay this time doesn't mean he won't try to ask me later to pay. I assume he's just on his good behavior for now. Trolls be gone! | |
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The reverse is also true. No broke-ass women for me. | |
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Is that right? So why is that? Do you want them to help you out financially from time to time? Trolls be gone! | |
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