PunkMistress said:

prb said:

all true what i said...

honestly, if i am having a "why me" kind of day, i only have to look to you and Ivy...you both inspire me to "get over myself" and get on with it, but in a nice kind of way....not the "snap out of it" style from ppl who wouldnt have a clue...(which, sadly, sometimes includes family)

and i reckon, even if you halved your half cool, youd still be up there on the coolness scale

You're pretty damn cool yourself.

i have my moments

generally, im a

prb said:

Erin and Ivy

Both of you are two of the strongest ppl i have "met" here, and sharing your experiences definitely helps us mere mortals

Thank you

[Edited 7/10/10 17:03pm]

That is so sweet. Thank you.

prb said:

PunkMistress said:

Oh, sweetie. What a nice thing to say.

We all present our "best selves" here, I think. I'm sure I'm not half as cool and strong as I might appear on the internets.

[Edited 7/10/10 17:12pm]

all true what i said...

honestly, if i am having a "why me" kind of day, i only have to look to you and Ivy...you both inspire me to "get over myself" and get on with it, but in a nice kind of way....not the "snap out of it" style from ppl who wouldnt have a clue...(which, sadly, sometimes includes family)

and i reckon, even if you halved your half cool, youd still be up there on the coolness scale

You have no idea how much this makes my day, night, week, month, year.

I don't have any advice. I suffer from depression as well. I refuse to take those meds though because they can increase suicidal thoughts, which I have on a regular basis.

I'm just trying to cope with it.

SHOCKADELICA1 said:

I don't have any advice. I suffer from depression as well. I refuse to take those meds though because they can increase suicidal thoughts, which I have on a regular basis.

I'm just trying to cope with it.

Ask your doctor to start you on them gradually. I was on one that did increase those thoughts but I stopped taking it and got on something else that my doctor started little by little.

I can't lie to you, you are not going to feel better right away but when you do, it will be better. You just have to tell yourself that you are making progress and that you are doing something to help yourself.

Vendetta1 said:

SHOCKADELICA1 said:

I don't have any advice. I suffer from depression as well. I refuse to take those meds though because they can increase suicidal thoughts, which I have on a regular basis.

I'm just trying to cope with it.

Ask your doctor to start you on them gradually. I was on one that did increase those thoughts but I stopped taking it and got on something else that my doctor started little by little.

I can't lie to you, you are not going to feel better right away but when you do, it will be better. You just have to tell yourself that you are making progress and that you are doing something to help yourself.

Thank u.

SHOCKADELICA1 said:

Vendetta1 said:

Ask your doctor to start you on them gradually. I was on one that did increase those thoughts but I stopped taking it and got on something else that my doctor started little by little.

I can't lie to you, you are not going to feel better right away but when you do, it will be better. You just have to tell yourself that you are making progress and that you are doing something to help yourself.

Thank u.

You're welcome.

I want to sy thank you ever so much for all your kind thoughts and also the very helpful advice. I am waiting for the drugs to kick in and hopefully feel some effect.

Unique - wonderful advice and I will take it on board and put it into practice.

PunkMistress - hugs and kisses

And to all the other wonderful Orgers - thank you so much - I do not feel alone.

I love you all.

xxxxx

Vendetta1 said:

prb said:

all true what i said...

honestly, if i am having a "why me" kind of day, i only have to look to you and Ivy...you both inspire me to "get over myself" and get on with it, but in a nice kind of way....not the "snap out of it" style from ppl who wouldnt have a clue...(which, sadly, sometimes includes family)

and i reckon, even if you halved your half cool, youd still be up there on the coolness scale

You have no idea how much this makes my day, night, week, month, year.

blueblossom said:

I want to sy thank you ever so much for all your kind thoughts and also the very helpful advice. I am waiting for the drugs to kick in and hopefully feel some effect.

Unique - wonderful advice and I will take it on board and put it into practice.

PunkMistress - hugs and kisses

And to all the other wonderful Orgers - thank you so much - I do not feel alone.

I love you all.

xxxxx

remember, you are never alone here on the org

I think the most important thing is telling other people; your friends, family, your manager at work...

Walking helps me too. I have no idea why, but it does.

