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Thread started 01/04/15 8:17pm

Shyra

What Would You Do?


I live in a townhouse community that has assigned parking spaces. Depending on the model of home, each one is assigned one, two or zero parking spaces in the private parking lot. Homes with garages are not assigned parking lot spaces because of the garage and driveway, which accommodates two cars. Homes that have only a drive way are assigned one parking lot space, and homes with neither a garage or driveway are assigned two parking spaces in the lot.

Naturally, tenants who have more than two cars are in a bind and have to park elsewhere. There are a few spots reserved for visitors, and by law, a limited number of handicap spaces. Some tenants try to commandeer the visitor spaces, which is a violation of the covenants, and if they continue to violate, their cars are subject to fines and towing.

My neighbor has three cars because there are four adults sharing the house: a brother, his two sisters and his girlfriend. They are assigned two parking lot spaces as am I. The problem arose when sister #2 got what I thought was a rental car. She parked it in one of the visitor spots in violation of the covenant. The HOA president approached me and asked me if I would speak to the sister. I spoke too soon and agreed to do it, not thinking that it was her responsibility to contact the management company to issue a notice. Anyway, I agreed and when I called and explained the covenant, she said, "Well, where am I supposed to park my car?!" I asked her how long she would need a space, and she said, "For a while." and, me being the kind, accommodating person that I am said, "Oh, I understand your problem. I can let you use my second space for a while. I don't get that much company, and if my brother visits, he can use a handicap space. However, if I have more than one visitor, you will have to find other arrangements."

Now here is the issue. I am not being compensated for this huge favor. No, I did not ask for compensation at first, but this has been going on for several months now. Am I wrong to expect something in return? I was raised to treat people in the manner in which I want to be treated. If someone does me a huge favor, I do something nice for them in return, usually in the form of money or a comparable favor. Sometimes the brother’s girlfriend uses the space, sometimes the other sister uses the space, and sometimes I don't know whose car is parked there. It could be another neighbor who has taken for granted the spot is up for grabs. Incidentally, these are the same neighbors I posted the question, "How Much Should I Charge?" because I shuttle the other sister's two kids to and from school every school day. I am being compensated for gas in that instance, but had I not presented her a fair bill, she would have assume I would do it for free.

What would you do? confused

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Reply #1 posted 01/05/15 5:18am

XxAxX

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i have the same issue where i live. my condo complex has owners that refuse to rent a second garage for their vehicle and park in the guest spaces every night and every day, in obvious violation of the rules. every so often, we receive these scolding letters from the management company about how cars will be towed, etc. but that doesn't stop the problem.

in your case, i'd get her out of my parking space as nicely as possible and reaffirm the boundary which should not have been broken.

maybe let your management company know what's going on, how things turned out, and ask them to send a general notice to all tenants about the rules for parking. if your favor-abusing neighbor doesn't get the hint tell her as nicely as you can that - no hard feelings - but you'd prefer to have *your* parking space open for your own guests. good luck

[Edited 1/5/15 5:19am]

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Reply #2 posted 01/05/15 5:50am

Shyra

Thanks, X. Our management company is pretty diligent about towing. I think they have a contract with a tow company, and any repeat violators are prompty towed, so most tenants do try to avoid that.

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Reply #3 posted 01/05/15 6:45am

Pokeno4Money

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People are just lacking in common courtesy and decency these days, aren't they? I've got the same damn situation where I live, neighbors who fill up the guest parking 24/7 with their vehicles ... only it's way more ridiculous because some of the neighbors that are hogging the guest spaces have both a garage and their own private constantly near-empty driveway that can accomodate at least 8 cars!!!

But getting back to the OP, it's a bit of a touchy situation because their using one of your spaces hasn't impacted you - correct? So unless you need the space for guests or yourself, it's kinda hard to tell them "Get the hell out" and then just have the space sitting there empty. It's not like you could be renting out the space for profit to someone else, is it? But even though you shouldn't expect compensation for their continued use, the freeloading neighbor should certainly have the common decency to show their appreciation periodically in some manner ... if not with money, then with gift cards or presents or meals or offering to run errands for you or cleaning off your car in snowstorms etc.

"Never let nasty stalkers disrespect you. They start shit, you finish it. Go down to their level, that's the only way they'll understand. You have to handle things yourself."
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Reply #4 posted 01/05/15 7:17am

MoBettaBliss


i think you should learn to say no

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Reply #5 posted 01/05/15 7:57am

Slave2daGroove

Communicate what you want. If refused, have it towed.

