I am very sorry for your loss .

so sorry for you and your family, i know this must be very difficult.

GottaLetitgo said:

...writing is therapeutic for me and you are some of my favorite people who I have never met This is a safe place for me to put this stuff down and I appreciate it.

And may it continue to be. You have my utmost respect and I send you energy and light in these emotional days.

GottaLetitgo said:

Thank you for all of your kind words and prayers. My father passed away at 5:45 this afternoon after a long brave battle. I was in the room with my my Mom and older brother when he passed. His blood pressure had been very low today and there was starting to be serious apnea between his breaths. He would go 10 seconds or more between breaths. We talked to my father throughout telling him how much we loved him and a few minutes before he passed, we saw him move his hand almost as if to wave. My mom opened the window screen because she had heard that a soul sometimes gets trapped unless you open a window. I told my brave father not to be afraid and I held his hand tight as I watched him take his last breaths. I saw his very last breath, which was not a toubled breath but a calm one, and then waited for another. After about 30 seconds I realized another breath was not coming. I told my brother that I thought he was gone and we both agreed after watching him a few more seeconds that he was gone. His looked extremely peaceful.

We never did put my father on the morphine drip. We decided after last night's drama to continue doing what we were doing as long as my father was not in pain.

My father will always be an irreplaceable part of my life. This will be a hard time but I have started the MPP (Make Papa Proud) campaign with my family where we are going to make every effort to have farewell ceremonies that will make him proud.

Thank you all for caring and for your support.

I am very sure that your father is so very proud of the way you have expressed yourself during this time. Loving to your family in this time and may your love and memories guide you through your time of grief

I just saw this... I am so sorry to hear...

Your family will be in my prayers.

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So so sorry.

Remember the times you laughed...

Very sorry for your loss

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm sorry for your loss

I'm very sorry.

Sorry to hear about all of this.

So sorry to hear about this.

Serious said:

ditto. my condolences.

May he rest peacefully.

R.I.P

From the bottom of my heart, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all of the kind words.

Things feel so surreal right now but we're doing the best we can. My family is really coming together to plan a ceremony befitting my father. We have picked out everything for my Dad, the suit, the coffin, the plot. Coffin shopping is surreal, like buying a car in a twisted way. You're sitting there looking at all of these different options, from a $1000 really basic coffin to what the funeral director called the "Michael Jackson Coffin" a $16,000 model that is the Cadillac of coffins. And we picked out something nice but in our mind we all felt that if my Dad were shopping for any of us, he would have bought the $16,000 one. The man was generous to a fault and always bought "the best", no matter how impractical.

We are holding the visitation the day after Christmas and the funeral the following day. In the meantime, we are trying to create a meaningful Christmas as possible for the 6 grandchildren.

My father always loved Christmas. When I was growing up, I always remember waking up on Christmas morning and feeling so happy and blessed to see the gifts from Santa. I did not find out until much later on that for the first several years of my life that in many cases my parents had to borrow money, in some cases only be able to secure funds day before, to make Christmas happen.

As my father became more established in his career and we all grew up and had children of our own, Christmas has become larger and larger. Each year, my Mom spends pretty much the whole year shopping for a gift here and a gift there, always finding great sales, and makes sure each of the grandchildren have the exact same amount. My Dad would look so proud and happy as all of the grandchildren and all of us children opened our gifts. He generally would not open any of his until everyone else was done because for him, it was about watching the joy that we all had. For him, Christmas was always about giving and nothing made him happier than watching us open presents.

So we've tried to have a "normal" Christmas for the grandchildren but it has been hard. Nobody is concerned about gifts this year, I think we all just want the feeling that this holiday produces. And despite all the Christmas music and decoration it just all feels kind of empty. We just want Dad back. We are of course looking to the larger and religious meaning of Christmas in accordance to our beliefs but once again it is so hard. I have prayed so much this week and feel comforted but so confused.

But people have been so nice. The flowers sent and the food sent over and all of the kind words does show us that there is such goodness and kindness in the world. I appreciate all of the kind words on this thread so much. Thank you.

^^

Very moving read, thanks for sharing. Your dad was a wonderful man and in your heart and the hearts of everybody else who loved him he will forever stay with you .

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So sorry to here of your sad loss, our prayers are with you and your family at this difficult time...

Sorry for your lost. I, too lost my father, and this would have been his 68th birthday on the 29th of this month.

May Your Father rest in peace..and please keep strong for your family!

Sorry for reading this thread pretty late.

My prayers are with you!

GottaLetitgo said:

From the bottom of my heart, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all of the kind words.

