So, since Turkey Day is almost here, I thought I would ask what is the most scandalous thing that ever happened at your house during Thanksgiving dinner?

A few Turkey Day's before I was born, my Uncle Teddy acted a fool at Thanksgiving (he did it every year, but this is the one I can talk about w/out having to use a whole bunch of expletives. This Turkey Day was held at my Great Aunt Charlotte's house. She was seditty to the max. Anyway, she had the preacher over as well as everyone in the family to her big old house that she just had renovated.

In comes Uncle Teddy, fresh off a 3 day bender with his accountant's soon to be ex wife (don't ask). Walks in, grab a plate, promptly samples the turkey, tells Aunt Charlotte it's as dried up as her ****** is and then some. Uncle Teddy then tells the preacher to get off his fat ass so he can have a seat.

Uncle Teddy starts eating and is offered some wine. He says no, cause it would interfere with the meds he is taking to clear up the clap he got from the deacon's wife.

Aunt Charlotte who had turned about 3 different shades of purple by this point, grabs her heart and says she feels like she is having a heart attack.

Aunt Charlotte is rushed to the hospital and turns out she is fine. Uncle Teddy and the preacher end up finishing dinner and according to Uncle Teddy, finishing up the night at a strip club.

So, who has stories?

[Edited 11/6/11 18:14pm]

Oh lawd, I remember this girl--we'll call her Terra.

Terra had slept with 3 of the men in her workcenter. That's all fine and dandy, other than the fact that she was married and her husband was away on a temperary tour of duty.

Anyways, he came back in early November, and being that we were all stationed in Germany and homesick, we did Thanksgiving dinner together as a gruop of displaced and semi-lonely holiday misfits.

Terra and her husband invites us all to dinner, and 2 of the people she invited had slept with her--unbeknownst to her husband of course.

Anyways, her hallway was very narrow, so her coat rack was up in the master bedroom behind the door if it was swung open. When we all entered the house and made our greetings, etc, both the two guys that were there knew exactly where to hang the coats and even pointed me in the direction of the masterbedroom with instructions "It's behind the door by the dresser."

Well, dinner was interresting.

Did her hubby find out?

scriptgirl said:

So, since Turkey Day is almost here, I thought I would ask what is the most scandalous thing that ever happened at your house during Thanksgiving dinner?

A few Turkey Day's before I was born, my Uncle Teddy acted a fool at Thanksgiving (he did it every year, but this is the one I can talk about w/out having to use a whole bunch of expletives. This Turkey Day was held at my Great Aunt Charlotte's house. She was seditty to the max. Anyway, she had the preacher over as well as everyone in the family to her big old house that she just had renovated.

In comes Uncle Teddy, fresh off a 3 day bender with his accountant's soon to be ex wife (don't ask). Walks in, grab a plate, promptly samples the turkey, tells Aunt Charlotte it's as dried up as her ****** is and then some. Uncle Teddy then tells the preacher to get off his fat ass so he can have a seat.

Uncle Teddy starts eating and is offered some wine. He says no, cause it would interfere with the meds he is taking to clear up the clap he got from the deacon's wife.

Aunt Charlotte who had turned about 3 different shades of purple by this point, grabs her heart and says she feels like she is having a heart attack.

Aunt Charlotte is rushed to the hospital and turns out she is fine. Uncle Teddy and the preacher end up finishing dinner and according to Uncle Teddy, finishing up the night at a strip club.

So, who has stories?

[Edited 11/6/11 18:14pm]

The return of the Drunk Uncle Teddy Chronicles

Aunt Ottie!

Interesting! Your family sounds somewhat fun. Mine is boring.

I do not have any scandalous thanksgiving stories. My family members live far away from me and we do not get in touch much.

Oh, I like him!

The few times that my family has even gotten together at Thanksgiving, there's been nothing wild going on. They're dull as hell.

Actually, I think some of my family members don't even call and invite me over at holidays because they're afraid I might embarass them. Oh well....fuck 'em. I'm the Uncle Teddy in my family.

