I tell people that me and my wife choose not to have kids..... and people look at me all crazy:-o . Some people just quickly judge us that we are bad people or something because we don't want kids. I really like kids, but with my busy lifestyle I don't feel that I have the time to raise kids. I don't want to have kids if I can't give it a 100%. I just don't know why people don't understand? People seemed to be so rude about the subject. I'm able to have kids... I just don't want them at this point in my life. I think it is ok not to want kids. Does anybody else on the org have the same problem?

I know it has to be really tough for a women. Some people act like how can a woman not a child. This is something my wife has to deal with all the time.

Yeah, I always think people can be real assholes about this. Personally I'd like to have kids, but it's amazing to me how rude ppl can be about folks who choose not to.

I have a good friend from college that she is unable to have a child and she is currently destroyed. Her and her husband had fertility testing and it is her that can't have a baby. I don't know what to say to her?

jaimestarr79 said:

i don't want kids and i couldn't care less what anyone thinks about it.

Those people should mind their own business

So many people have kids not being ready and the kids are the ones who suffer. I have one daughter and people are always amazed I only have one and wonder why I didn't ever have more! If I ever have another child I would want to spend a lot of time with them, not be working all day and only get to see them a few hours.

whistle said:

I understand. Heck, I've got a kid, but people look at me all crazy when I say I don't want another! Actually... I'd like another, but I'd rather adopt.

In any case, having a kid is a big personal decision. Doesn't much matter what others think.

i'll go this thread one further: i don't particularly like children. there, i said it.

i don't hate them or feel the need to be rude to them, but i prefer the company of adults.

whistle said:

Serious said:

whistle said:

i'll go this thread one further: i don't particularly like children. there, i said it.

i don't hate them or feel the need to be rude to them, but i prefer the company of adults.

Well thank God you don't have any then.

i'm sure having them would change me. i reckon there are loads of parents who used to get ill at the thought of having kids, but they grew into it.

I am someone who has never wanted kids. I went through a phase around age 28-30 where I had irrational pangs of wanting one even though I was in no position to have one but that was really just hormonal, I think.

I don’t recall that anyone has ever looked down on me for it, though. I have had a few ask questions and clearly fiound it unusual that I wouldn’t want one as a woman, but I didn’t feel any judgment, at least not too badly.

I’m worried about it being a sore subject with my bf. He wants kids, I don’t. We’ve talked about it numerous times and I’ve told him there’s a 2% chance I could change my mind but mostly I think it’s not in my future. And he’s free to leave me and find someone to have a baby with if that’s what he really wants.

I think I’m too old. I’ll be 36 in June and we have a ways to go before we’d be ready for something like that (if ever).

I think many people feel obligated to have kids as soon as they marry. There is so much pressure from parents, grandparents, family, friends, etc. I think too often people have kids when they are not mentally and financially ready to have them. That's why alot of these kids are off the chain and out of control because their parents weren't prepared to raise them properly. People don't realize the commitment in raising a child not to mention the financial cost. Alot of people can't afford to take care of themselves let alone themselves + a child. And once you have one...people often feel obligated to have more than one child so the single child won't grow up by itself.

I adore my little nephews but I'll be damned if I want a kid.

perhaps one girl and one boy when I'm 38-42... but right now :

I've been getting that since the fifth grade. I knew then I didn't want any children.

It wasn't connected to being gay either. I didn't see that as a reason I wouldn't or couldn't have children.

Sitting around with friends discussing how many children we wanted when we grew up, I was the only one who said none.

There are days when I wish I was a father, but it always passes.

I used to be under a lot of pressure because of a particular feature to have children, but seeing as their was/is no guarantee that a child would inherit a specific feature, I saw no reason to try for one to please others.

I do like children, just never wanted any of my own.

Any home can be full of love and commapssion with or without children... great families can come in all forms.

Sometimes people just get too stuck on themselves and like to judge others to feel better about their own situation, they use any means to do it.

whistle said:

i'll go this thread one further: i don't particularly like children. there, i said it.

i don't hate them or feel the need to be rude to them, but i prefer the company of adults.

I understand that.

That doesn't make you a bad person.

Children can be taxing.

I love playing with children, I seem to be a natural, even as an adult.

I was with my partner at a friend's house for Thanksgiving, playing with their 3 young boys running around the house with them. Their mother finally screamed at me (!) to stop it and everyone burst out laughing. These boys were having a great time and just started getting loud with that screaming/laughing thing.

Shw was wondering what had her boys going like that -and of course, running through the house.

I was in my mid-20's at the time.

My nieces and nephews same way. I have a nephew who is an only boy, so whenever I visited I would play just with him for a couple of hours, roughousing. Picking him up and throwing him on the couch. He loved it. He couldn't wrestle or anything with his sisters. Of course for the rest of my visit, he just wanted me to play with him.

I'll probably never be a parent in my lifetime...and that's cool with me.

Timmy84 said:

I'll probably never be a parent in my lifetime...and that's cool with me.

you're like a father to me, man

JoeTyler said:

Timmy84 said:

I'll probably never be a parent in my lifetime...and that's cool with me.

you're like a father to me, man

How do these people know you don't want kids in the first place?

If their reaction bothers you, the solution is simple - don't tell them.

Genesia said:

How do these people know you don't want kids in the first place?

If their reaction bothers you, the solution is simple - don't tell them.

They tend to keep asking.

SUPRMAN said:

Genesia said:

How do these people know you don't want kids in the first place?

If their reaction bothers you, the solution is simple - don't tell them.

They tend to keep asking.

yep, that question and "why are you still single", or "why you don't wanna get married"?

SUPRMAN said:

Genesia said:

How do these people know you don't want kids in the first place?

If their reaction bothers you, the solution is simple - don't tell them.

They tend to keep asking.

The fact that they ask does not mean one is obligated to answer.

Genesia said:

SUPRMAN said:

They tend to keep asking.

The fact that they ask does not mean one is obligated to answer.

True, but that's awkward.

I'm a single Mom and don't want another...especially in this world of TODAY....FUCK NO!

If you don't want children then so be, your decision keep it moving!

SUPRMAN said:

Genesia said:

The fact that they ask does not mean one is obligated to answer.

True, but that's awkward.

It shouldn't be.

Asking deeply personal, noneofyerbusiness questions like, "When are you going to have children?" is rude. People who do that don't deserve an answer.

I refer you to Ann Landers's Golden Rules for Living...specifically, number 12.

1. If you open it, close it.
2. If you turn it on, turn it off.
3. If you unlock it, lock it up.
4. If you break it, admit it.
5. If you can't fix it, call in someone who can.
6. If you borrow it, return it.
7. If you value it, take care of it.
8. If you make a mess, clean it up.
9. If you move it, put it back.
10. If it belongs to someone else, get permission to use it.
11. If you don't know how to operate, leave it alone.
12. If it's none of your business, don't ask questions.

lol...

I want babies. Hell, that's something I look forward to. But finding the right guy..

Oh well, I keep gettin' asked "Why you still single?", "Why don't you have a man?", or the more unusual question some dumbass woman asked my father "did you sell her into marriage yet?!"

Mutha...

I nearly slapped her for that.