First, forgive me as I have no idea what this thread may open up, but I think this might be an enlightening discussion...

With the recent highlight on LGBTQ teens grappling with the sheer will to stay alive amid enormous pressures, I'm somewhat curious about the broader question of all people -- and particularly youth -- who face the temptations of suicide. If you guys don't mind sharing, what's your history with suicide? Have any close friends/family members taken their lives? What are some of your thoughts about the phenomenon? Have you ever struggled with the temptation in younger years (or now)? If so, what sort of thing stopped/is stopping you? What, if anything, can others know/do that might help those suffering so deeply? Any general words for others who may be in this crisis?

I ask that we all appreciate the sensitivity and diversity of views around this topic, and thanks to those of you who are willing to contribute.

[Edited 10/7/10 14:16pm]

See http://prince.org/msg/100/344930

Very sensitive subject, but I'll contribute. When I was a teenager I considered suicide I thought about it because of traumatic things that happened to me as a child-I was in a very dark place I even thought about how I would do it what ultimately changed my mind was the fact that i had survived this traumatic event in the first place. I realized that God had sparred my life and allowed me to live and for that I was grateful I really believe that people who consider suicide need counseling or even someone to show them a better relationship with God or whatever higher power they believe in I considered doing that at 17 and now I am 38-life has it's ups and downs, but I am happy to have lived to see them all.

anytime i've ever thought about something like this i always think about people that have diseases and are very sick that keep fighting to be alive and it makes life seem a lot better.

[Edited 10/7/10 14:32pm]

i've dabbled as an adolescent, but i bottled out every time. shame. i could have died prettier.

Wheelman said:

anytime i've ever thought about something like this i always think about people that have diseases and are very sick that keep fighting to be alive and it makes life seem a lot better.

[Edited 10/7/10 14:32pm]

Exactly

luv4u said:

See http://prince.org/msg/100/344930

That's a thread about bullying.

This is a thread about suicide.

I've tried it and thought about it more times than I'd like to say.

I'm very happy that I was never successful.

I have a brother that attempted suicide a couple of times. I love all my siblings equally but I take great interest in supporting him and letting him know that I am here for him.

As for me, I would have totally killed myself like these young teens had it not been for the fact that I was afraid to die more than I wanted to die.

Of course, now that I am following my path freely and worshipping God in the way that is right for me, I am so glad that the fear overwhelmed the desire. I do like the current campaign "It gets better" but my hope is that these young men and women actually have people in their real life, face to face that they can turn to.

Interesting though, in my Spiritual Psychology program, someone openly admitted that they wanted to commit suicide. Like if it wasn't for her daughter she would do it right then and there I worked directly with her in a trio and there didn't seem to be any approach that took her away from this desire for herself. To that I say thank God for her daughter!

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

I have a brother that attempted suicide a couple of times. I love all my siblings equally but I take great interest in supporting him and letting him know that I am here for him.

As for me, I would have totally killed myself like these young teens had it not been for the fact that I was afraid to die more than I wanted to die.

Of course, now that I am following my path freely and worshipping God in the way that is right for me, I am so glad that the fear overwhelmed the desire. I do like the current campaign "It gets better" but my hope is that these young men and women actually have people in their real life, face to face that they can turn to.

I agree-nicely said

PunkMistress said:

luv4u said:

See http://prince.org/msg/100/344930

That's a thread about bullying.

This is a thread about suicide.

I've tried it and thought about it more times than I'd like to say.

I'm very happy that I was never successful.

Some people have actually done suicide because of being bullied

luv4u said:

PunkMistress said:

That's a thread about bullying.

This is a thread about suicide.

I've tried it and thought about it more times than I'd like to say.

I'm very happy that I was never successful.

Some people have actually done suicide because of being bullied

Yes.

Yes, they have.

PunkMistress said:

I think lots of kids think about suicide especially after being bullied. I was bullied (somewhat) and at one point was made fun of because of my voice and because I was always putting my face in books. I did thought of suicide but I don't know if I knew what it was about. I think after dealing with shit in middle school, I learned how to handle myself without allowing that to overwhelm my life.

My words to those young teens (or anybody) who feels this is the answer is to surround themselves with what. they. love. For me it was music. I spent most of my young life by myself listening and dancing to music. Of anything, that is what saved my life.

The first time I wanted to kill myself is when I was fourteen. I was dealing with the aftermath of my sexual abuse and having a parent who gave more of a damn about her boyfriend than her four children. It was the only time I actually tried it.

