So...is anyone else struggling to get their spending under control?

I used to be very frugal and had my finances well under control.

After we bought the house, things got a little crazy.

I handed over the reigns to the ex, and by the time we separated our (formerly excellent) credit was shot and money was a major issue.

The past year I haven't given a flying fart about my credit rating, timely payments, or (gasp) saving money. Been enjoying myself.

NOW, I'm starting to sober up and want to end the cycle of hand-to-mouth living. It'd be nice to have a savings account again.

SO...anyone have any pointers as to how someone can get help getting their financial affairs in order?

It's been so long since I've seriously budgeted out money & stuff that I don't even know where to begin.

First, you have to get an idea of how much you're spending. Start by getting receipts for everything - even a Coke at McDonald's. (Make your own receipts for things like mortgage or rent, for which you don't get a receipt.) Make envelopes for various categories - "House," "Transportation," "Food," "Clothing," etc. - and put the receipts in the appropriate envelopes.

At the end of the month, tally up all the receipts in each envelope. This will give you an idea of what you're spending in each area - as well as giving you a wake-up call as to how much "mindless" spending you're doing.

From there, you can start to tighten your belt - because you'll know what spending is essential and non-essential.

The first thing I would do is make a spreadsheet to track where you're spending your money. Make columns for things like: groceries, insurance, gym, transportation, clothing, mortgage, etc. Then go through your bills from at least the past year (or two) and see how much you've spent in each categorie (per month is best). Then look at your actual income. Hopefull it is more than your expenses! If not, you need to lower your costs! (Or bring in more income, or a combo of both.)

Start paying your bills on time! Pay off anything with high interest first and/or a low balance first. Then take that amount and put it towards the next bill. (That's what I will do with my student loan; when the private loan is paid off, that amount will be paid towards the Federal.)

Any time you get any raise, or extra money, have it deposited directly into your savings account; if you don't see it you won't miss it. I do this with tax refunds, raises, reimbursements, gifts, etc. My savings account is online only (no branches) and in order to withdraw money I have to transfer it to my checking account (which takes about 5 days) before I can withdraw it. That helps me not spend it. (I do have a savings account tied to my checking with around $1000 that I can liquidate from an ATM.)

I know there are nonprofits that will help you (for free) come up with a plan to pay down debt, make a budget; you could try to Google.

Good luck!

.

[Edited 3/9/12 9:53am]

Genesia said:

First, you have to get an idea of how much you're spending. Start by getting receipts for everything - even a Coke at McDonald's. (Make your own receipts for things like mortgage or rent, for which you don't get a receipt.) Make envelopes for various categories - "House," "Transportation," "Food," "Clothing," etc. - and put the receipts in the appropriate envelopes.

At the end of the month, tally up all the receipts in each envelope. This will give you an idea of what you're spending in each area - as well as giving you a wake-up call as to how much "mindless" spending you're doing.

From there, you can start to tighten your belt - because you'll know what spending is essential and non-essential.

Ooh...that's an excellent idea. I already like to get a receipt for EVERYTHING, but they usually wind up on the floor of my car or something.

What about a program such as Microsoft Money or Mint.com? I am hesitant to use one of those "finance" programs that tracks your spending and stuff because you need to give them your credit card access info & stuff.

I don't know...

PurpleJedi said:

What about a program such as Microsoft Money or Mint.com? I am hesitant to use one of those "finance" programs that tracks your spending and stuff because you need to give them your credit card access info & stuff.

I don't know...

You don't need a program, you can use Excel.

jone70 said:

The first thing I would do is make a spreadsheet to track where you're spending your money. Make columns for things like: groceries, insurance, gym, transportation, clothing, mortgage, etc. Then go through your bills from at least the past year (or two) and see how much you've spent in each categorie (per month is best). Then look at your actual income. Hopefull it is more than your expenses! If not, you need to lower your costs! (Or bring in more income, or a combo of both.)

Start paying your bills on time! Pay off anything with high interest first and/or a low balance first. Then take that amount and put it towards the next bill. (That's what I will do with my student loan; when the private loan is paid off, that amount will be paid towards the Federal.)

