I think maybe it was nothing cause we talked about future plans with potential partners and whether to have kids. I could have jumped in there but didn't at all. Still wants to be around me often though and me kind of the same cause we enjoy the same things for fun
Hmmmm. Interesting. Can you elaborate and give some examples?
From my experiences (and I've done the same in the past), some Arabs for example tend to be quick to point out how deeply in love they fell for the other person. And they'll go the extra mile to articulate it, even though its all flirtations . Westerner - again from my experiences - tend to be more practical, and some of them might take it literally. I'm not saying that Arabs are not genuine people when it comes to the matters of the heart, but the way they express admiration can sometimes be seen more emotional and folks might mistake it as falling in love in the traditional sense. Even when they refere to each other, we use terms of endearment such as "habibi" or "habibti" (which means beloved - former for guys & latter for women) and mind you, we use them casually. Its basically the culture & the language, both play big parts in flirtatious exchanges. I don't know if I'm making sense at this point, if not my apologies
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I dated an Arab man for a short time, many a year ago, and stopped dating him because we had went to the movies, and as we were leaving, he hugged me and said, "I think I've found my future wife." He began talking about wanting to take me to his homeland, how his parents were wanting him to settle down and if he didn't find his own wife, they would arrange a marriage for him, and all kinds of things. I just was looking for friendship from him, someone to go to the movies or dinner with, nothing more, so his talk kind of freaked me out!
From my experiences (and I've done the same in the past), some Arabs for example tend to be quick to point out how deeply in love they fell for the other person. And they'll go the extra mile to articulate it, even though its all flirtations . Westerner - again from my experiences - tend to be more practical, and some of them might take it literally. I'm not saying that Arabs are not genuine people when it comes to the matters of the heart, but the way they express admiration can sometimes be seen more emotional and folks might mistake it as falling in love in the traditional sense. Even when they refere to each other, we use terms of endearment such as "habibi" or "habibti" (which means beloved - former for guys & latter for women) and mind you, we use them casually. Its basically the culture & the language, both play big parts in flirtatious exchanges. I don't know if I'm making sense at this point, if not my apologies
.
I dated an Arab man for a short time, many a year ago, and stopped dating him because we had went to the movies, and as we were leaving, he hugged me and said, "I think I've found my future wife." He began talking about wanting to take me to his homeland, how his parents were wanting him to settle down and if he didn't find his own wife, they would arrange a marriage for him, and all kinds of things. I just was looking for friendship from him, someone to go to the movies or dinner with, nothing more, so his talk kind of freaked me out!
Lmao!
Sorry I don't mean to laugh but the image cracked me up. I understand where you coming from though. I understand where he was coming from too. Arab guys can either be extremely open with their feelings and they would think outloud in a way that makes a person think they're jumping from A to Z, or they would be nightmares when it comes to communication. I've been considered both in two separate situations in my life, and I'm trying to be moderate these days
Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future...
I dated an Arab man for a short time, many a year ago, and stopped dating him because we had went to the movies, and as we were leaving, he hugged me and said, "I think I've found my future wife." He began talking about wanting to take me to his homeland, how his parents were wanting him to settle down and if he didn't find his own wife, they would arrange a marriage for him, and all kinds of things. I just was looking for friendship from him, someone to go to the movies or dinner with, nothing more, so his talk kind of freaked me out!
Lmao!
Sorry I don't mean to laugh but the image cracked me up. I understand where you coming from though. I understand where he was coming from too. Arab guys can either be extremely open with their feelings and they would think outloud in a way that makes a person think they're jumping from A to Z, or they would be nightmares when it comes to communication. I've been considered both in two separate situations in my life, and I'm trying to be moderate these days
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lol - No, I laugh about it now, so no apologies necessary. It was an even funnier image, really, let's just say he was very excited to be giving me that hug. Throw in the "future wife" comment at the same time, after watching a really good comedy, and ... well, we didn't date very long. But yes, I can see how Arab guys would be considered to be extremely open with their feelings, and it did feel like jumping from A to Z. I'm not sure how someone could be that open, but also seem to be nightmares with communication too?? Is it sort of like being open at inappropriate times, and closed off at times in which communication would be appropriate?
Sorry I don't mean to laugh but the image cracked me up. I understand where you coming from though. I understand where he was coming from too. Arab guys can either be extremely open with their feelings and they would think outloud in a way that makes a person think they're jumping from A to Z, or they would be nightmares when it comes to communication. I've been considered both in two separate situations in my life, and I'm trying to be moderate these days
.
lol - No, I laugh about it now, so no apologies necessary. It was an even funnier image, really, let's just say he was very excited to be giving me that hug. Throw in the "future wife" comment at the same time, after watching a really good comedy, and ... well, we didn't date very long. But yes, I can see how Arab guys would be considered to be extremely open with their feelings, and it did feel like jumping from A to Z. I'm not sure how someone could be that open, but also seem to be nightmares with communication too?? Is it sort of like being open at inappropriate times, and closed off at times in which communication would be appropriate?
