IceNine said:

I'm surprised you haven't yet said, "No highs, no lows, must be Bose."

Swiped from Usenet...


From: "Paul D."
Newsgroups: alt.home-theater.misc
Subject: History of Bose
Date: Mon, 23 Jul 2001 23:22:27 -0700


A friend of mine snagged this little info packet before it was ordered to be destroyed by Amar Bose. Wow, now I see why he had such a fit!

1964-Founding Of Bose
In the 1950s, Rev. Dr. Amar Buffet Bose IX observed loudspeakers didn't deliver natural sound. Extensive research into the science of sound, lasting all of 20 minutes, led to the formation of Bose Corporation.

1968-Birth Of A Legend
The legendary 901?Direct/Reflecting?speaker is introduced, coming down from the sky playing "Carmina Burana." It reflects 89% of the sound off walls ?similar to a live concert taped by a bootlegger with his Fisher Price tape
deck ?for natural, lifelike sound.

1969-Double Blind Test
Bose pioneers the double blind test, wherein Bose speakers are placed in a room and our competitors' speakers are placed in a high school gym. The first man to hear our speakers leaves the room saying: "No highs, no lows --
it must be a Bose."

1972-Pro Loudspeakers
Bose enters the professional ranks by producing a loudspeaker system designed exclusively for the demanding, discriminating tastes of the professional musician.
Unfortunately, these people didn't buy our products.

1972-Syncom?Testing Computer
Bose establishes the proprietary Syncom computer to acoustically measure speakers against a laboratory model to guarantee a level of consistency and reliability. The next day the computer crashes and is never repaired.

1973-Promotional Offer
Bose invents potato salad. This comes free with any purchase over $5,000.

1975-World's Best-Seller
The 301?Direct/Reflecting?speaker system is launched into space following the Apollo 17 mission. Renowned Bose technologies, versatile design and affordability make it one of the world's best-selling speakers. Too bad it
doesn't sound very good.

1982-Moving Sound
Bose introduces a custom-designed, factory-installed system specifically for automobiles. Some of the world's most luxurious cars today, including Hyundai and Yugo, feature Bose sound systems.

1983-Immobile Sound
Hyundai and Yugo drop our speakers from their available options, as a result of their quality control standards.

1984-Acoustic Waveguide
Bose designs acoustic waveguide technology and brings component system sound to a compact system with a side order of fries. Experience full sound with rich bass from an extremely small enclosure which sounds just as bad as
you've come to expect from Bose.

1985-Advertising
Bose dupes 101,031 people into buying our speakers as a result of an aggressive advertising campaign.

1986-Acoustimass?Speaker Technology
Acoustimass speaker technology is born at 3:05 p.m. weighing 6 lbs. 3 oz. Room filling sound is available without a room full of equipment. Virtually Invisible?speaker design includes cube speaker arrays and compact module. By cutting out the insides of the cube speakers, they can be used to make high quality ice cubes at no additional charge.

1987-Inventor Of The Year
Acoustic waveguide technology creates a stir in the scientific community, earning Dr. Bose and Dr. William Short "Inventor of the Year?honors. Those who determined the "Inventor of the Year" picked up their checks in the mail shortly thereafter.

1989-Acoustic Noise Cancelling?Headsets
Bose Acoustic Noise Cancelling headsets are created to bring clear communication and protection into the cockpit for pilots and on the ground for air and ground crew.
They work incredibly well at cancelling all sound in the headsets. Plane crashes have increased every year since.

1990-Lifestyle?Systems
Bose develops Lifestyle?systems. Our proprietary system design approach and Virtually Invisible?speaker design create an unmatched level of performance and design, unless you include any speaker that is made by our competitors.

1993-Wave?Radio
The Wave radio, the world's finest sounding radio (in our unbiased opinion), is introduced. Acoustic waveguide technology delivers rich, deep sound ?not previously heard from an enclosure this ridiculously overpriced.

1994-Auditioner?Audio Demonstrator
Auditioner audio demonstrator is created by our renowned engineer Mortimer M. McMarmocet. You hear the exact acoustic performance of a building's proposed sound system before the building is constructed for the amazingly
low price of $1 million dollars plus a $200,000 surcharge for installation. Potato salad not included.

1995-Jewel Cube?Speaker
Bose designs the Jewel Cube speaker to bring high performance sound down to size ?easily hidden behind your hand, which a lot of our customers requested, since many routinely play hide & seek with their speakers.

IceNine said:

To be fair, mine wasn't a flame.