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Thread started 01/03/12 12:04am

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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An inquiry...

The following rant is an inquiry into human psyche..

I am recently troubled. When I think about this one girl in my class, I wonder why sometimes this girl is so popular.

Let's call her "Kim". And she is the most arrogant woman I've ever seen in my life.

At first, I thought she was cool because she was Iranian, and had a very exotic looka about her. I'm also part Iranian, so I thought that would be a good point of conversation. But she wasn't sweet or friendly like the other Iranian girls i know. I haven't spoken to her much, but in the brief moments i have spoken with her, she's colder than ice. I've seen her speak very coldly to other people...and it didn't sit well with me. She can be very much a snob, and from what I can tell, loves no one but herself.

She also sorta prides herself in her resemblance to Kim Kardashian. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to look good, what peeves me is...she actually reveres this woman as a hero. A woman who has done nothing aside from introducing low quality clothing and whore makeup to the masses.

And yet, this girl is very popular. I think a lot of young men in the class really like her, and unsurprisingly, is very friendly with them, but very cold to a lot of girls in the class.

Now, perhaps I am a slightly jealous of her popularity, so don't be a fucking smartass and point that out. I have formulated my own opinion of her and you're free to develop yours on what I've told you about her.

In all honesty, I wouldn't want to be her. I don't have a clique to belong to, nor do I care to belond to. I kinda mirgrate from group to group and i pick up friends along the way. I don't have to pledge loyalty to anyone, or snub anybody because a group doesn't approve.

But I want to understand...

Why is this woman popular? Why do these undesirable qualities make her attractive? More specifically, why do men find these qualities attractive?

I would appreciate some good feedback from the experienced, revered women and men of this forum.

Query over.

[Edited 1/3/12 10:27am]

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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Reply #1 posted 01/03/12 12:34am

mltijchr

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maybe she simply wants/craves confirmation or "validation" from the young men in her class because she values that above all else.

she probably also knows that if she's "very friendly" or "flirty" with those young men, they will reciprocate in kind; apparently at least a few have..

there is probably some real level of INSECURITY on her part. she ought to understand that she can be friends with you - or at least "civil" & "polite" & her being that way with you or any other woman wouldn't undermine whatever attention she's seeking from the males in the class.

plus, unfortunately.. in some cases, some people are simply.. bad people. they let a (negative?) life experience - or several of them - define who they are & how they behave. it's much easier to have the mentality of "well, this bad thing happened to me.. I'm going to wear it like a 'badge of honor' & use that as my motivation/justification for being rude/cold to others.." for a lot of people, it IS easier to be bad/mean to others. when you think about it, it doesn't take that much effort.

you should (also) take some solace in that others in the course - male or female - who have similar values to yours.. they won't be that impressed with this woman either, & will likely hesitate to pursue any type of rapport with this woman.

if you are really intrigued by her way of doing.. you might want to ask her what's up, point blank. she might just blow you off again, though.

in any event, I'm sure you already know that you have better/more important things to do with your time & energy than spend them on this apparently very shallow person.

I'll see you tonight..
in ALL MY DREAMS..
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Reply #2 posted 01/03/12 12:36am

Cerebus

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This is the org, dude. I was going to post the titles of some of the other current, ongoing threads, but I think "this is the org, dude", kind of makes my point. In other words, we're no less broken than the person you're posting about and our answers are likely to be of very little to no real help once more than three or four people have posted. lol

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Reply #3 posted 01/03/12 12:55am

Lisa10

Some of the people I like to spend time with are cold/arrogant/deluded. But I like them for other reasons. And as long as I don't have to spend every waking hour with them it works.
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Reply #4 posted 01/03/12 1:03am

Visionnaire

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

The following rant is an inquiry into human psyche..

I am recently troubled. When I think about this one girl in my class, I wonder why sometimes this girl is so popular.

Let's call her "Kim". And she is the most arrogant woman I've ever seen in my life.