Things feel so surreal right now but we're doing the best we can. My family is really coming together to plan a ceremony befitting my father. We have picked out everything for my Dad, the suit, the coffin, the plot. Coffin shopping is surreal, like buying a car in a twisted way. You're sitting there looking at all of these different options, from a $1000 really basic coffin to what the funeral director called the "Michael Jackson Coffin" a $16,000 model that is the Cadillac of coffins. And we picked out something nice but in our mind we all felt that if my Dad were shopping for any of us, he would have bought the $16,000 one. The man was generous to a fault and always bought "the best", no matter how impractical.

We are holding the visitation the day after Christmas and the funeral the following day. In the meantime, we are trying to create a meaningful Christmas as possible for the 6 grandchildren.

My father always loved Christmas. When I was growing up, I always remember waking up on Christmas morning and feeling so happy and blessed to see the gifts from Santa. I did not find out until much later on that for the first several years of my life that in many cases my parents had to borrow money, in some cases only be able to secure funds day before, to make Christmas happen.

As my father became more established in his career and we all grew up and had children of our own, Christmas has become larger and larger. Each year, my Mom spends pretty much the whole year shopping for a gift here and a gift there, always finding great sales, and makes sure each of the grandchildren have the exact same amount. My Dad would look so proud and happy as all of the grandchildren and all of us children opened our gifts. He generally would not open any of his until everyone else was done because for him, it was about watching the joy that we all had. For him, Christmas was always about giving and nothing made him happier than watching us open presents.

So we've tried to have a "normal" Christmas for the grandchildren but it has been hard. Nobody is concerned about gifts this year, I think we all just want the feeling that this holiday produces. And despite all the Christmas music and decoration it just all feels kind of empty. We just want Dad back. We are of course looking to the larger and religious meaning of Christmas in accordance to our beliefs but once again it is so hard. I have prayed so much this week and feel comforted but so confused.

But people have been so nice. The flowers sent and the food sent over and all of the kind words does show us that there is such goodness and kindness in the world. I appreciate all of the kind words on this thread so much. Thank you.

My heart goes out to you. This is an especially difficult time to lose a loved one...my mom died 2 days before Thanksgiving back in '05,

Thank you for sharing your special memories with us. May your dad RIP.

babynoz said:

GottaLetitgo said:

From the bottom of my heart, I cannot tell you how much I appreciate all of the kind words.

Things feel so surreal right now but we're doing the best we can. My family is really coming together to plan a ceremony befitting my father. We have picked out everything for my Dad, the suit, the coffin, the plot. Coffin shopping is surreal, like buying a car in a twisted way. You're sitting there looking at all of these different options, from a $1000 really basic coffin to what the funeral director called the "Michael Jackson Coffin" a $16,000 model that is the Cadillac of coffins. And we picked out something nice but in our mind we all felt that if my Dad were shopping for any of us, he would have bought the $16,000 one. The man was generous to a fault and always bought "the best", no matter how impractical.

We are holding the visitation the day after Christmas and the funeral the following day. In the meantime, we are trying to create a meaningful Christmas as possible for the 6 grandchildren.

My father always loved Christmas. When I was growing up, I always remember waking up on Christmas morning and feeling so happy and blessed to see the gifts from Santa. I did not find out until much later on that for the first several years of my life that in many cases my parents had to borrow money, in some cases only be able to secure funds day before, to make Christmas happen.

As my father became more established in his career and we all grew up and had children of our own, Christmas has become larger and larger. Each year, my Mom spends pretty much the whole year shopping for a gift here and a gift there, always finding great sales, and makes sure each of the grandchildren have the exact same amount. My Dad would look so proud and happy as all of the grandchildren and all of us children opened our gifts. He generally would not open any of his until everyone else was done because for him, it was about watching the joy that we all had. For him, Christmas was always about giving and nothing made him happier than watching us open presents.

So we've tried to have a "normal" Christmas for the grandchildren but it has been hard. Nobody is concerned about gifts this year, I think we all just want the feeling that this holiday produces. And despite all the Christmas music and decoration it just all feels kind of empty. We just want Dad back. We are of course looking to the larger and religious meaning of Christmas in accordance to our beliefs but once again it is so hard. I have prayed so much this week and feel comforted but so confused.

But people have been so nice. The flowers sent and the food sent over and all of the kind words does show us that there is such goodness and kindness in the world. I appreciate all of the kind words on this thread so much. Thank you.

My heart goes out to you. This is an especially difficult time to lose a loved one...my mom died 2 days before Thanksgiving back in '05,

Thank you for sharing your special memories with us. May your dad RIP.