DesireeNevermind said:

taking care of their kids e.g. emotionally & financially. You know....credit for being involved fathers, attending school functions, attending games, helping the child with homework, handling yucky chores like diaper changing and cleaning up vomit/snotty noses, and taking the kid to and from school.

Or is that just the shit they ought to do? I heard a radio commentator saying that there's not enough credit given to fathers and that most family ads show women as the primary caregiver.

Discuss...

in my view, it should be a given, but they simply don't fuckin do it enough for it to be considered USUAL rather than unusual and therefore medal worthy or something

I hate a particular ad with a vengeance at the moment, it's some bullshit insect spray - soooooo patronising. The woman wants to protect her children and becomes a superhero brandishing poison. The voice-over makes me want to puke.

I'd like to see more men doing stuff like hosting kids parties, looking after kids when they are sick, sorting out notes from school, cleaning up after meals etc, in the media. It's obvious to me men watch telly and it makes them think "I don't have to do that, it's a woman's job"

Vendetta1 said:

Cerebus said:

This is one of those threads where like, I WANT to say a whole bunch of things, but I'm not going to.

I will say I agree with pretty much everything that's been posted in response to the original question thus far.

Then orgnote me. I wanna hear this.

he will say "don't have KIDS!!!!"

ZombieKitten said:

Vendetta1 said:

Then orgnote me. I wanna hear this.

he will say "don't have KIDS!!!!"

No, I wouldn't. And she knew that.

NDRU said:

of course they do. We don't question it when people celebrate mothers, do we?

if there is someone out there celebrating what I do on a daily basis (and I don't mean in general, I mean appreciating ME and the work I do - this house doesn't run itself) I'd like them to put their hand up.

it's unpaid and it sucks basically, especially the unappreciated part

TotalANXiousNESS said:

I give men who take care of their children credit and praise. Only because it is so uncommon. I mean yeah, they should be doin' it but for some reason a lot don't. So any guy who shows the effort to be as involved in the parenting as the wife I truly commend.

Besides, a little praise never hurt anyone.

Cerebus I wanna hear your answer. I'm bored.

are they praising YOU? and I don't mean buttering you up for sex

Cerebus said:

ZombieKitten said:

he will say "don't have KIDS!!!!"

No, I wouldn't. And she knew that.

you used to be FUN

ZombieKitten said:

DesireeNevermind said:

taking care of their kids e.g. emotionally & financially. You know....credit for being involved fathers, attending school functions, attending games, helping the child with homework, handling yucky chores like diaper changing and cleaning up vomit/snotty noses, and taking the kid to and from school.

Or is that just the shit they ought to do? I heard a radio commentator saying that there's not enough credit given to fathers and that most family ads show women as the primary caregiver.

Discuss...

in my view, it should be a given, but they simply don't fuckin do it enough for it to be considered USUAL rather than unusual and therefore medal worthy or something

I hate a particular ad with a vengeance at the moment, it's some bullshit insect spray - soooooo patronising. The woman wants to protect her children and becomes a superhero brandishing poison. The voice-over makes me want to puke.

I'd like to see more men doing stuff like hosting kids parties, looking after kids when they are sick, sorting out notes from school, cleaning up after meals etc, in the media. It's obvious to me men watch telly and it makes them think "I don't have to do that, it's a woman's job"

I can't think of any commercials where the Dad does this stuff. Usually commercials feature a single mom or a traditional family where the Dad is sitting on his ass chomping down snacks. There's one commercial where a Dad put his baby to sleep so he could go play a video game.

i don't know if any parent should really be praised for doing what they are supposed to do for their child anyways. but having said that i do admire my husband for being a father to our son that goes above and beyond what i could of ever imagined for our child. i do thank him for all the extra help he gives me even after he worked a 12 hour shift at his job. he is the kind of dad that will always make time for his son.

johnart said:

Wait, why do men not deserve praise, if women do, assuming the are as involved as the woman in their child's life? Also keeping in mind that if the woman is a stay at home mom and the man has to do all that is involved in providing (or most, even), there is just no possible way that the man could possibly have equal "real" time in that child's life.

Or am I not gettting what is being said here? This is entirely possible.

[Edited 9/29/10 20:33pm]

Gotta agree here. IF the woman gets praise, so should the man. (and vice versa).

What really kills me is so many people assume that the MAN is going to abandon his responisibilities. Women do this as well...but people just automatically assume that the man always going to be a deadbeat.

=0P

Hero0101 said:

johnart said:

Wait, why do men not deserve praise, if women do, assuming the are as involved as the woman in their child's life? Also keeping in mind that if the woman is a stay at home mom and the man has to do all that is involved in providing (or most, even), there is just no possible way that the man could possibly have equal "real" time in that child's life.

