Genesia said:

missfee said:

Every guy I've met has always felt like they haven't accomplished all that they felt they needed to accomplish in life in order to feel complete. All of them weren't insecure, but most were...especially if I had already conquered goals that they hadn't achieved yet (career, owning a home, etc).

Who does feel like they've accomplished everything? If you ever get to that point, you might as well die.

Gen, have you ever read Buddhist philosophy?

Ace said:

Genesia said:

Who does feel like they've accomplished everything? If you ever get to that point, you might as well die.

Gen, have you ever read Buddhist philosophy?

In what sense? Are you thinking of something like, "Tao does not make" - that craving and attachment are things to be overcome? Or that the cyclical nature of life and death means one is never "complete"?

Genesia said:

Ace said:

Gen, have you ever read Buddhist philosophy?

In what sense? Are you thinking of something like, "Tao does not make" - that craving and attachment are things to be overcome? Or that the cyclical nature of life and death means one is never "complete"?

The craving-and-attachment thing.

All kidding aside...

The human mind is a wonderful thing.

We have yet to tap into all that gray matter...who KNOWS what we will be able to accomplish once we've mastered the full use of our brains.

Love is one of those things that the mind cannot fully comprehend. How we can become "attached" to another human being and turn that attachment into "love" is a magnificent and frightening thing.

Is there such a thing as Destiny? Is there such a thing as reincarnation? Are there greater powers at play which have a hand at prodding us one way or another?

For 15 years of my life I would've said yes. I had that person that felt as if she were an extension of my very self. That person that I thought to be in such sync with that we could just tell what we were thinking or feeling.

We met by chance, working at the same place for YEARS before meeting one day. Destiny? Coincidence? Random chance?

What I can say now that things turned to shit, is that our minds are powerful things, and maybe we convince ourselves that things are one way when in reality they are not. We can convince ourselves that a situation if wonderful, or that things are horrible, when the truth may be completely different.

It's how you choose to see the world.

The feelings - those flutterings and heart palpitations & such - it's all controlled by whatever part of your mind is directing you to find a mate.

That's all for now.

I don't know about destiny. But I do believe that Sweetie and I met for a reason - and we've been in love since the moment we met.

PurpleJedi said:

our minds are powerful things, and maybe we convince ourselves that things are one way when in reality they are not. We can convince ourselves that a situation if wonderful, or that things are horrible, when the truth may be completely different.

It's how you choose to see the world.

The feelings - those flutterings and heart palpitations & such - it's all controlled by whatever part of your mind is directing you to find a mate.

Of course, there are no literal flutterings and heart palpitations (but you know that, PJ).

We are socialized from an early age to believe that our happiness is tied to "falling in love" (interesting the use of the word "falling" ). "Love" is usually portrayed as some mystical thing.

In reality, what we deem "love" (at least in the "romantic" sense) is a desire to spend as much time as possible with someone that you want to hump. Oftentimes, this desire lessens radically over time (sometimes over very little time). Sometimes, the person we want to spend all that time with and hump, wants to spend that time with somebody else who they hope to hump (or are already humping). This usually doesn't work out so well.

My advice? Forget all this "love" nonsense and read some Buddhist philosophy.

You can thank me later.

Ace said:

PurpleJedi said:

our minds are powerful things, and maybe we convince ourselves that things are one way when in reality they are not. We can convince ourselves that a situation if wonderful, or that things are horrible, when the truth may be completely different.

It's how you choose to see the world.

The feelings - those flutterings and heart palpitations & such - it's all controlled by whatever part of your mind is directing you to find a mate.

Of course, there are no literal flutterings and heart palpitations (but you know that, PJ).

We are socialized from an early age to believe that our happiness is tied to "falling in love" (interesting the use of the word "falling" ). "Love" is usually portrayed as some mystical thing.

In reality, what we deem "love" (at least in the "romantic" sense) is a desire to spend as much time as possible with someone that you want to hump. Oftentimes, this desire lessens radically over time (sometimes over very little time). Sometimes, the person we want to spend all that time with and hump, wants to spend that time with somebody else who they hope to hump (or are already humping). This usually doesn't work out so well.

My advice? Forget all this "love" nonsense and read some Buddhist philosophy.

You can thank me later.

Speak for yourself.

Genesia said:

Ace said:

Of course, there are no literal flutterings and heart palpitations (but you know that, PJ).

We are socialized from an early age to believe that our happiness is tied to "falling in love" (interesting the use of the word "falling" ). "Love" is usually portrayed as some mystical thing.

