nevermind

[Edited 11/16/10 18:37pm]

I would have kept more journals/diaries.

I would have taken on law school when I was supposed to.

'If u could change ONLY 1 single event in your life, what would it be?'

Absolutely nothing. I never look back at my past at what some may consider a failure, mistake or any wrong doing, as I only know about experiences & lessons I've learned. None of my experiences have actually been failures & totally no point in looking back at what doesn't exist because I won't find it anywhere. Living life with no regrets is my only way & it keeps the dynamics stable in all other areas of my life as well.

Usually I would say nothing eventhough lots of things that have happened that were not great in my life but as others have said, the hard stuff makes you stronger and it teaches you life lessons.

If I HAD to pick on event, it would be the blind date that I went on Jan 16, 1991.

That turned into a waste of 5 years. I cannot say that I learned much or had anything happy come out of those 5 years.

I do not look back on that time with any fondness or special memories.

I've always said I have no regrets cause whatever happened was all part of the plan, even though I would never enjoy the present and what I was doing and wished I was doing something else. I work in social service, but music is what I love too.

My depression got bad in 2009 and right before MJ passed and even moreso after he did, I regretted not following my teenage dream of being in the music industry and letting fear get to me. I would see people like Britney and Beyonce talk about becoming big and being inspired by him and meeting him and saw myself doing the same, so I was so emotional and sad that I let my shyness keep me from doing that even if it's good I went to school and got a degree.

I also regretted not living on campus when I went to university though I wanted to so badly, my dad said he wouldn't pay unless I was going out of town. My parents were having trouble getting along so if I was away from all that and if less time went towards commuting and more time to study, maybe I would have turned out completely different. Sure I could have saved up on money to live there, but he was spending heaps of it at that time constantly on someone.

I once went out with my friend and wasn't honest with my family about where I'm going that night, and when we parted ways for the night and she was going back to her apartment, she met a guy in the elevator she got in a relationship with and got pregnant 2 weeks later, she was still a teenager, and her life became bad for about 2 years until she picked herself up again. I blamed myself for it until I opened up and was told it's not my fault. I just had no one else to go with and dragged her into it and felt like that was my punishment or something like that Now I'm old enough to understand free will and people making their own choices and she could have.

Graycap23 said:

LadyLuvSexxy said:

Saying "no" when my dad offered me a better life down in TN. I stayed because I didn't want to leave my "man" at the time--a cat who ended up dumping me in a dirty way anyway. I could be married and babied up by a nice Southern gentleman by now, damn it.

U really want 2 be babied up?

It wouldn't be so bad to have a little family of my own. The thing is, I'd have an easier time molding the life I wanted down in TN than I would here in Chicago. I've lived down there before, and the way things just roll in that town...it puts the big city to shame in some ways. Their requirements for teaching are way lower, there's lots of openings for behind-the-scenes work...and people there are just really friendly. I just regret staying because I didn't want to "upset the balance" of my relationship at the time. I was under the impression that he and I were going to get married.