Any time you get any raise, or extra money, have it deposited directly into your savings account; if you don't see it you won't miss it. I do this with tax refunds, raises, reimbursements, gifts, etc. My savings account is online only (no branches) and in order to withdraw money I have to transfer it to my checking account (which takes about 5 days) before I can withdraw it. That helps me not spend it. (I do have a savings account tied to my checking with around $1000 that I can liquidate from an ATM.)

I know there are nonprofits that will help you (for free) come up with a plan to pay down debt, make a budget; you could try to Google.

Good luck!

That's what I plan to do with the $1k I'm getting back from the IRS...I'm putting it in a new account that I don't plan on touching.

I already consolidated some credit cards (in anticipation of the divorce) so in 5 years we should be paid off.

Making a BUDGET is the hardest thing for me. I remember back-in-the-day when I was paying rent and my ex first stopped working to have our son...I went onto Exel and created a spreadsheet from scratch that I used to plan out each month - what was coming in and what was going out. I can't, for the life of me, get back into that mentality.

Lord knows I've tried.

It never occurred to me to Google "make a budget".

Also I would study prices of things that look valuable but may hurt your bank account, you don't wanna overspend your means...

I know the budgeting and receipts and spreadsheets are a really good idea, but it's realistically a bit much for a guy like me to expect myself to do.

Most important things for me have been

1. Don't use credit cards for anything.

2. Save $1000 for those little emergencies that you would normally use a credit card for

3. Live within your means--basically, stop buying shit!

I hardly buy anything anymore, as I dig myself out of the hole. I don't go out to dinner, I don't buy clothes, I don't buy gadgets, I don't have a car payment, I don't have cable or a landline, I don't take vacations, I make my lunch for work, I share internet, etc. It sounds terrible, but you get used to it and you start to realize how little a person really needs.

NDRU said:

I know the budgeting and receipts and spreadsheets are a really good idea, but it's realistically a bit much for a guy like me to expect myself to do.

Most important things for me have been

1. Don't use credit cards for anything.

2. Save $1000 for those little emergencies that you would normally use a credit card for

3. Live within your means--basically, stop buying shit!

I hardly buy anything anymore, as I dig myself out of the hole. I don't go out to dinner, I don't buy clothes, I don't buy gadgets, I don't have a car payment, I don't have cable or a landline, I don't take vacations, I make my lunch for work, I share internet, etc. It sounds terrible, but you get used to it and you start to realize how little a person really needs.

It's actually a really good idea to just take the card out of your wallet and put it someplace where it isn't readily accessible. I heard of a person who took their credit card and froze it in a plastic bag of water. By the time the card thawed out (you can't microwave it without scotching the magnetic strip), the impulse to buy whatever was usually gone.

Genesia said:

NDRU said:

I know the budgeting and receipts and spreadsheets are a really good idea, but it's realistically a bit much for a guy like me to expect myself to do.

Most important things for me have been

1. Don't use credit cards for anything.

2. Save $1000 for those little emergencies that you would normally use a credit card for

3. Live within your means--basically, stop buying shit!

I hardly buy anything anymore, as I dig myself out of the hole. I don't go out to dinner, I don't buy clothes, I don't buy gadgets, I don't have a car payment, I don't have cable or a landline, I don't take vacations, I make my lunch for work, I share internet, etc. It sounds terrible, but you get used to it and you start to realize how little a person really needs.

It's actually a really good idea to just take the card out of your wallet and put it someplace where it isn't readily accessible. I heard of a person who took their credit card and froze it in a plastic bag of water. By the time the card thawed out (you can't microwave it without scotching the magnetic strip), the impulse to buy whatever was usually gone.

Absolutely. You can cut them up or freeze them, but for me, simply not having them in the wallet is usually good enough.

If they are there, I always have that choice "pay with real money, or with plastic fairy dust?" And it's always the fairy dust.

NDRU said:

Genesia said:

It's actually a really good idea to just take the card out of your wallet and put it someplace where it isn't readily accessible. I heard of a person who took their credit card and froze it in a plastic bag of water. By the time the card thawed out (you can't microwave it without scotching the magnetic strip), the impulse to buy whatever was usually gone.

Absolutely. You can cut them up or freeze them, but for me, simply not having them in the wallet is usually good enough.

If they are there, I always have that choice "pay with real money, or with plastic fairy dust?" And it's always the fairy dust.

