There's something I've noticed as I get older...

It seems like whenever someone is ailing or dying from something, the first thing people do it - be it famous or not - is try to cover it up or deny they're sick or dying, often saying things like "it's better now" or "I'm doing well".

It's usually just a cover up and I've noticed this stubbornness for quite some time. Maybe it's because people have been used to dealing with pain that even something major like the "Big C" or something like that is nothing.

True people do die from natural causes than they do from the illness that ails them. But if you notice after a person collapses or gets a stroke, they still find a way to cover it up as if it's not a problem when it's visual to the people they're close to.

Is it stubbornness to you or is it that they just want to put a positive spin on it? Your thoughts?

[Edited 1/7/11 21:34pm]

Timmy84 said:

There's something I've noticed as I get older...

It seems like whenever someone is ailing or dying from something, the first thing people do it - be it famous or not - is try to cover it up or deny they're sick or dying, often saying things like "it's better now" or "I'm doing well".

It's usually just a cover up and I've noticed this stubbornness for quite some time. Maybe it's because people have been used to dealing with pain that even something major like the "Big C" or something like that is nothing.

True people do die from natural causes than they do from the illness that ails them. But if you notice after a person collapses or gets a stroke, they still find a way to cover it up as if it's not a problem when it's visual to the people they're close to.

I don't wanna bring up the famous musician who right now is being very stubborn about her illness but I've noticed that lately.

Is it stubbornness to you or is it that they just want to put a positive spin on it? Your thoughts?

Maybe they want people out of their fucking business.

Timmy84 said:

There's something I've noticed as I get older...

It seems like whenever someone is ailing or dying from something, the first thing people do it - be it famous or not - is try to cover it up or deny they're sick or dying, often saying things like "it's better now" or "I'm doing well".

It's usually just a cover up and I've noticed this stubbornness for quite some time. Maybe it's because people have been used to dealing with pain that even something major like the "Big C" or something like that is nothing.

True people do die from natural causes than they do from the illness that ails them. But if you notice after a person collapses or gets a stroke, they still find a way to cover it up as if it's not a problem when it's visual to the people they're close to.

I don't wanna bring up the famous musician who right now is being very stubborn about her illness but I've noticed that lately.

Is it stubbornness to you or is it that they just want to put a positive spin on it? Your thoughts?

PunkMistress said:

Timmy84 said:

There's something I've noticed as I get older...

It seems like whenever someone is ailing or dying from something, the first thing people do it - be it famous or not - is try to cover it up or deny they're sick or dying, often saying things like "it's better now" or "I'm doing well".

It's usually just a cover up and I've noticed this stubbornness for quite some time. Maybe it's because people have been used to dealing with pain that even something major like the "Big C" or something like that is nothing.

True people do die from natural causes than they do from the illness that ails them. But if you notice after a person collapses or gets a stroke, they still find a way to cover it up as if it's not a problem when it's visual to the people they're close to.

I don't wanna bring up the famous musician who right now is being very stubborn about her illness but I've noticed that lately.

Is it stubbornness to you or is it that they just want to put a positive spin on it? Your thoughts?

Maybe they want people out of their fucking business.

That's what I thought too.

My mom was in the hospital a couple of months ago.... She had to have her gall bladder removed. No big deal, people get them out all the time, right?

I found her after I got off work one day, in so much pain she couldn't get out of bed. I rushed her to the hospital, and after a bunch of tests, they found the problem.

It was so bad that GANGRENE had set in. The doctor said if I hadn't bullied her into going, she would have died in that bed.

They also found a host of other issues...

Well... she was walking around in pain for a WHILE and didn't want to miss work, didn't want to "bother anybody", didn't want to admit that she needed to sit her ass down and deal with the pain...

My Mom falls into the category of people who thinks illness make you look weak.

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

[Edited 1/7/11 13:54pm]

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

As if owing up to what is ailing them is bad for them ego-wise. It's usually with independent folks who had no problem showing you they can take care of themselves that if there's something they ail them, that's what they usually do is deny to the public they need any help when in private, help is what they really need especially if they can't do simple things anymore.

Timmy84 said:

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

As if owing up to what is ailing them is bad for them ego-wise. It's usually with independent folks who had no problem showing you they can take care of themselves that if there's something they ail them, that's what they usually do is deny to the public they need any help when in private, help is what they really need especially if they can't do simple things anymore.

My mom...

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

With regard to this, I know several people who've taken ill and insisted -- some up to their very death -- on not "claiming" their sickness. Most have been outwardly very religious. They seem to think that by not confessing to the world they have, say, cancer or AIDS -- even when it is incontrovertible and well known among loved ones -- God will honor that denial and miraculously take the illness away.

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

[Edited 1/7/11 13:54pm]

Ouch. This hits home.

they can react however they like, i don't really care anyway.

Lammastide said:

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

With regard to this, I know several people who've taken ill and insisted -- some up to their very death -- on not "claiming" their sickness. Most have been outwardly very religious. They seem to think that by not confessing to the world they have, say, cancer or AIDS -- even when it is incontrovertible and well known among loved ones -- God will honor that denial and miraculously take the illness away.

Lots of folks usually will bring God up when you ask about their illness. They ALL say the same thing: "God is going to bring me through this."

PunkMistress said:

Lammastide said:

A lot of things contribute to this. I do think often ailing folk simply don't want you in their business. But I also think it has to do with thinking being in need of others' care is undignified or a show of character weakness. Also, some people simply don't want to publicly "own" their illness, because to do so, they think, is to somehow submit to its ravages.

[Edited 1/7/11 13:54pm]

Ouch. This hits home.

I pass no judgement here, BTW. I'm the very same way with my own crap.

Timmy84 said:

PunkMistress said:

Maybe they want people out of their fucking business.

That's what I thought too.

I love what Aretha said about her health. It's between me and my Doctor. Some people will talk about anything, that's not me.

She told people if they feel like somethings wrong, get it checked.

Then she thanked her fans.

Nothing stubborn about it.

Fear.

Acknowledgement of sickness and possible surgery (the surgical procedures, possible removal of organs or body parts) is what would drive people to ignore conditions.

Like ignoring a lump in a breast for example.

paintedlady said:

Fear.

Acknowledgement of sickness and possible surgery (the surgical procedures, possible removal of organs or body parts) is what would drive people to ignore conditions.

Like ignoring a lump in a breast for example.

mynameisnotsusan said:

Timmy84 said:

That's what I thought too.

I love what Aretha said about her health. It's between me and my Doctor. Some people will talk about anything, that's not me.

She told people if they feel like somethings wrong, get it checked.

Then she thanked her fans.

Nothing stubborn about it.

Oh I didn't get that from Aretha, that's why I posted this as a question.

With Aretha, I don't count it being stubborn (though I can understand how some may see it that way), I count it on her being a faithful woman (since childhood after she was baptized in her father's church).

With others though, I could see some being stubborn about it.

Have to correct myself... I meant it as a question, sometimes I write things without thinking but anyway, carry on lol