At first, I thought she was cool because she was Iranian, and had a very exotic looka about her. I'm also part Iranian, so I thought that would be a good point of conversation. But she wasn't sweet or friendly like the other Iranian girls i know. I haven't spoken to her much, but in the brief moments i have spoken with her, she's colder than ice. I've seen her speak very coldly to other people...and it didn't sit well with me. She can be very much a snob, and from what I can tell, loves no one but herself.

She also sorta prides herself in her resemblance to Kim Kardashian. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to look good, what peeves me is...she actually reveres this woman as a hero. A woman who has done nothing aside from introducing low quality clothing and whore makeup to the masses.

And yet, this girl is very popular. I think a lot of young men in the class really like her, and unsurprisingly, is very friendly with them, but very cold to a lot of girls in the class.

Now, perhaps I am a slightly jealous of her popularity, so don't be a fucking smartass and point that out. I have formulated my own opinion of her and you're free to develop yours on what I've told you about her.

In all honesty, I wouldn't want to be her. I don't have a clique to belong to, nor do I care to belond to. I kinda mirgrate from group to group and i pick up friends along the way. I don't have to pledge loyalty to anyone, or snub anybody because a group doesn't approve.

But I want to understand...

Why is this woman popular? Why do these undesirable qualities make her attractive? More specifically, why do men find these qualities attractive?

I would appreciate some good feedback from the experienced, revered women of this forum.

Query over.


I wanna hear from the not-so-revered women of this forum. I think that even tho their answers won't be as insightful, they'll be alot more provocatively stimulating.
I'd call some of 'em out by name, by the truth is, I'm a scholarly gentleman.
But they know who are.
They're the ones who keep sending me those illicit orgnotes.
So, c'mon, ladies.... this is your chance to shine.
Time to chime in your against-the-grain thoughts, conjectures & opinions, ya slutty buncha loppy-ass cunts... lol

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Reply #5 posted 01/03/12 1:26am

Mephiles

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A guy could be attracted to her for several reasons. In general most guys, excluding myself :p, see a nice body and instantly think of sexual attraction. I personally don't think anything of it. People are going to think what they want.

I do have a problem with her personality as you describe it. Again, judging from the outside looking in, it seems like she's created this "I'm top notch" hard to get persona. A male likes the thrill of a conquer. It's weird to go into extreme detail. But there is a level of satisfaction that a man seeks in regards to women. Maybe they flock to "Kim" because they simply like the thrill. Or maybe some guys are just into that weird type of stuff.

At the end of the day, who knows? Great topic
Have u had ur + today?
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Reply #6 posted 01/03/12 2:56am

ThisOne

perhaps its her confidence that others find attractive rather than the type of person that she is

that often happens with young ppl

mailto:www.iDon'tThinkSo.com.Uranus
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Reply #7 posted 01/03/12 6:39am

nd33

Don't read too deeply into the male attention she's getting. From what you've said of her personality, she don't sound too cool. It's prob just because she has a sexy body and a cute face. We males like that kinda shit lol

You can bet that if she wasn't hot physically, she wouldnt be getting any attention from the guys with those attitude issues.

Music, sweet music, I wish I could caress and...kiss, kiss...
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Reply #8 posted 01/03/12 7:00am

paintedlady

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You ever hear of the "pretty girl syndrome" ?

Its were a girl from and early age is told she is pretty on a daily basis and by EVERY ONE around her... starting with her parents. They make mention of her beauty daily.... she grows confident and learns to focus on being beautiful on the outside and owns it.

She learns from an early age that her beauty alone will grant her all she desires because she's one of the "beautiful" people.... no personality is needed on her part. She's got it like that.sexy Men around her confirm the notion of outer beauty is everything, so she never focuses on her inner qualities.

Now women like this tend to be VERY competitive. Why? Because there is always a prettier girl.... always. She must be THE prettiest.... her world will crash to a screaming halt once a better looking woman enters the room and all her power is stripped from her.

