heartbeatocean said:

Serious said:

No not at all. The thing us that we have been so very close for pretty much all our adult lives, much closer than most couples. He is my family for me, much more than my "real" family and he still means so much to me . And yes I depend on him for emotional support even though I don't get it anymore .

He probably feels like you that he has to move on and it just hurts me so very much . I could have never imagined we would not stay friends all or lives and I don't even want to think that it might be like that one day .

How very painful. I'm so sorry. My parents got divorced after 25 years. I still think they are bound to each other in such a deep way that will never change and they both feel the tragedy of their separation very deeply.

My ex told me that he went back to see our therapist and spent the entire session sobbing in grief. I just felt so relieved when we broke up, never shed a tear. So I think part of my difficulty in this situation is having to hurt him.

But we were only together 2 years. And your story sounds much, much more serious. I hope you can find space for yourself and this pain. Sounds like there is a lot left in it to feel.

Thank you so much .

I totally feel like you describe your parents feel . And my ex feels like you: sorry that he has to hurt me all the time and feeling aweful about that and thus wanting to step away even further . It's a hard situation for both people involved . I hope the therapist can help your ex and that the situation will be easier to deal with for both of you then.

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[Edited 9/18/10 16:48pm]