mimi02 said:

CarrieMpls said:

Dating a bisexual man is one thing, dating a man who wants you to watch him “get off” with another man is another thing entirely.

If I were single and met a man I was attracted to, his being bisexual would not put him out of the running for a date.

As for the other part, I would not date any man who wants to sleep with other people (men or women), let alone have me be present to watch.

Agree with CarrieMpls.

Also, I don't have a problem with anyone's sexuality as long as they respect mine's.

In fact, I'd rather hang-out with a bisexual or gay male, because they're going to let you know the deal-straight-up. I guess the term is "fag-hag".

What is it about gay and bi men makes you think they're more likely to "let you know the deal straight up"?

PunkMistress said:

mimi02 said:

Agree with CarrieMpls.

Also, I don't have a problem with anyone's sexuality as long as they respect mine's.

In fact, I'd rather hang-out with a bisexual or gay male, because they're going to let you know the deal-straight-up. I guess the term is "fag-hag".

What is it about gay and bi men makes you think they're more likely to "let you know the deal straight up"?

I'm referring to my best friend which is a gay male.

mimi02 said:

PunkMistress said:

What is it about gay and bi men makes you think they're more likely to "let you know the deal straight up"?

I'm referring to my best friend which is a gay male.

Oh, OK.

The way you worded your post made it sound as if you were referring to queer men as a whole.

only if he has great tits

ScarletScandal said:

PositivityNYC said:

man became female, but only dates women... ?

From my understanding, it's a man who transitioned to a woman, but still has a penis and fucks chicks, but not as a man, but as a...woman?

So what does that make the person GETTING fucked

So much to respond to and so little time. In the 1990's I worked at a club in Atlanta that did drag shows (backstreet) I worked the door. All of the chicks with dicks that dated people with a pussy were dating butch lesbians, straight up bulldaggers etc. I did not see one that had a feminine looking pussy owning lover.

This brings me to my next subject which is trade. Trade to me is always under 30 years old and is willing to supply sexual favors for a place to stay, or use of your car, or a few drinks and some recreational drugs perhaps.

This is NOT who I am talking about!!!!!

I am a near 50 female who is not going to go into clubs looking for skanky ass men to give me dick and then bitch about the fact that they are skanky ass men later.

when I say bisexual man, I mean over 30, too old to be called a boy/man and should know his sexual preferences and hopefully have a trade that he can support himself with besides the sex trade.

I mean the type of mand that has taken in up the arse and down the throat and knows that he likes it every bit as much as he likes pussy.

when i said honest, that is just what I mean. I man that can tell me that he likes what he likes and truly he is maybe capable of giving up the dick for a while but sooner or later he is going ot want some again. Truth. Truthful.

PunkMistress said:

CarrieMpls said:

bisexual does not = non-monogamous

Can we be clear about that here?

Bisexual simply means they'll date both men and women - not that they MUST date both at the same time.

Thank you!

The original post assumes that my marriage is full of three-ways and Chris watching me fuck girls.

I fuck Chris. That's all. I still love women and will always be attracted to and fantasize about them, but I don't touch anyone except him.

I respect this.

However, no disrespect to you or Vendetta1 but we are talking men here.

Maybe a bisexual female can enter into a relationship with a man and swear off pussy for life and succeed. manbe she can enter a relationship with a female and never have dick again. I am not so sure that a man can succeed as well. I am being honest here. Monogamy is easier for females period. Whether we like that fact or not. Maybe it is part of evolution I don't know. All I know is that you won't see any show called "brother/husbands" soon. You don't see men sharing one lover with another man unless perhaps they are doing that man also. Women can not only accept monogomy they can be monogamous to a man that is openly polygamous.

Men don't do that.

We are different because of our gender.

Shemales,despite all their flaming have certain domineering ways that mark them as male that I wish I could describe better. They are not "just like women" even if they wear heels and make-up etc. To me heels and make-up don't make you a woman. They show that your someone who likes feminine things and dressing up.

