blackbob said:

johnart said:

I think blackbob's girlfriend is my favorite almost-orger.

...i think part of me wishes she would read my posts.....

I think ur right. Seems like u let off a bit of steam about her ways on here.

Of course we only see one side but from what we get to see here U seem like a nice guy. I hope someday u stand your ground face to face on some of these issues instead of just posting where she's not seeing them.

Y'know why I would never check Sweetie's phone? Because he has a Crackberry. Damned if I can figure one of those things out.

He prolly won't be able to figure out my new iPhone, either.

Genesia said:

Y'know why I would never check Sweetie's phone? Because he has a Crackberry. Damned if I can figure one of those things out.

He prolly won't be able to figure out my new iPhone, either.

MacDaddy said:

Genesia said:

Y'know why I would never check Sweetie's phone? Because he has a Crackberry. Damned if I can figure one of those things out.

He prolly won't be able to figure out my new iPhone, either.

What can I say? We're old and stupid.

Genesia said:

MacDaddy said:

What can I say? We're old and stupid.

aww you're not stupid.

johnart said:

Genesia said:

What can I say? We're old and stupid.

aww you're not stupid.

Genesia said:

johnart said:

aww you're not stupid.

It's probably a lack of trust but to avoid that just simply lock your phone.

johnart said:

blackbob said:

...i think part of me wishes she would read my posts.....

I think ur right. Seems like u let off a bit of steam about her ways on here.

Of course we only see one side but from what we get to see here U seem like a nice guy. I hope someday u stand your ground face to face on some of these issues instead of just posting where she's not seeing them.

thanks..i know you only hear one side of things but i am a fairly laid back guy...i guess if i didnt have feelings for her then i wouldnt get soo upset about it..i just come on hear and let off steam from the frustration i feel as you said john...i dont want to have to start all over again...did it once and it was hard going.....i told her a few days ago that things had to change and she couldnt expect me to put up with her mood swings and paranoia forever because i will lose patience eventually...sorry for being a moaner on here but i guess it does help me by getting it off my chest somewhere and i have been on this website now for over ten years so this is my cyberspace home and you all are my cyberspace squatters... ....thanks for listening..

Whatever. It's doomed.

There's another aspect of this subject that hasn't been mentioned, the confidentiality of the person sending the texts or leaving the voicemails. If for example I want to tell my brother something private about me and I tell him in a text or vmail, it's meant for him alone - not for his wife or girlfriend. Two relatives should be able to exchange information confidentially without spouses or significant others knowing about it, that's why I hate when couples read each other's texts and email without letting everyone know they are doing it.

JustErin said:

Whatever. It's doomed.

your probably right justerin....but at least i gave it every chance if it does have to end.....

On one hand its an invasion of privacy especially when you've been adamant that you don't want your partner checking your phone. On the other hand, if you've got nothing to hide then it shouldn't be a big deal.

blackbob said:

JustErin said:

Whatever. It's doomed.

your probably right justerin....but at least i gave it every chance if it does have to end.....

You don't have to keep duplicating that last chance a million times. Just sayin.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

blackbob said:

your probably right justerin....but at least i gave it every chance if it does have to end.....

You don't have to keep duplicating that last chance a million times. Just sayin.

its hard to walk away when young kids are involved supa.....i know..i am probably a mug but its heartbreaking not seeing your kid...but i will once all hope is gone...thanks for your advice mate..

Blackbob, i hope whatever your decision(s), you (and all) will be ok. life's major shifts can be challenging, however we have to stay positive as we move forward.

blackbob said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

You don't have to keep duplicating that last chance a million times. Just sayin.

its hard to walk away when young kids are involved supa.....i know..i am probably a mug but its heartbreaking not seeing your kid...but i will once all hope is gone...thanks for your advice mate..

I noticed you didn't respond to me before, but what do you mean "not seeeing your kid"? why wouldn't you see your kid anymore? I would say that from the looks of it, your wife would have to be the one to go without. Or are you just saying now, that because it hurts YOU so bad to split up, you want to hang on to "hope"? How about do what's best for your child? Think about how bad it hurts the child to have its parents argueing all the time, having to grow up in all that bullshit and tension.

Meh. I got bupkus (nothin') for this one.

Here's a hug and try to keep your chin up.

Tremolina said:

blackbob said:

its hard to walk away when young kids are involved supa.....i know..i am probably a mug but its heartbreaking not seeing your kid...but i will once all hope is gone...thanks for your advice mate..

I noticed you didn't respond to me before, but what do you mean "not seeeing your kid"? why wouldn't you see your kid anymore? I would say that from the looks of it, your wife would have to be the one to go without. Or are you just saying now, that because it hurts YOU so bad to split up, you want to hang on to "hope"? How about do what's best for your child? Think about how bad it hurts the child to have its parents argueing all the time, having to grow up in all that bullshit and tension.

hi tremolina...sorry i didnt respond to your previous reply...i read all the comments and i took on board what you said....i am just going by my experience of my previous break up...my ex still stops me from seeing my son every so often and its now been over six years since we split up..its not as bad as it was but she still uses my son against me...i cant be sure that wouldnt happen again if this relationship has to end...we dont really fight very much...certainly not in front of my 3 year old..so i dont think it has affected her that much....i know people say kids can sense when something isnt right but i have tried to keep it civil and i am not one for big arguments..thanks for taking the time to reply ...

Hey bob, sorry if I'm coming across a little insensitive. I really don't want to do that, because I sense you are battling with this (it's like your fifth thread or so about problems with your current wife)

I understand what you are trying to say with being afraid you will not see your kid anymore. But fear is not what you should be listening to in this kind of situation. Love is. Love for yourself and your child, but also your wife. I am not saying: leave her now! But do what's best for the three of you. Sometimes that means letting go.

Do you remember having any MAIN regrets about the WAY you seperated from your 1st wife? What did you learn from it? Is your current wife just like your ex? Don't you think also, you would have a better chance of seeing your kids if the relationships with their respective mothers is good? And that when the break-up is handled with care and sufficient speed (not letting it sicken everything) that you will not hate eachother for years like you and your ex?

Parting advice: grow some balls. Your happiness matters. Pussy ain't that important. And your kids growing up seeing you happy and positive will make far more difference than years of memories relating to how much their parents hated each other.