Meet Melissa Lee Williams. The West Virginia woman, 41, is facing assault and weapons charges after allegedly waving a knife at two men who declined her demands to engage in sexual conduct at a motor inn.

The October 22 incident is detailed in an amusing/gross Jackson County Sheriff’s Department report excerpted here.

According to investigators, Williams--who lives four doors down from her estranged husband at the 77 Motor Inn--showed up at his door and asked Danny Williams and another man to “eat my pussy.” At this point, Williams, pictured in the mug shot at right, “commenced to undress herself,” reported Deputy Ross Mellinger.

While Danny Williams “declined said invitation,” the other man, Adam Watson, told cops that he “agreed to perform at her request.” However, as Watson approached Williams, “he became overwhelmed by horrible vaginal odor emitting from Melissa Williams.” Watson, understandably, “declined to proceed any further.”

This is when Melissa Williams allegedly “produced a lock-back folding knife,” opened it, and pointed the weapon at her estranged husband. She then reportedly uttered a line never before memorialized in a police report: “Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

When Deputy Mellinger arrived on the scene he observed Williams--who, like the two men, appeared to be intoxicated--nude from the waist down. After pocketing a knife that was on the coffee table in front of Williams, Mellinger arrested her for domestic assault and brandishing a deadly weapon.

Williams, who was released from jail after posting $3000 bond, is next due in Jackson County Magistrate Court on February 16.

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The highlighted part nearly made me puke. I feel sorry for the poor fella who nearly ate this ugly looking hick's pussy. Yuukk!!

I would have said well okay but firts you need to blind me, cut off my nose, and cut out my tounge...

Very few things on this Earth cause me to have a gag reflex... but that red portion did. Ew.

Yep, I think lunch can wait another hour.

Yikes! :/

Poor dudes... I hope the woman gets the helps that she needs.... psychologically.

Asymphony5 said:

Yikes! :/

Poor dudes... I hope the woman gets the helps that she needs.... psychologically.

I'm not even sure a phychologist would go there!

Funkcreep said:

Asymphony5 said:

Yikes! :/

Poor dudes... I hope the woman gets the helps that she needs.... psychologically.

I'm not even sure a phychologist would go there!

Asymphony5 said:

Yikes! :/

Poor dudes... I hope the woman gets the helps that she needs.... psychologically.

first things first... a lil hygine would be on the top of my list.

Asymphony5 said:

Pr1nceQuik said:

“Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

This bitch would have had to cut my throat. File this under "a fate worse then death."

CuddlyBear said:

Pr1nceQuik said:

“Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

This bitch would have had to cut my throat. File this under "a fate worse then death."

I would've happily took that option too.

That funk from the pussy would've prolly put me off women....

....well actually, nothing will put me off women...but that would've traumatised me. She needs help ASAP. And ain't it a surprise she's an ugly, fat trailer park looking hick?

Pr1nceQuik said:

“Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

Shit, sometimes it be's like that.

SCNDLS said:

Pr1nceQuik said:

“Somebody is going to eat my pussy or I’m going to cut your fucking throat.”

Shit, sometimes it be's like that.

And sometimes all you need to do is ask. I'm always up for a little kitty chomp as long as it ain't fermented like Mrs. William's rancid cooch.

CuddlyBear said:

SCNDLS said:

Shit, sometimes it be's like that.

And sometimes all you need to do is ask. I'm always up for a little kitty chomp as long as it ain't fermented like Mrs. William's rancid cooch.

Like this? and

SCNDLS said:

CuddlyBear said:

And sometimes all you need to do is ask. I'm always up for a little kitty chomp as long as it ain't fermented like Mrs. William's rancid cooch.

Like this? and

It would take more then a knife. Bitch better have a bazooka!

I just lost my lunch..............

The levels of wrongness here are innumerable, but what gets me most is the ex-husband refuses, but his buddy is initially like, "Sure!"

I have no words.

I also nearly lost my lunch.

Lammastide said:

The levels of wrongness here are innumerable, but what gets me most is the ex-husband refuses, but his buddy is initially like, "Sure!"

Maybe he's a necropheliac.

CuddlyBear said:

Lammastide said:

The levels of wrongness here are innumerable, but what gets me most is the ex-husband refuses, but his buddy is initially like, "Sure!"

Maybe he's a necropheliac.

You are so bad.

Graycap23 said:

I just lost my lunch..............

Me too

And I haven't eaten anything

Lammastide said:

I'm pretty sure it's the lighting in that picture ...

SCNDLS said:

CuddlyBear said:

And sometimes all you need to do is ask. I'm always up for a little kitty chomp as long as it ain't fermented like Mrs. William's rancid cooch.

Like this? and

eeeeeewwww wtf?? That is nastiness, unadulterated coochie funk being exposed right there.

A bitch needs to know how to wash her ass before she can expect any man to put his face down there. Nothing worse than a cheesy cooch. YUCK!

okay time for more TMI.

i went to vote last tuesday, got there around 7:30 before the 8 pm closing time. had to wait for a booth, finally there was a spot.

went over and next to me was a woman in her yoga tights (you know those snug-fitting capri like pants), and guess she had just come from working out or whatever (i hope at least).

well, after few seconds of standing there filling out my form, i caught a whiff of the most godawful stench coming from her - and i knew it wasn't underarm stench. i mean it was GROSS; i couldn't freakin' breath, and i really didn't want to. i tried that trick where you try to breathe through your clothes -- nope, the stench was too powerful.

she had been standing there long before me so i was hoping she was almost done. but no, she was still taking her sweet time.

fortunately, i had marked up my sample ballot and all i had to do was zip through the form, making my little marks on the ballot. you have never seen someone vote so fast. i got the eff outta there QUICK...next year, i'm voting absentee.

paintedlady said:

A bitch needs to know how to wash her ass before she can expect any man to put his face down there. Nothing worse than a cheesy cooch. YUCK!

Cheesy cooch? eeewww.. The worst is it when it smells like a mixture of old fish and vomit...yuck.

I always make my girl clean up before I go downtown. But after this story, my tongue is gonna take a vacation from that bushy carpet.

[Edited 11/9/10 16:07pm]