NDRU said:

Genesia said:

It's actually a really good idea to just take the card out of your wallet and put it someplace where it isn't readily accessible. I heard of a person who took their credit card and froze it in a plastic bag of water. By the time the card thawed out (you can't microwave it without scotching the magnetic strip), the impulse to buy whatever was usually gone.

Absolutely. You can cut them up or freeze them, but for me, simply not having them in the wallet is usually good enough.

If they are there, I always have that choice "pay with real money, or with plastic fairy dust?" And it's always the fairy dust.

It's more secure, too. I asked myself, "Do I really need to be walking around with tens of thousands of dollars of buying power in my wallet? What if that falls into the wrong hands?"

All good advice. I do mostly what jone70 does.

I have created a budget on a simple exel spreadsheet.

First, I note my monthly income.

Then I list all of my monthly bills including rent/mortgage, utilities, insurance, etc. and subtract from the total.

Then I look at what’s leftover and create a monthly allowance for groceries and other necessities (like gas for your car) and subtract those from the total.

With what’s left, I determine how much to put in savings and how much is for entertainment and fun, like eating out, going to the movies, buying a new album, etc. I don’t have any credit card or other debt, but if you do, I’d look at what to pay down out of this amount as well.

And then you have to stick to it! I even keep my old ones when things change (get a raise, pay off a major bill) so I can see where I’m at over time.

I currently have an “emergency” fund in an online-only savings account (just like jone70 mentioned) with at least 3 months expenses (the necessities). And, like her, I keep a savings account attached to my checking that I always keep a reserve in ($2000). Anytime I have more than my reserve in my savings and don’t have a bigger purchase it’s earmarked for (furniture, travel, etc.), I move it over to my emergency fund. I do use one credit card, but I pay the balance off every month, without fail.

Someday, I’ll start investing the stuff that’s above and beyond my emergency fund. But I’m not quite there yet.

Put all cards away and buy everything with cash. You'll be shocked at what you spend.

LAWDY LAWDY LAWDY!!!

why am i always the last to know?

how long do i got?

who told you?

but i still feel good

WHY DO DA GOOD DIE SO YOUNG???

i ain't gonna doit. I AIN'T!!!

that's all y'all want is ta see who i leave it to.

WELL TOO BAD!!! i'm takin it wit me.

i'm goin out like an egyptian. NAH!!!

We havent had a credit card in ...jeez, probabaly well over 10 years... Dont miss them AT ALL!

Something that really helps me keep my bills paid on time is "Bill Pay".. Its thru my bank... I go into my account, set up the dates and times I want the bill paid, and then I throw it away and dont worry about it! I used to be HORRIBLE about paying them on time, id stick them in a drawer and forget about them, or put them off... this way, I dont even have to think about it after its entered in... it takes seconds to schedule a payment after the intitial entry of all the info... and the best part... ITS FREEEEEEE!!!

Genesia said:

NDRU said:

I know the budgeting and receipts and spreadsheets are a really good idea, but it's realistically a bit much for a guy like me to expect myself to do.

Most important things for me have been

1. Don't use credit cards for anything.

2. Save $1000 for those little emergencies that you would normally use a credit card for

3. Live within your means--basically, stop buying shit!

I hardly buy anything anymore, as I dig myself out of the hole. I don't go out to dinner, I don't buy clothes, I don't buy gadgets, I don't have a car payment, I don't have cable or a landline, I don't take vacations, I make my lunch for work, I share internet, etc. It sounds terrible, but you get used to it and you start to realize how little a person really needs.

It's actually a really good idea to just take the card out of your wallet and put it someplace where it isn't readily accessible. I heard of a person who took their credit card and froze it in a plastic bag of water. By the time the card thawed out (you can't microwave it without scotching the magnetic strip), the impulse to buy whatever was usually gone.

I took my only two credit cards and put them in my drawer. This really works

Thanks all.

I have just discovered a neat feature of my bank's website.

There's a link to a page that actually breaks down your spending by categories.

This is GREAT for me b/c I use my debit card for EVERYTHING.

(Like many of you all, I got rid of my credit cards about a year ago)

Now I'm stunned to see how much I spend in "Dining" and "Entertainment" each month.

I have to just buckle down and force myself to do like Carrie does (and like I USED to do) and look at what I'm working with and establish a "means".

:sigh;

..or I can blow my next few paychecks on lottery tickets and go to the racetrack and pray for a windfall....

