I haven't seen any new threads posted lately, and it seems like I'm the only one online right now! I guess everyone has better things to do with their Saturdays. And it is evening over here, so I guess most people are out with their social lives...

Oh well, I'll just sit here and wait for someone else to post something interesting and fun that I can comment on. Can't think of anything myself at the moment. Drowning... boredom... sorrows... in alcohol...

Hey, minneapolisgenius, how's it hanging? What are your plans for tomorrow? Hope you're feeling okay. I know, I'll cheer you up by inventing a new profile for you.


minneapolisgenius's profile
Send minneapolisgenius an orgNote! (if you really feel that you need to contact an hermaphrodite lizard)
Adding minneapolisgenius to your orgBuddy list wouldn't be wise
Joined: Jan 23 1803
Posts: 14,982 (List mistakes by minneapolisgenius)
Location: Funkytown, Amytiville
E-mail: fivenipplesandableachaddi...xxporn.com
Fan level: This Is A Prince site?
Favorite albums: Whitney Houston - 'My career went where?'
Favorite songs: 'All Things Bright And Beautiful', the Luxembourg national anthem, the music in my head
Favorite (other)
artists: Englebert Humperdink

_____
[This message was edited Sat Feb 15 14:36:56 PST 2003 by Haystack]

haystack

i don't have a life either, mplsgenius...don't worry...

Hey! I'm not a hermaphrodite!

Hey Handclaps. I'm in a silly mood, so I'm gonna do your profile, too. Hope you don't mind.

Send Handclapsfingasnapz an orgNote! (Cos she's desperate for friends)
Add Handclapsfingasnapz to your orgBuddy list if you're as desperate as she is
Joined: Writing is difficult for her.
Posts: 21,721 (List embarrassing moments by Handclapsfingasnapz)

don't pork it. it'll fight.

nevermind the jan. 5th join-date, i've been here on the .org since the twelfth of never. i'm a bit of a rancid smelling fart 'round here, i guess...*lol* on the old .org i wuz ConstantlyDrunk, then i became EvenWorse, and before the .org switched over i wuz UnderAnaesthetic. then again, u probably don't know jack-shit about Dawson's Creek, whereas I do!...*lol*

representin despicable acts of witchcraft, The MidwestFroggySquashers™, the Silly Squad, the NBC, the Sexy Doorstep/Dirty Hands Defender Corpse, and the world of Britney geex 2 the fullest. still the undisputed Queen Of The Is-That-The-Time™ Threadz, and i specialize in findin digitally enhanced/old-skool pix of MJ (tee hee)...i put "enthusiast" as my fan level cuz they didn't have a "Luurve N-Sync more than Prince" level.

CAUTION: profile pic may be disturbing without notice, dahlings.
DOUBLE CAUTION: don't ask me where i get my pix from, cuz i steal them from Prince himself, who's tied to my bed right now, which is why there hasn't been any NPGMC 2003 so far!! *rofl*
Name: Doris Day (honestly)
Location: Confusing Junction, Somewhere I don't recognise, U.S. of A
E-mail: gorgeouscreaturewithafeti...s@home.com
Homepage: http://www.Haystackmustdie.com
Gender: Both
Fan level: Oh, you wouldn't believe!
Hobbies: readin/colouring in comix (i'm the sista who does the meditating on newpowerclique.com), watchin re-runs of Dynasty till my eyes hurt, listenin 2 my own coughs, makin folks crack their head against the wall by beating them up, layin the local Avon salesperson. And any psycho-fams who need layin, torturin my slaves with Backstreet Boys albums all day long, and listenin 2 the "Whitney" album on a near non-stop basis... and when i'm not doin any of that, i sit on the .org and watch the purple penises go by.
AOL IM ID: Forever In My Life (click name to send message) (click here to add buddy)
ICQ Number: 1-900-wholeupperarminyoass
MSN Messenger: The Minni-Iowan™
Yahoo! Messenger ID: kgeeksquad80
Age: 94
Birthday: Nowonder 7th, '60
Favorite albums: my territory is the stuff Mozart did between '78 and '88. anything '89 and beyond, i tread lightly on meringues, generally.
Favorite songs: u wanna see ALL my fave songs?? Well, there's two - 'Tragedy' by the BeeGees and any songs by Billy Ray Cyrus
Favorite (other)
artists: sounds from the 4 m's (motown, memphis, minneapolis and My own snoring - which I record and mix into funky club sounds)...also: blondie, the ramones, sex pistols, cameo, Big cocks, the gap band, teena marie, frank zappa, stephanie mills, kraftwerk, Kriss Kross and any old-skool punk, funk, r & b, and new wave...i'm mainly into breaking into my old-skool and stealing chalk, so if u mention any new-skool stuff i'ma be like, "Fuck Off!"

how can i be 94 and be born in 1960?

