Some of my friends are already dreaming to marry .... in our culture is still a girl wants to get married before the age of 25

What for you this best age: for girls and for guys?

[Edited 4/4/13 0:01am]

Hard to say. You certainly need to be an adult. Most of us would say that means not when you reach the legal adult age of 18, but rather when you are an adult in terms of maturity and financial independence.

That comes at different ages for different people.

LiLi1992 said:

Some of my friends are already dreaming to marry .... in our culture is still a girl wants to get married before the age of 25 years.

What for you this best age?

35.

40.

My parents were around that age (either about to turn it or were already over 40) when they finally tied the knot.

35, 40 ...?
Hmm, you guys sure this is the right age for the first marriage?
I mean, the planet Earth will die with these guidelines ...

According to this table, the average age for first marriages in the U.S. is 28.9 (men) 26.9 (women).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_at_first_marriage

I think that for a girl - 22-27 years old, and for a guy - 27-30 years.
but it is approximately and conditionally
to marry when you feel that you need it.

Timmy, it was the first marriage for your parents?

If you want children, do it by the time you're 30.

Getting old sucks and doing it while raising little ones REALLY sucks.

Slave2daGroove said:

If you want children, do it by the time you're 30.

Getting old sucks and doing it while raising little ones REALLY sucks.

Your FIRST marriage?

LiLi1992 said:

35, 40 ...?
Hmm, you guys sure this is the right age for the first marriage?
I mean, the planet Earth will die with these guidelines ...

According to this table, the average age for first marriages in the U.S. is 28.9 (men) 26.9 (women).
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_at_first_marriage

I think that for a girl - 22-27 years old, and for a guy - 27-30 years.
but it is approximately and conditionally
to marry when you feel that you need it.

Timmy, it was the first marriage for your parents?

No.

Timmy84 said:

No.

Well, my mother remarried at 45 and happy.

I mean the first marriage for the purpose of starting a family and having children.
just want to see for myself, to what age is best to plan .... yes, I am a bore, preferring to plan my life.

LiLi1992 said:

Timmy84 said:

No.

Well, my mother remarried at 45 and happy.

I mean the first marriage for the purpose of starting a family and having children.
just want to see for myself, to what age is best to plan .... yes, I am a bore, preferring to plan my life.

I like to plan too, but this is something you really can't plan. Be receptive to love, and let it come when it comes. And it WILL come!

Slave2daGroove said:

Slave2daGroove said:

If you want children, do it by the time you're 30.

Getting old sucks and doing it while raising little ones REALLY sucks.

Your FIRST marriage?

I really enjoyed the quantification as well...

LiLi1992 said:

Some of my friends are already dreaming to marry .... in our culture is still a girl wants to get married before the age of 25 years.

What for you this best age?

[Edited 4/3/13 10:42am]

None.

Until further notice, I will never, EVER get married.

And I'm not just saying that because I'm a happily single black male. It's also because marriage is a business arrangement. If the marriage last until death due the couple apart, it's a success. But if OR when the marriage fails and ends in a divorce, then the man can AND/OR will potentially lose half (or more) of whatever he has, in addition of having to deal with overprice child support payments for each biological child that were produced from that union.

Motherf*** all of THAT!!!!^

I was not ready for marriage in my 20's, I know that.

I don't want kids, though, so no rush to settle down.

I think anything under 25 is a little too early in general, but there are certainly people who are happily married that got married much younger, so it really all depends.

In your 30s - which is most definitely not too old to start having children.

Use your 20s to live for you and you only.

I'm curious what culture it is you're talking about....?

JustErin said:

In your 30s - which is most definitely not too old to start having children.

Use your 20s to live for you and you only.

I'm curious what culture it is you're talking about....?

Eastern Europe, the former Soviet states
we have traditionally encouraged early marriage.
unmarried girl 25 years old is suspect and often condemned.

average age of marriage we have the lowest in Europe
Moldova 25.8 (men) 23.0 (women)
Russia 26.1 (men) 23.3 (women)
Ukraine 25.9 (men) 23.1 (women)

half of my female friends married (and it is 21-22).
I consider myself a young, almost a child at heart, do not know if I will maturation for marriage, even in 25.

so I'm wondering what the optimal age for the first marriage for you ... not too early and not too late.

TonyVanDam said:

LiLi1992 said:

Some of my friends are already dreaming to marry .... in our culture is still a girl wants to get married before the age of 25 years.

What for you this best age?

[Edited 4/3/13 10:42am]

None.

Until further notice, I will never, EVER get married.

And I'm not just saying that because I'm a happily single black male. It's also because marriage is a business arrangement. If the marriage last until death due the couple apart, it's a success. But if OR when the marriage fails and ends in a divorce, then the man can AND/OR will potentially lose half (or more) of whatever he has, in addition of having to deal with overprice child support payments for each biological child that were produced from that union.