Everyone’s been very clear-headed and I don’t think I anything too innovative to add, but I am going to speak up just a little for credit cards, because I think they can be a fine tool if used properly. I personally put every purchase I can on my credit card, as I find it a very useful for tracking all of my expenses, plus I earn points (I get about ½ dozen new books every year through my accumulated points). I just make sure I pay off the full balance on the card every payday.

You’ve already stated that your bank has a function that allows you to track your debit card purchases in much the same manner, so that’s just as effective for expense review. Personally i could never be bothered to keep all of my receipts, but my bank (and I’m sure this isn’t unique) allows me to export all of my transactions to an excel file, which I then use to create a ongoing summary of all expenses. From there, it’s a simple matter of comparing actual costs to budget and being disciplined about adhering to the budget and cutting back when budgets are exceeded.

damosuzuki said:

Everyone’s been very clear-headed and I don’t think I anything too innovative to add, but I am going to speak up just a little for credit cards, because I think they can be a fine tool if used properly. I personally put every purchase I can on my credit card, as I find it a very useful for tracking all of my expenses, plus I earn points (I get about ½ dozen new books every year through my accumulated points). I just make sure I pay off the full balance on the card every payday.

You’ve already stated that your bank has a function that allows you to track your debit card purchases in much the same manner, so that’s just as effective for expense review. Personally i could never be bothered to keep all of my receipts, but my bank (and I’m sure this isn’t unique) allows me to export all of my transactions to an excel file, which I then use to create a ongoing summary of all expenses. From there, it’s a simple matter of comparing actual costs to budget and being disciplined about adhering to the budget and cutting back when budgets are exceeded.

Thanks

damosuzuki said:

Everyone’s been very clear-headed and I don’t think I anything too innovative to add, but I am going to speak up just a little for credit cards, because I think they can be a fine tool if used properly. I personally put every purchase I can on my credit card, as I find it a very useful for tracking all of my expenses, plus I earn points (I get about ½ dozen new books every year through my accumulated points). I just make sure I pay off the full balance on the card every payday.

You’ve already stated that your bank has a function that allows you to track your debit card purchases in much the same manner, so that’s just as effective for expense review. Personally i could never be bothered to keep all of my receipts, but my bank (and I’m sure this isn’t unique) allows me to export all of my transactions to an excel file, which I then use to create a ongoing summary of all expenses. From there, it’s a simple matter of comparing actual costs to budget and being disciplined about adhering to the budget and cutting back when budgets are exceeded.

I do have one credit card that has a $500 limit, and I am considering using that for my purchases, as there is not any real risk of it getting out of control

NDRU said:

damosuzuki said:

Everyone’s been very clear-headed and I don’t think I anything too innovative to add, but I am going to speak up just a little for credit cards, because I think they can be a fine tool if used properly. I personally put every purchase I can on my credit card, as I find it a very useful for tracking all of my expenses, plus I earn points (I get about ½ dozen new books every year through my accumulated points). I just make sure I pay off the full balance on the card every payday.

You’ve already stated that your bank has a function that allows you to track your debit card purchases in much the same manner, so that’s just as effective for expense review. Personally i could never be bothered to keep all of my receipts, but my bank (and I’m sure this isn’t unique) allows me to export all of my transactions to an excel file, which I then use to create a ongoing summary of all expenses. From there, it’s a simple matter of comparing actual costs to budget and being disciplined about adhering to the budget and cutting back when budgets are exceeded.

I do have one credit card that has a $500 limit, and I am considering using that for my purchases, as there is not any real risk of it getting out of control

I purposefully got rid of all my credit cards years ago with the exception of 2 cards. Both have small limits on purpose. One of my cards used to be able to charge 20,000!!! I wouldn't charge 20,000!!!! The card started out at 8,000 limit and they just kept increasing it. But you need credit card for hotel and trips. Plus, you can get great insurance from credit cards for trips at no cost.

I think everyone here has great ideas on how to track your money.

Tips for saving money.

1) Bring your lunch and snacks to work. (I have never bought a single item in the vending machine at work.) By bringing lunch you have planned on how much you spend, otherwise it's free fall of cash waste on expensive treats.

