Had a pretty weird first date this week.

I sued a guy for placing balconies that invade my privacy big time. When I shower, take a bath, lie in bed, am in my garden or living room, all these formerly private areas are now open to public because of these balconies.

So, after the first law suit that I lost, (which I knew beoforehand, however because of that he could not sell his newly renovated appartement with balcony )

the owner (not inhabitant) of that building came by in order to make a deal with me.

So we met tuesday.

We liked eachother.

We talked, not about the balconies, just about a lot of stuf, he took me out for dinner with his best friend, we went out for a drink, I stayed over at his place (a was a lady, did not make out).

He wanted to make out, however I wanted to get to know him before I would get intimat (I attach easily, it's just for self protection ) He said he loved spending time with me.

That was two days ago.

Haven't heard from him since.

I got irritated by his silent treatment and googled him.

He appears to be rich, compare fortunes top ... list. He didn't bother to tell me that.

Do you think it is impolite not to call for two days after a special day/night together?

Do you think it is impolite not to tell a person you'r multi millionaire (I do think that's impolite)

I just don't know what to think. And I hate it that he didn't call me yet Even just to tell me he's not interested. Just don't give me the silent treatment

just to be sure we understand the guy you spent time with is NOT the guy you sued... correct?

aside from that he sounds like a typical male... mind you, he may never call... even more typical...

also leave money out of it, if you like him then like him for who he is, it works out better that way...

If he had said "I would love to spend MORE time with you" then I'd be annoyed he doesn't call

but he kind of summed it up and gave it closure, it was like a "thank you, that was fun (shame we didn't have sex, but that's how it goes sometimes)"

Yes, it's the guy I sued. Well, first law suit wasn't personal actually. Next one will be aimed at his personal company.....

We have been talking on the phone. We both allways were very polite and never got personal. However, we do have this issue.

In order to prefend me from going to sue him by civil law, knowing that I stand a better change, and just because the whole court thing is hazardous, we agreed to meet and try to settle without a second court case.

We ended up getting involved with eachother, dating the same evening and in bed that night (hand above the blankets ).

The issue still is not resolved. I still might have to drag him to court.

Besides our legal issues, we had a 'thing going' from the first moment we met. Last tuesday. Before that, we hadn't seen eachother in person.

I like the man very much so. Already liked him when I did not know his status. Now that I know, I just feel as if I was this spoiled kid's toy. Just don't know his intentions. Man with money are used to get their way. So they have not been in the position to adjust to the world and learn from that and have a healthy personla development. And he acts that way by not calling me.

ZombieKitten said:

If he had said "I would love to spend MORE time with you" then I'd be annoyed he doesn't call

but he kind of summed it up and gave it closure, it was like a "thank you, that was fun (shame we didn't have sex, but that's how it goes sometimes)"

He did say that. He wanted to get to know me better and have at least 10 dates. That's why I got confused that he did not call me.

And then I googled him........

[Edited 2/17/11 19:05pm]

Well, I guess I was brave stepping out. Now I learned my lesson again. Back to estrogen hell

dJJ said:

ZombieKitten said:

If he had said "I would love to spend MORE time with you" then I'd be annoyed he doesn't call

but he kind of summed it up and gave it closure, it was like a "thank you, that was fun (shame we didn't have sex, but that's how it goes sometimes)"

He did say that. He wanted to get to know me better and have at least 10 dates. That's why I got confused that he did not call me.

And then I googled him........

crap

Yep

At least I do contribute to the org and the beautiful....and As the org Turns...

Everyobody has their share. My dating experiences this week keep the script juicy I hope.

I don't think he did anything wrong.

I mean, you wanted to talk to him and you didn't call...I'd say you're the one that is playing some sort of game.

When I left we agreed he would call me. I told him I didn't like to be the 'hunting' one. He said he would call.

You'r right that I'm the one creating the problem, I have no patience. I think he could have called by now.

Personally....from what you've said, I think the whole thing is a sketchy situation.

But honestly, most guys call when they are interested. Those that don't are either not interested or playing silly games which, to me, is a massive turn off.

dJJ said:

ZombieKitten said:

If he had said "I would love to spend MORE time with you" then I'd be annoyed he doesn't call

but he kind of summed it up and gave it closure, it was like a "thank you, that was fun (shame we didn't have sex, but that's how it goes sometimes)"

He did say that. He wanted to get to know me better and have at least 10 dates. That's why I got confused that he did not call me.

And then I googled him........

[Edited 2/17/11 19:05pm]

maybe when you're wealthy you really busy...

I wouldn't know so perhaps you're in luck...

I agree. I justed hoped he wasn't like that. I don't like playing games at all. It's a very bad sign that it's already heading that way.

I guess that's the reason that I'm dissapointed. I know I don't want a man who likes powerplay in that sense. And therefore I know I have to let him go, even before we really know eachother. I just don't want to get involved in that.

The thing is, he really did seem not te be a man like that, I did not expect him to be a player or emotionally manipulative. Well....I just wait and see. I guess my judgement was wrong.

Will keep you posted.

dJJ said:

nd33 said:

Whoops, forgot to answer the question in title... I think if two weekends go by since the initial date without a next one being arranged then he's prob not interested. So you've got another week and a half of this agonizing in my book!

DAAAAMN!!!

[img:$uid]http://www.gifs.../img:$uid] GIFSoup

RenHoek said:

bet he put the balcony to spy on u and watches u with binoculars or a telescope?

purplemookiebut said:

bet he put the balcony to spy on u and watches u with binoculars or a telescope?

