...a controlling asshole! He makes me physically ill! I can not stand him!!! I can not stand him!!! I can not stand him!!!
He makes me sick!!! He's a piece of SHIT!! Frigging ASSHOLE!!!

Okay, have some of my some bourbon.

*sigh*

I am sorry...

Errr...It seems to me you have some kind of problem you would like to get off your chest.

2the9s said:

goes to buy Candy a carton of smokes... :O

CandyEyce said:

he doesn't know any other way

I just really need a drink and some cigarettes. I just really need a drink...

CalhounSq said:

Thanks.

CandyEyce said:

As Robin Harris used to say, you need to smoke you a drink...

I s theonly father i have ever known. When i was young i too hated his guts. There were times when i wished he would die. But when i got older and had children of my own, i have nothing but the utmost respect for a man who stuck it out and gave me a fighting chance at a life he never had.
I told him this face to face about ten years ago and we have been good friends ever since.

CE, i've been there. It isn't a great feeling coming from someone who part of you may despise.
I don't know how old you are because i can't open any profiles or even my own, but i can tell you time heals a few wounds.

Hope you don't mind if i share...

My father lived in another state while i was growing up. A raging alcoholic(are there any other kinds?), he was physically abusive, extremely self-centered, never sent my mother a dime raising his 4 kids, lost every job he's ever had...the list goes on and on.

But i am actually friends with him now. Not even sure why when i read my last paragraph , but i came to terms with who he was and what he could or couldn't do, not what i wanted him to be.

Although many of the characteristics i described above are still alive and well in him, he has been sober now for almost 20 yrs, so i know he cares in the only way he knows, but likely can't do much about it. He just doesn't know how to love someone like i needed when i was growing up.

Not without some reluctance, I also realized that he is a part of me and shutting him out of my life completely is like turning a part of me off. I am friends with him now and i don't put myself in a position to be hurt as his "son", but at a slight distance as a friend.

Like i said, i don't know your predicament, but hopefully you get to a place someday where his actions or person don't affect you as much as they do now. It's a long bumpy road to get there, but it's completely worth your peace of mind. i wish you well.

Shame...sucks when people use undeserving others in their path to penalize their
victims.

If you don't mind...could you give an example or two of what you consider "conrolling" to be, in the case of your father?

what doesnt he let u do?