Now an "ugly duckling" will not be as competitive because she will learn to sell herself and use different tools to attract men. The "ugly duckling" will learn to focus on other tools of attraction because her looks may not grant her much attention at all.... so she learns to CHARM men with her personality, and no "pretty woman" (like the one previously mentioned) no matter how pretty will shake her. Another woman who is can get attentions through her wit and charm will cause her to sweat, but not the looker because in her mind, the "pretty girl" is only shallow and empty.

Its all a system of competition to get a mate, old as time itself and one that many women thrive in. That arrogant snobby pretty girl is competing with you and every other girl in the room.

Funny thing, a woman doesn't have to consider herself "hot" to feel like she has an advantage over a "hot" woman.

That girl in your class is only doing what her momma taught her to do. nod

[Edited 1/3/12 7:05am]

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Reply #9 posted 01/03/12 7:45am

Genesia

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High school sucks. shrug

We don’t mourn artists because we knew them. We mourn them because they helped us know ourselves.
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Reply #10 posted 01/03/12 9:09am

jon1967

what about all the good things you are .. let the other girl nonsense go .

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Reply #11 posted 01/03/12 9:17am

PunkMistress

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jon1967 said:

what about all the good things you are .. let the other girl nonsense go .

I think Thru is well aware of her own good qualities (of which there are many), and is simply seeking to understand a phenomenon that she is not a part of but which disturbs her on some level.

It's what you make it.
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Reply #12 posted 01/03/12 9:32am

jon1967

PunkMistress said:

jon1967 said:

what about all the good things you are .. let the other girl nonsense go .

I think Thru is well aware of her own good qualities (of which there are many), and is simply seeking to understand a phenomenon that she is not a part of but which disturbs her on some level.

You think shes aware or u know shes aware .. and thank u for letting me know what you think you know.My ez going point is dont let it disturb you.

doc it hurts when i do this .. then dont do that

if it distrubs u to think about it dont think about it ..


[Edited 1/3/12 9:40am]

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Reply #13 posted 01/03/12 9:36am

KoolEaze

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Probably because she looks hot and lots of people either want to fuck her or be like her.

It´s not rocket science. lol

" I´d rather be a stank ass hoe because I´m not stupid. Oh my goodness! I got more drugs! I´m always funny dude...I´m hilarious! Are we gonna smoke?"
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Reply #14 posted 01/03/12 9:41am

PurpleJedi

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I refuse to judge the girl on your post alone.

hmph!

Show me her sex tape, then we can talk.

whistling

By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory!
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Reply #15 posted 01/03/12 9:46am

PunkMistress

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jon1967 said:

PunkMistress said:

I think Thru is well aware of her own good qualities (of which there are many), and is simply seeking to understand a phenomenon that she is not a part of but which disturbs her on some level.

You think shes aware or u know shes aware .. and thank u for letting me know what you think you know.My ez going point is dont let it disturb you.

doc it hurts when i do this .. then dont do that

if it distrubs u to think about it dont think about it ..


[Edited 1/3/12 9:40am]

You're welcome! smile

From what I know of her over the last couple of years, I think I know that she knows. Yup.

It's what you make it.
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Reply #16 posted 01/03/12 9:49am

jon1967

PunkMistress said:

jon1967 said:

You think shes aware or u know shes aware .. and thank u for letting me know what you think you know.My ez going point is dont let it disturb you.

doc it hurts when i do this .. then dont do that

if it distrubs u to think about it dont think about it ..


[Edited 1/3/12 9:40am]

You're welcome! smile

From what I know of her over the last couple of years, I think I know that she knows. Yup.

now i know what u think kool .. not that i dont blieve you punk shes blessed to have u at her back .. jus sayin dont let it disturb u .. whats pinks song " fuckin perfect.

[Edited 1/3/12 11:12am]

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Reply #17 posted 01/03/12 10:26am

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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Thanks for all the responses, ladies and gents. I'll modify the OP to include men as well.