Andy, baby!!!!!

Dalia, my family is more sedate since Uncle Teddy passed.

Maybe you will have some family drama this year for thanksgiving dinner? If you do, let us know.

I will miss Scndls' story about her aunt and the mac and cheese.

she needs to post that again

No real stories myself, I come from a small family which consisted mainly of "The Trio" and me, usually when the trio get together for any length of time, no matter the time of the year a major arguement is going to erupt which one thanksgiving resulted in Grammy taking the turkey she brought and herself home before dinner. It was never very entertaining or funny to me so I leave it at that.

imago said:

Oh lawd, I remember this girl--we'll call her Terra.

Terra had slept with 3 of the men in her workcenter. That's all fine and dandy, other than the fact that she was married and her husband was away on a temperary tour of duty.

Anyways, he came back in early November, and being that we were all stationed in Germany and homesick, we did Thanksgiving dinner together as a gruop of displaced and semi-lonely holiday misfits.

Terra and her husband invites us all to dinner, and 2 of the people she invited had slept with her--unbeknownst to her husband of course.

Anyways, her hallway was very narrow, so her coat rack was up in the master bedroom behind the door if it was swung open. When we all entered the house and made our greetings, etc, both the two guys that were there knew exactly where to hang the coats and even pointed me in the direction of the masterbedroom with instructions "It's behind the door by the dresser."

Well, dinner was interresting.

Woww How did people know they slept together?

BlackAdder7 said:

I will miss Scndls' story about her aunt and the mac and cheese.

I was thinking the very same! Let's pray Auntie keeps her paws out of SCNDLS'S mac & cheese and whatever else Auntie sees that she thinks needs "fixin." Knowin SCNDLS, Auntie'll pull back a nub.

scriptgirl said:

This Turkey Day was held at my Great Aunt Charlotte's house. She was seditty to the max. Anyway, she had the preacher over as well as everyone in the family to her big old house that she just had renovated.

[Edited 11/6/11 18:14pm]

I just had to laugh at that. Girl, you must be AA and have family from the south. The only other person I hear using that word to describe someone is my mother.

scriptgirl said:

So, since Turkey Day is almost here, I thought I would ask what is the most scandalous thing that ever happened at your house during Thanksgiving dinner?

A few Turkey Day's before I was born, my Uncle Teddy acted a fool at Thanksgiving (he did it every year, but this is the one I can talk about w/out having to use a whole bunch of expletives. This Turkey Day was held at my Great Aunt Charlotte's house. She was seditty to the max. Anyway, she had the preacher over as well as everyone in the family to her big old house that she just had renovated.

In comes Uncle Teddy, fresh off a 3 day bender with his accountant's soon to be ex wife (don't ask). Walks in, grab a plate, promptly samples the turkey, tells Aunt Charlotte it's as dried up as her ****** is and then some. Uncle Teddy then tells the preacher to get off his fat ass so he can have a seat.

Uncle Teddy starts eating and is offered some wine. He says no, cause it would interfere with the meds he is taking to clear up the clap he got from the deacon's wife.

Aunt Charlotte who had turned about 3 different shades of purple by this point, grabs her heart and says she feels like she is having a heart attack.

Aunt Charlotte is rushed to the hospital and turns out she is fine. Uncle Teddy and the preacher end up finishing dinner and according to Uncle Teddy, finishing up the night at a strip club.

So, who has stories?

[Edited 11/6/11 18:14pm]

okay, just read the rest.... girl you LYING!!!

He told them he got the clap from deacon's wife??? What do people say when he is cutting up like that???

Do you ever bring a guest to these thanksgiving dinners?? Do you have to state the disclaimer about your familty before arriving at the house?? My brother had to do this with his college friends and it was my Dad he was giving the disclaimer about. But Daddy wasn't that bad... my mom wouldn't let him.

Gosh, I miss my daddy.

vainandy said:

Actually, I think some of my family members don't even call and invite me over at holidays because they're afraid I might embarass them. Oh well....fuck 'em. I'm the Uncle Teddy in my family.