The last time I wanted to kill myself was in March. Fortunately I got smart enough to get help for myself. Today, I can't believe that person was me. My body is wracked with pain everyday from two autoimmune diseases but I am glad everyday to still be here.

Those feelings, in my opinion, are very isolating feelings. It does not matter who loves you or who you would be leaving behind. All that matters is the mental hell you are going through at the moment and you just want it to stop. It is not something done to hurt those that love you and I really wish more people understood that. Being on the other side of it now, i would say to someone struggling: get professional help. Talking to a total neutral party who won't tell you to "get over it" will help you immensely.

Vendetta1 said:

The first time I wanted to kill myself is when I was fourteen. I was dealing with the aftermath of my sexual abuse and having a parent who gave more of a damn about her boyfriend than her four children. It was the only time I actually tried it.

The last time I wanted to kill myself was in March. Fortunately I got smart enough to get help for myself. Today, I can't believe that person was me. My body is wracked with pain everyday from two autoimmune diseases but I am glad everyday to still be here.

Those feelings, in my opinion, are very isolating feelings. It does not matter who loves you or who you would be leaving behind. All that matters is the mental hell you are going through at the moment and you just want it to stop. It is not something done to hurt those that love you and I really wish more people understood that. Being on the other side of it now, i would say to someone struggling: get professional help. Talking to a total neutral party who won't tell you to "get over it" will help you immensely.

That describes my feelings perfectly.

That's the part that people who've never been there will never understand.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

My words to those young teens (or anybody) who feels this is the answer is to surround themselves with what. they. love. For me it was music. I spent most of my young life by myself listening and dancing to music. Of anything, that is what saved my life.

For me, when I was in the depths of depression and mental anguish, nothing made me happy or gave me pleasure. I couldn't sit still long enough to enjoy anything; all I could do was cry and hurt.

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

My words to those young teens (or anybody) who feels this is the answer is to surround themselves with what. they. love. For me it was music. I spent most of my young life by myself listening and dancing to music. Of anything, that is what saved my life.

Music kept me sane from any stupid thoughts. I'm glad I didn't go ahead and slit my wrists. Especially after reading about suicide, I decided to try to battle any hurt I may have been going through.

I've never contemplated suicide.

I mean, I've had thoughts like if Ron was no longer in my life would I do this?...but not with any degree of certainty that I actually might.

My mother was very ill and in a lot of pain and pretty much completely disabled at the end of her life. She asked us to assist end her pain. Actually, technically she asked that we make all of her medications (heavy heavy doses of Oxycontin among other things) available. Since the use of her hands was extremely affected, I used to dispense all of her meds. We made a deal (it was right around Christmas, a very special time for us always and this particular year we had a larger than usual family reunion) that if she could hang on and the pain did not ease after the holiday, we'd help her.

Miraculously her pain seemed to ease somewhat (it was never going to get considerably better at that point) during the holiday, and she even was able to reunite with her mother (who had not wanted anything to do with us since my high school days). She passed on New Year's Eve 1999.

I would have followed on my promise, even if it destroyed me inside to do so. It was much worse to watch her suffer with no end in sight.

[Edited 10/7/10 15:05pm]

PunkMistress said:

Vendetta1 said:

The first time I wanted to kill myself is when I was fourteen. I was dealing with the aftermath of my sexual abuse and having a parent who gave more of a damn about her boyfriend than her four children. It was the only time I actually tried it.

The last time I wanted to kill myself was in March. Fortunately I got smart enough to get help for myself. Today, I can't believe that person was me. My body is wracked with pain everyday from two autoimmune diseases but I am glad everyday to still be here.

Those feelings, in my opinion, are very isolating feelings. It does not matter who loves you or who you would be leaving behind. All that matters is the mental hell you are going through at the moment and you just want it to stop. It is not something done to hurt those that love you and I really wish more people understood that. Being on the other side of it now, i would say to someone struggling: get professional help. Talking to a total neutral party who won't tell you to "get over it" will help you immensely.

That describes my feelings perfectly.

That's the part that people who've never been there will never understand.

I agree.

PunkMistress said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

My words to those young teens (or anybody) who feels this is the answer is to surround themselves with what. they. love. For me it was music. I spent most of my young life by myself listening and dancing to music. Of anything, that is what saved my life.