2) When buying an item do your research and buy at the best price. There is no need to rush.For instance, when buying clothes you use the clearance rack. I for instance have gone to kohls and wanted to purchase a casual shirt that was original like 45 bucks and now was 5 bucks. And of course they didn't have my size, so I went to customer service and used there phone to call their online service and they had my size and shipped it for free to my house.

3) Save money on gas by planning your trips more thoughtfully. For instance, I want to go grocery shopping today. But, I wont. Because it's a long way away from here, so it's best to do that on my way home from work.

4) Stop eating fast food. It's overpriced, when you can make better at home. I make my own fast food at my house. I buy the precooked angus beef patties at costco (costs about 1.20 a patty), they taste like the came right off the grill. I add spinach, salad dressing, cheese, etc, or whatever you like to put on your burger and it costs me about 1.50 for the entire quarter pounder gourmet burger. And I didn't have to wait in line wasting gas or time. It takes me about 2 minutes to make the gourmet burger.

I also make 4oz wild salmon, with a baked potato, and a side of vegetable fast food and that takes about 5 minutes. (Costs about 1.75)

The other bonus to making your own fast food is that you don't buy the impulse junk food that looks so enticing while at the fast food joint.

kewlschool said:

NDRU said:

I do have one credit card that has a $500 limit, and I am considering using that for my purchases, as there is not any real risk of it getting out of control

I purposefully got rid of all my credit cards years ago with the exception of 2 cards. Both have small limits on purpose. One of my cards used to be able to charge 20,000!!! I wouldn't charge 20,000!!!! The card started out at 8,000 limit and they just kept increasing it. But you need credit card for hotel and trips. Plus, you can get great insurance from credit cards for trips at no cost.

I think everyone here has great ideas on how to track your money.

Tips for saving money.

1) Bring your lunch and snacks to work. (I have never bought a single item in the vending machine at work.) By bringing lunch you have planned on how much you spend, otherwise it's free fall of cash waste on expensive treats.

2) When buying an item do your research and buy at the best price. There is no need to rush.For instance, when buying clothes you use the clearance rack. I for instance have gone to kohls and wanted to purchase a casual shirt that was original like 45 bucks and now was 5 bucks. And of course they didn't have my size, so I went to customer service and used there phone to call their online service and they had my size and shipped it for free to my house.

3) Save money on gas by planning your trips more thoughtfully. For instance, I want to go grocery shopping today. But, I wont. Because it's a long way away from here, so it's best to do that on my way home from work.

4) Stop eating fast food. It's overpriced, when you can make better at home. I make my own fast food at my house. I buy the precooked angus beef patties at costco (costs about 1.20 a patty), they taste like the came right off the grill. I add spinach, salad dressing, cheese, etc, or whatever you like to put on your burger and it costs me about 1.50 for the entire quarter pounder gourmet burger. And I didn't have to wait in line wasting gas or time. It takes me about 2 minutes to make the gourmet burger.

I also make 4oz wild salmon, with a baked potato, and a side of vegetable fast food and that takes about 5 minutes. (Costs about 1.75)

The other bonus to making your own fast food is that you don't buy the impulse junk food that looks so enticing while at the fast food joint.

I use my debit card on all my trips

[Edited 3/10/12 14:24pm]

tinaz said:

kewlschool said:

I purposefully got rid of all my credit cards years ago with the exception of 2 cards. Both have small limits on purpose. One of my cards used to be able to charge 20,000!!! I wouldn't charge 20,000!!!! The card started out at 8,000 limit and they just kept increasing it. But you need credit card for hotel and trips. Plus, you can get great insurance from credit cards for trips at no cost.

I think everyone here has great ideas on how to track your money.

Tips for saving money.

1) Bring your lunch and snacks to work. (I have never bought a single item in the vending machine at work.) By bringing lunch you have planned on how much you spend, otherwise it's free fall of cash waste on expensive treats.

2) When buying an item do your research and buy at the best price. There is no need to rush.For instance, when buying clothes you use the clearance rack. I for instance have gone to kohls and wanted to purchase a casual shirt that was original like 45 bucks and now was 5 bucks. And of course they didn't have my size, so I went to customer service and used there phone to call their online service and they had my size and shipped it for free to my house.

3) Save money on gas by planning your trips more thoughtfully. For instance, I want to go grocery shopping today. But, I wont. Because it's a long way away from here, so it's best to do that on my way home from work.