In reality, what we deem "love" (at least in the "romantic" sense) is a desire to spend as much time as possible with someone that you want to hump. Oftentimes, this desire lessens radically over time (sometimes over very little time). Sometimes, the person we want to spend all that time with and hump, wants to spend that time with somebody else who they hope to hump (or are already humping). This usually doesn't work out so well.

My advice? Forget all this "love" nonsense and read some Buddhist philosophy.

You can thank me later.

Speak for yourself.

You flutter and/or palpitate?

Ace said:

Genesia said:

Speak for yourself.

You flutter and/or palpitate?

I have, yeah. Not all the time, but often enough.

I don´t have many positive experiences that I can think of as ´proof´ that love is a good thing in life.

And unfortunately I don´t see many people around me who do have a relationship and kids that convince me that love is a good thing in life.

I have some friends and I love them dearly. Most of them are in the same situation as I am; single and no kids.

We'r allright, untill it's about potential partners. Then the drama kicks in.

I like being alone. And most of the days, I bless myself not having to deal with a man or kids. However, I also don't have a lot money. So, I can't afford to go out to the theatre, movies or concert every week. And that can be a lonely.

Sometimes I feel I want somebody to share my life with. Just because I think it's nice to have somebody who cares and care for somebody on that level.

On the other hand, I realise that relationships are just a burden.

And eventhough I know that, I still miss Londonboy. Maybe that's is just me chasing a fantasy.

I just find it hard to go through life alone, suffering just because I'm alife. And I do try to tell myself it's just suffering and I should not pay attention to it. And I know that I will still suffer if I'm in a relationship or if I would have had kids. Everybody suffers. That's just life. I know.

It's just that I now think that if you have a partner and children than at least you know why you are suffering.

I would never leave my family or friends. I'm not capable of hurting them.

It's just that I don't see the point of it. I guess not hurting them and trying to relief them is the point of it.

A destiny would relief my suffering, because then it's at least for a valid cause.

tinaz said:

dJJ said:

@ Tinaz;

Do you feel your husband and you were 'meant' for eachother?

Well, the nite we met, it was at a party held by some old classmates of mine.. I went only because a guy I used to like was supposed to be there... So all nite I was on the look out for him until this hot preppy looking guy started talking to me while we were playing at a quarters table...

Then his friends started razzing him, so he stood up, all arrogant and shit, and looked at me and said, "if you want to go out with me, come and find me and give me your number"... I just kinda laughed it off because THE NERVE right!!! Sooooo I kinda slipped away from the table so I could keep my eye on this guy who just totally made me drool! Now, I am NOT forward or a very brave person but I saw that the three of them were leaving so I rushed up to the door and shut it in his face and asked if he still wanted my number..

Andddddd here we are 25 years later! There have been some bad times, but there are so many good times past, present and future that I cant imagine life without him, and we are lost without each other..

Yes, I believe we were meant to be together... to many "if onlys" for it not to be... I believe we were drawn together, not by a cosmic force, but by a feeling that came froma simple conversation..

Oh, he wasnt supposed to be at that party that nite either... His friends talked him into into it...

It was meant to be!

.

[Edited 6/17/12 17:58pm]

I really love your story.

Gives me hope.

PurpleJedi said:

All kidding aside...

The human mind is a wonderful thing.

We have yet to tap into all that gray matter...who KNOWS what we will be able to accomplish once we've mastered the full use of our brains.

Love is one of those things that the mind cannot fully comprehend. How we can become "attached" to another human being and turn that attachment into "love" is a magnificent and frightening thing.

Is there such a thing as Destiny? Is there such a thing as reincarnation? Are there greater powers at play which have a hand at prodding us one way or another?

For 15 years of my life I would've said yes. I had that person that felt as if she were an extension of my very self. That person that I thought to be in such sync with that we could just tell what we were thinking or feeling.

We met by chance, working at the same place for YEARS before meeting one day. Destiny? Coincidence? Random chance?

What I can say now that things turned to shit, is that our minds are powerful things, and maybe we convince ourselves that things are one way when in reality they are not. We can convince ourselves that a situation if wonderful, or that things are horrible, when the truth may be completely different.

It's how you choose to see the world.

The feelings - those flutterings and heart palpitations & such - it's all controlled by whatever part of your mind is directing you to find a mate.

That's all for now.

True.

And I know that. And it drives me crazy!

Sometimes I think A'm just to paranoid, other times I think I'm to trusting. I find it very hard to rely on my own judgement. Not because I'm bad at judging people, it's just that I know a lot of people are very good at deceiving others.

WHAT IS LOVE, anyway?

