I don't know anymore wtf my pills (mood stabilizers) are doing for me or to me....I get really agitated and urges to scream and bang which I do when tired, or I can't shut up and have to always be saying something even if I look like a fool or not make sense, and family is trying to suggest maybe I should wean off them and have suggested on and off. And of course I go either really hyper/psychotic or really quiet and low....psychiatrist thinks I should just continue them without stopping, I don't know anymore....I'm just worried I'll go into crisis like before if I stop, especially after seeing what happened to a relative that weaned off her dozens of meds earlier in the year.

In a lot of areas I'm doing better, but find it hard to live in the moment though maybe it's more manageable and there's no need for the pills, but the reason I need them is cause of a bad relapse followed by bad events

I don't think I'm self-medicating but sometimes I wondered if I was though I couldn't have been if weaning off them failed before.....

I'm just a fucking drug addict now :*( and it's all cause I can't handle feelings

How long have you been on them?

Ace said:

How long have you been on them?

3 years for this one, and have been struggling more or less the entire time trying to seek another solution, but nothing was working...the closest thing that worked was a little bit of hypnotherapy but that's too expensive to keep going back for....and talking to a therapist that doesn't prescribe, though he suggested I stick with them too

[Edited 10/30/12 7:19am]

u should try medical marajuana

kiasheri said:

u should try medical marajuana

joke about that all the time but I saw what it did to someone with a combination of other things and I'm really afraid of all types of drugs...I didn't even want to be medicated, after my breakdown 3 years ago and a hospitalization, they made me, all cause they thought I was going to kill myself and appeared high as a kite out of mania and told them I'm not going to do it though I was so afraid of my constant thoughts cause of the stress at the time

Judging by the consequences my sister-in-law had when she went off her depression meds, I would strongly advise that you not go off them without seeing your doctor first.

If you don't liek what that doctor says, see another. If they both agree, listen to them.

Good luck and be careful.

alphastreet said:

kiasheri said:

u should try medical marajuana

joke about that all the time but I saw what it did to someone with a combination of other things and I'm really afraid of all types of drugs...I didn't even want to be medicated, after my breakdown 3 years ago and a hospitalization, they made me, all cause they thought I was going to kill myself and appeared high as a kite out of mania and told them I'm not going to do it though I was so afraid of my constant thoughts cause of the stress at the time

Please do not take that advice unless a doctor you trust tells you to do it.

kiasheri said:

u should try medical marajuana

Agreed.

It actually can really help with conditions like yours. Talk to your doctor about it.

RodeoSchro said:

Judging by the consequences my sister-in-law had when she went off her depression meds, I would strongly advise that you not go off them without seeing your doctor first.

If you don't liek what that doctor says, see another. If they both agree, listen to them.

Good luck and be careful.

I think my psychiatrist is a quack that secretly wants to kill me, he already made a mistake with me years ago and I called him out for it, then he tried to give me something I didn't want/need and I called him out for it. Tried to switch to another one, he was even worse and very rude and disrespectful in general, so I just talked to the therapist and kept getting refills.

don't worry rodeo, I'm staying far away from alcohol and smoking, although sometimes I just want to numb away how I feel and empathize with those who actually do it...I know I could not stick to it socially cause I have addictive traits, so I just end up having comfort food, like a warm drink, and music does not make me high like before though I still like it, it's really changed and it is what it is, I have other ways to entertain myself

JustErin said:

kiasheri said:

u should try medical marajuana

Agreed.

It actually can really help with conditions like yours. Talk to your doctor about it.

I wonder if I could get it in pill form, I can't really stand smoke though I did do some of it in the late 90's and could tolerate it better than a regular cigarette....but I think my real problem is not being understood for the deeper emotions and all the things I use to mask them. Not to sound like an emo child or anything, but only my notebook and people online going through similar struggles can understand some of it. The friends I have who deal with this type of thing had some kind of injury that brought it on, and I did have a minor one that I believe could triggered it too, but I think emotional pain that already existed made me more sensitive though I was hurt, and getting that out will help me if I can find the right professional though I think this is beyond professional help and too much of a buildup

[Edited 10/30/12 7:40am]

alphastreet said:

JustErin said:

Agreed.

