So, I am wondering if any of you have had any office romances/ been extremely

sexually attracted to someone you work with. Tell me your story. Did you act on it?

How did it end? How did you manage to control yourself? What made them so desirable?

I ask because I am having one hell of a time controlling myself at work.

We have a new subject teacher for the week and he is so sexy. Everything about him

is just so yummy, from his looks and how he dresses to how he smells and the sound of

his voice.

I usually don’t mix business with pleasure, but I am at a loss.

From the time I get to work till the time I get off…I want to GET OFF with him.

I know it’s not right, and a bad idea, but the very smell of him makes me tremble.

When his back is turned, I have the strongest urge to run my hand up the back of

his shirt and grind against his wonderful ass.

It’s only day two of his being here and my mind is dragging around in the gutter 24/7.

I have already resorted to “taking care” of myself multiple times before bed just to

take the edge off, but it isn’t working. I just want to back him into one of the empty

rooms and unleash the beast. It is safe to say that I have never wanted someone

so bad in my life.

To make matters worse, I have been assigned to work one on one with him for the rest of the week and I am seriously dating someone.

If I don’t get it together soon, someone might get hurt…and I don’t think it’s going to be me.

What to do?

Sounds like a lot of potential for lots of trouble there.

I have the "fortune" to have worked at two companies now where I find some colleagues VERY attractive, too. The first one was a bigger company and there kinda sorta happened something a bit - bad idea. The one now is much smaller and I know better...

BAD idea.

Phishanga said:

Sounds like a lot of potential for lots of trouble there.

I have the "fortune" to have worked at two companies now where I find some colleagues VERY attractive, too. The first one was a bigger company and there kinda sorta happened something a bit - bad idea. The one now is much smaller and I know better...

BAD idea.

Kinda, sorta?

What made it "bad" in the end?

Does the fact that he will no longer work here after Friday make it less bad? ha-ha

O lord

Yes I have. Yes I acted on. It was an, mmm, interesting learning experience, lets say.

I have been since then and I'm sure I will be again, but I will never act on it. Not ever. Its actually a very strict personal rule. I'm a private person and I like to keep it that way. A lot of people say far too much about the personal and private parts of their lives at work because you spend so much time around those people you start to get comfortable and think they're all your friends. They're not. The reality is that pretty much anything personal you say about yourself or someone else is quickly going to get spread around the entire office. And whether or not its "right" that people take it into account when dealing with you, they will (on any number of levels).

I used to have a years long crush on one of my 3 bosses.

I never did anything about it. It was very interesting though how much my blood pressure went up when I had a meeting with him (I was wearing a 24 hour ambulatory BP monitor to diagnose my whitecoat hypertension )

I'd spend the days at work in that pleasantly aroused state (as I described in the undies thread)

ZombieKitten said:

I used to have a years long crush on one of my 3 bosses.

I never did anything about it. It was very interesting though how much my blood pressure went up when I had a meeting with him (I was wearing a 24 hour ambulatory BP monitor to diagnose my whitecoat hypertension )

I'd spend the days at work in that pleasantly aroused state (as I described in the undies thread)

Is it pleasant though? I feel like my skin is going to burn

off everytime he looks/speaks to me (which is pretty often).

Did your boss have a clue?

Cerebus said:

Yes I have. Yes I acted on. It was an, mmm, interesting learning experience, lets say.

I have been since then and I'm sure I will be again, but I will never act on it. Not ever. Its actually a very strict personal rule. I'm a private person and I like to keep it that way. A lot of people say far too much about the personal and private parts of their lives at work because you spend so much time around those people you start to get comfortable and think they're all your friends. They're not. The reality is that pretty much anything personal you say about yourself or someone else is quickly going to get spread around the entire office. And whether or not its "right" that people take it into account when dealing with you, they will (on any number of levels).

Thank you for sharing and for the advice, I appreciate it.

LadyCasanova said:

ZombieKitten said:

I used to have a years long crush on one of my 3 bosses.

I never did anything about it. It was very interesting though how much my blood pressure went up when I had a meeting with him (I was wearing a 24 hour ambulatory BP monitor to diagnose my whitecoat hypertension )

I'd spend the days at work in that pleasantly aroused state (as I described in the undies thread)

Is it pleasant though? I feel like my skin is going to burn

off everytime he looks/speaks to me (which is pretty often).

