i thought this news broke a while ago?

XxAxX said:

didn't nobody mention oprah? isn't that a double negative? I hate's all the bad grammar on the org.

tell me about it.

BlackAdder7 said:

XxAxX said:

didn't nobody mention oprah? isn't that a double negative? I hate's all the bad grammar on the org.

someone needs a spankin'

they got differnt fathers tho......

heybaby said:

ZombieKitten said:

I have a friend who knew all her life she was adopted.

When she was 18 she tracked down her birth mother. Turns out she married her birth father and had 2 more kids - blow number one, she was excluded from the "family"

then her mother and one of the brothers wanted nothing to do with her (blow number 2) father would have but mother talked him out of it

she started seeing the other brother but he turned out to be a flake that never answered her calls

blow number 3

I'm not saying don't do it, just that nothing will be what you dreamed, and can end in HORRIBLE heartache - for my friend, this was last straw, to be DOUBLE rejected by your family, she ended up clinically depressed and in and out of psychiatric hospital

why did they reject her? what happened?

it was 1970, both were at university and unmarried, middle-class families where unwed mother is simply NOT acceptable

ZombieKitten said:

heybaby said:

why did they reject her? what happened?

it was 1970, both were at university and unmarried, middle-class families where unwed mother is simply NOT acceptable

and I guess the second time around was out of guilt about the first time around I really have no reason why they so strongly rejected her the second time! It nearly killed my friend. Last I heard she was a reclusive, medicated, swollen person I can't even recognise

ZombieKitten said:

ZombieKitten said:

it was 1970, both were at university and unmarried, middle-class families where unwed mother is simply NOT acceptable

and I guess the second time around was out of guilt about the first time around I really have no reason why they so strongly rejected her the second time! It nearly killed my friend. Last I heard she was a reclusive, medicated, swollen person I can't even recognise

I wonder if this person had other issues, though, and this was not the reason she ended up in an institution.

NDRU said:

ZombieKitten said:

and I guess the second time around was out of guilt about the first time around I really have no reason why they so strongly rejected her the second time! It nearly killed my friend. Last I heard she was a reclusive, medicated, swollen person I can't even recognise

I wonder if this person had other issues, though, and this was not the reason she ended up in an institution.

well look at her biological family - FUCKED UP!

ZombieKitten said:

NDRU said:

I wonder if this person had other issues, though, and this was not the reason she ended up in an institution.

well look at her biological family - FUCKED UP!

that's why I say if you want to find your parents go for it. Don't worry about going crazy, unless you should be worrying about it already for other reasons.

TotalANXiousNESS said:

You used a double negative in your title.

That's improper English.

She didn't not use proper English?

p.s.

I care not for Oprah's newly discovered sister nor judge Oprah's mother for being a country- bumpkin- tramp.

Oprah's Sister -- My Old Wisconsin Home

This house in Wisconsin belongs to Oprah Winfrey's half-sister ... TMZ has learned -- but now that O knows she exists, it probably won't be Oprah's sister's house for long!!



O's half-sis Patricia -- who just met Winfrey for the first time back in November -- lives in this 1,070 sq. foot house in Milwaukee ... that includes 4 bedrooms and only 1 bathroom.



According to Zillow.com -- the estimated value of the house is somewhere around $55,500 ... which Oprah could probably find in her couch cushions.

So we gotta ask ...

Will Oprah upgrade Pat?

• 83%Yes
• 17%No

Total Votes: 6,421

http://www.tmz.com/2011/0...e-picture/

NDRU said:

ZombieKitten said:

well look at her biological family - FUCKED UP!

that's why I say if you want to find your parents go for it. Don't worry about going crazy, unless you should be worrying about it already for other reasons.

but Andy, she didn't know she was certified mental until she found out it runs in the family

ZombieKitten said:

NDRU said:

that's why I say if you want to find your parents go for it. Don't worry about going crazy, unless you should be worrying about it already for other reasons.

but Andy, she didn't know she was certified mental until she found out it runs in the family

but it would have happened anyway

NDRU said:

ZombieKitten said:

but Andy, she didn't know she was certified mental until she found out it runs in the family

but it would have happened anyway

I don't think it would have. It was the straw that broke her back.