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Reply #6 posted 01/05/15 10:42am

Shyra

Thanks to you all. I just feel like they are taking advantage of my kindness. Plus they lead me on with hints of promising me things like my favorite restaurant gift card or home made meals which never come to fruition. This really pisses me off. Don't tell me you're going to do something and then just don't do it. I was expecting a little something at Christmas, but I did not receive so much as a Christmas card. The real clincher was that the brother sent his niece to my house Christmas day asking to borrow some big pots. I had a very large canning pot, a stainless steel 4 quart pot, and my $250.00 Le Crueset 5.5 quart dutch oven, which demands special care. He kept my pots a week, and I finally had to tell the niece to tell him I needed my pots returned. She brought back the canning pot and the stainless steel but not the Le Crueset. I asked her why that one was not being returned and she said, "Uncle Reggie said he needs that one." OH HELL NAW!!! I think I might have actually said that, or something close to it. I do remember telling her, "You tell Reggie I want my pot back. I need it to make something." I was lying through my teeth. I just refused to let him play me like that. I am almost positive if I had not asked for its return, he would still have my damn pot, and I knew if he fucked it up, he would not be willing to pay me for it. To his credit, he did return it later that day in pristine condition. I don't think he even used it, thank God. The other two were returned smelling of collard greens and pig feet.



After much contemplation, I've made up my mind. I'm going to write a note, not a bitter, bitchy note, but one explaining that my parking space is valuable real estate which deserves some form of compensation. Beginning February 1, 2015 I'm charging the other sister $6.00 a day to rent my space. I think that is very reasonable, especially if they divide that by two or three users. They each could contribute $2.00 a day, which is less than a meal at McDonald's.



[Edited 1/5/15 10:50am]

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Reply #7 posted 01/05/15 11:46am

jon1967

time for em to go .. no more nice

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Reply #8 posted 01/05/15 12:36pm

bobzilla77

After much contemplation, I've made up my mind. I'm going to write a note, not a bitter, bitchy note, but one explaining that my parking space is valuable real estate which deserves some form of compensation. Beginning February 1, 2015 I'm charging the other sister $6.00 a day to rent my space. I think that is very reasonable, especially if they divide that by two or three users. They each could contribute $2.00 a day, which is less than a meal at McDonald's

I don't think that is a good idea. You are just going to create more drama with a nickel-and-diming routine every month. "Who used it more this month? Well I didn't come over for that whole week." It sounds like they will leave it to you to figure it out and you being the nice person you are will end up letting it slide, until you start to feel you are being taken advantage of.

$6 a day = $180 a month/ $2160 a year, that's pretty serious dough to ask for something you have been giving them free.

I remember the other thread about driving the kid to school too. It sounds like you are a very generous person but that sometimes people take advantage of that nature. Please remember that you have no obligation to fix every person's logistical problems, even if you are able to.

If you don't work for the HOA, they should not be asking you to mediate disputes with tenants. That was the first thing you could have said "no" to.

What would make sense to me: if the apartment "comes with" two parking spaces, presumably that has some value. Say the value is $100 a month per spot. Maybe your association manager can make a deal where you surrender one of your two spots to them, and get a $100 break on your rent and they pay $100 more. That would satisfy the manager, you AND them as long as they are willing to cough up more. If they aren't, well, they can live the parking spaces they have like everyone else has to.

And if the HOA won't do that, hey, you're not the world's problem fixer.

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Reply #9 posted 01/05/15 2:16pm

Shyra

bobzilla77 said:

After much contemplation, I've made up my mind. I'm going to write a note, not a bitter, bitchy note, but one explaining that my parking space is valuable real estate which deserves some form of compensation. Beginning February 1, 2015 I'm charging the other sister $6.00 a day to rent my space. I think that is very reasonable, especially if they divide that by two or three users. They each could contribute $2.00 a day, which is less than a meal at McDonald's

I don't think that is a good idea. You are just going to create more drama with a nickel-and-diming routine every month. "Who used it more this month? Well I didn't come over for that whole week." It sounds like they will leave it to you to figure it out and you being the nice person you are will end up letting it slide, until you start to feel you are being taken advantage of.

$6 a day = $180 a month/ $2160 a year, that's pretty serious dough to ask for something you have been giving them free.

I remember the other thread about driving the kid to school too. It sounds like you are a very generous person but that sometimes people take advantage of that nature. Please remember that you have no obligation to fix every person's logistical problems, even if you are able to.

If you don't work for the HOA, they should not be asking you to mediate disputes with tenants. That was the first thing you could have said "no" to.

What would make sense to me: if the apartment "comes with" two parking spaces, presumably that has some value. Say the value is $100 a month per spot. Maybe your association manager can make a deal where you surrender one of your two spots to them, and get a $100 break on your rent and they pay $100 more. That would satisfy the manager, you AND them as long as they are willing to cough up more. If they aren't, well, they can live the parking spaces they have like everyone else has to.