ZombieKitten said:

PositivityNYC said:

an ex of mine would sometimes ask if I'd do a threesome; him, me & another girl (he had had one once with a friend and her sister [which I thought was just gross... sex while a sibling watches/helps out??])... and I'd always say no....

one day I decided to mess with him and I said "Sure..."

he got all

then I said, "and next time, it's me, you and a guy of my choosing...."

him:

he never asked again..

he was such a phobe... -- lesbians were ok [he had that stupid porn fantasy stuck in his head], but gay guys?? [soooo glad that one ended! ]

[Edited 12/29/10 8:18am]

guys are such guys

I am talking about one woman and a guy that would most certainly love for you to pick out a sexy guy for the three of you to play. You could be the pig and they could poke you in 2 places at the same time. I am also talking about a guy that would love to take it up the arse from the man you choose as much as you just might.

ZombieKitten you have good taste in men, why wouldn't a BISEXUAL guy let you pick out the third person?

The bisexual men that I have talked to deffinately fantasize about having either a man and a woman in bed with them or a woman and a shemale, or a man and a shemale. They may not see these fantasies fulfilled, but they have them.

paintedlady said:

I don't care about his past as long as it stays in the past and he is loyal to me.

Maturity is what it is, either you are ready for ONE lover to grow with or you are not. All men have dicks and all desire is the same. So as long as he only plans on putting his dick in me only, its all good.

Again, I am thinking of the movie de-lovely here. The marriage lasted but she came to make peace with the fact that there was a part of him that her relationship with him could not fulfill. Yet at the same time he still wanted to be with her.

JustErin said:

chocolate1 said:

I have had a lot of trouble with finding a hetero guy who wants to be with just me.

I'm not interested in expanding the playing field to include TWO SEXES to be dumped for. The competition has been rough enough against other women.

Yeah, this is my thinking too.

I see no reason to put up with other women. I am talking about a man who would not leave me for a man but a man who just may have a friend with benifits. I am not talking about a man who is gay and just hasn't come to terms with that yet; then once he figures it out he leaves me for a man - like Toni Morrison's husband left her. There is such a thing as a bisexual man.

Deadflow3r said:

O.K. we all know that guys just love it when a woman is bisexual and is willing to do it with another girl while they watch. Many a man has expressed envy for JerseyKRS purrfect marriage. However, what if the shoe was on the other foot. What if the woman is straight and the man is bi and he wants her to watch him get off with another man? Would you do it ? Would you enjoy it?

thread title question and questions in the post don't always go hand-in-hand though... I would presume.....

Even though I agree with the earlier sentiment (we girls already have enough 'competition' with just our own gender, LOL), I guess I'd date a bi guy ~ I figure if he's interested in me, he's interested in me..

but, I would think you'd have to have a "let's have an open relationship" talk before bringing other ppl into the bedroom or wherever it is you do the do...

-- I've never had one of those (open relationship; we are together, but occasionally a) one or both of us will screw other ppl on the side and/or b) we do threesomes and send the 3rd person home when we're done with them) so I don't really know what the protocols are, lol, but ..... either way, I'm not sure I could watch my boyfriend have sex with some strange guy -- or girl -- and enjoy it....

is that selfish..? I'm the oldest kid of 5... ppl were always making me share when I was a kid... I guess it comes from that "trauma"

~ I guess sharing wasn't really the problem -- it's that when I got my toy back, it was damaged/broken/ruined... and don'cha just hate it when guys are damaged/broken/ruined...?

Deadflow3r said:

paintedlady said:

I don't care about his past as long as it stays in the past and he is loyal to me.

Maturity is what it is, either you are ready for ONE lover to grow with or you are not. All men have dicks and all desire is the same. So as long as he only plans on putting his dick in me only, its all good.

Again, I am thinking of the movie de-lovely here. The marriage lasted but she came to make peace with the fact that there was a part of him that her relationship with him could not fulfill. Yet at the same time he still wanted to be with her.

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

Again, I am thinking of the movie de-lovely here. The marriage lasted but she came to make peace with the fact that there was a part of him that her relationship with him could not fulfill. Yet at the same time he still wanted to be with her.

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

yeah.. I don't see monogamy as "hard" -- not sure tho if that's 'cause I'm a girl, lol, but... I never understood why it seems to be so hard for [some] [many?] men...

Makes me wonder if there are any "open relationships" that actually work...

* relationships; not the 'casual dating' thing...