Nah. But some folks have found that those who fight for the ones they love is usually because they're determined. Otherwise, I think folks get into relationships for other reasons than love.

Timmy84 said:

Nah. But some folks have found that those who fight for the ones they love is usually because they're determined. Otherwise, I think folks get into relationships for other reasons than love.

AMEN

JustErin said:

Naw...shit just happens.

JoeTyler said:

WHAT IS LOVE, anyway?

Good question!

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

I have never believed it.

To me, ANYTHING that is destined means there's a really cruel and senseless creator behind it all--and you're either favored or not. THAT's a universe I don't accept.

I also don't believe there's a 'one" for you. There are potentially billions (at least a few hundred million) that you could be madly in love with depending on circumstances.

I also don't believe love is everlasting. One of you will fall out of it eventually, or one will die, etc.

So, while it lasts, enjoy it. When it ends, don't long for it back. I think the greatest thing about being in love is how strong and purposeful it makes you feel--even if that's a fleeting emotion, I just think it's plain wonderful.

I've met someone recently I think I could be in love with. For me, it's not entirely emotional though---there's a great deal of pragmatism I factor in now. For example, fast foward 10 years--will I still be happy in this relationship? Etc. Etc. I just don't beleive love is the key element to a bond--I think it's a start.

tinaz said:

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

I've seen what it's done to my brothers and sisters. Those who claimed they fallen in love only to fall apart midway through. The exceptions are my parents and my eldest sister/brother-in-law.

Also to answer your question: yep single... I live by this theology:

I can do bad all by myself.

[Edited 6/18/12 19:10pm]

tinaz said:

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

Yep, and loving every minute of it.

uPtoWnNY said:

tinaz said:

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

Yep, and loving every minute of it.

I predict you will be engaged by this time next year,

JoeTyler said:

WHAT IS LOVE, anyway?

I absolute LOVE that song!

imago said:

I have never believed it.

To me, ANYTHING that is destined means there's a really cruel and senseless creator behind it all--and you're either favored or not. THAT's a universe I don't accept.

I also don't believe there's a 'one" for you. There are potentially billions (at least a few hundred million) that you could be madly in love with depending on circumstances.

I also don't believe love is everlasting. One of you will fall out of it eventually, or one will die, etc.

So, while it lasts, enjoy it. When it ends, don't long for it back. I think the greatest thing about being in love is how strong and purposeful it makes you feel--even if that's a fleeting emotion, I just think it's plain wonderful.

I've met someone recently I think I could be in love with. For me, it's not entirely emotional though---there's a great deal of pragmatism I factor in now. For example, fast foward 10 years--will I still be happy in this relationship? Etc. Etc. I just don't beleive love is the key element to a bond--I think it's a start.

Agree 100%.

We're destined to agree on this.

tinaz said:

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

hmm, it depends on what you think "single" means...

if by "single" you mean a nerd jerking off to porn and being ignored by the hot gals of the beach and envying the couples that kiss tenderly on the street. then NO, I'm not single...

if by single you mean a free individual who can meet, talk to and/or have sex with any woman/girl/man (why not) (if he/she's also interested of course) without fear of a broken heart or fear of becoming a beast of burden, then YES I'M SINGLE...

tinaz said:

Im curious.. those of you who are poo-pooing all this love business, are you single?

Well, it makes sense, the singles dismiss the love thing, the one with another half are believers.

Big question; are we single because we poo-poo on love or has love poo-pooed on us, so we stay sinle?

Dave1992 said:

imago said:

I have never believed it.

To me, ANYTHING that is destined means there's a really cruel and senseless creator behind it all--and you're either favored or not. THAT's a universe I don't accept.

I also don't believe there's a 'one" for you. There are potentially billions (at least a few hundred million) that you could be madly in love with depending on circumstances.

I also don't believe love is everlasting. One of you will fall out of it eventually, or one will die, etc.

So, while it lasts, enjoy it. When it ends, don't long for it back. I think the greatest thing about being in love is how strong and purposeful it makes you feel--even if that's a fleeting emotion, I just think it's plain wonderful.

I've met someone recently I think I could be in love with. For me, it's not entirely emotional though---there's a great deal of pragmatism I factor in now. For example, fast foward 10 years--will I still be happy in this relationship? Etc. Etc. I just don't beleive love is the key element to a bond--I think it's a start.

Agree 100%.

We're destined to agree on this.

Swear to gawd, Dave , if I was a woman, and 20 years younger, my tight pert little pink pussy would be pouring out a pussy-nami like you wouldn't believe

~dave1992 win~

For tinaz and the other believers...