And if the HOA won't do that, hey, you're not the world's problem fixer.

Thanks, Bob. Most of the residents of this community own their townhouse. Some owners rent their houses. My neighbors are renters.

I understand what you're saying regarding forfeiting my second spot to the HO association, but I do not want to do that because I might need it later, and getting them to turn it back over to me could get complicated. I think I reserve the right to charge what I want for my parking space. I also understand that it could get hairy later on regarding who uses the spot when and for how long. Again, that's not my problem. If I am allowing the use of that spot daily regardless of which tenant occupies it, a daily rental is acceptable because the spot is occupied every day by one of the three tenants. The amount of time each tenant uses the spot is of no consequence to me either because it is always available to at least one of them 24/7. As it stands now, they use it in tandem almost daily depending on who gets home first or who occupied it last.

Six bucks a day is dirt cheap for metro Washington, DC. If they were to park in a public parking lot/garage, they would have to pay upwards of $15/$25 daily. And some people who sell their parking spaces in the city charge anywhere from $15,000 to $30,000! Six bucks a day is a freaking bargain. Remember, this is 2015.

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Reply #10 posted 01/06/15 4:11am

Shyra

Pokeno4Money said:

People are just lacking in common courtesy and decency these days, aren't they? I've got the same damn situation where I live, neighbors who fill up the guest parking 24/7 with their vehicles ... only it's way more ridiculous because some of the neighbors that are hogging the guest spaces have both a garage and their own private constantly near-empty driveway that can accomodate at least 8 cars!!!

But getting back to the OP, it's a bit of a touchy situation because their using one of your spaces hasn't impacted you - correct? So unless you need the space for guests or yourself, it's kinda hard to tell them "Get the hell out" and then just have the space sitting there empty. It's not like you could be renting out the space for profit to someone else, is it? But even though you shouldn't expect compensation for their continued use, the freeloading neighbor should certainly have the common decency to show their appreciation periodically in some manner ... if not with money, then with gift cards or presents or meals or offering to run errands for you or cleaning off your car in snowstorms etc.



See. Had this happened from jump street, I would have let them use it without charge. You just can't be nice to "some people," if you get my drift. I guess it's a basic lack of being taught graciousness and common manners. This trend of "getting over" is prevalent and quite disconcerting. Really sad.

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Reply #11 posted 01/06/15 1:46pm

Pokeno4Money

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Shyra said:

See. Had this happened from jump street, I would have let them use it without charge. You just can't be nice to "some people," if you get my drift. I guess it's a basic lack of being taught graciousness and common manners. This trend of "getting over" is prevalent and quite disconcerting. Really sad.


Yup, you are 100% right. It really isn't taught anymore, I can't even get a simple "Thank you" from younger relatives when I give them gifts. Those who show their appreciation make me want to give them things and do things for them. Those who don't show appreciation will get less and less from me.


"Why didn't you give me a Valentines Day gift this year Uncle Pokeno?"

"Well my niece, you never thanked me last year so I just assumed you didn't want Valentines gifts anymore." innocent


"Never let nasty stalkers disrespect you. They start shit, you finish it. Go down to their level, that's the only way they'll understand. You have to handle things yourself."
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Reply #12 posted 01/06/15 1:57pm

Pokeno4Money

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Shyra said:

Six bucks a day is dirt cheap for metro Washington, DC. If they were to park in a public parking lot/garage, they would have to pay upwards of $15/$25 daily. And some people who sell their parking spaces in the city charge anywhere from $15,000 to $30,000! Six bucks a day is a freaking bargain. Remember, this is 2015.


I had no clue how much parking costs where you are! If you think other neighbors might be willing to pay for the use of your spare space, I say let everyone know it's available and rent it to the highest bidder. That way it would be the freeloading neighbor's choice as to whether or not they keep using the space, based on their willingness to outbid everyone else. wink

[Edited 1/6/15 13:58pm]

"Never let nasty stalkers disrespect you. They start shit, you finish it. Go down to their level, that's the only way they'll understand. You have to handle things yourself."
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Reply #13 posted 01/07/15 5:16am

Shyra

Pokeno4Money said:

Shyra said:

Six bucks a day is dirt cheap for metro Washington, DC. If they were to park in a public parking lot/garage, they would have to pay upwards of $15/$25 daily. And some people who sell their parking spaces in the city charge anywhere from $15,000 to $30,000! Six bucks a day is a freaking bargain. Remember, this is 2015.


