Someone was trying to hint tonight that I should go out with them and kept asking me if they're nice, I called them out for it. He seems to have so much in common with other trainwrecks I've dated though he is VERY good looking he's a pathological liar, he's harassed past girlfriends badly though I'm not supposed to know this, he likes MJ casually and claims he knows someone that knows Jermaine, and comes off as nice and calm in person from afar though I can see through it. He's a family friend I met years ago and I thought he was cute but he was taken then, but now he's claiming he's still seeing someone though saying I should date someone like him. I brushed him off but I think I was being a bit rude although I told him I'm an ass online sometimes and it's part of my humor (thanks org!) and said a few times I'm not looking right now, I'm fine where I am though later he would say I need a bf.....so what if I'm 28 and not seeing someone? I'm hearing more and more that I need someone, why the hell is everyone so worried I Don't have someone when I'm fine with being single, doing nice things for myself at last, and struggling daily with a mental health condition that's been acting up again the past few days? The last thing I need is more mental stress, and I ended up having an episode all weekend that's only now going down. Of course it's nice to have company,but my trust has been broken really badly and I've been hurt too many times when getting attached to someone ese, and I'm not one of those girls who feels about herself for not having a guy, instead I'm busy plotting who to punch in the face next if they EVER confront me in real time Just glad my immediate family doesn't say stupid things like that, though some of my relatives, the ones I purposely ignore say shit time to time

I got out of a bad one earlier this year and decided to just not see anyone for a long time till I sort myself out. I don't believe boyfriends cure depression, I'm not dense

[Edited 9/5/11 23:56pm]

what is this...

ummm

looking for cock?

boyfriends are a pain!

alphastreet said:

Someone was trying to hint tonight that I should go out with them and kept asking me if they're nice, I called them out for it. He seems to have so much in common with other trainwrecks I've dated though he is VERY good looking he's a pathological liar, he's harassed past girlfriends badly though I'm not supposed to know this, he likes MJ casually and claims he knows someone that knows Jermaine, and comes off as nice and calm in person from afar though I can see through it. He's a family friend I met years ago and I thought he was cute but he was taken then, but now he's claiming he's still seeing someone though saying I should date someone like him. I brushed him off but I think I was being a bit rude although I told him I'm an ass online sometimes and it's part of my humor (thanks org!) and said a few times I'm not looking right now, I'm fine where I am though later he would say I need a bf.....so what if I'm 28 and not seeing someone? I'm hearing more and more that I need someone, why the hell is everyone so worried I Don't have someone when I'm fine with being single, doing nice things for myself at last, and struggling daily with a mental health condition that's been acting up again the past few days? The last thing I need is more mental stress, and I ended up having an episode all weekend that's only now going down. Of course it's nice to have company,but my trust has been broken really badly and I've been hurt too many times when getting attached to someone ese, and I'm not one of those girls who feels about herself for not having a guy, instead I'm busy plotting who to punch in the face next if they EVER confront me in real time Just glad my immediate family doesn't say stupid things like that, though some of my relatives, the ones I purposely ignore say shit time to time

I got out of a bad one earlier this year and decided to just not see anyone for a long time till I sort myself out. I don't believe boyfriends cure depression, I'm not dense

[Edited 9/5/11 23:56pm]

Run fast and far away from that guy.

No worries, life as a single is way less stress and oftentimes way more fun than being in a relationship. Don't let anybody else tell you that you should meet a societal standard because they think that's better for you. It's you who lives your life and sets the standard for your own life.

I agree. Boyfriends can cause a depression, however rarely cure one.

Sounds to me you are taking care of yourself, choosing a path that is good for your own (mental) health. Then everything will be okay in the end. F** the rest.

i used to b like that..... and its a nightmare because u just end up getting hurt!!!

now i'm older n wiser i know what to look 4 and if i meet someone even a lill bit like my X - i RUN!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah I already knew I didn't want to get involved at all with him, but lately I'm tired of people staying stuff to me, as if something is wrong with me for being single. Sure I'm depressed, but it's not cause I don't have a boyfriend. It's too many unresolved issues that I'm working on

alphastreet said:

Yeah I already knew I didn't want to get involved at all with him, but lately I'm tired of people staying stuff to me, as if something is wrong with me for being single. Sure I'm depressed, but it's not cause I don't have a boyfriend. It's too many unresolved issues that I'm working on

I commend you for staying true to yourself and choosing to work on yourself rather than depend on a man to make you happy. So many women make that mistake and end up with a man who does more harm than good. Continue to work on yourself and nevermind what your family or anyone else says about you being single. My family does the same to me and every time I meet a guy and trying to get to know him, they are already asking "do you see him as someone you could marry?" when I'm not even down that path yet. Like yeesh, can I get to know a man first, see what he's about before hearing wedding bells? To me that's pathetic. I ignore it and keep it moving and stay true to myself. After all, I can do bad all by my damn self. You keep staying strong like you are and date when you get good and ready. Being single sometimes is way better than dealing with the stress of a relationship...but trust me, there's nothing wrong with being single. Good Luck and keep working on you!!!

Yeah I like the autonomy and freedom of being single and not having it feel like another job, cause that's what it feels like, at least to me, maybe not others. I'm not saying this to brag either, but people seem to think someone pretty should have one....

To tell you the truth, though I don't feel bad about myself for not having one, I do lack a proper father figure and get down cause of things that have happened in my life, but I know I have to learn to let go. And there's someone from afar I had feelings for for many years that I knew I couldn't have, but I didn't know it was that deep and me trying to fill a void, but I wasn't feeling unworthy either if I went long periods between dating people in real life, as I did see someone every few years for the past decade, maybe about 3 people though it didn't go far and I felt it wouldn't work cause of neediness, or trust issues cause of flirting with others or differences, and nowadays, the ones who are interested in me and I turn down are ones who have gotten in trouble for harassing their exes, whether they really did it or not, or are clingy or think so highly of themselves and feel they are self-righteous, acting like they are better than they are, even lying a lot to sound better and I always catch it. I know how to detect potential abuse sometimes so I stay away from suspicious people.

[Edited 9/6/11 20:48pm]

Yeah, but he's "VERY good looking"....

So just use him!

I was being nice, he's not that good looking, and definitely not after our convo and he's a "good Muslim", I'll be labelled a whore in his books in the end if he exposes me to his family and they tell mine....although it's okay for HIM to sleep around and have open relationships, love how the world works. Cause I know about his past, I want to stay away though and not put myself in a vulnerable situation

[Edited 9/6/11 21:07pm]

Oh, then in that case...forget him.

I just hate to see a hot guy go to waste!

He wasn't that good looking, I've seen so much better, and girls too occasionally. But I don't tell guys that when brushing them off, they actually get turned on by it and it defeats the purpose, tried that before and it doesn't work. And the best part, so what do you do if you don't think about dating, as if they think that's all girls think about all day! Not all are like that, some are, others don't make it their focus and there's more to life. Of course I have needs too but I don't let them define me, I believe in self-respect first and gaining trust.

[Edited 9/6/11 21:11pm]