It actually can really help with conditions like yours. Talk to your doctor about it.

I wonder if I could get it in pill form, I can't really stand smoke though I did do some of it in the late 90's and could tolerate it better than a regular cigarette....but I think my real problem is not being understood for the deeper emotions and all the things I use to mask them. Not to sound like an emo child or anything, but only my notebook and people online going through similar struggles can understand some of it. The friends I have who deal with this type of thing had some kind of injury that brought it on, and I did have a minor one that I believe could triggered it too, but I think emotional pain that already existed made me more sensitive though I was hurt, and getting that out will help me if I can find the right professional though I think this is beyond professional help and too much of a buildup

[Edited 10/30/12 7:40am]

You don't have to smoke it. You can use a vaporizor.

But yes, you can take medication to calm you down or help with a chemical imbalance but unless you deal with what is triggering all this, you'll never really be able to really get "better".

I would stay away from the psychiatrists and stick with cognitive therapy.

JustErin said:

alphastreet said:

I wonder if I could get it in pill form, I can't really stand smoke though I did do some of it in the late 90's and could tolerate it better than a regular cigarette....but I think my real problem is not being understood for the deeper emotions and all the things I use to mask them. Not to sound like an emo child or anything, but only my notebook and people online going through similar struggles can understand some of it. The friends I have who deal with this type of thing had some kind of injury that brought it on, and I did have a minor one that I believe could triggered it too, but I think emotional pain that already existed made me more sensitive though I was hurt, and getting that out will help me if I can find the right professional though I think this is beyond professional help and too much of a buildup

[Edited 10/30/12 7:40am]

You don't have to smoke it. You can use a vaporizor.

But yes, you can take medication to calm you down or help with a chemical imbalance but unless you deal with what is triggering all this, you'll never really be able to really get "better".

I would stay away from the psychiatrists and stick with cognitive therapy.

we're all from the same province, I keep asking for CBT and they don't want to give it to me, when I did day treatment they said bits of it are in there, and I have that mind over mood book...some of hypnotherapy reminded me of it too but only a little

There are many ways to take Mary Jane. You can make up some cakes or mix it with all kinds of recipes if you don't like to smoke. I've been smoking it heavily for more than half my life and though it can help some people, and does, I wouldn't recommend it if you're not keen on staying medicated on anything. Marijuana can seriously fuck with your head and could be detrimental. Could help though, depending on the individual.

Prescription drugs for depression, depending on how severely you suffer, can be the only thing to help you out. If you were hospitalised in the past you'll already know that you could well still be there had it not been for the meds. That said, I don't agree with the continuous use of meds (Speaking as someone that may as well have a loyalty card at the Chemists). Obviously, at times when there's a chemical imbalance then you'll need to take the meds but I think when you're feeling better, starting to get on, you should try to wean yourself (And the Doctors) away from continuous use. You shouldn't stop any meds you've been given without seeing what's what with the Doc first.

You're better trying to deal with the problem at source if you can. Talk is cheap. Any meds you'll be given will only serve to mask the problem but sometimes that's all there is to do. Like I said, if it's a chemical inbalance then meds are often the only option.

Good luck anyway, smiler. Life's a short shit eh.

Fonkyman said:

There are many ways to take Mary Jane. You can make up some cakes or mix it with all kinds of recipes if you don't like to smoke. I've been smoking it heavily for more than half my life and though it can help some people, and does, I wouldn't recommend it if you're not keen on staying medicated on anything. Marijuana can seriously fuck with your head and could be detrimental. Could help though, depending on the individual.