I had no clue how much parking costs where you are! If you think other neighbors might be willing to pay for the use of your spare space, I say let everyone know it's available and rent it to the highest bidder. That way it would be the freeloading neighbor's choice as to whether or not they keep using the space, based on their willingness to outbid everyone else. wink

[Edited 1/6/15 13:58pm]



That is a good idea if my neighbor starts to "get slick" by not parking there after my February 1 deadline. That is when my rental fee goes into effect. I know how people will try to get over. She might not use it for the first two or three weeks and then ease back in for a day or two and so on. If she sees that I have allowed someone else to rent it, that would put a stop to that.

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Reply #14 posted 01/10/15 3:57pm

paintedlady

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I wouldn't do the money stuff...

I would give the neighbors a time line... a week, two weeks what ever you are comfortable with and tell them that they will have to find other accommodations for parking. The reason is your own, and none of their business. You just need the space freed up and they knew the parking restrictions before she acquired 3-4 cars for that household. It is not your problem, don't let them make it your problem, and you are not responsible for their poor planning. Also, keep the conversation/issue to her being parked there now two over months and that you never expected this to become a permanent thing. Her parking there was ONLY a tempoary measure. Keep your tone real business like and have them refer to their management... also inform your neighbors that they have over extended the courtesy you have given them in using your space.

Never haggle over $$$ when you really want them out of your space, because then now you will have to chase them to pay you a fee. It's too much of a headache and those people seem like they aren't very courteous.

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Reply #15 posted 01/10/15 8:04pm

Shyra

paintedlady said:

I wouldn't do the money stuff...

I would give the neighbors a time line... a week, two weeks what ever you are comfortable with and tell them that they will have to find other accommodations for parking. The reason is your own, and none of their business. You just need the space freed up and they knew the parking restrictions before she acquired 3-4 cars for that household. It is not your problem, don't let them make it your problem, and you are not responsible for their poor planning. Also, keep the conversation/issue to her being parked there now two over months and that you never expected this to become a permanent thing. Her parking there was ONLY a tempoary measure. Keep your tone real business like and have them refer to their management... also inform your neighbors that they have over extended the courtesy you have given them in using your space.

Never haggle over $$$ when you really want them out of your space, because then now you will have to chase them to pay you a fee. It's too much of a headache and those people seem like they aren't very courteous.

Well, it's too late now because I already sent the note telling her she has until February 1 to make up her mind what she wants to do. After that the fee is $6.00 a day. It might get funky if she just ignores me and tries to use it intermittently. I will have no problem reminding her. So far she has not responded to my note, so I don't really know what her intentions are. I won't have to worry after August because I found out they're all moving out then. woot! wave

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Reply #16 posted 01/12/15 3:37pm

JoeyC

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Pokeno4Money said:

Shyra said:

See. Had this happened from jump street, I would have let them use it without charge. You just can't be nice to "some people," if you get my drift. I guess it's a basic lack of being taught graciousness and common manners. This trend of "getting over" is prevalent and quite disconcerting. Really sad.


Yup, you are 100% right. It really isn't taught anymore, I can't even get a simple "Thank you" from younger relatives when I give them gifts. Those who show their appreciation make me want to give them things and do things for them. Those who don't show appreciation will get less and less from me.


"Why didn't you give me a Valentines Day gift this year Uncle Pokeno?"

"Well my niece, you never thanked me last year so I just assumed you didn't want Valentines gifts anymore." innocent




I agree .

Rest in Peace Bettie Boo. See u soon.
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Reply #17 posted 01/15/15 5:15pm

paintedlady

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Shyra said:

paintedlady said:

I wouldn't do the money stuff...

I would give the neighbors a time line... a week, two weeks what ever you are comfortable with and tell them that they will have to find other accommodations for parking. The reason is your own, and none of their business. You just need the space freed up and they knew the parking restrictions before she acquired 3-4 cars for that household. It is not your problem, don't let them make it your problem, and you are not responsible for their poor planning. Also, keep the conversation/issue to her being parked there now two over months and that you never expected this to become a permanent thing. Her parking there was ONLY a tempoary measure. Keep your tone real business like and have them refer to their management... also inform your neighbors that they have over extended the courtesy you have given them in using your space.

Never haggle over $$$ when you really want them out of your space, because then now you will have to chase them to pay you a fee. It's too much of a headache and those people seem like they aren't very courteous.

Well, it's too late now because I already sent the note telling her she has until February 1 to make up her mind what she wants to do. After that the fee is $6.00 a day. It might get funky if she just ignores me and tries to use it intermittently. I will have no problem reminding her. So far she has not responded to my note, so I don't really know what her intentions are. I won't have to worry after August because I found out they're all moving out then. woot! wave



Oh good!!

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