I don't take medication. I tried to self-medicate with St. John's Wort tablets, but they made me worse.

blueblossom said:

I have been diagnosed with depression and am now on drugs. I have stress relating depression - it all got a bit too much for me at work, plus I suffered horrific pain again with kidney stones and its all had an impact.

Does anyone on here suffer with depression and what are you coping mechanisms - I have none at the moment - I just cry and give up - I have no fight left in me. My hair has agan started to fall out and the Dr says that it is all stress and I am not handling it well. What do I do to get better? I can't stay in this depressive hell hole but at the moment see no way out of.

I suffer from bipolar depression, I don't know if what I'm taking is working or not, I'm still up and down with my moods and anger and everything, I've had a hard year and a half or more, losing mj cemented it for me though before that it was an abusive work situation, a relapse from the last depression, getting over a back injury and getting stressed from paperwork behind it etc.. I need to talk about it some more. I think I have some OCD too.

[Edited 7/11/10 9:09am]

alphastreet said:

blueblossom said:

I have been diagnosed with depression and am now on drugs. I have stress relating depression - it all got a bit too much for me at work, plus I suffered horrific pain again with kidney stones and its all had an impact.

Does anyone on here suffer with depression and what are you coping mechanisms - I have none at the moment - I just cry and give up - I have no fight left in me. My hair has agan started to fall out and the Dr says that it is all stress and I am not handling it well. What do I do to get better? I can't stay in this depressive hell hole but at the moment see no way out of.

I suffer from bipolar depression, I don't know if what I'm taking is working or not, I'm still up and down with my moods and anger and everything, I've had a hard year and a half or more, losing mj cemented it for me though before that it was an abusive work situation, a relapse from the last depression, getting over a back injury and getting stressed from paperwork behind it etc.. I need to talk about it some more. I think I have some OCD too.

[Edited 7/11/10 9:09am]

Have you discussed this with your doctor? I had to have my meds raised and it helped me tremendously.

Last time I went he suggested I take something that will ease the obsessive thoughts though those only happen sometimes though when it does it makes me more anxious. And I've noticed it's mostly situations that make my moods go high and low too or affect my sleep habits sometimes.

alphastreet said:

Last time I went he suggested I take something that will ease the obsessive thoughts though those only happen sometimes though when it does it makes me more anxious. And I've noticed it's mostly situations that make my moods go high and low too or affect my sleep habits sometimes.

I was going through that, too.

The change in medication made it easier to deal with those lows and highs.

I am indebted to you all talking about this subject. I sometimes thought that it is a silent suffering but I needed to shout it out that I am not well but because the illness has no obvious outward signs of illness (eg like a broken leg) only the mood swings, crying, and lethargy what do you say to people, it was only when I broken down crying at work that people started to realise that something was wrong. My GP said that I was ill and needed help (she even cuddled me because I was so low - what a great Dr). I have to see her in 2 weeks to see if the meds are kicking in and I have to see her every month after that. She said that I should have as much time off as I need. Talking with you here on the Org is wonderful - I do not think you realise how important you all are to me.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart....(here I go again...crying).!!

blueblossom said:

I am indebted to you all talking about this subject. I sometimes thought that it is a silent suffering but I needed to shout it out that I am not well but because the illness has no obvious outward signs of illness (eg like a broken leg) only the mood swings, crying, and lethargy what do you say to people, it was only when I broken down crying at work that people started to realise that something was wrong. My GP said that I was ill and needed help (she even cuddled me because I was so low - what a great Dr). I have to see her in 2 weeks to see if the meds are kicking in and I have to see her every month after that. She said that I should have as much time off as I need. Talking with you here on the Org is wonderful - I do not think you realise how important you all are to me.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart....(here I go again...crying).!!

PunkMistress said:

blueblossom said:

I am indebted to you all talking about this subject. I sometimes thought that it is a silent suffering but I needed to shout it out that I am not well but because the illness has no obvious outward signs of illness (eg like a broken leg) only the mood swings, crying, and lethargy what do you say to people, it was only when I broken down crying at work that people started to realise that something was wrong. My GP said that I was ill and needed help (she even cuddled me because I was so low - what a great Dr). I have to see her in 2 weeks to see if the meds are kicking in and I have to see her every month after that. She said that I should have as much time off as I need. Talking with you here on the Org is wonderful - I do not think you realise how important you all are to me.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart....(here I go again...crying).!!

thank you so much xx

GirlBrother said:

I think the most important thing is telling other people; your friends, family, your manager at work...

