Had to post this, a friend posted it on their Facebook wall and it had me rolling with laughter.

Got any Craigslist wonders to share? Post 'em here!

WTF is a 'bedazzler' anyway?

________________________________________________

I'm a serious bro looking for a equally/more serious bro with fancy footwork. The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness. I would have done this way sooner but have little faith in humanity.

Requirements:
-access to an abandoned warehouse
-old enough/built kinda awesome
-maintains good eye contact
-general intensity
-cool moves
-shades
-leather jackets ( I had to give the one in the pic back - long story, I can tell you when we finish)
-Bedazzler
-basic knowledge of knife/sword/bat fight etiquette (I can teach you what I know if you are pretty serious about art like me)
-can lift 80 lbs
-bachelor's in something or equivalent experience
-not a narc

Whereas dudes/J-ing O are both undeniably awesome, I'm a straight bro. As in not gay. I just really love MJ and being open minded about new JO scenarios. We will basically play "Beat It" over and over again while we JO and dance, occasionally parrying/thrusting. Winner finishes the most times, but points will be awarded for finishing first/accuracy. If you're the heter-bro I'm looking for, then we can JO furiously/competitively and then just hang or whatever. I've got laser tag too. I'm pretty serious about this. As in completely serious. If you touch my junk with anything but your own I will BF you in the M. Nerds/gays need not apply. I'M NOT GAY.

P.S. - And I've gotten with hot chicks as recently as just now.

"They told him don't you ever come around here
Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear
The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear
So beat it, just beat it"

• Location: Philly
• it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 1755781713

leather jackets ( I had to give the one in the pic back - long story, I can tell you when we finish)

Xibalba said:

-bachelor's in something or equivalent experience

what major qualifies you for this mess?

Mike says

"Keep it in the closet...sha-mon"

hilarious.

Xibalba said:

I'm a serious bro looking for a equally/more serious bro with fancy footwork. The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness.
I'm a straight bro. As in not gay. I'M NOT GAY.

[img:$uid]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v194/outspoken34/b8l5rp.gif[/img:$uid]

The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness

Im a little naive, what is JO???

It isnt Jack Off is it?

see this is why i'm afraid of craigslist!

mostbeautifulboy said:

The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness

Im a little naive, what is JO???

It isnt Jack Off is it?

lol

I could see why you'd think that

no, no

it's jerk off

mostbeautifulboy said:

The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness

Im a little naive, what is JO???

It isnt Jack Off is it?

Don't know. Whatever it is, it's NOT GAY!

scorp84 said:

mostbeautifulboy said:

The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness

Im a little naive, what is JO???

It isnt Jack Off is it?

Don't know. Whatever it is, it's NOT GAY!

Xibalba said:

Had to post this, a friend posted it on their Facebook wall and it had me rolling with laughter.

Got any Craigslist wonders to share? Post 'em here!

WTF is a 'bedazzler' anyway?

________________________________________________

A bedazzler is a device that is used to stick little jewels onto clothing. I'm guessing the fellow wants to make a sparkly jacket or glove MJ-style! LOL

What the heck did I just read? He lost me at the warehouse. And my dirty old mind went right to a gay porn fantasy...

I saw a sketch on The Big Gay Sketch Show about those listings. This really silly dude is dressed up as Maya Angelou, reading off-beat postings. I watched on Youtube for about an hour, nearly choking on the tea I was drinking. Too funny!

NDRU said:

Xibalba said:

-bachelor's in something or equivalent experience

what major qualifies you for this mess?

I would answer your post if it made any sense.

Xibalba said:

NDRU said:

what major qualifies you for this mess?

I would answer your post if it made any sense.

they were asking for someone with a bachelor's degree. I was wondering what kind of degree (major) is best suited for a Beat It themed JO encounter

Whereas dudes/J-ing O are both undeniably awesome, I'm a straight bro. As in not gay. I just really love MJ and being open minded about new JO scenarios. We will basically play "Beat It" over and over again while we JO and dance, occasionally parrying/thrusting. Winner finishes the most times, but points will be awarded for finishing first/accuracy. If you're the heter-bro I'm looking for, then we can JO furiously/competitively and then just hang or whatever. I've got laser tag too. I'm pretty serious about this. As in completely serious. If you touch my junk with anything but your own I will BF you in the M. Nerds/gays need not apply. I'M NOT GAY.

[img:$uid]http://i33.tinypic.com/34fbn9s.jpg[/img:$uid]

Uh.............................................

mostbeautifulboy said:

The idea is to tie our wrists together ala the "Beat It" video and then each JO/knife fight in a profound spiritual act of consensual hetero awesomeness

Im a little naive, what is JO???

It isnt Jack Off is it?

He could've called it crossing swords. But yeah that's what he meant.

I would love to know the responses he got for this!

I'm still waiting for something to appear on youtube.

@consensual hetero awesomeness

mostbeautifulboy said:

I would love to know the responses he got for this!

I'm still waiting for something to appear on youtube.

@consensual hetero awesomeness

That boob would probably film himself naked except for the "Beat It jacket" and the MJ from HIStory hairdo and jack off to the song and put it on XTube or some shit and believe me it won't be girls who would be looking. He probably ain't nothing to brag about looking at him, like he's Jason Jackson's brother.

[Edited 12/13/10 19:50pm]