Did your boss have a clue?

for me it IS

I'd go home and take it out on my innocent bystander

and no, I would have been mortified if he'd known

ZombieKitten said:

LadyCasanova said:

Is it pleasant though? I feel like my skin is going to burn

off everytime he looks/speaks to me (which is pretty often).

Did your boss have a clue?

for me it IS

I'd go home and take it out on my innocent bystander

and no, I would have been mortified if he'd known

You'd do your man even though you were "hot" for the boss?

I wish I could do that. I was hot for the work guy while making out

with the guy I'm dating and I felt like shit b/c I knew he wasn't

the one who turned me on and he totally thought he was. Ended in his

confusion and me sending him away. I wonder what the guys think...

LadyCasanova said:

ZombieKitten said:

for me it IS

I'd go home and take it out on my innocent bystander

and no, I would have been mortified if he'd known

You'd do your man even though you were "hot" for the boss?

I wish I could do that. I was hot for the work guy while making out

with the guy I'm dating and I felt like shit b/c I knew he wasn't

the one who turned me on and he totally thought he was. Ended in his

confusion and me sending him away. I wonder what the guys think...

sure

lucky for him I get crushes like that all the time

LadyCasanova said:

ZombieKitten said:

for me it IS

I'd go home and take it out on my innocent bystander

and no, I would have been mortified if he'd known

You'd do your man even though you were "hot" for the boss?

I wish I could do that. I was hot for the work guy while making out

with the guy I'm dating and I felt like shit b/c I knew he wasn't

the one who turned me on and he totally thought he was. Ended in his

confusion and me sending him away. I wonder what the guys think...

I think that some guys would be mad, some guys would be fine with it and some guys would never have a clue. Any guy who is even a little bit self-aware regarding his relationship and sex life should know that his woman is not always thinking about him, though. I hope they are some of the time, particularly when I appear to be doing something right. But I know very well from research I've read and discussions I've had that they're not. Not all they time, anyway, so its really not anything to get in a bunch about. If we're having great sex the cause doesn't really matter (for me).

Cerebus said:

LadyCasanova said:

You'd do your man even though you were "hot" for the boss?

I wish I could do that. I was hot for the work guy while making out

with the guy I'm dating and I felt like shit b/c I knew he wasn't

the one who turned me on and he totally thought he was. Ended in his

confusion and me sending him away. I wonder what the guys think...

I think that some guys would be mad, some guys would be fine with it and some guys would never have a clue. Any guy who is even a little bit self-aware regarding his relationship and sex life should know that his woman is not always thinking about him, though. I hope they are some of the time, particularly when I appear to be doing something right. But I know very well from research I've read and discussions I've had that they're not. Not all they time, anyway, so its really not anything to get in a bunch about. If we're having great sex the cause doesn't really matter (for me).

I read an article once in a newspaper supplement years ago about inviting a third person into the marriage - in fantasy only, HER fantasy. It sounded good to me!

ZombieKitten said:

Cerebus said:

I think that some guys would be mad, some guys would be fine with it and some guys would never have a clue. Any guy who is even a little bit self-aware regarding his relationship and sex life should know that his woman is not always thinking about him, though. I hope they are some of the time, particularly when I appear to be doing something right. But I know very well from research I've read and discussions I've had that they're not. Not all they time, anyway, so its really not anything to get in a bunch about. If we're having great sex the cause doesn't really matter (for me).

I read an article once in a newspaper supplement years ago about inviting a third person into the marriage - in fantasy only, HER fantasy. It sounded good to me!

Uh-huh! A lot of men fantasize about having sex with two women, but that doesn't necessarilly mean one of them is his girlfriend or wife. And ask a man about having another man in bed with he and his wife and see now many of them even pause before they're like, "ah hell no!" Personally, I'm not bothered by either, but I don't believe in marraige and I don't think relationships are meant to last forever, so go figure!

Cerebus said:

ZombieKitten said:

I read an article once in a newspaper supplement years ago about inviting a third person into the marriage - in fantasy only, HER fantasy. It sounded good to me!

Uh-huh! A lot of men fantasize about having sex with two women, but that doesn't necessarilly mean one of them is his girlfriend or wife. And ask a man about having another man in bed with he and his wife and see now many of them even pause before they're like, "ah hell no!" Personally, I'm not bothered by either, but I don't believe in marraige and I don't think relationships are meant to last forever, so go figure!

