Orgtown, EARTH. Very early on a Sunday in March.

What am I doing all awake on a Sunday morning? The sad truth is that Orgtown's nightlife is so dull I went to bed early. It could be that people stayed home in drove to play with their new toy following Haystack's OrgBay auction. After all, why bother going out to buy people drinks when you can buy them? It could also be that people stayed away to comfort Natasha, who is reportedly ill. Get well soon, Nat.

Whatever is chilling the nigthlife, it doesn't seem to affect Bellebeyond, whose Org Recipe booklaunch was a warm and nourishing affair. Wellbeyond was spotted trading poptarts recipes while RdHull explained why homemade pancakes can never top IHOP. Not too far away, Ian was drinking tea while reviewing a few complaints about Aerogram's recent GDology threads. "An acute case of Reportamessagetothemoderatoritis", said the mod between two chuckles.

TheCloud9Mission is back from Portugal after a well-deserved vacation from work. He denied being employed by the American Idol folks to provide backing tracks and "beefing" some key contestants' voices behind a curtain. "Pure lies", shrugged the young musician. That still doesn't explain why he had an advance copy of Kelly Clarkson's upcoming cd.

That reminds me... whatever happened to Bootsinox?
[This message was edited Sun Mar 16 9:56:04 PST 2003 by Aerogram]
[This message was edited Sun Mar 16 11:48:44 PST 2003 by Aerogram]

tee hee hee hee this is cute

More! More!

what and where was

Odd I thought last night was great!

Thank God no-one saw what I was doing last night. It involved chocolate, asphyxiation and a little orange man. I got paid quite a bit of money for it too.

Haystack said:

Same time next week, Mr Stack?

Kim Clarkson's name is actually "Kelly" Clarkson.

luv4u said:

as in...kellyanne mcclure?

luv4u said:

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

Yes it is "Kelly"

Orgtown, EARTH, Almost noon on a friggin Sunday.

TheChronic is allegedly back in town. Just this once, don't read "certainly", because my spies tell me this isn't the original shit stirrer. Just by chance, Icenine was nowhere to be seen during the alleged ressurection.

Dora called last night to say she had done something scandalous enough to deserve a mention in this humble chronicle of the Org's high society. I assured her it was not really shocking if she had a threesome, unless she had it with Aero and Supa. She did mention missing Montreal, where she used to tour Le Gay Village with her queer friends rue St-Catherine and wonder when Montrealers find the time to spleep.

I bumped into Aaronfantastic in the Red district, where I was doing research for my upcoming novel. He told me he had spent the night at Lavish's house. I didn't know she had property in that part of town. "It was fun. Haystack brought chocolate, some rope and an orange jumpsuit very similar to the one Supa wore in Vegas two years ago," said the sometimes temperamental polemist.
[This message was edited Sun Mar 16 11:50:23 PST 2003 by Aerogram]

luv4u said:

My bad... Even Helen Thomas makes mistakes.

Haystack said:

I know what you did. Check my column.

Damn that Aaronfantastic. What a tell-tale.
_____
[This message was edited Sun Mar 16 10:06:20 PST 2003 by Haystack]

Muse2noPharaoh said:

Who did you buy at OrgBay?

Haystack said:

Hey.. it's called a source.

as brilliant as ever Aero... why don't we have a real Orgtown gossiper page on the site, in the style of a tabloid rag... with Aero as the editor who updates it each week!

Aerogram said:

5th :LOL:

ian said:

Damn good idea.

Haystacktried his efforts as a while doing his daily chores this weekend, he has let OrgBay go haywire and has no way of controlling it now, when it goes to page two there is gonna be fighting and death between Orgers.

Following Comic Relief in the UK katt has taken all the charity money and ran way with the goods building her life in the hills of Malaga, she has since opened a cocktail bar called Katt's Rap.

MissCute is sexy as ever and accusing a stir with ALL Orgers, many turing lesbian, many males wanting to be lesbian, so the queues of people signing up for sex change operations is incredible...watch Sky News tonight and see it happening for real...


And The Cat in The Hat does make a come back, although they couldnt find a cat, they found a monkey kicking rubbish on the streets, angry, out of work and frustrated, this monkey better known as JaneyPoos has started writing books for the fucked up people seeking knowledge and quality of life, so is releasing her first best 'predicted' best seller called 'The Cat in The Hat is Really a Twat' selling at all good book stores. She will be signing copies on Tuesday 18th March on Oxford Street, London, at Waterstones from 2pm onwards but please, people with straight-jackets must be accompanied by at least two others..

REDFEATHERS said:

ian said:

It would be an honour. For you guys, I'd even throw in some hot AMP gossip.

In stunning after-hours trading, org legend Aerogram was purchased by a group of foreign investors in an effort to bring pure, unbridled sexual energy into their libindinally-challenged nation. Adam Hussein, Saddam's more hedonistic older brother, was quoted as saying "I can hardly contain myself... I have been masturbating with sheep intestines for days!"

Meanwhile, gossip has it that former chatter, Muse2NOPharaoh, has professed her undying affections for an un-named "mystery man" on the org. Rumor has it that her head has been in such a spin that she has been purchasing food items and walking out before they are prepared, only to have to return to the establishment and sheepishly ask for her merchandise. Close friends have said that she has a sort of "glow" to her, much like the happy sunshine picture that she so loves to post on threads.

In totally unrelated news, WellBeyond is still cool and on point and has been completely non-controversial, but gossip-happy orgers have been murmuring about his covert plans to overthrow the forums with a massive campaign of posts about cheese and bratwurst. Good luck, WellBeyond... you will need it.

Word around the campfire is that org upstart, Haystack, is under investigation for crimes against humanity, illegal insider trading and price gouging in his latest capitalistic venture. Authorities claim that he has artificially inflated the prices on many org personalities and is attempting to sell them into slavery through a mysterious "auction" on the popular Prince fan site, Prince.org.

Hunting season! Rumor has it that the resident org waterfowl, MrBliss, has deactivated himself and has not figured out how to reactivate his account... little does he realize that his posts are still working and he is therefore not deactivated. Some org insiders have stated that he realizes that his account is in working order and is merely trying to fool those who don't realize that you cannot post when your account is deactivated.

NEWSFLASH: Prince is still short and he is still a prick.

In heart-crushing news, resident org basketball fan and borscht lover, BattierBeMyDaddy, has had her application for entrance into the Greater Lexington Community College of Cosmetology and Shine Running denied due to high test scores. It appears that our heroine must start drinking window cleaner in order to lower her intellectual capacity in order to realize her dreams. Good luck, fair Battier...

Word on the street is that the chat room is still filled with miscreants and perverts who constantly talk about "thick, meaty nipples that you could choke on." Careful, chatters... someone could lose an eye.

REDFEATHERS said:

they said i had a stalker but i didnt believe it Get out of my trash cans

REDFEATHERS said:

You are the Hedda to my Lonella. Bravo.

Redfeathers is really lying where this is concerned, she stole the monies herself and started a Lap dancing club in the outer Hebrides for old age pensioners called wrinkly’s. Currently she is working as the main attraction shaking her ass for pension money.

IceNine said:

The OrgTown Gossip is a respectable newspaper, you must be writing for a trashy paper...




Prince is at least 4 foot 10 inches and not a prick at all...

IceNine said:

Though your version of this story is far more tantalizing so more so likely to reach print. The before mentioned food items were left as I was distracted by an annoying phone caller! Who is now fired for teasing the Muse!