even if she/he forgives you, the sex won't be the same

too many mixed emotions: anger, guilt, old bad memories, awkardness, etc

think about it

[Edited 10/11/14 13:42pm]

SuperFurryAnimal said:

Good reason for porn. Just spank one out and go to sleep. So much easier than going for std test. Its the truth.

what's a std test?

^^Reassuring question.

JoeTyler said:

SuperFurryAnimal said:

Good reason for porn. Just spank one out and go to sleep. So much easier than going for std test. Its the truth.

what's a std test?

College aptitude test...you should take one.

Revolution said:

JoeTyler said:

what's a std test?

College aptitude test...you should take one.

should I? I finished college in 2010...

Revolution said:

JoeTyler said:

SuperFurryAnimal said:

Good reason for porn. Just spank one out and go to sleep. So much easier than going for std test. Its the truth.

what's a std test?

oh, ok, nevermind

"Sexually transmitted diseases are common, but the types of STD testingyou need may vary by your risk factors. Find out what's recommended ..."

JoeTyler said:

On a serious note sex after cheating is difficult on the one who has been cheated on.... Insecurity is a beast and hard to get over. They will forever have a mental memory of what one did and or didn't do with the next partner. And they will FOREVER wonder how they measure up in one way or another -- did you do this with him -- did you like it better with her, do you miss the way he did this or that etc., It is an ugly dark place.

The good news is that sex can be fantastic after betrayl IF both are willing to do the work... And both partners are willing to be faithful. It's difficult but it can be done.

Revolution said:

nammie said:

On a serious note sex after cheating is difficult on the one who has been cheated on.... Insecurity is a beast and hard to get over. They will forever have a mental memory of what one did and or didn't do with the next partner. And they will FOREVER wonder how they measure up in one way or another -- did you do this with him -- did you like it better with her, do you miss the way he did this or that etc., It is an ugly dark place.

The good news is that sex can be fantastic after betrayl IF both are willing to do the work... And both partners are willing to be faithful. It's difficult but it can be done.

good post

When women start fucking outside of a marriage... many of them have one foot out the door already.

I would add...

Sex usually isn't major thing that changes.. its emotional closeness / intimacy / support.

Nammie & TD3 had some great responses to this.

The emotions won't be what they once were. The person who was cheated on will always feel inferior. And that they will never live up to what the other wants. And knowing he/she was intimate with someone else. When y'all were in a commited relationship. Will fuck with someone on so many levels.

I'm surprised they would even wanna have sex afte that.

The trick IS to get out of your own feelings as a victim of adultry, if you can -- and understand the jump-off is just as insecue as you. Unless, of course the jump-off is gonna be the wifey; then that's a whole different story.

In my personal case the jump-off was just that one of many jump off's and was pretty easy to get over, not because of the amount of women but because of a conversation I had with one of them. And I have never looked back since.

SuperFurryAnimal said:

Good reason for porn. Just spank one out and go to sleep. So much easier than going for std test. Its the truth.

Preach!

KidaDynamite said:

SuperFurryAnimal said:

Good reason for porn. Just spank one out and go to sleep. So much easier than going for std test. Its the truth.

Preach!

it's because of people like you two that hetero night life has become dull, lame and boring

JoeTyler said:

KidaDynamite said:

Preach!

it's because of people like you two that hetero night life has become dull, lame and boring

Well, I know nothing about this "hetero night life" you speak of because I don't partake in it.

But I do know that if you like sleeping around without prtection and don't like getting tested regulary, it's people like YOU who are the reson diseases get passed around without care or caution.

KidaDynamite said:

JoeTyler said:

it's because of people like you two that hetero night life has become dull, lame and boring

Well, I know nothing about this "hetero night life" you speak of because I don't partake in it.

But I do know that if you like sleeping around without prtection and don't like getting tested regulary, it's people like YOU who are the reson diseases get passed around without care or caution.

NO, I criticized the people like you and Superfurry who actually said that it's BETTER to watch porn than doing some std test+ the real thing

It definitely is different.

Whether it's better or worse will depend on the path that the relationship is heading.

NOTHING after cheating is the same.

JoeTyler said:

KidaDynamite said:

Well, I know nothing about this "hetero night life" you speak of because I don't partake in it.

But I do know that if you like sleeping around without prtection and don't like getting tested regulary, it's people like YOU who are the reson diseases get passed around without care or caution.

NO, I criticized the people like you and Superfurry who actually said that it's BETTER to watch porn than doing some std test+ the real thing

Superfurry original post didn't say that porn was better than the real thing. He said that rather than go out and cheat, sit home and watch porn instead and that would be better than having to run to the doctor for and STD test, which it would. So I don't understand your reasoning for the negative criticism.

i guess i've only been 'cheated on' once. which is why i got the heck out of there with the quickness, feeling lucky to go. but, years later, i wonder if monogamy is all it is cracked up to be? i guess not everyone is lucky enough to find their true heart of hearts lover in real life; so what about the couples who have to make do with whomeever they happened to get knocked up by??

long winded point even longer: would it make things okay if the 'cheating' was considered to be 'swinging' instead of cheating? would anyone here be comfortable allowing their partner adulterous encounters outside the marriage/partnership, under the guise of 'swinging'???

Heck no. Monogamy is where it's at. At least, if you want love it is.