I did some sleuthing on (i.e. "googled") a woman who has been flirting with me a lot recently. It's all very innocent, but I was really flattered nontheless...until I saw a picture of her and her now deceased husband on facebook. Let's just say that he wasn't quite G.Q. material. Suddenly, the attention I've been getting from her doesn't seem so special and I'm not even as attracted to her, eventhough she's very nice looking herself.

Have any of you ever been turned off solely by someone's taste in other people? Or am I just shallow and vain?

perhaps he had plenty of lolly, he obviously had something to offer! she might have been left a tidy sum.

i went out with a couple of ugly boys back in the day.. they were & are still fucking LOADED

if she's nice looking & wants some love then don't deny her 4 gods sake man!!

[Edited 11/29/12 23:52pm]

Yeah, I'd say that's pretty empty

How does what her late husband look like have anything to do with you?

[Edited 11/30/12 5:50am]

Women are known to not be lead by the looks department

so this should be no slight to you

OldFriends4Sale said:

Women are known to not be lead by the looks department

so this should be no slight to you

Who told you that??

Anyhoo, I can't think of anyone that I have been interested in that dated someone that I would consider really unattractive - it's usually quite the opposite, but if I did...I don't think it would make me less attracted to them. I'm not really getting why it would?

To answer your last question first.

Yes, you are being shallow and vain and you should try to get over yourself.

To answering your second question.

No, I never judge my friends potential mates, lovers, or significant others based on their looks. I'll admit I've sometimes been surprised upon the initial meeting of some of my friends partners because of the way they've gushed and described them; your imagination has a tendency to see (for a lack of a better work) traditional beauty or pretty. But within minutes of meeting them I can see why they are special and gorgeous to my friend(s).

Maybe he had a lot of money and a massive wang.

This is like the Seinfeld episode where Jerry was turned off by his girl because she dated Newman(!)

But to answer your question, "yes" I've had the same reaction before. And yes, it is a little shalow, but comically so.

Seems like you'd be happy she was trading up.

Ottensen said:

Yeah, I'd say that's pretty empty

Yup.

CarrieMpls said:

Ottensen said:

Yeah, I'd say that's pretty empty

Yup.

Yeah

I clicked here to see why a woman would be turned off by an unattractive husband. I mean the fool married him, but it turns out you're turned off by someone else's husband. Wow!

I think that I "get it" (what xpertluva is feeling)...

...it's like he was feeling the attention from this attractive person, then finds out that her late husband was fugly, so now he is feeling like he "shares" attributes with the deceased troll by virtue of the fact that both of them got the attention of this same lady.

...OR...the fact that she married an ogre suddenly lowered her "hotness" factor and now perhaps she's no longer in his/your "league".

At least, that's my interpretation of the situation.

To answer the question;

1) yes, you're being shallow

2) no, never been turned off by a previous partner who was a frankenstein. Just the opposite actually.

haha, and I thought I was shallow. I never even thought about this.

But what if another ex of her is dropdead gorgous?

do her a favor and dump her before you begin dating

I am constantly puzzled by why woman find me attractive , yet some do . I just think you could have worse problems than a woman flirting with you . Maybe she just really loved her husband outside of his looks. You, on the other hand, may physically be more of her type.

Tittypants said:

I am constantly puzzled by why woman find me attractive , yet some do . I just think you could have worse problems than a woman flirting with you . Maybe she just really loved her husband outside of his looks. You, on the other hand, may physically be more of her type.

I'm puzzled why you would say this.

Stymie said:

Tittypants said:

I am constantly puzzled by why woman find me attractive , yet some do . I just think you could have worse problems than a woman flirting with you . Maybe she just really loved her husband outside of his looks. You, on the other hand, may physically be more of her type.

I'm puzzled why you would say this.

Because I'm just okay, I'm nothing special or anything imo . My point is that we never know who's going to find any of us attractive. I'm not complaining about women being attracted to me @ all.

JustErin said:

OldFriends4Sale said:

Women are known to not be lead by the looks department

so this should be no slight to you

Who told you that??

Anyhoo, I can't think of anyone that I have been interested in that dated someone that I would consider really unattractive - it's usually quite the opposite, but if I did...I don't think it would make me less attracted to them. I'm not really getting why it would?

lol as I said known to not lead with the looks

that's why will see a fine woman with a plain or ugly guy

look at most Supermodels and the men they marry

but you will never see a good looking guy with a not so attractive woman unless he has security issues

Women seem to go by a lot more than just looks. I didn't say they don't go by looks, of course they do

A progressive woman will mostly look at many other things about a goodlooking man working at McDonalds, vs a progressive man who will mostly look at a goodlooking womans looks who works at McDonalds

lol even women judge women by their looks

[Edited 11/30/12 10:53am]

Stymie said:

Tittypants said:

I am constantly puzzled by why woman find me attractive , yet some do . I just think you could have worse problems than a woman flirting with you . Maybe she just really loved her husband outside of his looks. You, on the other hand, may physically be more of her type.

I'm puzzled why you would say this.

If you actually saw him you would be even more puzzled at why he's saying this.

KidaDynamite said:

Stymie said:

I'm puzzled why you would say this.

If you actually saw him you would be even more puzzled at why he's saying this.

The hot ones always think they're average or just "okay".

Stymie said:

Seems like you'd be happy she was trading up.

This.

....oh, and I seen fugly men date hot women because they were hung. Its the same reason a guy fucks a butta-face.

.....OR maybe its that "ol skool" thing where a man doesn't want to know about any ex a woman had because he doesn't want to picture any other guy "messing up her coochie" but him.

I have dated men that could not handle knowing any information about my exes, it would turn them off.

When my husband and I got engaged, we went back to New York because the people who set us up wanted to throw use a party. Amongst the group was a guy who was a mutual friend of our friends who was always invited to our gatherings. Long story short...

We were at the bar drinking and having great time and this man comes up to Habbo and said, "You are marrying that." Habbo hit him and nocked him out. I got in Habbo butt because - a) it wasn't serious nor anything to engage in fisticuffs and b) he hadn't long been granted citizenship. Later on he apologized to Habbo and I; I accepted his apology but Habbo told him him to fuck off.

-----------------

[Edited 11/30/12 12:32pm]

paintedlady said:

ZombieKitten said:

paintedlady said:

.....OR maybe its that "ol skool" thing where a man doesn't want to know about any ex a woman had because he doesn't want to picture any other guy "messing up her coochie" but him.

I have dated men that could not handle knowing any information about my exes, it would turn them off.

Is this anything to do with people that believe a woman's vagina becomes loose with many partners? Hang on, even the term she's loose implies that

I was aiming at him visualizing her ex and him having sex now that he knows what the ex looks like.... but yes, the "looseness" theory also comes into play.

No one stays the same, maybe her taste in men or preference changed, and her being with someone that reminds her of him would be too sad or not what she's looking for at this stage.

You're shallow and vain.