Motherf*** all of THAT!!!!^

If you really think that child support is "overpriced" you really are pretty ignorant. I can guarantee that if the relationship did NOT fail he would actually be paying much more when it comes to raising his children.

Child support is the minimum and I do mean minimum amount of support a child requires in terms of the costs involved with raising them - relative to the income of the one paying the support.

Most parents do everything to provide the absolute best they can for their kids. I will never understand the mentality that many men have that an end of a relationship with a woman somehow means that their children suddenly deserve less from them.

Also marriage has nothing to do with child support.

TonyVanDam said:

LiLi1992 said:

Some of my friends are already dreaming to marry .... in our culture is still a girl wants to get married before the age of 25 years.

What for you this best age?

[Edited 4/3/13 10:42am]

None.

Until further notice, I will never, EVER get married.

And I'm not just saying that because I'm a happily single black male. It's also because marriage is a business arrangement. If the marriage last until death due the couple apart, it's a success. But if OR when the marriage fails and ends in a divorce, then the man can AND/OR will potentially lose half (or more) of whatever he has, in addition of having to deal with overprice child support payments for each biological child that were produced from that union.

Motherf*** all of THAT!!!!^

if (heaven forbid) my marriage broke down, i'd want to do whatever is humanly possible to support my children

LiLi1992 said:

JustErin said:

In your 30s - which is most definitely not too old to start having children.

Use your 20s to live for you and you only.

I'm curious what culture it is you're talking about....?

Eastern Europe, the former Soviet states
we have traditionally encouraged early marriage.
unmarried girl 25 years old is suspect and often condemned.

average age of marriage we have the lowest in Europe
Moldova 25.8 (men) 23.0 (women)
Russia 26.1 (men) 23.3 (women)
Ukraine 25.9 (men) 23.1 (women)

half of my female friends married (and it is 21-22).
I consider myself a young, almost a child at heart, do not know if I will maturation for marriage, even in 25.

so I'm wondering what the optimal age for the first marriage for you ... not too early and not too late.

Marriage is really not important or necessary to me, so it is not a priority nor something I desire.

But....if I were to marry, it wouldn't be about it being my first marriage it would be about my only marriage so I would be more than damn sure it was exactly what I wanted before doing it.

• Get an education.
• Get a really good job.
• Travel and do the things you want to do before you settle down.
• Make sure person has a good job with a future.
• Don't marry a bum.
• Wait till you are in your 30's 40's to get married.

Make sure you get a good education and get a good job after. That way you can be independant and if your marriage ends, at least you won't have to be depending on a man or be a financial mess with not much money to live on.

So what's the rush to get married?

JustErin said:

If you really think that child support is "overpriced" you really are pretty ignorant. I can guarantee that if the relationship did NOT fail he would actually be paying much more when it comes to raising his children.

Child support is the minimum and I do mean minimum amount of support a child requires in terms of the costs involved with raising them - relative to the income of the one paying the support.

Most parents do everything to provide the absolute best they can for their kids. I will never understand the mentality that many men have that an end of a relationship with a woman somehow means that their children suddenly deserve less from them.

Also marriage has nothing to do with child support.

That is so true. The previous abusive ex took me to court 4 times just to get the child support reduced. And he succeeded even though he could of paid what was ordered. Oh yeah, told the judge he loves the kids, yeah right

I had a full-time job. I never wanted the child support (it's mandatory according to law). To me his money is dirty money.

He only did that because as controlling as he likes to be, in his mind the child support was being taken from me, his way of getting back at me. The dumbass has no idea that it's to raise the kids. But money is his god.

i got married at 35 (my wife was 25)... we've been married nearly 10 years... now i'm in my 40s and have 2 very young children... it is what it is... the only thing that i struggle with at times is the sleep deprivation... i don't drink/smoke/do any drugs, and i keep fit... it's important that i'm around a long time for my kids

i was engaged at 22, to an 18 year old (fox)... one morning she corrected me on how i spread the peanut butter on my toast, so i called the wedding off... i'm glad i did

i'm glad i didn't get married young as i didn't have my shit together til my early 30s... so my answer to the question is "when you have your shit together"

I'ma say 27, 28, 29, around then. By your early 30s you'll have figured a few things out and will be ready to have kids. Different strokes for different folks though. It's made no major difference to my life marrying at the age I did compared to 5 years earlier or later.

75

luv4u said:

vainandy said:

75

I think you're obviously childfree.

I agree with all those who said that it is necessary to have an education, you need to be independent, to have time to see and feel something, to live freely and enjoy this freedom.

but still, if a woman wants to have children, her reproductive abilities are not endless

I got married when I was 18 and my husband was 22. I don't recommend it. I would say late 20s is a good age. I'm 40 now, and we are still married. We stuck it out through a lot of rough stuff. I was basically a kid when we married and he was very immature for a long time. Now our kids are 16, 17 and 20. We're still kind of young and are really enjoying our freedom. We make good money, do whatever we want without worrying about who is going to watch the kids.

vainandy said:

75

benefit hunter...