I thought this very thing when your earlier post.

InternationalLover82 said:

imago said:

Oh lawd, I remember this girl--we'll call her Terra.

Terra had slept with 3 of the men in her workcenter. That's all fine and dandy, other than the fact that she was married and her husband was away on a temperary tour of duty.

Anyways, he came back in early November, and being that we were all stationed in Germany and homesick, we did Thanksgiving dinner together as a gruop of displaced and semi-lonely holiday misfits.

Terra and her husband invites us all to dinner, and 2 of the people she invited had slept with her--unbeknownst to her husband of course.

Anyways, her hallway was very narrow, so her coat rack was up in the master bedroom behind the door if it was swung open. When we all entered the house and made our greetings, etc, both the two guys that were there knew exactly where to hang the coats and even pointed me in the direction of the masterbedroom with instructions "It's behind the door by the dresser."

Well, dinner was interresting.

Woww How did people know they slept together?

Because the guys knew where to hang their coats (which was an unusual spot) without having to be told when they had supposedly never been to the house before.

BlackAdder7 said:

I will miss Scndls' story about her aunt and the mac and cheese.

Did I miss something? Where is she? I thought she was the OP when I first read the title.

I am looking forward to reading her stories about the aunt (uncle's wife to be exact. ) and the mac and cheese updates.

My Uncle Teddy is dead. No one said shit to Uncle Teddy when he was cutting up. He would CUT you. Plus, he was absolutely beautiful. I mean from the time he was a baby to the day he died, people would stop in their tracks and look at him because he was that gorgeous

scriptgirl said:

My Uncle Teddy is dead. No one said shit to Uncle Teddy when he was cutting up. He would CUT you. Plus, he was absolutely beautiful. I mean from the time he was a baby to the day he died, people would stop in their tracks and look at him because he was that gorgeous

oh, so there would be plenty of shocked looks or snickering but no one dared said a word for fear he would start up on them... talking about a crooked wig, or someone being fat... etc.

and you know, when it is someone else on the hot seat, you are just so relieved it is not you, that your laughing is half out of the humor of the situation, and half nervousness that you will be next.

prodigalfan said:

scriptgirl said:

This Turkey Day was held at my Great Aunt Charlotte's house. She was seditty to the max. Anyway, she had the preacher over as well as everyone in the family to her big old house that she just had renovated.

[Edited 11/6/11 18:14pm]

I just had to laugh at that. Girl, you must be AA and have family from the south. The only other person I hear using that word to describe someone is my mother.

I love that word. We use to use that one non-stop in the early 80's. I need to bring it back and start using it with the other AA's who live over here across the pond !

Ottensen said:

prodigalfan said:

I just had to laugh at that. Girl, you must be AA and have family from the south. The only other person I hear using that word to describe someone is my mother.

I love that word. We use to use that one non-stop in the early 80's. I need to bring it back and start using it with the other AA's who live over here across the pond !

Talk about seditty! My daddy's motoher was downright hankty! Remember that one? Where my southern girls at?

I swear, my praternal granmother was a pistol, y'all. She was one of the "high yella" educated women of the South. She as sooooo proper and do. Sometimes it was downright funny. I remember a time when she was visiting us when we lived in New Jersey. Mom had invited some neighbors from down the street to have lunch with Grandma. I was in the kitchen listening to her talk and putting on aris, and my daddy came in the kitchen agitated. I said, "What's wrong, Dad?" He said, "Lawdamery, Mama in there being all hankty and shit!" Po thang. He was so embarrassed.

scriptgirl said:

My Uncle Teddy is dead. No one said shit to Uncle Teddy when he was cutting up. He would CUT you. Plus, he was absolutely beautiful. I mean from the time he was a baby to the day he died, people would stop in their tracks and look at him because he was that gorgeous

Uncle Teddy sounds unforgettable any pics of him?

Lol, none that I can post!