4) Stop eating fast food. It's overpriced, when you can make better at home. I make my own fast food at my house. I buy the precooked angus beef patties at costco (costs about 1.20 a patty), they taste like the came right off the grill. I add spinach, salad dressing, cheese, etc, or whatever you like to put on your burger and it costs me about 1.50 for the entire quarter pounder gourmet burger. And I didn't have to wait in line wasting gas or time. It takes me about 2 minutes to make the gourmet burger.

I also make 4oz wild salmon, with a baked potato, and a side of vegetable fast food and that takes about 5 minutes. (Costs about 1.75)

The other bonus to making your own fast food is that you don't buy the impulse junk food that looks so enticing while at the fast food joint.

I use my debit card on all my trips

[Edited 3/10/12 14:24pm]

I new someone who used their debit card at a hotel in Cali. They came back home to find out their checking account was cleaned out and that all their automatic payments bounced due to no funds in their account. Apparently the hotel staff member swiped their card into a reader and made a duplicate card and used the security cameras to get their pin number.

I will only use credit at hotels and only cash at restaurants. Restaurant workers are notorious for using card readers to store the info and then steal it.

Also, I never use any portable or free standing ATM machine ever. Anyone can own one and set it up, you don't have to be a bank or a credit union. They have done studies and news reports on how the mob and gangs use them.

kewlschool said:

tinaz said:

I use my debit card on all my trips

[Edited 3/10/12 14:24pm]

I new someone who used their debit card at a hotel in Cali. They came back home to find out their checking account was cleaned out and that all their automatic payments bounced due to no funds in their account. Apparently the hotel staff member swiped their card into a reader and made a duplicate card and used the security cameras to get their pin number.

I will only use credit at hotels and only cash at restaurants. Restaurant workers are notorious for using card readers to store the info and then steal it.

Also, I never use any portable or free standing ATM machine ever. Anyone can own one and set it up, you don't have to be a bank or a credit union. They have done studies and news reports on how the mob and gangs use them.

This is all true but you can dispute the charges if you didnt make them...Same as a credit card... The bank will refund the money..

Plus at my bank anyway, I cant use my card in other states unless I use the pin number, I have to call and let them know when I leave and when I return... Happened everytime we went to California, and it used to piss me off till I called the bank and they explained it..

tinaz said:

Plus at my bank anyway, I cant use my card in other states unless I use the pin number, I have to call and let them know when I leave and when I return... Happened everytime we went to California, and it used to piss me off till I called the bank and they explained it..

that was my bit of major legistration, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!

and the very laws that prevent me from havin a bank account

or a credit buildin creditcard, and i'm so happy without those blues

KingBAD said:

tinaz said:

Plus at my bank anyway, I cant use my card in other states unless I use the pin number, I have to call and let them know when I leave and when I return... Happened everytime we went to California, and it used to piss me off till I called the bank and they explained it..

that was my bit of major legistration, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!

and the very laws that prevent me from havin a bank account

or a credit buildin creditcard, and i'm so happy without those blues

I not trying to be funny or a spelling nazi, but do you mean Legislation? Do explain!!

tinaz said:

KingBAD said:

that was my bit of major legistration, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!

and the very laws that prevent me from havin a bank account

or a credit buildin creditcard, and i'm so happy without those blues

I not trying to be funny or a spelling nazi, but do you mean Legislation? Do explain!!

'Xactly...

let's just say i have a

criminal past, cross country

and it has to do with the finances

of others. (bank, card, schemes)

but i'm so over that now. without me

and people like me, you could do

whut you do without a pin# and be safe.

now if any 'strange' transactions show up

your stuff is put on hold FOR YOUR PROTECTION!!!

bet i spelled that right

KingBAD said:

tinaz said:

I not trying to be funny or a spelling nazi, but do you mean Legislation? Do explain!!

'Xactly...

let's just say i have a

criminal past, cross country

and it has to do with the finances

of others. (bank, card, schemes)

but i'm so over that now. without me

and people like me, you could do

whut you do without a pin# and be safe.

now if any 'strange' transactions show up

your stuff is put on hold FOR YOUR PROTECTION!!!

bet i spelled that right

Well you are certainly an interesting guy! Seriously, banks should hire you to teach them about schemes... Or you should write a book...