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Thread started 09/21/11 9:33pm

kimrachell

Friendships, Isolation, & Internet...

so my question(s) to you is: do you have a lot of in-person friends? i mean, real, true, close friendships? or do you find that you are a person that spends much of their time online with the internet. do you feel isolated by not having real life friends? or is internet friends enough for you?

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Reply #1 posted 09/21/11 9:39pm

kimrachell

as for me, i don't have that many friends i see face to face. most all of my friends live far away from me, and we keep in contact via facebook, or video chat. i find myself wanting or needing to have at least one or two people that i can meet with in person for lunch, to talk, or have some things in common. so i'm going to find ways to seek some new friendships. because as much as i love my internet friendships, it's just not enough. smile

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Reply #2 posted 09/21/11 10:04pm

kewlschool

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Thank goodness for internet porn. pray

99.9% of everything I say is strictly for my own entertainment
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Reply #3 posted 09/21/11 10:04pm

kimrachell

kewlschool said:

Thank goodness for internet porn. pray

lol of course! lol

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Reply #4 posted 09/21/11 10:09pm

ZombieKitten

While my kids were babies and toddlers and preschoolers I turned to the Internet for stimulating discussion on things OTHER than the joys rolleyes of motherhood.

I don't really seek out people's company so much but that doesnt mean I don't love it. Social interaction always elevates my mood and I feed off the energy, but I need LOTS of downtime. I'm probably happiest in my own company to be honest. I also love snuggling though :phonecall:

Between work and family and clients and people in shops and he Internet I got enough I reckon. I have my internet besties who have spilled into my real life too mushy
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Reply #5 posted 09/21/11 10:21pm

RenHoek

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No... I've been burned by "best friends" SO many times... burned hard, so I find it difficult to make new really close relationships.

considering that much of my blood-family loathes me as well there's not a whole lot of that love going around either... confused

sure, this all makes me sound like an ass but whatever... life is too short.

The majority of my friends that I do have live in Germany and we try to stay in touch, here in Cali I can count the number of valued friends on one hand... neutral

Just another reason to love the org and it's orgers that much more... hug

A working class Hero is something to be ~ Lennon
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Reply #6 posted 09/21/11 10:26pm

paintedlady

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I keep very few close friends... I make friends easily where ever I go, but those people usually have busy lives and I don't get much time to hang out and socialize like I did when I was younger.

I am usually with my kids and the things I do center around that. I speak to a couple of people online now and then and I know people in real time that know nothing of the org. The only people I really open up to online are on the org.

There is no other website I visit on a regular like the org.... except FB, and on FB those people are family and real time friends I catch up with. Its easy to re-connect and have a fast lunch or just message them online to catch up on their lives. I have only really been to a few parties since most live down south though and I only get to see them seldomly if they travel back up north to visit family.

So I am pretty isolated, but I like that. I push people away since I do have a few aquaintences that need attention, and since I can do hair I get lots of "friends" wanting hook-ups. shake

Me spending my day doing some bitches head in my kitchen is NOT my idea of fun. Bitch... go to a salon. talk to the hand I'm hitting the beach, the garden or cleaning my house in my free time. Deuces.

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Reply #7 posted 09/21/11 10:27pm

kewlschool

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The only internet friends I have that are just internet are here on the ORG. Although, I would not be opposed to meeting up with some folks. The hotter the better batting eyes (I'm sorry that sounded shallow). What I meant is that your soul must be beautifully wrapped in a hot body. smile

sp!


[Edited 9/22/11 0:14am]

99.9% of everything I say is strictly for my own entertainment
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Reply #8 posted 09/21/11 10:41pm

paintedlady

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kewlschool said:

The only internet friends I have that are just internet are here on the ORG. Although, I would not be opposed to meeting up with some folks. The hotter the better batting eyes (I'm sorry that sounded shallow). What I meant is that your soul most beautifully wrapped in a hot body. smile

There really are great people here...