Walking helps me too. I have no idea why, but it does.

I don't take medication. I tried to self-medicate with St. John's Wort tablets, but they made me worse.

I suffer from depression too (have for awhile now). I made the mistake of telling my manager of the department where I worked that I was suffering from depression (not once did I tell him, but twice). He acted like a jerk about it, telling me, "Well, I know nothing at all about that. Take care of it". Yeah, thanks alot, wanker! Because I was depressed, my performance was not what it should have been. I showed up to work every day any way, because my boss did not like it when I called in sick.

When review time came around, this same manager gave me the worst review EVER in my 20+ years I have worked in Corporate America. He criticized and found fault with EVERYTHING that I did, even the way I organized my desk! Needless to say, I was so upset and angry by his "I don't give a shit" attitude, that I quit right there on the spot.

The point of this story is, I wouldn't be so quick to tell a manager at work if you suffer from depression. A lot of them just don't give a damn, and they just have a certain protocol for managing the people that are under them that they follow. I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

blueblossom said:

I am indebted to you all talking about this subject. I sometimes thought that it is a silent suffering but I needed to shout it out that I am not well but because the illness has no obvious outward signs of illness (eg like a broken leg) only the mood swings, crying, and lethargy what do you say to people, it was only when I broken down crying at work that people started to realise that something was wrong. My GP said that I was ill and needed help (she even cuddled me because I was so low - what a great Dr). I have to see her in 2 weeks to see if the meds are kicking in and I have to see her every month after that. She said that I should have as much time off as I need. Talking with you here on the Org is wonderful - I do not think you realise how important you all are to me.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart....(here I go again...crying).!!

Don't be afraid to cry. Tears can be healing.

psychodelicide said:

GirlBrother said:

I think the most important thing is telling other people; your friends, family, your manager at work...

Walking helps me too. I have no idea why, but it does.

I don't take medication. I tried to self-medicate with St. John's Wort tablets, but they made me worse.

I suffer from depression too (have for awhile now). I made the mistake of telling my manager of the department where I worked that I was suffering from depression (not once did I tell him, but twice). He acted like a jerk about it, telling me, "Well, I know nothing at all about that. Take care of it". Yeah, thanks alot, wanker! Because I was depressed, my performance was not what it should have been. I showed up to work every day any way, because my boss did not like it when I called in sick.

When review time came around, this same manager gave me the worst review EVER in my 20+ years I have worked in Corporate America. He criticized and found fault with EVERYTHING that I did, even the way I organized my desk! Needless to say, I was so upset and angry by his "I don't give a shit" attitude, that I quit right there on the spot.

The point of this story is, I wouldn't be so quick to tell a manager at work if you suffer from depression. A lot of them just don't give a damn, and they just have a certain protocol for managing the people that are under them that they follow. I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

I agree with this.

I would never tell my supervisor or any higher-ups at work.

PunkMistress said:

psychodelicide said:

I suffer from depression too (have for awhile now). I made the mistake of telling my manager of the department where I worked that I was suffering from depression (not once did I tell him, but twice). He acted like a jerk about it, telling me, "Well, I know nothing at all about that. Take care of it". Yeah, thanks alot, wanker! Because I was depressed, my performance was not what it should have been. I showed up to work every day any way, because my boss did not like it when I called in sick.

When review time came around, this same manager gave me the worst review EVER in my 20+ years I have worked in Corporate America. He criticized and found fault with EVERYTHING that I did, even the way I organized my desk! Needless to say, I was so upset and angry by his "I don't give a shit" attitude, that I quit right there on the spot.

The point of this story is, I wouldn't be so quick to tell a manager at work if you suffer from depression. A lot of them just don't give a damn, and they just have a certain protocol for managing the people that are under them that they follow. I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

I agree with this.

I would never tell my supervisor or any higher-ups at work.

There are some things that a supervisor should not know.

psychodelicide said:

I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

I don't think this is a bitter analysis; it's just true. It's kind of the way things need to be, if you think about it. A boss is concerned with the way their company runs, they're not concerned with being a therapist. That doesn't mean they have to be a dick about it, but an employee's personal life really isn't any of their concern.