Prescription drugs for depression, depending on how severely you suffer, can be the only thing to help you out. If you were hospitalised in the past you'll already know that you could well still be there had it not been for the meds. That said, I don't agree with the continuous use of meds (Speaking as someone that may as well have a loyalty card at the Chemists). Obviously, at times when there's a chemical imbalance then you'll need to take the meds but I think when you're feeling better, starting to get on, you should try to wean yourself (And the Doctors) away from continuous use. You shouldn't stop any meds you've been given without seeing what's what with the Doc first.

You're better trying to deal with the problem at source if you can. Talk is cheap. Any meds you'll be given will only serve to mask the problem but sometimes that's all there is to do. Like I said, if it's a chemical inbalance then meds are often the only option.

Good luck anyway, smiler. Life's a short shit eh.

yeah my mind's already fucked, and I'm bipolar, they misdiagnosed me with depression years before and those meds fucked me up big time though they said I could slowly wean off them, and I got bad before I got better, and then really got bad over time, was in denial, had some physical and emotional triggers take place and finally I snapped and that lasted for months before I ended up admitting myself

I don't want mine to be a short shit like these people want, I want them to understand my real issues and how I use things around me as a distraction to mask feelings, and how it's not benefitting me anymore, but it's all I've known.....

Fonky prescription:

Take full contents of Parade, SOTT and Lovesexy twice daily, with or after food. May drive machinery, may drink alcohol, patient may grin inanely. Consult Dr. Fonks if symptoms persist.

[Edited 10/30/12 8:41am]

alphastreet said:

yeah my mind's already fucked, and I'm bipolar,

My mind's fucked too and I think I might be from Bipolar as well? They always told me I was born in London but Bipolar makes more sense to me.

hahah nice one, that era was a truly sexy one for the purple p-man

alphastreet said:

hahah nice one,

See, feelin bedda already.

Fonkyman said:

alphastreet said:

hahah nice one,

See, feelin bedda already.

music used to be my medicine tbh, but it nearly killed me...I love me some princey, but can't get too obsessed if you know what I mean

But he's the only star on the scene, ya know what I mean... (Well, used to be)

Music nearly killed ya? That sounds like some badass stage diving to me.

Fonkyman said:

But he's the only star on the scene, ya know what I mean... (Well, used to be)

Music nearly killed ya? That sounds like some badass stage diving to me.

like a mosh pit?

Well, diving into one, yeah.

Food,

Learn all you can about food and food additives and start eating as healthy as you can afford.

It has made a huge difference in my life.

I do not eat any white starches and very very little red meat and poultry.

I am still checking in with a psychiatrist regularly but they agree that I am doing just fine.

I was diagnosed as being bipolar, but the latest word is that I may not have been that after all.

Who knows????

Clearly all the chemicals and hormones in food does mess with peoples heads. The money that the large companies that market these "healthy" meals to us makes is astronomical. They have much to lose by America going back to cooking for themselves from scratch. They don't want us to know what their food additives are not only doing to our bodies but also our minds.

^^^Yes. Before switching from a pill to pot, I would clean up as much as possible. Find out if you're allergic to anything, see what foods change your mood, exercise more, remove stressors from your life, maybe get off the internet if necessary, etc etc. Weed won't change any of those issues, if they exist.

I am definitely not anti-pot, but I would not prescribe it as a cure for your ills, when none of us have any clue what you are actually feeling.

when a medication isn't workin and causin adverse effects

I (personally) go back to the doc and say "Yo this is whut'z up."

commin to a fansite wouldn't even have crossed my mind.

i do however have knowledge of lookin to justify my need to

self medicate, and turnin 'dependance' and addiction into

"real need" too. for that i come to the org. because i know

i can't get any kind of knowledable info accordin to My Personal Needs

as known by the professional who prescibed the med.s in the first place

KingBAD said:

when a medication isn't workin and causin adverse effects

I (personally) go back to the doc and say "Yo this is whut'z up."

commin to a fansite wouldn't even have crossed my mind.

i do however have knowledge of lookin to justify my need to

self medicate, and turnin 'dependance' and addiction into

"real need" too. for that i come to the org. because i know

i can't get any kind of knowledable info accordin to My Personal Needs

as known by the professional who prescibed the med.s in the first place

Yes, a fan site seem ridiculous,

BUT

I have met many many intelligent people on this site.

