imago said:

I'm strange in that sometimes I fee a great deal of empathy, while other times, I know that I should, but I don't feel anything.

I am like this as well ... took years to become comfortable with it

I don't see it as so strange now nor do I feel bad/quilty about it ~ it is what it is

Well, I guess there are two possibilities:

1. Pity, as well as all other emotions, did not exist in the beginning, but through millions of years of evolution, for some reason we went from "Survival of the Fittest" whereby it was kill or be killed, to human beings that have an endless range of emotions. I can understand how an emotion like anger could have evolved, because anger triggers various body and chemical mechanisms that are useful in defense but do not appear in a natural, calm state. But I can't think of a single reason why humans would have evolved an emotion like pity. So, that leaves possibility #2;

2. This is the way God made us.

I firmly believe in possibility #2.

RodeoSchro said:

Well, I guess there are two possibilities:

1. Pity, as well as all other emotions, did not exist in the beginning, but through millions of years of evolution, for some reason we went from "Survival of the Fittest" whereby it was kill or be killed, to human beings that have an endless range of emotions. I can understand how an emotion like anger could have evolved, because anger triggers various body and chemical mechanisms that are useful in defense but do not appear in a natural, calm state. But I can't think of a single reason why humans would have evolved an emotion like pity. So, that leaves possibility #2;

2. This is the way God made us.

I firmly believe in possibility #2.

Do you think God pities us?

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

RodeoSchro said:

Well, I guess there are two possibilities:

1. Pity, as well as all other emotions, did not exist in the beginning, but through millions of years of evolution, for some reason we went from "Survival of the Fittest" whereby it was kill or be killed, to human beings that have an endless range of emotions. I can understand how an emotion like anger could have evolved, because anger triggers various body and chemical mechanisms that are useful in defense but do not appear in a natural, calm state. But I can't think of a single reason why humans would have evolved an emotion like pity. So, that leaves possibility #2;

2. This is the way God made us.

I firmly believe in possibility #2.

Do you think God pities us?

Of course not. He loves us.

imago said:

I'm strange in that sometimes I fee a great deal of empathy, while other times, I know that I should, but I don't feel anything.

Same here.

Dave1992 said:

First I felt relieved to have done something, but moments later I started to feel extremely uncomfortable and angry with myself. I'm usually a very private person who I also very careful about and respecting other people's privacy. How could I assume my words would mend his pain? Who gave me the right to interfere and tamper with other people's lives? If someone had said those words to me I probably would even have felt a bit offended and hemmed in.

There is too little of this. Or perhaps it's rarity is what makes it so pure and meaningful. I guess it depends on how you view our existence: just another chemical/electrical reaction or some beautiful moment of human compassion. Either choice it really is the same thing.

I feel pity for you if you truly feel that way. Is this really how we want or should be? Scared, insular, ignorant?

You did a beautiful thing. You saw someone else's pain and offered comfort. If only the whole world worked like that.

MachT said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

Pity is destructive, Compassion is constructive.

Turn that pity into Compassion and you might feel differently inside about situations. People, every single one of us, have the answers inside.

Pity is feeling sorry for someone, Compassion is lending empathy and concern without making someone a victim.

Now if we could only ( we = people in general ) intentionally and actively switch self pity to SELF COMPASSION ~ what a wonderful and healthy switch that would/could ( is ! ) be

We can. We just need to take a little time to sit and think before we act. We have the ability to be both good and bad. For the most part we are indifferent.

RodeoSchro said:

Well, I guess there are two possibilities:

1. Pity, as well as all other emotions, did not exist in the beginning, but through millions of years of evolution, for some reason we went from "Survival of the Fittest" whereby it was kill or be killed, to human beings that have an endless range of emotions. I can understand how an emotion like anger could have evolved, because anger triggers various body and chemical mechanisms that are useful in defense but do not appear in a natural, calm state. But I can't think of a single reason why humans would have evolved an emotion like pity. So, that leaves possibility #2;

2. This is the way God made us.

I firmly believe in possibility #2.

You don't think it could have anything to do with survival of our species? Care and nurture?

RodeoSchro said:

Personally, and on a side note, I wish more people would refer to their dictionaries when defining the meaning of words. Although we all have our own grasp of words and their meanings there are actual, documented explanations of each and every one. It's so much simpler and rewarding to just look up the words or terms you see people use or attempt to use yourself.

