So...I'm watching Independence Day (yeah...Will Smith's fist is faster than the alien's telepathic brain attack...ok)...and I was thinking that this interstellar-traveling race whose technology is leaps & bounds more advanced than ours apparently must have the worst I.T. department in the universe, since they have no concept of a firewall, and a virus to disable their offensive capabilities can be hacked in through an 8MB Mac PowerBook.

EPIC FAIL; I.T. DEPARTMENT

But let's see how other races have fared;

The Borg

Super-advanced "hive mind" cybernetic race.

With the assimilation of Captain Picard, one Borg Cube managed to lay wast to a whole armada of Federation and Klingon ships.

BUT...remove a Borg from the collective and he/she/it becomes useless.

And apparently a captured Borg can be uploaded with a virus.

Doesn't ANYONE believe in Firewalls?

EPIC FAIL; HIVE MIND

The Great Evil

SO this sentient, impenetrable, telepathic ball of pure evil that appears every 5,000 years can swallow missiles like tic-tacs and can make people's brains bleed from tens of thousands of miles away...but can't seem to communicate without a telephone and most importantly can't pick on another planet to consume other than the one where there's four magical rocks that make Milla Jovovich vomit some crazy light that turns it into a dead moon (surprisingly like the one already in orbit around us)...don't these things learn their lesson???

EPIC FAIL; PHOTOSENSITIVITY

The Goa'uld

Ancient race of symbiotes with a God complex.

They were the dominant species in the galaxy for thousands of years, with a vast empire and advanced technology.

But...uhm...they're just parasites and need a human body.

EPIC FAIL; BIOLOGY

And of course, how can we forget;

A galactic empire spearheaded by the Dark Lord of the Sith.

Yet...a moisture farmer from a backwater planet manages to FLY HIS SPACESHIP into the core of the most powerful Weapon of Mass Destruction the universe has ever seen.

EPIC FAIL; ENGINEERING

PurpleJedi said:

And of course, how can we forget;

A galactic empire spearheaded by the Dark Lord of the Sith.

Yet...a moisture farmer from a backwater planet manages to FLY HIS SPACESHIP into the core of the most powerful Weapon of Mass Destruction the universe has ever seen.

EPIC FAIL; ENGINEERING

But he was the Son of a Sith, thats got to count for something

sunflower7 said:

Damn Purp.. I thought U were kidding when u said u would do this.. Leave the aliens alone.. when they do come all of ur hang ups will be quenched. But then it will be to late. That's when you will hope that a bucket of water will be your solution( swing purp.. swing). Until then bask in ignorance like the rest of us do..

How could I forget THEM!!!???

Smart enough to built interstellar spacecraft with cloaking technology...

...but NOT smart enough to open a pantry door.

...OR put on a wetsuit.

EPIC FAIL; DISINGENUITY

FragileUndertow said:

PurpleJedi said:

And of course, how can we forget;

A galactic empire spearheaded by the Dark Lord of the Sith.

Yet...a moisture farmer from a backwater planet manages to FLY HIS SPACESHIP into the core of the most powerful Weapon of Mass Destruction the universe has ever seen.

EPIC FAIL; ENGINEERING

But he was the Son of a Sith, thats got to count for something

Yeah, and podracing was in his genes.

Still.

Can we build one or two chain-link fences inside any future WMD's that are prone to attack? I mean, he FLEW a damned X-Wing fighter into the damned thing!

morningsong said:

I don't think anyone built firewalls until there was an actual attack, therefore we can assume those aliens had never encountered a devious of species as us earthly, we hack your stuff. Oh, and the Gould stole most of their technology mostly from the Ancients so they're not a bunch of geniuses, they are probably the universes best hijackers.

...so Apple and Hackers will ensure the perpetuation of the human race!

Oh, and I missed the whole "Ancient Ones" storyline in the Stargate series.

You dissed the Borg?!

She is one of the coolest creatures EVER!!!!

morningsong said:

I don't think anyone built firewalls until there was an actual attack, therefore we can assume those aliens had never encountered a devious of species as us earthly, we hack your stuff. Oh, and the Gould stole most of their technology mostly from the Ancients so they're not a bunch of geniuses, they are probably the universes best hijackers.

...so Apple and Hackers will ensure the perpetuation of the human race!

morningsong said:

PurpleJedi said:

Oh, and I missed the whole "Ancient Ones" storyline in the Stargate series.

The Ancients built the Stargates. You missed a lot. Atlantis nor Universe would make sense without them.

I should probably get the series on DVD...

I don't think I ever saw all of Independence Day, but I saw the end.

Apparently pilots can fly anything, simply by declaring that they are pilots and they can fly it.

And the hacking thing extends way beyond Sci Fi. Every movie now is like "see if you can get into the traffic light cameras" and "see if you can get into the FBI's closed circuit network" before the sentence is finished the guy says "I'm in!"

NDRU said:

I don't think I ever saw all of Independence Day, but I saw the end.

Apparently pilots can fly anything, simply by declaring that they are pilots and they can fly it.