Deadflow3r said:

ZombieKitten said:

guys are such guys

I am talking about one woman and a guy that would most certainly love for you to pick out a sexy guy for the three of you to play. You could be the pig and they could poke you in 2 places at the same time. I am also talking about a guy that would love to take it up the arse from the man you choose as much as you just might.

ZombieKitten you have good taste in men, why wouldn't a BISEXUAL guy let you pick out the third person?

The bisexual men that I have talked to deffinately fantasize about having either a man and a woman in bed with them or a woman and a shemale, or a man and a shemale. They may not see these fantasies fulfilled, but they have them.

I don't think that particualr scenario counts... esp if guy # 2 doesn't do anything with guy #1 (the bi bf)

and if guy #2 is straight, what are the chances he'd even partake in a threesome where guy #1 is bi?

[Edited 1/4/11 12:01pm]

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

Again, I am thinking of the movie de-lovely here. The marriage lasted but she came to make peace with the fact that there was a part of him that her relationship with him could not fulfill. Yet at the same time he still wanted to be with her.

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

If a any man expects me to keep myself for him only, I expect the smae of him.

The past is the past, like I said, and ain't NO man on this earth got what I got so other men don't intimidate me... heck I am special and if he doesn't see it, then he's with the wrong person.

Now if a man tells me that I can't give him what he requires, he needs to move the fuck on and leave me alone to find another that I can be happy with. No man will blame me for his misery, I will not allow it.

In GP at this point in my life, it'll be a no, in my 30s I'd of considered it, but not now. He'd have to be something spectacular that makes me feel spectacular to even make me wanna put in the work and time. I agree with chocolate.

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

Again, I am thinking of the movie de-lovely here. The marriage lasted but she came to make peace with the fact that there was a part of him that her relationship with him could not fulfill. Yet at the same time he still wanted to be with her.

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

Exactly when did Cole Porter become a fictional character.

Had you simply googled Delovely/Movie you would have found out that it was about a very real person and his complicated marriage. His ongoing relationships with men did strain the marriage and she did leave him for a time. However their love for one another was undeniable and infidelity did not change that.

There are many examples of open marriages that contain life long love and also plenty of monogomous marriages that have lost their love long ago. As I said I am nearing 50 and those black and white answers of " if he loves you he won't cheat on you" are not working for me any longer. I think love is complicated and sex is too.

morningsong said:

In GP at this point in my life, it'll be a no, in my 30s I'd of considered it, but not now. He'd have to be something spectacular that makes me feel spectacular to even make me wanna put in the work and time. I agree with chocolate.

Ironically I am just the opposite. In my 30's I would have never considered it. Now that I am nearing 50 I am looking at things very differently.

PositivityNYC said:

Deadflow3r said:

I am talking about one woman and a guy that would most certainly love for you to pick out a sexy guy for the three of you to play. You could be the pig and they could poke you in 2 places at the same time. I am also talking about a guy that would love to take it up the arse from the man you choose as much as you just might.

ZombieKitten you have good taste in men, why wouldn't a BISEXUAL guy let you pick out the third person?

The bisexual men that I have talked to deffinately fantasize about having either a man and a woman in bed with them or a woman and a shemale, or a man and a shemale. They may not see these fantasies fulfilled, but they have them.

I don't think that particualr scenario counts... esp if guy # 2 doesn't do anything with guy #1 (the bi bf)

and if guy #2 is straight, what are the chances he'd even partake in a threesome where guy #1 is bi?

[Edited 1/4/11 12:01pm]

I guess it could be two straight men, but as ZombieKitten stories proove - two straight men are not that interested in sharing the same woman. To a straight man threesome means two women and him or forget it (most of the time).

PositivityNYC said:

Deadflow3r said:

O.K. we all know that guys just love it when a woman is bisexual and is willing to do it with another girl while they watch. Many a man has expressed envy for JerseyKRS purrfect marriage. However, what if the shoe was on the other foot. What if the woman is straight and the man is bi and he wants her to watch him get off with another man? Would you do it ? Would you enjoy it?

thread title question and questions in the post don't always go hand-in-hand though... I would presume.....