Haystack said:

have u been peekin in through my bedroom window?

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

It's all part of your witchcraft...

ooohhh, Engelbert Humperdink...

Haystack said:

Haystack, you've gotta make this into a separate thread.

Good gag!

2the9s said:

May this thread be it - led by minneapolisgenius. Could somebody abuse my profile, please? And I'll abuse theirs.


Profile Abuse - stop it now by giving all your money to Haystack.

Haystack said:

damn straight!!! now if you'll excuse me i gotta go feed prince. he's been cryin 4 a good half an hour about how hungry he is...

Haystack's Profile:


HE CAN'T RESIST THE HANDS

That is me on the left -- the robot girl.

Name: Puddin' T'aint

E-mail: needleinahaystack@aol.com

Gender:

Fan level: Giggling School Girl

Hobbies: Misquoting people, having them hunt me down, and getting my ass kicked.

Age: Like a fine ripple

Birthday: February 14th (That's right, I was born yesterday)

Favorite albums: Barry Manilow, Ann Murry, NewPowerSoul

Favorite (other) None, I am shallow and uninteresting. Wow, I can't believe I just typed that. I hope nobody else sees this.

Okay, not as funny as your real one!

But I gotta be going.

here ya go, haystack...freshly abused 4 your pleasure:

Send Haystack an orgNote! (or at least send an orgnote for the starving children in Lower Slobovia)
Add Haystack to your orgBuddy list (if u must...)
Joined: at the leg
Posts: three-fitty (List posts by Haystack)

THE LLAMAS RESIST HIM
Name: Brian "More Deviation" Jones
E-mail: (Not disclosed, at Interpol's request)
Gender: bent
Fan level: Nosebleed
Hobbies: huh?
Age: Halfway through my 88th soul now, so that makes me...
Birthday: 28th January
Favorite albums: My photo album of my trip to Chakaland, Paris, Rainbow Chittlin, The Mold Experience, Parancid
Favorite songs: Prince - Sensual Neverafter, Next 2 Last December, Days Of Wild (Discovery Channel remix). Buffy Sainte-Marie - Bon Soir. Erasure - Made a Boo-Boo
Favorite (other)
artists: Graffiti, performance, so-called, bad, has-been

2the9s's profile
Send 2the9s an orgNote! (as punching him in the face isn't an option)
Add 2the9s to your 'people-who-remind-you-of-sardines' list
Joined: Hundreds of singles clubs but never found the right person who would appreciate my disturbing fetish for old-men's dentures.
Roasts: Lamb and Chicken (List roasts by 2the9s)
E-mail: openheartsurgerysaboteur@...nstein.com
Gender: Perverse hybrid of man, woman and bicycle wheel
Fan level: Prince is okay, but I don't like songs where he shouts 'Awoa!' for no reason.
Hobbies: I understand that my hobbies are too sad, so I haven't posted any on my profile - almost inviting somebody to make fun of them. Therefore, I love trainspotting with a passion. I love to count the number of blades of grass whenever I'm in a field. And I love to eat other people's earwax.

Handclapsfingasnapz said:

I thank you! :

Abuse me please Haystack...

Okay, Therapy

Name: Eau de Cologne
Location: Y.U.K
E-mail: channeltunnellfanny@horny.co.uk
Gender: Squid
Fan level: Couldn't give a toss about Prince
Hobbies: Things on my 'to do' list. Learn to do drugs properly, trump more often, did you re-do?. Form a bandy-legged old-age-pensioner rock group, go back to taking the piss out of people who do Ty-Phoo. Learn Yogi Bear. Ride my pogo-stick more. Join a travelling needlework group. Go to the theatre and ruin music/plays etc for everybody else. Grow my own vegetables in my genital region - I haven't washed down there for a few months now and am currently growing some beetroot. Collages made from dead skin from the soles of my feet, poetry abuse.
Yahoo! Messenger ID: suecoletteforthousandsofeuros
Age: 4
Birthday: We March
Favorite albums: Nana Mouskouri - The Hits*The Osmonds - anything **EastEnders - The Audio CD
Favorite songs: Anything by James Last
Favorite (other)
artists: Also love Kenny G, Stevie Austin - a man barely alive, we can re-build him..., Hartley's Jam...The Old Bull and Bush, Rainbow with Zippy and George, J20, Grant, Phil and Peggy Mitchell, Terence Trent Derby (my money's on the horse), The Beetles in my kitchen, Lemongrass, Johnny Mathis, George Hamilton III, Unknown Person, Jazz - the new fragrance from Therapy pour l'homme, Old Heavies, Paul Wellington boot, Queen Elizabeth II, Berk.