Even when it comes to my physical ailments, I don't ever give any detail to my supervisors. On the rare day that I have to call in, I simply tell them I'm sick. They don't need to know any more than that, and anything they do know can easily be used against you.

PunkMistress said:

psychodelicide said:

I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

I don't think this is a bitter analysis; it's just true. It's kind of the way things need to be, if you think about it. A boss is concerned with the way their company runs, they're not concerned with being a therapist. That doesn't mean they have to be a dick about it, but an employee's personal life really isn't any of their concern.

Even when it comes to my physical ailments, I don't ever give any detail to my supervisors. On the rare day that I have to call in, I simply tell them I'm sick. They don't need to know any more than that, and anything they do know can easily be used against you.

Exactly!!

psychodelicide said:

GirlBrother said:

I think the most important thing is telling other people; your friends, family, your manager at work...

Walking helps me too. I have no idea why, but it does.

I don't take medication. I tried to self-medicate with St. John's Wort tablets, but they made me worse.

I suffer from depression too (have for awhile now). I made the mistake of telling my manager of the department where I worked that I was suffering from depression (not once did I tell him, but twice). He acted like a jerk about it, telling me, "Well, I know nothing at all about that. Take care of it". Yeah, thanks alot, wanker! Because I was depressed, my performance was not what it should have been. I showed up to work every day any way, because my boss did not like it when I called in sick.

When review time came around, this same manager gave me the worst review EVER in my 20+ years I have worked in Corporate America. He criticized and found fault with EVERYTHING that I did, even the way I organized my desk! Needless to say, I was so upset and angry by his "I don't give a shit" attitude, that I quit right there on the spot.

The point of this story is, I wouldn't be so quick to tell a manager at work if you suffer from depression. A lot of them just don't give a damn, and they just have a certain protocol for managing the people that are under them that they follow. I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

i had no idea.

And I agree: bosses don't give a fuck.

Vendetta1 said:

psychodelicide said:

I suffer from depression too (have for awhile now). I made the mistake of telling my manager of the department where I worked that I was suffering from depression (not once did I tell him, but twice). He acted like a jerk about it, telling me, "Well, I know nothing at all about that. Take care of it". Yeah, thanks alot, wanker! Because I was depressed, my performance was not what it should have been. I showed up to work every day any way, because my boss did not like it when I called in sick.

When review time came around, this same manager gave me the worst review EVER in my 20+ years I have worked in Corporate America. He criticized and found fault with EVERYTHING that I did, even the way I organized my desk! Needless to say, I was so upset and angry by his "I don't give a shit" attitude, that I quit right there on the spot.

The point of this story is, I wouldn't be so quick to tell a manager at work if you suffer from depression. A lot of them just don't give a damn, and they just have a certain protocol for managing the people that are under them that they follow. I hate to say this, but a lot of bosses don't give a shit about what goes on in your personal life. They're only worried about whether you show up every day, and if you're doing your job to the best of your ability. Everything else means nothing to them (sorry to sound so bitter, but I'm still angry about this!)

i had no idea.

And I agree: bosses don't give a fuck.

TheVoid said:

blueblossom said:

I have been diagnosed with depression and am now on drugs. I have stress relating depression - it all got a bit too much for me at work, plus I suffered horrific pain again with kidney stones and its all had an impact.

Does anyone on here suffer with depression and what are you coping mechanisms - I have none at the moment - I just cry and give up - I have no fight left in me. My hair has agan started to fall out and the Dr says that it is all stress and I am not handling it well. What do I do to get better? I can't stay in this depressive hell hole but at the moment see no way out of.

OK, I'm going to sound like every damned book and internet website out there, but what I am saying IS FROM EXPERIENCE.

This absolutely works:

Try to do as many of these at the same time as possible.

1) exercise---I don't care HOW MUCH YOU DON'T WANT TO. Go exercise. Do something vigorous--not just the normal walk--do something that tires you out and makes you feel kind of weezy--like jogging, the gym, etc. After 2 weeks, you'll feel like a different person.

2) Force yourself to learn something challenging, like try to read a book as fast as you can, or learn a new language as fast as you can.

3) Once a week (on Saturday or Sunday) force yourself to go do something normal people do, like watch a movie (Even alone), or the beach....ANYTHING that normal people do. Going through the motions of a happy person helps.