Perhaps an equally traumatic experience down the track would have done it, but I don't think much is as bad as being rejected by your own parents.

ZombieKitten said:

NDRU said:

but it would have happened anyway

I don't think it would have. It was the straw that broke her back.

Perhaps an equally traumatic experience down the track would have done it, but I don't think much is as bad as being rejected by your own parents.

maybe, we can really only speculate. I don't think it means you should not take the chance if you want to find your birth parents. But yeah you take risks when you open yourself to stuff

NDRU said:

ZombieKitten said:

I don't think it would have. It was the straw that broke her back.

Perhaps an equally traumatic experience down the track would have done it, but I don't think much is as bad as being rejected by your own parents.

maybe, we can really only speculate. I don't think it means you should not take the chance if you want to find your birth parents. But yeah you take risks when you open yourself to stuff

it's a can of worms for sure

musicjunky318 said:

Oprah's Sister -- My Old Wisconsin Home

This house in Wisconsin belongs to Oprah Winfrey's half-sister ... TMZ has learned -- but now that O knows she exists, it probably won't be Oprah's sister's house for long!!



O's half-sis Patricia -- who just met Winfrey for the first time back in November -- lives in this 1,070 sq. foot house in Milwaukee ... that includes 4 bedrooms and only 1 bathroom.



According to Zillow.com -- the estimated value of the house is somewhere around $55,500 ... which Oprah could probably find in her couch cushions.

So we gotta ask ...

Will Oprah upgrade Pat?

• 83%Yes
• 17%No

Total Votes: 6,421

http://www.tmz.com/2011/0...e-picture/

Okay. Its nice if your rich sibling helps you out but it bothers me when it is automatically assumed that one is obligated to do so. It would be nice tho.

ZombieKitten said:

NDRU said:

there's always that chance, I know someone who found her dad and he did not really want to see her, but she found out she had a brother, and I don't think she regretted it. Also, it was not that surprising since the father had already left her life once.

I'm pretty sure $400 is worth it to answer life's questions like that one. The wondering is the hardest part.

I have a friend who knew all her life she was adopted.

When she was 18 she tracked down her birth mother. Turns out she married her birth father and had 2 more kids - blow number one, she was excluded from the "family"

then her mother and one of the brothers wanted nothing to do with her (blow number 2) father would have but mother talked him out of it

she started seeing the other brother but he turned out to be a flake that never answered her calls

blow number 3

I'm not saying don't do it, just that nothing will be what you dreamed, and can end in HORRIBLE heartache - for my friend, this was last straw, to be DOUBLE rejected by your family, she ended up clinically depressed and in and out of psychiatric hospital

i feel sorry for your friend, but i'm wondering why 1) she would expect these total strangers to welcome her and 2) why didn't she think of the family who raised her as 'family'?

speaking from the opposite end of it, i sort of have a similar situation. my father had an affair and sired two children outside his marriage to my mother. one of the kids from this marriage feels 'rejected' b/c i haven't behaved toward her the way she thinks i should as a sister. well, i can't.

one, i have seen her maybe five times over the course of my life. i have no connection to her apart from one drop of sperm. she's never every been a part of my life. i never think about her, never feel that i'm missing something, never feel that i should be trying to get to know her, nothing. i never remotely think of myself having a sister, and don't feel compelled in anyway to have anything other than a pleasant association with her - she sometimes comes to family get togethers. i've never been mean to her, i've never talked badly about her to the family or anyone else. the situation is what it is, but i have no desire to pretend its anything more than that. while she certainly isn't to blame for the circumstances of her birth, i can't ignore the reality of it. embracing her means embracing the betrayal of my mother and ultimately me and my brother by our father. i don't wish her or her mother any ill will, but certainly don't feel compelled to bring her into my life, bringing up *my pain* not to mention that of my mother. i have no idea why this woman feels 'rejected' as my sister when i have never ever been her sister in any way except on paper. i find it incredulous that a person can have these over the top emotions about someone who's never been a part of their life. i would understand if she had these feelings of rejection about our father, but me? that's silly, in my estimation.

i see your friend as the being the same. did your friend ever stop to think that she was intruding on her birth families' lives? dredging up painful memories for them? what about their rights to move on with their lives? and considering her adopted family is her *family* in every measurable sense that matters, why did she reject them? it might sound cold, but her birth mother is entitled to her feelings. you say her "parents" rejected her? no, they didn't because those people aren't her parents. a woman gave birth to her, put her up for adoption and she was raised by two people who put a roof over her head, food in her stomach, provided emotional support and comfort - in other words, HER PARENTS - and it is your friend who rejected them.

kibbles said:

ZombieKitten said:

I have a friend who knew all her life she was adopted.