Even though I agree with the earlier sentiment (we girls already have enough 'competition' with just our own gender, LOL), I guess I'd date a bi guy ~ I figure if he's interested in me, he's interested in me..

but, I would think you'd have to have a "let's have an open relationship" talk before bringing other ppl into the bedroom or wherever it is you do the do...

-- I've never had one of those (open relationship; we are together, but occasionally a) one or both of us will screw other ppl on the side and/or b) we do threesomes and send the 3rd person home when we're done with them) so I don't really know what the protocols are, lol, but ..... either way, I'm not sure I could watch my boyfriend have sex with some strange guy -- or girl -- and enjoy it....

is that selfish..? I'm the oldest kid of 5... ppl were always making me share when I was a kid... I guess it comes from that "trauma"

~ I guess sharing wasn't really the problem -- it's that when I got my toy back, it was damaged/broken/ruined... and don'cha just hate it when guys are damaged/broken/ruined...?

At least your feeling me. So far your the only one.

I am saying all of this because the # of available men for a 50 year old woman is not great. At the same time the desire to enter a relationship full of drama and secrets is none at all. I would want this to be VERY OPEN AND HONEST. I am too old for the bull shit. If a man will tell me the truth we can work with that. I also do not want to be someones dirty little secret.

I don't need to be in 3 somes, ever. It would be a nice thing to do once before I croak but I don't absolutely have to do it. I am absolutely hating celibacy and have no desire to continue on this way any longer. I hate it and I am looking for alternatives that are possible for a 50 year old woman. Period.

paintedlady said:

CarrieMpls said:

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

If a any man expects me to keep myself for him only, I expect the smae of him.

The past is the past, like I said, and ain't NO man on this earth got what I got so other men don't intimidate me... heck I am special and if he doesn't see it, then he's with the wrong person.

Now if a man tells me that I can't give him what he requires, he needs to move the fuck on and leave me alone to find another that I can be happy with. No man will blame me for his misery, I will not allow it.

Well you are getting laid my friend and that is all good, but I am not and something is going to be done about this problem of mine. Period.

Deadflow3r said:

PunkMistress said:

Thank you!

The original post assumes that my marriage is full of three-ways and Chris watching me fuck girls.

I fuck Chris. That's all. I still love women and will always be attracted to and fantasize about them, but I don't touch anyone except him.

I respect this.

However, no disrespect to you or Vendetta1 but we are talking men here.

Maybe a bisexual female can enter into a relationship with a man and swear off pussy for life and succeed. manbe she can enter a relationship with a female and never have dick again. I am not so sure that a man can succeed as well. I am being honest here. Monogamy is easier for females period. Whether we like that fact or not. Maybe it is part of evolution I don't know. All I know is that you won't see any show called "brother/husbands" soon. You don't see men sharing one lover with another man unless perhaps they are doing that man also. Women can not only accept monogomy they can be monogamous to a man that is openly polygamous.

Men don't do that.

We are different because of our gender.

Shemales,despite all their flaming have certain domineering ways that mark them as male that I wish I could describe better. They are not "just like women" even if they wear heels and make-up etc. To me heels and make-up don't make you a woman. They show that your someone who likes feminine things and dressing up.

I'll have to respectfully disagree with you here. Biology -- and perhaps a culture that assumes biological creatures is all we are -- may make it somewhat more of a challenge for men to do this. But I know from experience that it can happen successfully -- and it's not particularly torturous or given to some resignation that one party or the other will be left unfulfilled.

As Carrie suggests, it's not altogether without work. But while I'd hardly prescribe this scenario for just anyone, I've personally found some things are worth the work.

I think even open relationships take work. All relationships take work for the two people to stay connected and not just live together in seperate worlds. I use to be one of those that believed that if a man cheats on you - leave him. Well I don't like lying and rather than encourage that I would rather stay open to things being a bit unconventional.

At nearly 50 I am looking at what do I need in my life verses what do I want or prefer. I need people that give a shit about me and my daughter. Monogamous doesn't necessarily mean that. My father never cheated on my mother but he was a horrible choice for the husband and father role.

Maybe I should not have mentioned threesomes because it was more in playfulness and not what I have my heart set on.

What I have my heart set on is someone that cares about me, that I care about and respect and that will be a part of my life for a long while. If he is a part of someone elses life aswell, it may not mean that he does not care about me.