In a sense, yes. All I can speak is from my experience, for example I was guilty of pulling disappearing acts whenever I went through bad stuff, and I would reappear and make it seem like everything was ok & never talk about them. The person I was going with at the time didn't understand that and rightfully felt frustrated and left out. Especially since they shared their life with me to a full extent. It became a constant thing and it created a wedge between us until it killed the intimacy level altogether. Entirely my fault.
Mind you, I didn't come up with the earlier two stereotypes, I've had discussions with western friends who told me the same thing over & over I guess its true, who knows.
Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future...
lol - No, I laugh about it now, so no apologies necessary. It was an even funnier image, really, let's just say he was very excited to be giving me that hug. Throw in the "future wife" comment at the same time, after watching a really good comedy, and ... well, we didn't date very long. But yes, I can see how Arab guys would be considered to be extremely open with their feelings, and it did feel like jumping from A to Z. I'm not sure how someone could be that open, but also seem to be nightmares with communication too?? Is it sort of like being open at inappropriate times, and closed off at times in which communication would be appropriate?
In a sense, yes. All I can speak is from my experience, for example I was guilty of pulling disappearing acts whenever I went through bad stuff, and I would reappear and make it seem like everything was ok & never talk about them. The person I was going with at the time didn't understand that and rightfully felt frustrated and left out. Especially since they shared their life with me to a full extent. It became a constant thing and it created a wedge between us until it killed the intimacy level altogether. Entirely my fault.
Mind you, I didn't come up with the earlier two stereotypes, I've had discussions with western friends who told me the same thing over & over I guess its true, who knows.
A few intense tickle and poke fights later and still nothing uttered from either of us about where we are. Can't stop talking to each other even if we are silent either, I feel withdrawal and it's pretty clear the other end is like that when we're away from each other . It does feel like a game and we still go on about other potentials but more often than not.
[Edited 8/25/15 19:11pm] [Edited 8/25/15 19:12pm]
How did u end it? Did you confront what your status is or just cut them off to avoid rejection? I feel I'm afraid of rejection and flirtationship is safer than getting deeper, but it's also driving me nuts cause of what we could have been taking it further [Edited 8/29/15 5:23am]
How did u end it? Did you confront what your status is or just cut them off to avoid rejection? I feel I'm afraid of rejection and flirtationship is safer than getting deeper, but it's also driving me nuts cause of what we could have been taking it further
I had finally realized and accepted he was not interested, so to end it I told him that I had been looking for more and was frustrated because I thought we had chemistry. There was still no major blow up but it was unrequited because he just didn't want the same. I turned down a few more dates/flirts and I think eventually stopped communications.
You don't have to say if you don't want but what kind of flirting was there? We go out all the time dinner, shopping, local events, etc the way friends do but it feels more than that. I recently got asked again about people I've gone out with, and a chap she was surprised I liked from afar briefly though it was really to get over her and the idea
You don't have to say if you don't want but what kind of flirting was there? We go out all the time dinner, shopping, local events, etc the way friends do but it feels more than that. I recently got asked again about people I've gone out with, and a chap she was surprised I liked from afar briefly though it was really to get over her and the idea
I can't even remember, to be honest. Looking back, he was just a friend.
One road trip later she's still cool, but something she did really upset me and she was offended when I took charge of the situation like any responsible adult, and she was being childish trying to turn it around on me. I don't want to deal with her like that if we were serious so now I'm over it. We're fine as friends and always were. It's not what you think, it was an argument about something at a restaurant [Edited 8/31/15 15:37pm]
Some flirtations can be good though when both parties know where they stand.
I got contacted by this person who was in an open relationship (long distance too) a while ago, both of us knew there was no future as a couple. But the dialoug was refreshing and we enjoyed each other's banter.
Last month they contacted me again via FB and confessed that our flirty exchange helped them regain their confidence in themselves & thanked me. Had I not been told that, I probably would never know.
I guess it depends on the situation at hand after all
Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future...
I think I'm feeling something similar. That I will want compassion and PDA with someone someday. I was against it cause of a creep ex bf, but though me and her didn't go further, I feel that if I liked someone enough, I would initiate it, and I am capable, it's just not with her anymore . And I was missing my friend, was feeling trapped liking her, knowing we couldn't be together though we enjoyed company
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Hmmmm. Interesting. Can you elaborate and give some examples?
Throw in the "future wife" comment at the same time, after watching a really good comedy, and ... well, we didn't date very long. But yes, I can see how Arab guys would be considered to be extremely open with their feelings, and it did feel like jumping from A to Z. I'm not sure how someone could be that open, but also seem to be nightmares with communication too?? Is it sort of like being open at inappropriate times, and closed off at times in which communication would be appropriate? 