I have to be careful though... more of my real time friends and family ask me... "what's the org.?" shake

"I saw you post something on FB"... NOOOOOO!!

You learn much about the human condition and about yourself in the org.

funny thing, to meet people in real time is never a priority... I sorta like the mystery of not knowing the faces... but the spirits of people.

Knowing the personalities first then their faces is so much nicer. It makes you appreciate the whole of a person more.

[Edited 9/21/11 22:42pm]

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Reply #9 posted 09/21/11 10:42pm

insomnia

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I spend a ton of time on the road, and all of the travel means I don't get to see my friends or family nearly as often as I would like. In addition, all of my besties are scattered across the country/world...so the internet is a good tool to keep in touch until I see them next. smile

Everything old is new again...
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Reply #10 posted 09/21/11 10:48pm

kewlschool

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paintedlady said:

kewlschool said:

The only internet friends I have that are just internet are here on the ORG. Although, I would not be opposed to meeting up with some folks. The hotter the better batting eyes (I'm sorry that sounded shallow). What I meant is that your soul most beautifully wrapped in a hot body. smile

There really are great people here...

I have to be careful though... more of my real time friends and family ask me... "what's the org.?" shake

"I saw you post something on FB"... NOOOOOO!!

You learn much about the human condition and about yourself in the org.

funny thing, to meet people in real time is never a priority... I sorta like the mystery of not knowing the faces... but the spirits of people.

Knowing the personalities first then their faces is so much nicer. It makes you appreciate the whole of a person more.

[Edited 9/21/11 22:42pm]

thumbs up!

99.9% of everything I say is strictly for my own entertainment
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Reply #11 posted 09/21/11 11:23pm

noimageatall

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paintedlady said:

kewlschool said:

The only internet friends I have that are just internet are here on the ORG. Although, I would not be opposed to meeting up with some folks. The hotter the better batting eyes (I'm sorry that sounded shallow). What I meant is that your soul most beautifully wrapped in a hot body. smile

There really are great people here...

I have to be careful though... more of my real time friends and family ask me... "what's the org.?" shake

"I saw you post something on FB"... NOOOOOO!!

You learn much about the human condition and about yourself in the org.

funny thing, to meet people in real time is never a priority... I sorta like the mystery of not knowing the faces... but the spirits of people.

Knowing the personalities first then their faces is so much nicer. It makes you appreciate the whole of a person more.

[Edited 9/21/11 22:42pm]

nod hug

"Let love be your perfect weapon..." ~~Andy Biersack
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Reply #12 posted 09/22/11 6:55am

PurpleJedi

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paintedlady said:

I am usually with my kids and the things I do center around that. I speak to a couple of people online now and then and I know people in real time that know nothing of the org. The only people I really open up to online are on the org.

There is no other website I visit on a regular like the org.... except FB, and on FB those people are family and real time friends I catch up with. Its easy to re-connect and have a fast lunch or just message them online to catch up on their lives.

yeahthat

I've never really had "ALOT" of friends. Just a handful. My wife was my one & only confidant. I didn't think I needed anyone else. Unhealthy I realize now.

When my personal life imploded, I got to discover who was truly a "friend", who was merely an "acquaintace" and who was an outright "foe".

It's amazing how you THINK that you know some people... disbelief

I never did Friendster, Myspace and even Facebook was a last-minute thing for me. The only online "social network" that I frequented was the Org.

Until I die, I will always be grateful for the many FRIENDS that I have made on the Org since I decided to ditch the shell.

grouphug

So for me right now, it's a fairly even mix of checking in on the Org (& even FB) to interact with "online friends", and going out with my RL friends.