For me, when I was in the depths of depression and mental anguish, nothing made me happy or gave me pleasure. I couldn't sit still long enough to enjoy anything; all I could do was cry and hurt.

well for me when I wanted more than anything to be dead, music helped me get through. maybe that's just an isolated experience.

johnart said:

I've never contemplated suicide.
My mother was very ill and in a lot of pain and pretty much completely disabled at the end of her life. She asked us to assist end her pain. Actually, technically she asked that we make all of her medications (heavy heavy doses of Oxycontin among other things) available. Since the use of her hands was extremely affected, I used to dispense all of her meds. We made a deal (it was right around Christmas, a very special time for us always and this particular year we had a larger than usual family reunion) that if she could hang on and the pain did not ease after the holiday, we'd help her.

Miraculously her pain seemed to ease somewhat (it was never going to get considerably better at that point) during the holiday, and she even was able to reunite with her mother (who had not wanted anything to do with us since my high school days). She passed on New Year's Eve 1999.

I would have followed on my promise, even if it destroyed me inside to do so. It was much worse to watch her suffer with no end in sight.

Vendetta1 said:

johnart said:

I've never contemplated suicide.
My mother was very ill and in a lot of pain and pretty much completely disabled at the end of her life. She asked us to assist end her pain. Actually, technically she asked that we make all of her medications (heavy heavy doses of Oxycontin among other things) available. Since the use of her hands was extremely affected, I used to dispense all of her meds. We made a deal (it was right around Christmas, a very special time for us always and this particular year we had a larger than usual family reunion) that if she could hang on and the pain did not ease after the holiday, we'd help her.

Miraculously her pain seemed to ease somewhat (it was never going to get considerably better at that point) during the holiday, and she even was able to reunite with her mother (who had not wanted anything to do with us since my high school days). She passed on New Year's Eve 1999.

I would have followed on my promise, even if it destroyed me inside to do so. It was much worse to watch her suffer with no end in sight.

Vendetta1 said:

The first time I wanted to kill myself is when I was fourteen. I was dealing with the aftermath of my sexual abuse and having a parent who gave more of a damn about her boyfriend than her four children. It was the only time I actually tried it.

The last time I wanted to kill myself was in March. Fortunately I got smart enough to get help for myself. Today, I can't believe that person was me. My body is wracked with pain everyday from two autoimmune diseases but I am glad everyday to still be here.

Those feelings, in my opinion, are very isolating feelings. It does not matter who loves you or who you would be leaving behind. All that matters is the mental hell you are going through at the moment and you just want it to stop. It is not something done to hurt those that love you and I really wish more people understood that. Being on the other side of it now, i would say to someone struggling: get professional help. Talking to a total neutral party who won't tell you to "get over it" will help you immensely.

Someone here shared a story of a man who actually did it to hurt his girlfriend/wife. Not generally the reason why but this one man did it exactly for those reasons. wow

The only times I wanted to kill myself was over two ex boyfriends. Stupidity on my part. I also found a certain romantic quality about it, which is sad now that I look back.

My cousin tried to kill herself popping a bunch of pills. It did not work, thank God. We managed to get her to the hospital and they gave her this charcoal stuff to bring up. She has had a hard time dealing with the sudden death of her mother (my aunt).

She seems to be doing well now. I've told her to me anytime she wants to talk.

PunkMistress said:

SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said:

My words to those young teens (or anybody) who feels this is the answer is to surround themselves with what. they. love. For me it was music. I spent most of my young life by myself listening and dancing to music. Of anything, that is what saved my life.

For me, when I was in the depths of depression and mental anguish, nothing made me happy or gave me pleasure. I couldn't sit still long enough to enjoy anything; all I could do was cry and hurt.

What kept you here?

Interesting subject and I have had my share of it.

When I was a teenager I tried to kill myself and I have the scars on my wrists to remind me of that time in my life. I wanted to die due to my abusive Mother, my own self worth at being a child of adoption and having her adoptive Mother beat her and say she wished she never adopted me. It was a time in my life that I will never forget. I am thankful now that I didn't die, because I realize now what I would have missed out on.

Sadly my son who is 17 now had to deal with two friends taking their own lives. He was in 6th grade at the time and his dear friend hung himself in the tree house they use to play in. He killed himself because he was picked on in school for being nerdy etc...He would have graduated high school last year if he didn't do this. Picking on a child is awful and it angers me when it happens. I get upset with the kids doing it, and the parents that won't open their eyes and realize their child is a bully. That saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me." So wrong!!! Words are the worst and can scar you for life.

Then about a month later my son's crush shot herself in the head in her bedroom because she thought her adoptive parents were going to give her back. Why she thought this way I don't know. This young lady left voice messages on her best friend's cell phone and my son's telling them good-bye. My son to this day has pictures of her hanging on his bedroom wall.

Both suicides deeply hurt my son, and broke my heart.