Name: Haystack
E-mail: (Not disclosed, but click here to view my entire Prince collection!)
Sex : Always with the Scandalous Suite playing softly in the background.
Fan level: Hopelessly fixated
Hobbies: Designing Prince cover art, making hand painted Symbol ceramics, watching bootleg videos of Prince in concert, flying round the world to see every show, buying towels Prince used on Ebay, and knit.
Age: 33
Birthday: June 7 (Had it changed.)
Favorite albums: I love them all to death.
Favorite (other)
artists:Anyone who ever recorded at Paisley Park, covered Prince, influenced him, was influenced by him, gave him props or just mentionned him in passing..
[This message was edited Sat Feb 15 16:22:46 PST 2003 by Aerogram]

Aerogram said:

Dad, please. I told you to stop posting here.

Aerogram's profile
Send Aerogram a balloon full of tiny spiders intent on biting his genitals (a short, private part, apparently!)
Add Aerogram to your shopping list
Joined: the boyscouts for reasons unmentioned
FencePosts: surrounding his garden, (Listless Aerogram)
I am Adora, He-Man's twin sister... She-Ra to his buddies.
E-mail: isellmychesthairtothirdwo...@night.com
Blender: of various styles; funk, rock, square-dancing, you name it!
Spirit level: Not quite horizontal, raise it your end.
Hobbies: Left blank just so that Haystack can use his imagination. Here goes; pulling the legs off elephants, counting the spots on ladybirds whilst boiling them, naming all my household furniture (Marvin the couch, Frank the bookcase, Maria the television) and ignoring the old, metal kettle, when it whistles.

Name: Me and Mrs Jones
E-mail: (Not disclosed, but click here to cum on my face!)
Gender: Queen
Fan level: About a foot and a half from the ceiling.
Hobbies: Strapping young children on the rails of Rollercoasters and Theme parks. Then running away. Frighteningly frequent use of the my a-hole. The most boring sex that I can possibly muster. And collecting gerbil bollocks to make secret delicassies at dinner parties.
Age: Codger.
Birthday: 28th January
Favorite albums: My photo album of my trip to the Queens lav, London, Beating Children, The Sex Experience, Mincing at the Parade
Favorite (other)
things: The A Team, Dukes of Hazard, Jimmy Saville does XXX.

Therapy said:

When I first read this, I cried with horror as I realised just what a monster I was. But then, I suppose that the truth hurts...

Oh boy, was I pissed (drunk) last night. Still, it appears that I manage to create my most creative posts whilst drunk.

Ain't life strange?

Cloudbusters' profile

Send Cloudbuster an orgasm (a short, breathtaking climax)
Add Cloudbuster to your must-kill list
ReJoiced: Apr 25 2002 and not one time since.
Number of spots on face: 1,724 (List pimples by Cloudbuster)

One day planet Earth will all be Kate Bush's!
Name: Dr. Miriam Stoppard
Location: F.U.C.K.
E-mail: cloudbustersucksgorillase...tories.com
Deodorant used: Not sure
Clothes level: Casual
Hobbies: Music boxes, weeding, wanking, peeping on old ladies getting undressed, odd-sock spotting in laundrettes.
Birthday: cake is nice
Favorite albums: A tribute to Kate Bush - The Jacksons, Sign Your Name Across My Spleen - Terence and Phillip, Humpty Dumpty Sat On The Wall - Michael Jackson, Revolver - To kill those evil women who taunt me. They deserve to die!!!, Kid myself that I've got a great taste in music - Mustbesomethingwronginthehead, Rusks - Baby Fleetwood Mac, How deep is your bruv? - Bee Gees, Glow - The Boy David , A Rush Of Blood To The Head, when I hear Jane McDonald, Pasteurogenic - Bjork Gold-Top. I,I,I, - Gareth Gates, Last Night Was A - Blur , What's Going On? - Were my thoughts, last night.
Favorite songs: Way too many, but 'Shaddap Your Face' by Joe Dolce comes close.
Favorite (other)
artists: George Bush, Jesse Jackson, Pee Pee, Led Weight, Simon & My Uncle, I hate anyone who's Gay, The Roses Chocolates, Becks, Severn Trent D'Arby, Tori Spelling, Port, Boy George, WonderBra, Pink Champagne, Coldfish, Stevie Nicks her legs whilst shaving, Ed Harris,

I like your sig Haystack!

Lleena said:

Thank you. It's something that we all do - worry about how we're viewed by other people. Ultimately, however, it wastes large portions of your day if you worry about other people's views too much. Far better to get on with being yourself and enjoying the company of those who appreciate you for what you are. If you have a good attitude in life, then others will see it and forgive you any minor mistakes. But sometimes, we judge ourselves way too harshly and become convinced that others are seeing us in the same way that we are and that is very rarely the case.

Just my way of looking at things.

It's good to read that in your sig. I need to remind myself of that often. And seeing as I stalk you, I'll manage that

Thanx for sharing that last night Haystack