By St. Boogar and all the saints at the backside door of Purgatory!
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Reply #13 posted 09/22/11 6:55am

SCNDLS

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I'm actually blessed with an awesome group of friendsIRL. My BFF and I have been friends since December '91 and he's my rock. If I had to get rid of a body in the middle of the night, he's who I'd call and he'd ask: "Do you have a shovel or should I bring one?" mushy

I know people think women are generally catty and shit but most of my girlfriends have been down with me for 18 years or longer and knew me when. No drama, never any kind of serious argument or disagreement. We're all strong personalities and have no problem putting the shit out there and dealing with any issues openly.

I'm also really lucky that in the last 5 years I've added some more awesome ladies to the mix. One I actually met on the Org 4 years ago and she's my ace boom coon. Plus, I'm really social and go out a lot and I'm always pleased at the genuinely wonderful people I encounter regularly.

I'm only on the Org cuz I work at home and am constantly online. So I'm not necesarily trynna fill a void or meet people. Since I spend most days alone working the Org is pretty much my watercooler to shoot the shit and discuss current events and bullshit. If I worked in an office I'd rarely be here. cool

[Edited 9/22/11 7:52am]

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Reply #14 posted 09/22/11 7:05am

Ottensen

I have a pretty large social circle, but I can count the number of people I actually like to kick it with on 2 hands. My primary attention and devotion goes to my loved ones IRL- they really are part of the foundation of what makes my life rich and rewarding on a deeper level. However I do enjoy the internet and chilling out with people online though, because you run into so many interesting people from all parts of the globe, with cool interests. I almost look at internet friends as the friendly neighbor across the street that you trade a couple tomatoes and some backyard gossip with; my 3-D life is set aside for my real time friends to actually have dinner with, work on my spiritual growth with, dogsit for, sail with, make music with, etc.,

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Reply #15 posted 09/22/11 7:07am

Ottensen

paintedlady said:

kewlschool said:

The only internet friends I have that are just internet are here on the ORG. Although, I would not be opposed to meeting up with some folks. The hotter the better batting eyes (I'm sorry that sounded shallow). What I meant is that your soul most beautifully wrapped in a hot body. smile

There really are great people here...

I have to be careful though... more of my real time friends and family ask me... "what's the org.?" shake

"I saw you post something on FB"... NOOOOOO!!

You learn much about the human condition and about yourself in the org.

funny thing, to meet people in real time is never a priority... I sorta like the mystery of not knowing the faces... but the spirits of people.

Knowing the personalities first then their faces is so much nicer. It makes you appreciate the whole of a person more.

[Edited 9/21/11 22:42pm]

nod

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Reply #16 posted 09/22/11 7:12am

JuliePurplehea
d

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I have 4 solid IRL friendships; no matter what, they'll always be in my life. I have a lot of acquaintances, mostly from work. I know that I'll probably only see them on the internet once my journey at my job is done although I think I'll still meet up with some of them from time to time. I love my internet/org friends although I'm not as close to them as some of y'all are. And even though I love reading what's going on in their lives, it would not be enough for me. I need to get out and actually interact. I start to feel old and unmotivated if I don't.

I went out of town over the weekend. I was away from my computer for 3 days. I lived. shrug

[Edited 9/22/11 7:13am]

Shake it til ya make it dancing jig
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Reply #17 posted 09/22/11 7:25am

CarrieMpls

Ex-Moderator

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I used to have a very large group of friends I spent time with regularly. When we’d have holiday parties and gatherings there would be 40 or so of us and I would have considered us all practically family. Of course you’re closer with some than others but they were all my good friends.

These days I spend time regularly with only a handful of people. For me it’s partly just a symptom of time passing and folks growing up (moving away, having families) and also over the last year and a half focusing so much time and energy on one very important relationship. I’ve actually purposefully started to try to cultivate my friendships in real time again, particularly with girlfriends. I miss my girlfriends. I love my boyfriend and all my gays but I have been definitely missing female relationships in my life.

I do have several friendships that started online and mostly continue that way as we don’t live near each other. Those friendships are as important to me as any other, it just means we don’t spend as much time together.