And too all the men who want to know what she looks like. She has a face and hair similar to Kim K, but she's actually the shortest girl in class, and a little chubby around the edges. She looks decent to me though.

PurpleJedi said:

I refuse to judge the girl on your post alone.

hmph!

Show me her sex tape, then we can talk.

whistling

She doesn't have one...yet. lol

paintedlady said:

You ever hear of the "pretty girl syndrome" ?

Its were a girl from and early age is told she is pretty on a daily basis and by EVERY ONE around her... starting with her parents. They make mention of her beauty daily.... she grows confident and learns to focus on being beautiful on the outside and owns it.

She learns from an early age that her beauty alone will grant her all she desires because she's one of the "beautiful" people.... no personality is needed on her part. She's got it like that.sexy Men around her confirm the notion of outer beauty is everything, so she never focuses on her inner qualities.

Now women like this tend to be VERY competitive. Why? Because there is always a prettier girl.... always. She must be THE prettiest.... her world will crash to a screaming halt once a better looking woman enters the room and all her power is stripped from her.

Now an "ugly duckling" will not be as competitive because she will learn to sell herself and use different tools to attract men. The "ugly duckling" will learn to focus on other tools of attraction because her looks may not grant her much attention at all.... so she learns to CHARM men with her personality, and no "pretty woman" (like the one previously mentioned) no matter how pretty will shake her. Another woman who is can get attentions through her wit and charm will cause her to sweat, but not the looker because in her mind, the "pretty girl" is only shallow and empty.

Its all a system of competition to get a mate, old as time itself and one that many women thrive in. That arrogant snobby pretty girl is competing with you and every other girl in the room.

Funny thing, a woman doesn't have to consider herself "hot" to feel like she has an advantage over a "hot" woman.

That girl in your class is only doing what her momma taught her to do. nod

hmmm

You have given me a lot to mull over, painted. So you think she's got the same syndrome Snow White's evil step mother had? And progated by her mother? Sounds about right..although I'd say she's also like Regina George from "Mean Girls". But that's the thing...there's always another girl out there who's prettier...lol

But yeah, I think it just comes down to she's pretty and men like that kinda stuff. Nothing too surprising.

And I revere all the women on this forum, hence why I refered to them as such.

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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Reply #18 posted 01/03/12 10:27am

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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mltijchr said:

maybe she simply wants/craves confirmation or "validation" from the young men in her class because she values that above all else.

she probably also knows that if she's "very friendly" or "flirty" with those young men, they will reciprocate in kind; apparently at least a few have..

there is probably some real level of INSECURITY on her part. she ought to understand that she can be friends with you - or at least "civil" & "polite" & her being that way with you or any other woman wouldn't undermine whatever attention she's seeking from the males in the class.

plus, unfortunately.. in some cases, some people are simply.. bad people. they let a (negative?) life experience - or several of them - define who they are & how they behave. it's much easier to have the mentality of "well, this bad thing happened to me.. I'm going to wear it like a 'badge of honor' & use that as my motivation/justification for being rude/cold to others.." for a lot of people, it IS easier to be bad/mean to others. when you think about it, it doesn't take that much effort.

you should (also) take some solace in that others in the course - male or female - who have similar values to yours.. they won't be that impressed with this woman either, & will likely hesitate to pursue any type of rapport with this woman.

if you are really intrigued by her way of doing.. you might want to ask her what's up, point blank. she might just blow you off again, though.

in any event, I'm sure you already know that you have better/more important things to do with your time & energy than spend them on this apparently very shallow person.

Thank you for your input. I appreciate it. biggrin

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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Reply #19 posted 01/03/12 10:55am

TotalANXiousNE
SS

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How old are you?

Cuz the men I know, like ALL of the men I know, do not find snobbery attractive.

Anyways. Don't give it another thought. Be you and don't kiss her ass.