Deadflow3r said:

CarrieMpls said:

That’s all well and good for a fictional character in a movie (that I haven’t seen) but I could never make peace with that. If you want to be with me, you don’t get to be with others too. It’s a choice.

And I don’t care whether monogamy is “easy” or “natural”. It’s not “easy” or “natural” for me to be thin, but I still work at it. It’s not “easy” or “natural” to do a lot of things in life, but they are still expected of us, and rightly so.

Now, if you have a fetish for men who do other men there's nothing wrong with that.

But if not, then it's not a "sacrifice" or compromise a person should have to make in a relationship.

Exactly when did Cole Porter become a fictional character.

Had you simply googled Delovely/Movie you would have found out that it was about a very real person and his complicated marriage. His ongoing relationships with men did strain the marriage and she did leave him for a time. However their love for one another was undeniable and infidelity did not change that.

There are many examples of open marriages that contain life long love and also plenty of monogomous marriages that have lost their love long ago. As I said I am nearing 50 and those black and white answers of " if he loves you he won't cheat on you" are not working for me any longer. I think love is complicated and sex is too.

I agree that just because a man cheats doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. Love and sex are two different things. And if folks want to have an open relationship, that’s fine for them, but that doesn’t sound like what you were describing above. It’s not “cheating” if it’s an open relationship. And I find it horribly sad that a woman would clearly be hurt by actions such as were described and finally accept something like that so as to not lose a partner. I would rather find someone who meets my needs and respects my partnership. Love is one thing, a successful and healthy relationship is another. I’d rather be alone than with someone who disrespects me like that.

Again, don’t know the specific story, only know from what you've typed I find it terribly sad.

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

Exactly when did Cole Porter become a fictional character.

Had you simply googled Delovely/Movie you would have found out that it was about a very real person and his complicated marriage. His ongoing relationships with men did strain the marriage and she did leave him for a time. However their love for one another was undeniable and infidelity did not change that.

There are many examples of open marriages that contain life long love and also plenty of monogomous marriages that have lost their love long ago. As I said I am nearing 50 and those black and white answers of " if he loves you he won't cheat on you" are not working for me any longer. I think love is complicated and sex is too.

I agree that just because a man cheats doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. Love and sex are two different things. And if folks want to have an open relationship, that’s fine for them, but that doesn’t sound like what you were describing above. It’s not “cheating” if it’s an open relationship. And I find it horribly sad that a woman would clearly be hurt by actions such as were described and finally accept something like that so as to not lose a partner. I would rather find someone who meets my needs and respects my partnership. Love is one thing, a successful and healthy relationship is another. I’d rather be alone than with someone who disrespects me like that.

Again, don’t know the specific story, only know from what you've typed I find it terribly sad.

Carrie, she walked into the relationship KNOWING ABOUT THE MEN.

Second, because of his fame, there were people trying to out him. If it is not acceptable now you can imagine what it was like half a century or more ago to be with a man who also was with men.

He did love and respect her.

She left him because after a while she could not do it any longer.

he ended up in a horrible riding accident which brought them back together.

They realized in the end just how much they loved one another.

She ended up dying first of emphasema and he was devastated.

It is a love story and it asks the question what is love. it is probably one of the few stories that looks at it honestly. It isn't pro or con but it doesn't put things in black or white terms. He had a great deal of love and respect for his wife.

Deadflow3r said:

I think even open relationships take work. All relationships take work for the two people to stay connected and not just live together in seperate worlds. I use to be one of those that believed that if a man cheats on you - leave him. Well I don't like lying and rather than encourage that I would rather stay open to things being a bit unconventional.

At nearly 50 I am looking at what do I need in my life verses what do I want or prefer. I need people that give a shit about me and my daughter. Monogamous doesn't necessarily mean that. My father never cheated on my mother but he was a horrible choice for the husband and father role.

Maybe I should not have mentioned threesomes because it was more in playfulness and not what I have my heart set on.

What I have my heart set on is someone that cares about me, that I care about and respect and that will be a part of my life for a long while. If he is a part of someone elses life aswell, it may not mean that he does not care about me.

If you want an open relationship, that’s OK. Especially if you want an open relationship where both you AND your man are going to be having some fun.