He joked that he would keep the appartment for himself now he knows what the view is...

He wants to sell the appartment and I want him to let it to someone I know, so I can influence who can see me bathing....

He said I'm trying to control life too much. He's right. However, in general. I still think he shouln't sell the appartment. And I want compensation for value loss of mine. He doesn't want to give that.

He will call me anyway, because we still haven't solved anything

nd33 said:

dJJ said:

When I left we agreed he would call me. I told him I didn't like to be the 'hunting' one. He said he would call.

You'r right that I'm the one creating the problem, I have no patience. I think he could have called by now.

Chill the f out. 2 days is nothing. Go date someone else in the meantime and get your mind off this person that you've been out with ONE time. :LOL:

That answered my question. I'm involved too much. Already. I got it.

[Edited 2/18/11 4:10am]

I'm missing something. Did the owner put in a balcony as an addition on the home or was a new apt bldg with balconies constructed next to your place?

Anyway, it sounds to me like he was engaging you in order to prevent you from suing him again.

JustErin said:

babynoz said:

I'm missing something. Did the owner put in a balcony as an addition on the home or was a new apt bldg with balconies constructed next to your place?

Anyway, it sounds to me like he was engaging you in order to prevent you from suing him again.

It was an addition.

He owns a lot of property. His family owned the building for decades. He sold the upper appartment 2 years ago. Without balcony.

The first floor was rented out to an old lady. She left, so he renovated that apparment too and wants to sell it now. So he installed the balcony to get a better price for the appartment and inspired the owner of the upper appartment also to installed his. It was a joined action. So, I'll have to sue the owner of the upper appartment too.

I don't believe he was engaging me to prefent me from suing. He's got a laywer in his office for 3 days a week, just to handle his law suits. He's not impressed with mine. He does want to get away as cheap as possible wiht the issue I have with him though. He doesn't like to loose any money.

I'm angry because he'll make more money on that appartment at the cost of my privacy and daily quality of my house.

dJJ said:

babynoz said:

I'm missing something. Did the owner put in a balcony as an addition on the home or was a new apt bldg with balconies constructed next to your place?

Anyway, it sounds to me like he was engaging you in order to prevent you from suing him again.

It was an addition.

He owns a lot of property. His family owned the building for decades. He sold the upper appartment 2 years ago. Without balcony.

The first floor was rented out to an old lady. She left, so he renovated that apparment too and wants to sell it now. So he installed the balcony to get a better price for the appartment and inspired the owner of the upper appartment also to installed his. It was a joined action. So, I'll have to sue the owner of the upper appartment too.

I don't believe he was engaging me to prefent me from suing. He's got a laywer in his office for 3 days a week, just to handle his law suits. He's not impressed with mine. He does want to get away as cheap as possible wiht the issue I have with him though. He doesn't like to loose any money.

I'm angry because he'll make more money on that appartment at the cost of my privacy and daily quality of my house.

An addition, okay.

I was thinking that he was trying to settle and prevent you from suing again because you said...

In order to prefend me from going to sue him by civil law, knowing that I stand a better change, and just because the whole court thing is hazardous, we agreed to meet and try to settle without a second court case.

He may very well like you as a person but after one date he isn't obligated to disclose his financial position to someone who sued him in the past and may do so again. At this point a definitive relationship doesn't exist.

Folks are busy..............sounds like he was feeling u out.

Graycap23 said:

Folks are busy..............sounds like he was feeling u out.

Obviously we don't know eachother yet. So we both don't know if we want to be in a definite relationship with eachother.

It's just that he evoked feelings. And I would want to spend time with him, I want to have fun again. And I really do want to get to know him.

I'm not a patient person. Pretty impulsive. So, I called him. He didn't answer.

I'll keep you posted for the next episode

dJJ said:

Obviously we don't know eachother yet. So we both don't know if we want to be in a definite relationship with eachother.

It's just that he evoked feelings. And I would want to spend time with him, I want to have fun again. And I really do want to get to know him.

I'm not a patient person. Pretty impulsive. So, I called him. He didn't answer.

I'll keep you posted for the next episode

U are suing the guy............he mind is on lawsuits.....not dates.

[Edited 2/18/11 7:13am]

first - would echo what the other guy said ... as far as ... 2 days is nothin ....

second . i am kinda astonished that you can sue someone ... for this kinda stuff ... i mean ... with my real estate background ... when you buy something .... you have to look to see what others can do to THEIR properties ... that might impact your property ... and .... well ... they are entitled to their rights .... just as you are ...

so in short .... i dont get how someone can sue over that kinda thing .. .but hey ... maybe I am old school ...

^

First court case was against the government, I disagreed they gave him a permit for the balconies. If I would have won that one, he would have to remove the balconies.

I lost it becuase I was one week too late with my objection.

Now I can sue him, according to Dutch law, he should have informed me about his plans. He interprets that law in a different way.

He only saw tha balconies tuesday and he did agree they were massive and disturbing. He didn't realize that when he had it drawn up on paper. So, I just hope he will try to work with me and rent out the place to someone I know. And not sell it to some stranger I don't know.

I really don't think the balcony issue is an anterior motive to invite me to come along for dinner with his friend and spend so much time together. His friend (who has been his friend for 20 years) first didn't believe we just knew eachother for 4 hours, because we got along as if we had known eachother for years....