The boys like her cuz she's nice to look at, but that only gets you so far.

I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #20 posted 01/03/12 11:45am

jon1967

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Reply #21 posted 01/03/12 1:26pm

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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TotalANXiousNESS said:

How old are you?

Cuz the men I know, like ALL of the men I know, do not find snobbery attractive.

Anyways. Don't give it another thought. Be you and don't kiss her ass.

The boys like her cuz she's nice to look at, but that only gets you so far.

I'm 21.

And the guys who aren't married in my class are also in their early to mid 20's.

Thank you for the advice. smile

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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Reply #22 posted 01/03/12 1:30pm

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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jon1967 said:

Nah, I don't do cat fights.

lol

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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Reply #23 posted 01/03/12 6:02pm

Ace

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

She can be very much a snob, and from what I can tell, loves no one but herself.

I'll bet she has (at least) family that she loves. Probably other people, too. Maybe even pets.

She also sorta prides herself in her resemblance to Kim Kardashian. While there is nothing wrong with wanting to look good, what peeves me is...she actually reveres this woman as a hero.

Okay, I'm right with ya, here. The fact that people are trying to emulate folks like the Kardashians is a sad, sad indicator of where we are as a society. That said, whatcha gonna do about it? shrug

But I want to understand...

Why is this woman popular? Why do these undesirable qualities make her attractive? More specifically, why do men find these qualities attractive?

Sounds like she's good-looking. People like good-looking people. shrug

I would appreciate some good feedback from the experienced, revered women and men of this forum.

Don't know how revered I am, but I do have some experience:

Try and find the good in people and practice empathy. Don't waste time and energy on envy and/or trying to change some things that won't change in our lifetime (read "the fact that the vast majority of the populace is entranced by looks"). Don't look to others for validation. Love yourself and follow The Golden Rule.

hug

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Reply #24 posted 01/03/12 6:21pm

NDRU

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young people are attracted to extremely superficial qualities, and it only partially lessens with age. All your life you'll find un-worthy people getting too much attention.

Part of it is just putting yourself out there. You can't expect everyone to look at you and say "that person quietly has good character, lets all celebrate that!!!" They are going to notice extreme sexuality, beauty, humor, obnoxiousness, wealth...

If you want to be noticed/popular, make more noise in some way

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Reply #25 posted 01/03/12 6:23pm

NDRU

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^^^but that involves putting yourself out there for potential criticism, such as this girl is getting in this thread! You have to be able to handle that!

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Reply #26 posted 01/03/12 6:59pm

Ace

NDRU said:

young people are attracted to extremely superficial qualities, and it only partially lessens with age. All your life you'll find un-worthy people getting too much attention.

yeahthat

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Reply #27 posted 01/03/12 8:55pm

ThruTheEyesOfW
onder

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Ace said:

ThruTheEyesOfWonder said:

She can be very much a snob, and from what I can tell, loves no one but herself.

I'll bet she has (at least) family that she loves. Probably other people, too. Maybe even pets.

Sounds like she's good-looking. People like good-looking people. shrug

I would appreciate some good feedback from the experienced, revered women and men of this forum.

Don't know how revered I am, but I do have some experience:

Try and find the good in people and practice empathy. Don't waste time and energy on envy and/or trying to change some things that won't change in our lifetime (read "the fact that the vast majority of the populace is entranced by looks"). Don't look to others for validation. Love yourself and follow The Golden Rule.

hug

Thank you very much, Ace. hug

I don't care much for people's opinion, I'm comfortable with myself. I try to be a good person, and follow the Golden Rule.I haven't done anything to this girl, I've tried being friendly with her but just gotten the snub. Oh well...shrug

I posted this subject because I'm curious why people like others who treat them like this. 'Tis all.

The salvation of man is through love and in love. - Dr. V. Frankl

"When you close your heart, you close your mind." - Michael Jackson (Man In The Mirror)

"I don't need anger management, I need people to stop pissing me off" lol
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