Prince seems to attract listeners who are diverse, open minded and willing to look a bit deeper in life than most.

Truthfully, we are not a sorry lot.

In general we are over 35, fairly well self-educated as well as schooled.

Honestly, I am a PROUD MEMBER of prince.org.

I will go on,

At one point I took a parenting class.

As part of this class they gave me a pamphlet on how what your child eats affects their mood. (or effects,lol).

Anyway, they talked of sugar, white starches, salt, and how they effect the brain.

Their was a study on inmates.

they love to use prisoners and they fed them exclusively a fast food diet.

The inmates chosen loved this but their anger issues went up significantly.

I couldn't believe what I was reading because the food that my daughter ate in school through the lunch program was not too different from fast food!!!

Anyway, the inmates were adults.

I honestly think that people dealing with any type of mental health issue should see a nutritionist if they can afford it or do research through the internet.

Deadflow3r said:

KingBAD said:

when a medication isn't workin and causin adverse effects

I (personally) go back to the doc and say "Yo this is whut'z up."

commin to a fansite wouldn't even have crossed my mind.

i do however have knowledge of lookin to justify my need to

self medicate, and turnin 'dependance' and addiction into

"real need" too. for that i come to the org. because i know

i can't get any kind of knowledable info accordin to My Personal Needs

as known by the professional who prescibed the med.s in the first place

Yes, a fan site seem ridiculous,

BUT

I have met many many intelligent people on this site.

Prince seems to attract listeners who are diverse, open minded and willing to look a bit deeper in life than most.

Truthfully, we are not a sorry lot.

In general we are over 35, fairly well self-educated as well as schooled.

Honestly, I am a PROUD MEMBER of prince.org.

yes we are,

BUT DO NOT take medical advice from a fan.

that's why i have a doc in the first place.

IF we were that good, i wouldn't need insurence

Deadflow3r said:

Food,

Learn all you can about food and food additives and start eating as healthy as you can afford.

It has made a huge difference in my life.

I do not eat any white starches and very very little red meat and poultry.

I am still checking in with a psychiatrist regularly but they agree that I am doing just fine.

I was diagnosed as being bipolar, but the latest word is that I may not have been that after all.

Who knows????

Clearly all the chemicals and hormones in food does mess with peoples heads. The money that the large companies that market these "healthy" meals to us makes is astronomical. They have much to lose by America going back to cooking for themselves from scratch. They don't want us to know what their food additives are not only doing to our bodies but also our minds.

Good point. Eat healthy foods and get plenty of exercise. Keep some purple music nearby too.

alphastreet said:

JustErin said:

Agreed.

It actually can really help with conditions like yours. Talk to your doctor about it.

I wonder if I could get it in pill form, I can't really stand smoke though I did do some of it in the late 90's and could tolerate it better than a regular cigarette....but I think my real problem is not being understood for the deeper emotions and all the things I use to mask them. Not to sound like an emo child or anything, but only my notebook and people online going through similar struggles can understand some of it. The friends I have who deal with this type of thing had some kind of injury that brought it on, and I did have a minor one that I believe could triggered it too, but I think emotional pain that already existed made me more sensitive though I was hurt, and getting that out will help me if I can find the right professional though I think this is beyond professional help and too much of a buildup

[Edited 10/30/12 7:40am]

Yes, It is available in pill form from the dispensaries. You can also eat it in all types of foods, like brownies, peanut butter, candies, cakes, etc. Medical marijuana stores sell them. I say try it if your medical professional sanctions it. You can also get it in a form that won't get you "high." I wish I could get my hands on some!