missfee said:

Okay so I watched it...my thoughts:

I think it started off well but when Iyanla was trying to get to the root of things, X balked and refused to go further. Wasn't surprising to me since I saw him do that on that Couples reality show on VH1. He wants to cry and tell the world how he's hurt, and yes that man is definitely walking around with hurt and pain in soul, but he NEVER wants to own up to his contribution to the pain he holds inside as well as the pain he unleashes out on others close to him who love him and obviously want to see him do better. Instead of forgiving who wronged him in the past and letting that mess go, he CHOOSES to hold on to it and it seems like, disturbingly, he WANTS to hold on to it to give him an excuse to keep getting high.

Now as far as him wanting to walk away from the show, what did he expect when he AGREED to participate in it in the first place? We know that he said he agreed to do the show to get help about his addiction to women, but really, did he think he was going to be made to look like the victim? Did he actually think that he was going to be shown in a good light? I don't get it. How was the show going to portray he has positive qualities overall if he can't even confront the mistakes he made in life and most importantly, OWN up to them?

Now on to his son...lawd this was so sad. His son seems to have a really good head on his shoulders. His mother was correct, he is DMX without the drugs. He's exactly that. Emotional just like him, intelligent, the whole thing. I was glad he was able to have a breakthrough of his own with Iyanla but in trying to talk to his father, in a way, I could see how DMX was getting irritated when she kept interrupting to translate or gage the conversation. It works better to just let two people hash it out. I understand why she kept engaging in their conversation because she wanted to be sure Xavier got his point across clearly to his father and not back down, but when DMX flew into that rage and literally cursed Iyanla out, that would had been it for me. Shut down the production get his ass off my show. I can't deal with totally disrespectful people. But anywho, when she finally let them talk, I think it was great, they finally got things cleared up, HOWEVER, at the end when Xavier told his father that he wanted a relationship with him only if he got clean and DMX shut him down and said no, I was taken aback. Wow. So he's going to put drugs over having a great relationship with his son, that was really shitty. Then, to rub salt in the wound he gets up and says "so I guess the next time you'll see me is when I'm dead, so get up and give me a hug" What in the hell? How do you say that to your own child like that?

It's crystal clear that DMX is very smart, he's no dummy for sure, but he could be so much more without all the poison of drugs, the wallowing in his pain and constant denial of how he contributes to pain he wallows in. Like I said before, some people just can't be helped and he's one of them. It just seems like he refuses to realize the damage he's doing not only to himself, but to the ones who really love him.

[Edited 4/14/13 14:24pm]

Great lesson from this show:

* His ex-wife sold her soul for 24 years.

Thankfully, she saw the light, showed her children that it is not okay to have anybody treat you that bad, and she left him.

* She believed her own farytale that she could change DMX and

would get his love and money in return.

I'm so happy she finally realized that was just her own imagination.

Now that she realizes that she is worthy of love, and not to be disrespected,

she can walk into the light and have a good life.

* Xavier understands that his father DMX is very sick and mentally ill.

Despite this knowledge, he wants to have a healthy relationship with his father.

When he realizes that his father does not want to be healthy,

he might accept that an adult healthy father-son relationship is impossible.

* Xavier can't (at this point in his life) have a relationship with his father the way he would like.

Maybe in due time, Xavier will be able to accept that his father is who he is and does not want to become healthy.

Then they might be able to see eachother and love eachother unconditionally.

Xavier needs to come to turns with that fact that he is healthy, willing to learn and grow,

but that his father is suffering from a mental disease and various addictions, not willing to reflect on himself.

* The people who love DMX and who have self respect can see clearly now that they are not in the position to decide for DMX how to life.

They can unconditionally love him, knowing that means that he will hurt them when they have contact with him. Or they can love him from a distance, in order to protect themself from his hurtful behaviour.

* DMX wants to be addicted to alcohol, cigarettes, weed, cocaine, sex, women's attention, and false positive compliments.

He wants to stay in the victim role

in stead of

be a real man who own up to his own behaviour.

* Everybody has the right to choose the path of his his/her life.

DMX wants to be aggressive, intimidating, addicted and hurtful to his loved ones.

Let him.

That is who he wants to be.

* The people around DMX who support his destructive behaviour and enable him to hurt himself and others, are responsible for the consequences of their own choices.

If they stay in a relationship with him or take a job that enables him to be self-destructive, they choose the path of keeping him in this condition.

A true friend will not accept him to behave like this. Only people who care for the money will stay around him to make sure they enable his distruction.

* A lot of people think they help by making excuses for somebody to behave badly.

You only help people if you allow them to face the consequences of their own behaviour.