When she was 18 she tracked down her birth mother. Turns out she married her birth father and had 2 more kids - blow number one, she was excluded from the "family"

then her mother and one of the brothers wanted nothing to do with her (blow number 2) father would have but mother talked him out of it

she started seeing the other brother but he turned out to be a flake that never answered her calls

blow number 3

I'm not saying don't do it, just that nothing will be what you dreamed, and can end in HORRIBLE heartache - for my friend, this was last straw, to be DOUBLE rejected by your family, she ended up clinically depressed and in and out of psychiatric hospital

i feel sorry for your friend, but i'm wondering why 1) she would expect these total strangers to welcome her and 2) why didn't she think of the family who raised her as 'family'?

speaking from the opposite end of it, i sort of have a similar situation. my father had an affair and sired two children outside his marriage to my mother. one of the kids from this marriage feels 'rejected' b/c i haven't behaved toward her the way she thinks i should as a sister. well, i can't.

one, i have seen her maybe five times over the course of my life. i have no connection to her apart from one drop of sperm. she's never every been a part of my life. i never think about her, never feel that i'm missing something, never feel that i should be trying to get to know her, nothing. i never remotely think of myself having a sister, and don't feel compelled in anyway to have anything other than a pleasant association with her - she sometimes comes to family get togethers. i've never been mean to her, i've never talked badly about her to the family or anyone else. the situation is what it is, but i have no desire to pretend its anything more than that. while she certainly isn't to blame for the circumstances of her birth, i can't ignore the reality of it. embracing her means embracing the betrayal of my mother and ultimately me and my brother by our father. i don't wish her or her mother any ill will, but certainly don't feel compelled to bring her into my life, bringing up *my pain* not to mention that of my mother. i have no idea why this woman feels 'rejected' as my sister when i have never ever been her sister in any way except on paper. i find it incredulous that a person can have these over the top emotions about someone who's never been a part of their life. i would understand if she had these feelings of rejection about our father, but me? that's silly, in my estimation.

i see your friend as the being the same. did your friend ever stop to think that she was intruding on her birth families' lives? dredging up painful memories for them? what about their rights to move on with their lives? and considering her adopted family is her *family* in every measurable sense that matters, why did she reject them? it might sound cold, but her birth mother is entitled to her feelings. you say her "parents" rejected her? no, they didn't because those people aren't her parents. a woman gave birth to her, put her up for adoption and she was raised by two people who put a roof over her head, food in her stomach, provided emotional support and comfort - in other words, HER PARENTS - and it is your friend who rejected them.

She never rejected her adopted family - did I say that? they are the ones who STILL look after her now, even in their advanced age. Or perhaps you mean that just by looking for them she rejects her adoptive parents? She was raised knowing she was adopted and that once she turned 18 she was encouraged to contact her birth parents.

As far as her feelings - yes, I see your side, you have no connection. Your fathers sordid extra-marital activities leave a distaste in your mouth that can't help but colour your emotions towards the children that resulted, who in your opinion have no place in your life!

My friend's birth parents are still together and her brothers are not half but full siblings. I think that is a big difference to unwanted children of affairs that family is complete, but for the missing eldest sister.

I am not adopted, and I would love an adopted orger throw their 2 cents here. I would imagine a lifetime of fantasy and yearning culminates in a meeting that will NEVER live up to expectations, only disappointment and hurt, as far as I see in the majority of cases.

What added insult to injury to my friend's experience, is that her sister, also adopted, met her birth mother at around the same time, and she was greeted with open arms and those two meet regularly. That birth mother knitted sweaters for both girls, even though my friend was not her daughter nor any relation but her birth daughter's adopted sister.