Or am I not gettting what is being said here? This is entirely possible.

[Edited 9/29/10 20:33pm]

Gotta agree here. IF the woman gets praise, so should the man. (and vice versa).

What really kills me is so many people assume that the MAN is going to abandon his responisibilities. Women do this as well...but people just automatically assume that the man always going to be a deadbeat.

=0P

you're right, many women do this too, my own grandma did this to her kids when they were little. she ran off with another man, and just left her kids with her husband. didn't tell anyone where she was going. and the police found her living hundreds of miles away with a new guy after 6 months of not even calling to check on her kids.

JustErin said:

johnart said:

Oh no, either parent I can get. I was looking at it as women should get praise but men no.

I don't get why anyone should be praised for doing what they are supposed to be doing. I guess if one parent is struggling because the other is MIA or not doing much to help, I can give them credit for managing on their own.

Me either. Just like at work when someone thinks they deserve all sorts of high fives and shit because they did their job. Umm isn't that the point - that you're supposed do it?

.

[Edited 9/30/10 19:53pm]

DesireeNevermind said:

I can't think of any commercials where the Dad does this stuff. Usually commercials feature a single mom or a traditional family where the Dad is sitting on his ass chomping down snacks. There's one commercial where a Dad put his baby to sleep so he could go play a video game.

This blog sort of describes how I feel about dads in commercials.

http://blog.seattlepi.com/beastmom/archives/134436.asp

FauxReal said:

DesireeNevermind said:

I can't think of any commercials where the Dad does this stuff. Usually commercials feature a single mom or a traditional family where the Dad is sitting on his ass chomping down snacks. There's one commercial where a Dad put his baby to sleep so he could go play a video game.

This blog sort of describes how I feel about dads in commercials.

http://blog.seattlepi.com/beastmom/archives/134436.asp

do men REALLY not know where the linen cupboard is?

I have to tell him EVERY time :confuse;

ZombieKitten said:

FauxReal said:

This blog sort of describes how I feel about dads in commercials.

http://blog.seattlepi.com/beastmom/archives/134436.asp

do men REALLY not know where the linen cupboard is?

I have to tell him EVERY time :confuse;

I do. Always have. Married, single, as a kid. Of course, we generally have linen closets, but yeah.

ALso, if the commercial is for paint, deck staining, yardwork...it'll be a guy doing it, guaranteed. Because that's "a man's job".

FauxReal said:

ZombieKitten said:

do men REALLY not know where the linen cupboard is?

I have to tell him EVERY time :confuse;

I do. Always have. Married, single, as a kid. Of course, we generally have linen closets, but yeah.

ALso, if the commercial is for paint, deck staining, yardwork...it'll be a guy doing it, guaranteed. Because that's "a man's job".

a guy will go out and spend all afternoon in the hardware store to avoid going into the house

or so I've heard

I can't get mine to LEAVE all he does is take all afternoon NAPS

It's called Father's Day.

Keyumdi said:

It's called Father's Day.

I'm assuming you've also heard of Mother's Day, then?

Vendetta1 said:

No, they don't but it's such a rarity and that's why it's celebrated so much.

I'd have to agree with this. It should be automatic, but truth is it isn't.

Cerebus said:

Keyumdi said:

It's called Father's Day.

I'm assuming you've also heard of Mother's Day, then?

You are assuming, most definitely. I never said mothers shouldn't get any credit.

Keyumdi said:

Cerebus said:

I'm assuming you've also heard of Mother's Day, then?

You are assuming, most definitely. I never said mothers shouldn't get any credit.

Not really the point I was trying to make.

Cerebus said:

Keyumdi said:

You are assuming, most definitely. I never said mothers shouldn't get any credit.

Not really the point I was trying to make.

Hmmmm. Alrighty.

Let me play Devil's advocate for a tad..

Define "credit:?, i mean really, what the fuck is credit, and if its just a nod of acknowledgement, will we really be upset if we don't get it, i sure as fuck wouldn't

scandalousalan said:

Let me play Devil's advocate for a tad..

Define "credit:?, i mean really, what the fuck is credit, and if its just a nod of acknowledgement, will we really be upset if we don't get it, i sure as fuck wouldn't

credit at your corner store means you can't pay for it now

MEN deserve credit because WE own the seed; you women "only" own the plantpot so I guess it's 50/50...

[Edited 10/2/10 4:18am]

JoeTyler said:

MEN deserve credit because WE own the seed; you women "only" own the plantpot so I guess it's 50/50...

If 50/50 if both people are rearing the child or whatever the couple has agreed to. It's like these sperm donors who come out the wood work after their child achieved fame and fortune, hasn't raised chick nor child.