But I find it disheartening if you’re thinking about this as something you’re willing to settle for, rather than something you actually want. You’re worth a man’s undivided attention. If that’s what you want, there’s no reason you shouldn’t have that. That’s all.

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

I think even open relationships take work. All relationships take work for the two people to stay connected and not just live together in seperate worlds. I use to be one of those that believed that if a man cheats on you - leave him. Well I don't like lying and rather than encourage that I would rather stay open to things being a bit unconventional.

At nearly 50 I am looking at what do I need in my life verses what do I want or prefer. I need people that give a shit about me and my daughter. Monogamous doesn't necessarily mean that. My father never cheated on my mother but he was a horrible choice for the husband and father role.

Maybe I should not have mentioned threesomes because it was more in playfulness and not what I have my heart set on.

What I have my heart set on is someone that cares about me, that I care about and respect and that will be a part of my life for a long while. If he is a part of someone elses life aswell, it may not mean that he does not care about me.

If you want an open relationship, that’s OK. Especially if you want an open relationship where both you AND your man are going to be having some fun.

But I find it disheartening if you’re thinking about this as something you’re willing to settle for, rather than something you actually want. You’re worth a man’s undivided attention. If that’s what you want, there’s no reason you shouldn’t have that. That’s all.

Look I am nearing 5o and have not gotten dick in 9 years. Settling for being celibate for much longer is far mor disheartening to me. I am sick of waiting to be "the one". Women even older than I have it far worse. It sucks but it is my reality. Reality is there isn't enough decent dick to go around and old broads who haven't settled down before they are 50 are going to be left off of the playing field, whether they like it or not.

Deadflow3r, please help me to be clear: Are you saying you would date not only a bisexual man, but one whom you know to be sleeping with other women and/or men -- perhaps even despite your not liking this -- because you think at age 50 you can't find a more ideal partner?

I must openly admit that I am very ignorant about the adult dating scene. Is it truly that though out there?

[Edited 1/7/11 12:14pm]

Deadflow3r said:

CarrieMpls said:

If you want an open relationship, that’s OK. Especially if you want an open relationship where both you AND your man are going to be having some fun.

But I find it disheartening if you’re thinking about this as something you’re willing to settle for, rather than something you actually want. You’re worth a man’s undivided attention. If that’s what you want, there’s no reason you shouldn’t have that. That’s all.

Look I am nearing 5o and have not gotten dick in 9 years. Settling for being celibate for much longer is far mor disheartening to me. I am sick of waiting to be "the one". Women even older than I have it far worse. It sucks but it is my reality. Reality is there isn't enough decent dick to go around and old broads who haven't settled down before they are 50 are going to be left off of the playing field, whether they like it or not.

Well, I haven’t walked in your shoes, so I don’t know your experience. I only know my own, in which I’d rather be alone.

CarrieMpls said:

Deadflow3r said:

Look I am nearing 5o and have not gotten dick in 9 years. Settling for being celibate for much longer is far mor disheartening to me. I am sick of waiting to be "the one". Women even older than I have it far worse. It sucks but it is my reality. Reality is there isn't enough decent dick to go around and old broads who haven't settled down before they are 50 are going to be left off of the playing field, whether they like it or not.

Well, I haven’t walked in your shoes, so I don’t know your experience. I only know my own, in which I’d rather be alone.

Had I read your entry as late as 2008 or early 2009 I would agree with you completely. As strange as this sounds, I was studying with the Jehovah Witnesses and they are big on celibacy. Not only that Baptized members are strictly forbidden to date outside of their religion or face being disfellowshipped. I knew of plenty of celibate women that had yet to find the right Brother. I thought I could be among the celibate for life folks if I did not find my Mr Right.

Somehow, someway I began to realize how bullshit this is for older women. It totally does not work out in our favor. Not only that some women in their later years no longer want to be sexually active but are married to men that do. The marriage is often a good one except for this point of contention. It just gets quite complicated as you age. I no longer believe that God Prefers me to be celibate forever. I am just not buying it.

tinaz said:

Can we say my bi-sexual man is George Micheal??

Which shows you how that would work out because George is gay now. You don't ever see him running off anywhere for sex with women.