Pity, empathy, sympathy, compassion. They are all grouped together yet all mean something different.

If all you feel is pity then it's not your fault (to anyone this). Not being able to relate to a person, an event or a feeling is not a failing on the individual's part.

imago said:

I'm strange in that sometimes I fee a great deal of empathy, while other times, I know that I should, but I don't feel anything.

Yeah, I know a lot of people say stuff like this. My head must be wired funny though because I pretty much always feel empathy and pity for people - unless I just know the person is an asshole then I pretty much don't care and admittedly, sometimes even enjoy watching them experience misfortune and feel they deserve it. But that's extraordinarily rare; I can think of less than a handful of people during the course of my life that I've actually felt that way towards.

I even felt bad for Mister Hands for dying after he fucked that horse, which even I don't completely understand.

I never really feel pity....more so empathy or compassion.

And yet like Imago said, I'm sometimes impervious to what's going on.

Maybe at those times, we're more into ourselves..........

I edited the title and some words in the orginial post to replace "pity" with "empathy", because what I felt clearly falls under the common connotation of "empathy" rather than "pity", after having read your responses.

iloveannie said:

Dave1992 said:

First I felt relieved to have done something, but moments later I started to feel extremely uncomfortable and angry with myself. I'm usually a very private person who I also very careful about and respecting other people's privacy. How could I assume my words would mend his pain? Who gave me the right to interfere and tamper with other people's lives? If someone had said those words to me I probably would even have felt a bit offended and hemmed in.

There is too little of this. Or perhaps it's rarity is what makes it so pure and meaningful. I guess it depends on how you view our existence: just another chemical/electrical reaction or some beautiful moment of human compassion. Either choice it really is the same thing.

I feel pity for you if you truly feel that way. Is this really how we want or should be? Scared, insular, ignorant?

You did a beautiful thing. You saw someone else's pain and offered comfort. If only the whole world worked like that.

I wouldn't call myself ignorant or scared; maybe a little paranoid and shy when it comes to getting closer to others on an emotional level. I don't know whether this is how I want or should be, but I do know that most of the time I feel safer and more comfortable keeping a certain privacy and an emotional distance. That's mainly why I don't know how to react to and what to think of moments such as these, when something inside of me wants to connect and show love out of empathy.

I do think it's important and I will certainly not try to supress it, but I'm not sure whether I would be able to be so "open" towards all strangers I meet. It's probably some kind of self-protection mechanism.

Love they fellow man as they say. Not like imago does mind you

Then again I seem to remember also being told "Stranger Danger". Again that probably applies to imago

Sorry imago. Just jesting.

There was this bird on the bus yesterday that I felt pity for. Oh no, wait a minute, it was an erection. Yep, definately an erection. Coachman's Lob as they say.

iloveannie said:

There was this bird on the bus yesterday that I felt pity for. Oh no, wait a minute, it was an erection. Yep, definately an erection. Coachman's Lob as they say.

I know that feeling. Makes you want to connect with them, on a very deep level, aye?

Dave1992 said:

Pomade said:

Dave1992 said:

I know that feeling. Makes you want to connect with them, on a verydeep damp level, aye?

Fixed it for ya...

It's damp on that deep level anyway!

Oh lord, the org...

Dave1992 said:

Pomade said:

Dave1992 said: Fixed it for ya...

It's damp on that deep level anyway!

Oh lord, the org...

POMADE

DAVE1992

PurpleJedi said:

Dave1992 said:

It's damp on that deep level anyway!

Oh lord, the org...

POMADE

DAVE1992

PUT EM ON THE LIST PUT EM ON THE LIST

tinaz said:

PurpleJedi said:

POMADE

DAVE1992

PUT EM ON THE LIST PUT EM ON THE LIST

...not yet...not yet...

PurpleJedi said:

tinaz said:

PUT EM ON THE LIST PUT EM ON THE LIST

...not yet...not yet...

PurpleJedi said:

Dave1992 said:

It's damp on that deep level anyway!

Oh lord, the org...

POMADE

DAVE1992

Pity us, we're guilty sinners...

i think that was nice to acknowledge the man that was crying. who knows what he had on his plate, at least he knew someone cared if only briefly