I couldn't care less what/who HE is thinking about, as long as it's ME he is touching

He once told me about a woman he saw once and was very attracted to, I covered his eyes and told him to pretend I was HER

it was HOT

ZombieKitten said:

Cerebus said:

Uh-huh! A lot of men fantasize about having sex with two women, but that doesn't necessarilly mean one of them is his girlfriend or wife. And ask a man about having another man in bed with he and his wife and see now many of them even pause before they're like, "ah hell no!" Personally, I'm not bothered by either, but I don't believe in marraige and I don't think relationships are meant to last forever, so go figure!

I couldn't care less what/who HE is thinking about, as long as it's ME he is touching

He once told me about a woman he saw once and was very attracted to, I covered his eyes and told him to pretend I was HER

it was HOT

Umm... yes... that's hot way over here.

Cerebus said:

ZombieKitten said:

I couldn't care less what/who HE is thinking about, as long as it's ME he is touching

He once told me about a woman he saw once and was very attracted to, I covered his eyes and told him to pretend I was HER

it was HOT

Umm... yes... that's hot way over here.

I put a poster of Javier Bardem up on my bedroom door once just to annoy him, but sometimes during sex he'd tell me to look at the poster

Yes, I had sex with a coworker. We both had recently gone through divorces. We discussed the aspect of "just sex" before we started anything. We were both fine with it and there was a definite attraction between the two of us. It was some of the best sex of my life ! We were both single and had a lot of fun. We both knew when it was time to end it. We remained friends after that.

Wow Lady Cassanova sounds like you have it bad. Work place attraction can be very messy. If/when things go sideways it makes for a very uncomfortable situation. But is he only going to be around for a week? With work, if there's a possibility that you two will be working together for a number of years or one of you may supervise the other in the future, it's probably not a good idea. If that's not the case, go for it. You only live once but if you're serious about the guy you're dating, you might not wanna have sex with the hot guy immediately but get to know him first because once you sleep together, you probably are going to regret it in the future. We all want to have great sex, but sometimes it's not worth it, especially when you can find it outside of the workplace. By the way, I wouldn't tell your man you were thinking of another while making out with him. There are somethings us guys don't need to know. Personally, I've had a couple of ladies at the office make sexual advances towards me but I refused because I wasn't as attracted, plus I'm a supervisor and I don't need someone suing for sexual harassment. Plus none of them looked like Rosario Dawson, which may have changed things for me. Good luck!

I was going to post a lengthy and moral response, then thought better of it.

Just break him off a piece and be done with it!

He'll be gone in a week and you won't have any of that awkward workplace stuff.

ZombieKitten said:

Cerebus said:

Uh-huh! A lot of men fantasize about having sex with two women, but that doesn't necessarilly mean one of them is his girlfriend or wife. And ask a man about having another man in bed with he and his wife and see now many of them even pause before they're like, "ah hell no!" Personally, I'm not bothered by either, but I don't believe in marraige and I don't think relationships are meant to last forever, so go figure!

I couldn't care less what/who HE is thinking about, as long as it's ME he is touching

He once told me about a woman he saw once and was very attracted to, I covered his eyes and told him to pretend I was HER

it was HOT

ZombieKitten-

That is hot.

I once worked my (ex) man into a frenzy when I realized that he had a thing for

Danica Patrick (who I also think is hot), and described/acted out what I/we would do

if we brought Danica Patrick home with us from the bar. I majored in English, which

is like majoring in description... he still talks about that night to this day ha-ha.

Cerebus-

THANK YOU! (for what you bolded). People usually think I'm crazy when

I say those things.

[Edited 6/28/11 21:08pm]

PurpleJedi said:

I was going to post a lengthy and moral response, then thought better of it.

Just break him off a piece and be done with it!

He'll be gone in a week and you won't have any of that awkward workplace stuff.

And what of the guy who I am dating, who trusts and cares for me?

Just good ol "sucks to be you" or "what you don't know won't hurt you"?

Better yet...I could lie and say "I slipped and fell on it."

[Edited 6/28/11 21:08pm]

LadyCasanova said:

ZombieKitten-

That is hot.

I once worked my (ex) man into a frenzy when I realized that he had a thing for

Danica Patrick (who I also think is hot), and described/acted out what I/we would do

if we brought Danica Patrick home with us from the bar. I majored in English, which

is like majoring in description... he still talks about that night to this day ha-ha.

LadyCasanova said:

PurpleJedi said:

I was going to post a lengthy and moral response, then thought better of it.

Just break him off a piece and be done with it!

He'll be gone in a week and you won't have any of that awkward workplace stuff.

And what of the guy who I am dating, who trusts and cares for me?

Just good ol "sucks to be you" or "what you don't know won't hurt you"?

