I'm sorry but everytime on another forum someone posts pictures of their baby and everyone is like "OMG so precious" I'm like WTF, uglier than a sunburnt pile of runny dog shit. There are no exceptions to me, I don't think human beings can become pleasant to look at until they are toddlers.

You're complaining about other peoples' children when you have a totally hideous avatar?

Okay.

Well Splinter from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is a lot easier to look at than say Jabba the Hutt, or newborns.

[img:$uid]http://files.coloribus.com/files/adsarchive/part_1329/13296355/file/helianthus-baby-clothes-ugly-baby-2-small-61055.jpg[/img:$uid]

post header of the year

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[Edited 10/2/12 12:46pm]

Some are born really cute and some are not...but I must say that most babies are pretty cute.

Even some newborns can be really beautiful after they are cleaned up and their heads get out of that weird shape.

Some of them are awfully cute, but they're all stupid.

Above: Despite their relatively large cranial capacities, babies such as this one are so unintelligent that they are unable to distinguish colorful plastic squeak toys from food sources.

LOS ANGELES--A surprising new study released Monday by UCLA's Institute For Child Development revealed that human babies, long thought by psychologists to be highly inquisitive and adaptable, are actually extraordinarily stupid.

The study, an 18-month battery of intelligence tests administered to over 3,500 babies, concluded categorically that babies are "so stupid, it's not even funny."

Sample Results:

Baby #2,678:

TEST SITUATION: THROWN TO PACK OF WILD DOGS.

RESULT: EATEN.

Baby #217:

TEST SITUATION: WRAPPED IN PLASTIC SHEETING.

RESULT: COULD NOT FREE SELF. NEARLY SUFFOCATED.

Baby #856:

TEST SITUATION: PLACED IN CENTER OF LAKE ERIE IN ROWBOAT WITH NAUTICAL MAP TO SHORE PROVIDED.

RESULT: STILL ADRIFT NEAR ST. LAWRENCE SEAWAY.

According to Institute president Molly Bentley, in an effort to determine infant survival instincts when attacked, the babies were prodded in an aggressive manner with a broken broom handle. Over 90 percent of them, when poked, failed to make even rudimentary attempts to defend themselves. The remaining 10 percent responded by vacating their bowels.

"It is unlikely that the presence of the babies' fecal matter, however foul-smelling, would have a measurable defensive effect against an attacker in a real-world situation," Bentley said.

Another test, in which the infants were placed on a mound of dirt outdoors during a torrential downpour, produced similarly bleak results.

"The chicken, dog and even worm babies that we submitted to the test as a control group all had enough sense to come in from the rain or, at least, seek shelter under a leafy clump of vegetation or outcropping of rock," test supervisor Thomas Howell said. "The human babies, on the other hand, could not grasp even this incredibly basic concept, instead merely lying on the ground and making gurgling noises."

According to Howell, almost 60 percent of the infants tested in this manner eventually drowned.

Some of the babies tested were actually so stupid that they choked to death on pieces of Micronaut space toys. Others, unable to use such primitive instruments as can openers and spoons due to insufficient motor skills, simply starved to death, despite being surrounded by cabinets full of nutritious, life-giving Gerber-brand baby-food products.

Babies, the study concluded, are also too stupid to do the following: avoid getting their heads trapped in automatic car windows; use ice to alleviate the pain of burn injuries resulting from touching an open flame; master the skills required for scuba diving; and use a safety ladder to reach a window to escape from a room filled with cyanide gas.

"As a mother of four, I find these results very disheartening," Bentley told reporters. "I can honestly say that the effort I have expended trying to raise my children into intelligent beings may have been entirely wasted--a fool's dream, if you will."

Study results also prompted a strong reaction from President Clinton. "All of us, on some primitive, mammalian level, feel a great sense of pride in our offspring," Clinton said. "It is now clear, however, that these feelings are unfounded. Given the overwhelming evidence of their profound stupidity, we have no choice but to replace our existing infant population with artificially incubated simu-drones, with the eventual goal of phasing out the shamefully stupid human baby forever."

I guarantee that one chick from Australia agrees with you. I forgot her name, but the one that thinks people who have kids have no right to be happy is who I'm talking about.

Newborns are hideous, but after 6 months or so they are adorable!

i just stare right at those wrinkly, red little faces and say "oh, how gorgeous. what a sweet little baby." no matter WHAT they look like. and i never, ever tell the new parent their child looks like a hairless little capuchin monkey. well, hardly ever. unless it really IS a monkey.

When babies are born, they're gonna always come off like that. Within a few days or a week though, they're adorable. I've rarely come across a baby that was ugly in any shape, fashion or form lol

[Edited 10/2/12 16:08pm]

NDRU said:

Newborns are hideous, but after 6 months or so they are adorable!

I agree. I never say "Oh how cute" or "Oh how precious" when I see a newborn, I say "That's neat."

You sir are wrong. All babies are beautiful. How could you NOT melt with adoring love for this little chap.

I find very few newborns actually cute, but many infants are absolutely adorable.

Folks please not the babies Leave dem babies alone

babies are supercute as soon as they're +2 weeks old

Lammastide said:

I find very few newborns actually cute, but many infants are absolutely adorable.

ZombieKitten said:

lust said:

Not to brag and all, but my daughter was a pretty baby. I was the last person to hold her because the nurse was showing her off. A head full of jet black hair and chubby She made homecoming this year

ZombieKitten said:

All babies are ugly except your own.

Yes sir, you are.

ZombieKitten said:

All babies are ugly except your own.

Totally not true!

Hudson said:

I'm sorry but everytime on another forum someone posts pictures of their baby and everyone is like "OMG so precious" I'm like WTF, uglier than a sunburnt pile of runny dog shit. There are no exceptions to me, I don't think human beings can become pleasant to look at until they are toddlers.

I used to feel the same way based on that infamous first picture they would take of babies at the hospital back in the day. Then, I saw a nursery at a local hospital back in 2006. All the newborns were as cute as they could be. I was like, WTF happened over the years? Newborn babies used to be jacked up back in the 70s and 80s.

Even i was ugly as a baby