And the hacking thing extends way beyond Sci Fi. Every movie now is like "see if you can get into the traffic light cameras" and "see if you can get into the FBI's closed circuit network" before the sentence is finished the guy says "I'm in!"

The Borg started out pretty damn cool in the first 3 episodes they were in. Then they got turned into that hive one mind collective queen bee BS.

The Borg are everything but lame. They are actually a very well though-out race with absolutely no lapses in logical congruity.

Apart from that, the way they represent functioning communism/dictatorship is really mind-bending.

They really are a wonderfully intelligent creation; I suggest you take a closer look at them!

PurpleJedi said:

Dave1992 said:

The Borg are everything but lame. They are actually a very well though-out race with absolutely no lapses in logical congruity.

Apart from that, the way they represent functioning communism/dictatorship is really mind-bending.

They really are a wonderfully intelligent creation; I suggest you take a closer look at them!

Yes, the Borg are a very creative invention.

The fact that they are defeatable is the point. They appear to be invincible at first, but in fact there are serious weakness in thier society's design. Star Trek always does this, because they want to show the virtue and strength of their vision of humanity's future.

I did not love the hive queen, though, as it kind of went against the nature of the borg to have someone acting as an individual.

of COURSE humankind will defeat evildoers every time. and why?

OPPOSABLE THUMBS, BABY!!!! OPPOSABLE THUMBS!!!!!!

morningsong said:

PurpleJedi said:

I should probably get the series on DVD...

Yeah, when you're not too busy raising your children or making a life for yourself. It's a lot of watching. It would be interesting your opinion on the Wraith if you get that far.

I'll look into it. I caught ONE episode of Stargate: Atlantis and saw a Wraith...but I was so out of the loop that I changed channels midway.

NDRU said:

Dave1992 said:

The Borg are everything but lame. They are actually a very well though-out race with absolutely no lapses in logical congruity.

Apart from that, the way they represent functioning communism/dictatorship is really mind-bending.

They really are a wonderfully intelligent creation; I suggest you take a closer look at them!

Yes, the Borg are a very creative invention.

The fact that they are defeatable is the point. They appear to be invincible at first, but in fact there are serious weakness in thier society's design. Star Trek always does this, because they want to show the virtue and strength of their vision of humanity's future.

I did not love the hive queen, though, as it kind of went against the nature of the borg to have someone acting as an individual.

When Q introduced the Enterprise to the Borg, I really got into the concept of the Borg being this nearly-invincible threat to humanity.

Then that episode with the captured teenage borg where they want to download a virus and re-introduce him into the hive kind'a made me SMH.

Wouldn't an advanced species whose very existence depends on uploading "data" have an ultra-sophisticated Norton in place?

XxAxX said:

of COURSE humankind will defeat evildoers every time. and why?

OPPOSABLE THUMBS, BABY!!!! OPPOSABLE THUMBS!!!!!!

...and HACKERS!!!

nothing will ever be as dumb as the ones from "signs"

m. night shyalaman is an idiot writer.

PurpleJedi said:

sunflower7 said:

Damn Purp.. I thought U were kidding when u said u would do this.. Leave the aliens alone.. when they do come all of ur hang ups will be quenched. But then it will be to late. That's when you will hope that a bucket of water will be your solution( swing purp.. swing). Until then bask in ignorance like the rest of us do..

How could I forget THEM!!!???

Smart enough to built interstellar spacecraft with cloaking technology...

...but NOT smart enough to open a pantry door.

...OR put on a wetsuit.

EPIC FAIL; DISINGENUITY

exactly.

Shit the borg is bad ass. For lamest Sci-Fi Villians of all time would have to be the aliens from Battlefield Earth, don't know the name of them except they are just lame.

kpowers said:

Shit the borg is bad ass. For lamest Sci-Fi Villians of all time would have to be the aliens from Battlefield Earth, don't know the name of them except they are just lame.

I don't even REMEMBER that movie (even though I watched it).

So I can't comment.

kpowers said:

Shit the borg is bad ass. For lamest Sci-Fi Villians of all time would have to be the aliens from Battlefield Earth, don't know the name of them except they are just lame.

oh, god. them too

cborgman said:

kpowers said:

Shit the borg is bad ass. For lamest Sci-Fi Villians of all time would have to be the aliens from Battlefield Earth, don't know the name of them except they are just lame.

oh, god. them too

Besides the movie being a POS...remind me again why the alien race was so lame???

PurpleJedi said:

cborgman said:

oh, god. them too

Besides the movie being a POS...remind me again why the alien race was so lame???

They are really Ferengi on steroids

PurpleJedi said:

XxAxX said:

of COURSE humankind will defeat evildoers every time. and why?

OPPOSABLE THUMBS, BABY!!!! OPPOSABLE THUMBS!!!!!!

...and HACKERS!!!

[Edited 2/4/13 16:55pm]

PurpleJedi said:

The Borg

Stopped reading. Post failed. The end.

Cerebus said:

PurpleJedi said:

The Borg

Stopped reading. Post failed. The end.

You'll keep reading.

Resistance is futile.