4) Completely change your diet. Get rid of sugar and caffeine. Eat more bananas (yes, bananas--they are a mood food. THey help reduce depression).

5) Try to find a way to cry. Wether if it's be meditation (There are meditations for emotional release) or by watching a movie with emotional scenes. Cry your eyes out.

Basically, keep yourself busy.

I used to be seasonally depressed, but every fall, I hit the gym as hard as I can, and I no longer suffer from it.

That is some excellent advice!

blueblossom said:

I am indebted to you all talking about this subject. I sometimes thought that it is a silent suffering but I needed to shout it out that I am not well but because the illness has no obvious outward signs of illness (eg like a broken leg) only the mood swings, crying, and lethargy what do you say to people, it was only when I broken down crying at work that people started to realise that something was wrong. My GP said that I was ill and needed help (she even cuddled me because I was so low - what a great Dr). I have to see her in 2 weeks to see if the meds are kicking in and I have to see her every month after that. She said that I should have as much time off as I need. Talking with you here on the Org is wonderful - I do not think you realise how important you all are to me.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart....(here I go again...crying).!!

aw this made me tear up, cause it sounds exactly like what I was going through last year, and sometimes I still do go to the washroom to cry though it's not as bad as last year

Most larger companies have an EAP program or something to that effect. This may sound cruel, but an employer "employs" in order to get a job done, and if that job isn't being done for "whatever" reasons...that employer is well within thier right to take corrective action. They are not there to hold any of our hands, that's for our families, friends and other loved ones to do.

With that being said....employers are also human beings. I would think that as a human being one would try to refer their employee for the help that they needed, and back off and give them a little space and time to get themselves together. However, since depression is a disorder that can last a lifetime...it would be unreasonable to expect an employer to wait indefinitely for an employee to "bounce back". At some point "decisions" have to be made.

So no...I would not share with my employer that I had "depression" if I were in that predicament. But if I needed to take a few hours per week to go to therapy or whatever, I'd probably frame it in a way to suggest that I'm going for "grief" counseling. Which isn't really a lie because depression is grieving. People tend to be less judgemental about people who are grieving because everyone knows that they too can lose something or someone and need time and space to grieve. Some people can tend to "turn up their noses" at individuals suffering from depression.

The sad thing is that there are a lot of clinically depressed people walking around and functioning, and they have no idea that they are depressed. However, it is manifested in their actions and the way they treat themselves and other people.

Reel said:

Most larger companies have an EAP program or something to that effect. This may sound cruel, but an employer "employs" in order to get a job done, and if that job isn't being done for "whatever" reasons...that employer is well within thier right to take corrective action. They are not there to hold any of our hands, that's for our families, friends and other loved ones to do.

With that being said....employers are also human beings. I would think that as a human being one would try to refer their employee for the help that they needed, and back off and give them a little space and time to get themselves together. However, since depression is a disorder that can last a lifetime...it would be unreasonable to expect an employer to wait indefinitely for an employee to "bounce back". At some point "decisions" have to be made.

So no...I would not share with my employer that I had "depression" if I were in that predicament. But if I needed to take a few hours per week to go to therapy or whatever, I'd probably frame it in a way to suggest that I'm going for "grief" counseling. Which isn't really a lie because depression is grieving. People tend to be less judgemental about people who are grieving because everyone knows that they too can lose something or someone and need time and space to grieve. Some people can tend to "turn up their noses" at individuals suffering from depression.

The sad thing is that there are a lot of clinically depressed people walking around and functioning, and they have no idea that they are depressed. However, it is manifested in their actions and the way they treat themselves and other people.

Not all bosses are bad....when i finally got around to telling my new boss (last job) about my depression/anxieties i wasnt sure what his reaction would be....turned out his sister and daughter both suffer the same thing....

he was very understanding....id just have to say i was having a "bad day" and he would just leave me alone to get on with my work.

My anxieties manifested themself in my first job, where eventually i became agrophobic....i couldnt handle staff meetings without the "flight" instinct kicking in...eventually, i was pulled into the HR office, where i burst into tears....a visit to my GP put me on meds and onto a counsellor who helped me gain the skills to cope....

i will never be fully anxiety/depression free, it is a part of my chemical make up, but i have the coping mechanisims to help me realise when i am about to hit a rough patch, and i can seek help/talk about it...before it takes over.