It's about time for everybody's office xmas party. Any funny drunken office christmas party memories? Our parties are boring.

one word: condoms

and booze...

JoeTyler said:

one word: condoms

and booze...

do you work at a bar? most bar xmas parties are off the chain!!!

mannotamyth said:

JoeTyler said:

one word: condoms

and booze...

do you work at a bar? most bar xmas parties are off the chain!!!

no, at a restaurant, and being the co-owner (sort of)...

My office "Holiday gathering" tends to be boring.

Until the owners leave and the stragglers REALLY start to get their drink on!!!

Oddly enough, we are actually having one this year. (It's been awhile.)

Our company usually does a big, family-friendly gig on a weekend. Twenty years, I've worked here - and I've never gone. It's totally geared toward children which, since I don't have any, I am not driving 80 miles round trip to the office on a weekend. (I've never gone to the company picnic, for the same reason.)

Next Thursday afternoon, the honcho of our division is having a party at a local resort. I will go because, duh, it starts at 2:30 and is basically an early out from work. It's also on my way home, so fine.

I am generally not a fan of forced merriment. But I will play the game because we are undergoing another regime change and I'm no stupe.

I work from home, so I'll just get drunk and make an ass of myself alone.

Efan said:

I work from home, so I'll just get drunk and make an ass of myself alone.

At least you'll be in good company.

Genesia said:

Efan said:

I work from home, so I'll just get drunk and make an ass of myself alone.

At least you'll be in good company.

I hope I don't make any inappropriate advances to myself.

yes! should be a ton of fun again. i love hanging out with my co-workers when we aren't scrambling to get work out the door.

Michael's Boss holds a small gathering @ his home ... It's an amazing relaxed and super fun event with killer foods n drinks

Efan said:

Genesia said:

At least you'll be in good company.

I hope I don't make any inappropriate advances to myself.

Yeah, you don't want to be the office slut.

[Edited 12/6/11 10:28am]

Thankfully we don't have one. When I worked at the museum in Chicago they were fun -- drinks & dinner at the Director's house, killer original art on the walls. The place I work now is lame and there is no way in hell I want to hang out with my co-workers after hours -- having to deal with them during the day is bad enough.

http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2011/11/the-grub-street-guide-to-office-party-drinking.html

i used to try to get laid at them ...

they were fun ....

but i am not talking .... no more information from me ... hehe

Efan said:

I work from home, so I'll just get drunk and make an ass of myself alone.

Don't forget to feel yourself up in the copy room!

We always pay for our own food at our work Xmas gatherings, this year we dedcided to adopt a family instead of spending the money on ourselves

I've already had my big one.

We all stayed in a lovely hotel (where the Prime Minister stayed on his hols last year) and she left us each a luxury food hamper on our beds. We all had drinks in the bar, a 5 course meal and then went into a lounge-room where we carried on drinking into the wee hours. Everything was paid for and we had a really, really good time.

This was on Friday. I usually look after the shop Saturday mornings, but she changed the office hours to 1 - 5 for me so I could drink as much as I wanted and have time to sleep it off.

We also have a meeting on the 22nd, where we all exchange secret santa gifts and will probably drink champagne. All the corporate gifts we receive during the year are raffled off between the staff.

My boss is lovely.

jone70 said:

Thankfully we don't have one. When I worked at the museum in Chicago they were fun -- drinks & dinner at the Director's house, killer original art on the walls. The place I work now is lame and there is no way in hell I want to hang out with my co-workers after hours -- having to deal with them during the day is bad enough.

http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2011/11/the-grub-street-guide-to-office-party-drinking.html

That NYMag article is hilarious. I 'bout died when I read it last week.

The union X-mas parties used to be bomb but they've turned into these 'bring your kids to meet Santa' events that make me wretch. Some of my coworkers are annoying enough that I don't want to be around their kids. Besides I'd probably get drunk and tell lil' Susie how her mother managed to afford that new bike this year! Much more fun now to hang with friends in the city and get plastered.

Efan said:

Genesia said:

At least you'll be in good company.

I hope I don't make any inappropriate advances to myself.

Our holiday party will be held this Thursday during company hours. It will be at our local art museum and catered by some hoity toity "food art movement" restaurant to be followed by cookies. I really hope I don't have to brown bag it because I'm still hungry after the 2 bites they serve me on my plate. But whatever it is, I'm sure it will be delicious and I appreciate them having a party at all since we're going out of business.

And the best part...we get to go home afterwards instead of going back to work.

Oh, lawd. I just got an email. They're doing an ugly sweater day/holiday potluck.

Can somebody take this image and make it say, "Your holiday sweater makes Baby Jesus cry?"

[img:$uid]http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g216/rebecca8273/BabyJesusCry.jpg[/img:$uid]

OMG the Workhouse is throwing one for the artists!

This year I don't have to get drunk in my home studio and come back to work the following Monday to embarassing pics of me making out with Lola.

I'm pretty sure me and Mary will end up making fools of ourselves.

Just say NO to ugly sweater contests. You'll risk being the only one that shows up in a sweater and look like this asshole....

[img:$uid]http://i104.photobucket.com/albums/m193/thomissy/Christmas2007028.jpg[/img:$uid]

JuliePurplehead said:

Just say NO to ugly sweater contests. You'll risk being the only one that shows up in a sweater and look like this asshole....

[img:$uid]http://i104.photobucket.com/albums/m193/thomissy/Christmas2007028.jpg[/img:$uid]

But you're OUR cute asshole

Did you go around all day explaining to strangers why you were in that spiffy get up.

johnart said:

JuliePurplehead said:

Just say NO to ugly sweater contests. You'll risk being the only one that shows up in a sweater and look like this asshole....

[img:$uid]http://i104.photobucket.com/albums/m193/thomissy/Christmas2007028.jpg[/img:$uid]

But you're OUR cute asshole

Did you go around all day explaining to strangers why you were in that spiffy get up.

johnart said:

JuliePurplehead said:

Just say NO to ugly sweater contests. You'll risk being the only one that shows up in a sweater and look like this asshole....

[img:$uid]http://i104.photobucket.com/albums/m193/thomissy/Christmas2007028.jpg[/img:$uid]

But you're OUR cute asshole

Did you go around all day explaining to strangers why you were in that spiffy get up.

Thank goodness it was just an evening event! I borrowed the sweater vest and flannel from my mom. After I explained what I was borrowing it for, she was like "gee, thanks "

JuliePurplehead said:

johnart said:

But you're OUR cute asshole

Did you go around all day explaining to strangers why you were in that spiffy get up.

Thank goodness it was just an evening event! I borrowed the sweater vest and flannel from my mom. After I explained what I was borrowing it for, she was like "gee, thanks "

You look like you should be handling some Schwetty Balls.

johnart said:

JuliePurplehead said:

Thank goodness it was just an evening event! I borrowed the sweater vest and flannel from my mom. After I explained what I was borrowing it for, she was like "gee, thanks "

You look like you should be handling some Schwetty Balls.