Better yet...I could lie and say "I slipped and fell on it."

Oh-! Wait...I missed that part!

No, no, no. If you're in a relationship, then walk away. I'm sorry but I missed that part.

If you decide to act on your impulse/urge while committed to someone else, then it cheapens you. Keep the fantasy, use it for the greater good even! But don't go near Mr. Wonderful.

There was a thread about this very subject a few weeks ago.

If the two of you work in the same department or have to interact professionally in any way, there's a very good chance things could turn quite messy if you decide to have sex with the other person. Many times you start out thinking you can handle it but often times it doesn't work out too well. Weigh all the pros and cons and decide if you are really willing to take that risk.

Now, if you work in Accounting and you want to screw someone who works in the IT area where you don't have to conduct business with them, then I'd say go for it!

I've had sex with a guy in my department and it was the MACK! However, if the opportunity presented itself again, I'd NEVER do it. Too many emotions ended up getting involved and it made for a very uncomfortable situation. And what made it even worse is we were close friends before it happened.

[Edited 6/30/11 16:12pm]

^^ I don't think I would actually have sex with him,

I just want to have a little fun. How far is too far?

He leaves tomorrow, I just have to last one more

day, I CAN DO IT!!!

LadyCasanova said:

^^ I don't think I would actually have sex with him,

I just want to have a little fun. How far is too far?

He leaves tomorrow, I just have to last one more

day, I CAN DO IT!!!

LOOK but don't TOUCH!

Not at work, but in university, I had a MAJOR attraction to a professor.

He was...something. From France, he taught physiology, so you can imagine. He was in his early 30's, had lovely black hair, slim built, a great smile..and a French accent that made me go crazy with desire. I found out he was unmarried, and had no gf.

He also had a great personality, loved laughing, and talking about his travels. He seemed like a real gentleman.

Anyways, I was very much attracted to him. I looked forward to seeing him every class, took every oppurtunity I could to go talk to him. I remember he used to always want me to come see him in his office. Like...always! I would always give him the choice...like for a paper, I need feedback. I say "I can send it by e-mail or come over and we talk about it". He's always say "come over".

And sometimes, when were together, we'd just drift off and talk about anything. Like intellectual talk. He'd talk about his experiments, articles he's written in various science journals (which I was impressed with), his travels. Then we talked about politics, and i realized we share a lot of views. One time we spent an hour an a half just talking (that's not including time we spent on the assignment).

And I'd...tease him. Cuz that's just what I do. I'm not without looks, so I...embellished. Wore contacts, lined my eyes with kohl, straightened my hair to show off it's true length, and the occasional low cut shirt (IT WAS TASTEFUL!). He'd come sit closer to me everytime I did that. Truth be told, I enjoyed the closeness.

We just like being together. I liked the feeling I had when I was with him. I felt appreciated, and smart. I got to a point where I wondered if I was in love. I wasn't sure...and I was hoping he'd get the point and when classes were over, he might say "let's be friends". Which isn't uncommon. I still keep contact with some of my teachers from high school. Also, cuz he's older, I figured he might be the one to make the first move. I really wanted to see where we could take this.

But when the exam was over..he didn't do anything. Not a proper goodbye, nothing. He didn't even look me in the eye on exam day.

I was crushed. And embarassed. I wondered if I should've said anything. And why HE didnt say anything. I mean, I know some of y'all might say "You should've said something", well, I'm sick of always having to make the first move. Seriously, I did a ton to indicate I was interested, and he chose not to act on it. I guess maybe it showed he had respect for me, but he didn't even say goodbye...

The last thing I gave him was a copy of my notes (which he complimented me on for their neatness and colour), and a note saying thank you for being my teacher.

But for months, I felt really....depressed. I wondered what was wrong with me. Was I not pretty enough? I wasn't his type? What was it about me that was wrong? I felt really bad...and at some points...i still do.

But eh, that's life.

In terms of advice, if you feel there's something worth exploring and the time is right, say something and talk about it. Don't end up like me..thinking of "what if's". But since you're already dating someone, you reaaaaallly need to think it thru. If you don't see him as "the one" or someone you'd like to pursue a relationship with, then he just ain't worth it. A roll in the hay ain't worth jeopardizing a good, stable relationship.

[Edited 7/1/11 0:29am]

Sex and work is a bad idea.

Having sex with someone you work with is a bad idea.

Having sex AT work is a bad idea.

Considering sex as a valid form of employment/work is ALSO a bad idea....