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Reply #18 posted 09/22/11 8:27am

kimrachell

SCNDLS said:

I'm actually blessed with an awesome group of friendsIRL. My BFF and I have been friends since December '91 and he's my rock. If I had to get rid of a body in the middle of the night, he's who I'd call and he'd ask: "Do you have a shovel or should I bring one?" mushy

I know people think women are generally catty and shit but most of my girlfriends have been down with me for 18 years or longer and knew me when. No drama, never any kind of serious argument or disagreement. We're all strong personalities and have no problem putting the shit out there and dealing with any issues openly.

I'm also really lucky that in the last 5 years I've added some more awesome ladies to the mix. One I actually met on the Org 4 years ago and she's my ace boom coon. Plus, I'm really social and go out a lot and I'm always pleased at the genuinely wonderful people I encounter regularly.

I'm only on the Org cuz I work at home and am constantly online. So I'm not necesarily trynna fill a void or meet people. Since I spend most days alone working the Org is pretty much my watercooler to shoot the shit and discuss current events and bullshit. If I worked in an office I'd rarely be here. cool

[Edited 9/22/11 7:52am]

biggrin i think it's wonderful that you have such a happy and full life. rose hug

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Reply #19 posted 09/22/11 8:33am

kimrachell

RenHoek said:

No... I've been burned by "best friends" SO many times... burned hard, so I find it difficult to make new really close relationships.

considering that much of my blood-family loathes me as well there's not a whole lot of that love going around either... confused

sure, this all makes me sound like an ass but whatever... life is too short.

The majority of my friends that I do have live in Germany and we try to stay in touch, here in Cali I can count the number of valued friends on one hand... neutral

Just another reason to love the org and it's orgers that much more... hug

i can relate to the family part, i am not popular in my family at all! in-fact i never see anyone in my family except my parents once a year. most of my family just doesn't care about me, or want to see me. it deeply hurts me, because i am the kind of person that loves to be with family. i guess i will never understand it? i've tried so many times to bring everyone together, and it just doesn't work. so i am much closer to my husband's family, just wish they all didn't live so far away in brazil!

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Reply #20 posted 09/22/11 9:05am

SCNDLS

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kimrachell said:

SCNDLS said:

I'm actually blessed with an awesome group of friendsIRL. My BFF and I have been friends since December '91 and he's my rock. If I had to get rid of a body in the middle of the night, he's who I'd call and he'd ask: "Do you have a shovel or should I bring one?" mushy

I know people think women are generally catty and shit but most of my girlfriends have been down with me for 18 years or longer and knew me when. No drama, never any kind of serious argument or disagreement. We're all strong personalities and have no problem putting the shit out there and dealing with any issues openly.

I'm also really lucky that in the last 5 years I've added some more awesome ladies to the mix. One I actually met on the Org 4 years ago and she's my ace boom coon. Plus, I'm really social and go out a lot and I'm always pleased at the genuinely wonderful people I encounter regularly.

I'm only on the Org cuz I work at home and am constantly online. So I'm not necesarily trynna fill a void or meet people. Since I spend most days alone working the Org is pretty much my watercooler to shoot the shit and discuss current events and bullshit. If I worked in an office I'd rarely be here. cool

[Edited 9/22/11 7:52am]

biggrin i think it's wonderful that you have such a happy and full life. rose hug

hug I've been blessed immesurably since I left home at 18 and didn't look back. I'm not close to my family either but God has always put the best people in my life so I never felt alone. I have so many surrogate mothers it's ridiculous. This one lady I worked with when I was in collage totally adopted me. And her daughters introduce me as their sister. Even now people who know her ask me, "How's your mom doing?" when they see me.

lol

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Reply #21 posted 09/22/11 9:26am

LionsAndTigers

I don't have many close friends in real life. I've always had bad experiences with people which makes me not trusting and makes me keep myself closed off a lot of the time. Of course, I do like having social interaction, but I'm fine being alone a lot of the time. I don't spend a lot of time online nowadays, so I've pretty much lost contact with the majority of friends I've made online. I'm fine with just having a few people that I'm close to in my life. shrug

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Reply #22 posted 09/22/11 10:06am

PunkMistress

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I like isolation.

I love the Internet because it's so undemanding as far as relationship maintenance. Real time stuff like phone conversations are so stressful. lol

It's what you make it.
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Reply #23 posted 09/22/11 1:03pm

XxAxX

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kimrachell said:

so my question(s) to you is: do you have a lot of in-person friends? i mean, real, true, close friendships? or do you find that you are a person that spends much of their time online with the internet. do you feel isolated by not having real life friends? or is internet friends enough for you?

i do have real people friends and extended family members. we use the internet to stay in touch, as well as face to face.

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Reply #24 posted 09/22/11 1:08pm

HamsterHuey

ZombieKitten said:

I also love snuggling though call

[img:$uid]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v652/hhja/zombeekitten.jpg[/img:$uid]

>>
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Reply #25 posted 09/22/11 1:16pm

HamsterHuey

To me, Org was a home away from home when I was going through some personal stuff and it helped relieve tension for me by diverting banter and sharing music.

Some internet contacts spilled over to real life in ways I could never imagine. But yes, I do have some amazing friends; a small circle of dear, close friends and a larger circle of great buds I get to hang with too, but to a lesser extent.

These days Facebook and to some extent other forums like this one are just a way to kill time while I am rummaging around on the internet (music, mostly). And as Erin said; it's an easy way to keep in contact with friends, in my case often on the other side of the world.

My Org connections do take care of the fact that whenever I am online, some other Orger is too; Nick in Asia, Charlotte in Oz, Kevin in the US and Petra in EU, there's always someone to banter with.

>>
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Reply #26 posted 09/22/11 2:34pm

ZombieKitten

HamsterHuey said:

To me, Org was a home away from home when I was going through some personal stuff and it helped relieve tension for me by diverting banter and sharing music.

Some internet contacts spilled over to real life in ways I could never imagine. But yes, I do have some amazing friends; a small circle of dear, close friends and a larger circle of great buds I get to hang with too, but to a lesser extent.

These days Facebook and to some extent other forums like this one are just a way to kill time while I am rummaging around on the internet (music, mostly). And as Erin said; it's an easy way to keep in contact with friends, in my case often on the other side of the world.

My Org connections do take care of the fact that whenever I am online, some other Orger is too; Nick in Asia, Charlotte in Oz, Kevin in the US and Petra in EU, there's always someone to banter with.


kiss2
We got all the timezones covered baby cool
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Reply #27 posted 09/22/11 2:45pm

NDRU

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I have real friends, too, but the interaction is different here. I take part in large convos with dozens of people, where IRL I might be shut out of a large group because I am not aggressive.

And of course the web is amazing because I can truly be friends with someone across the world and feel connected.

But I don't really care to talk to my everyday friends online though, there is no point when I can just see them in person.

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Reply #28 posted 09/22/11 3:42pm

davetherave676
7

All my friends r women...........Eye have 1 male friend eye c once in a blue moon....Eye have chosen 2 isolate myself its a life choice and eye love it!!!!Eye have prince penfriends since the days of Controversy mag and friends on the org.............There r many negative forces on the org but when that orgnote flashes and its some1 who is on the same page as dave life is good contrary 2 what some orgers may think Davetherave has many friends on the org...........falloff ..........No realy eye do so there:nana:

Dave Is Nuttier Than A Can Of Planters Peanuts...(Ottensen)
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Reply #29 posted 09/22/11 4:09pm

ZombieKitten

NDRU said:

And of course the web is amazing because I can truly be friends with someone across the world and feel connected.

yes, and I'm happy when those BFFs spill over into real life kiss2

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