Today I was at work and I had one of my most favorite clients come in... After we did her hair she turned to me with a smile on her face and graciously thanked me and told me how much she loved it!! with a smile she turned to me and gave me the biggest bear hug one could give another!! I with a smile returned her hug! I proceeded to walk back to the break room after she left and a co-worker of mine asks me doesn't that bother you when your clients give you hugs? I asked her why she would think so.. she said that when people hug her it makes her feel uncomfortable... Which got me thinking...

I was raised by my parents to be a lovie. What I mean by this is you did not leave the house without telling each other you love each other and without giving a hug or kiss... So as I grew up I was always even affectionate to my friends! I dont leave me friends houses without giving them a hug before I leave.. this has always been a part of my life...

So What I am wondering is maybe thats why my co-worker got irked by my client giving me a hug.. she was not raised to be lovie...

my dad was raised without his mom being very affectionate so when he met my mom who was raised to be lovie for a while it took him out of his element...

So my question to you all is..

were you raised to be a lovie/affectionate person?

Are you touchy feely to the ones you care about Friends/family/ect.

Or is it not a big part of your life and you can take it or leave it?

does it bother you when someone who is not a family member gives you a hug?

This thread is not to offend anyone I am just simply curious!
[Edited 4/9/10 10:15am]
[Edited 4/9/10 10:15am]

I was raised that way but not many people appreciate it, so that behavior has somewhat diminished.

Cinnie said:

yeah I hear you its a shame
[Edited 4/9/10 9:57am]
[Edited 4/9/10 9:57am]

insatiable3 said:

No

No

I definitely leave it

Yes, I don't like strangers touching me

Cinnie said:

Interesting, Cinnie. My experience has been the opposite...

I wasn't raised that way, but it seems that sort of contact is what my family and friends need most. It's a challenge now to provide that where it's needed.

insatiable3 said:

it's too bad. i used to love hugging people when saying goodbye. now i basically just save it for my mom and sisters.

My grandma and my mom are very affectionate people so I was raised that way.
I love to hug. I'd probably hug anybody

Lammastide said:

men generally think i am trying to be fresh, and women are confused by it.

so now i just leave them cold. a handshake is about as friendly as i get now.

where you raised to be a lovie/affectionate person?

Not really.

Are you touchy feely to the ones you care about Friends/family/ect.

No.

Or is it not a big part of your life and you can take it or leave it?

Actually prefer leave it.

does it bother you when someone who is not a family member gives you a hug?

Yes, I really dislike hugging (even people I know) so when someone I just met or barely know tries to hug me, I get really tense.

Cinnie said:

when we meet ur gonna effin hug me.
and if u dare stick ur hand out for a handshake, its over

where you raised to be a lovie/affectionate person?
not really...but that's the way it is at my house...I think it's important to tell or show somebody that you love how you feel...

Are you touchy feely to the ones you care about Friends/family/ect.
there are certain people that I know who are like that or dont mind it, there are others that do mind...it's not hard to adjust to folks...If I give enough of a damn to wanna be around them, I can accomodate to what makes them happy...

Or is it not a big part of your life and you can take it or leave it?
it's a big deal for me with my wife & kids...other than that, like I said before, I can adjust to whatever level of affection a person is comfortable with...

does it bother you when someone who is not a family member gives you a hug?
it's not a big deal...if it's genuine, I never mind...I dont' care who it is...it's not like people are hugging me every five minutes, there are way too many other things to be uncomfortable with to worry about a hug invading my private space...

DanceWme said:

I'm the same way I just love people so If they wanna throw me a hug Im greatful to throw one back

DanceWme said:

I think Cinnie looks like he'd give the best hugs, like, ever.

DanceWme said:

Thankfully I still get that reaction too Folks KNOW I wanna hug.

CarrieMPLS said:

Cinnie looks like he'd give some A.W.E.S.O.M.E. hugs... like he'd just devour a person.
[Edited 4/9/10 10:30am]

In general I'm not touchy feely overall, but I've gone through phases of being so over the years, depending on my friends and social group. I will say, it is the one big thing I miss about having a boyfriend. All of the good ones (some of them that I just casually dated, even) were quite cuddly and gave really good hugs.

I don't mind a hug as introduction to people, like, say, when you first meet an new orger. That kinda "stranger" is OK to hug.

I don't like being randomly hugged by coworkers or total strangers, though. That's just weird.

.
[Edited 4/9/10 10:24am]

I don't hug strangers but I definitely hug "brand new friends".

Im touchy feely with friends family and loved ones , but anyone I dont know is like that with me Im usually like get the fuck off me

i dont like to be touched

Cinnie said:

yea, not that many people appreciate good people. but don't let that stop you
from being one

CarrieMpls said:

yesssss

DanceWme said:

I was not raised around affectionate people (parents fought a lot) except my great grandmother. When she would watch me, my mom would say "don't pick her up and hold her, I do not want her to get spoiled".
The first thing my greatgmom would do when my mother left was pick me up and cuddle me. When I was an adult my Mom-Mom used to tell me what my mother said to her, it still made her mad.
My mom has a private invisible space around her that she lets very few into. I have found that I have the same around me.
I am not the touchy feely type towards ppl that I do not know.
Now that I have a baby, I am trying to give him the cuddles and affection that I did not get from my parents.
I want him to be cuddly, so far, it is not working.
He won't sleep in our bed with us nor will he let me rock him to sleep. He has been in his own bed, in his bedroom since he was 5 weeks.
I have been told that he gets his independence from me.

DanceWme said:

of course I do, but you gotta lean in first or I will assume

Nvncible1 said:

I used to hug everybody when i greated them. man, woman, alien.. who ever.

now i great male freinds with a firm handshake
and great my female freinds with a kiss on the cheek.

I HATE touchy people! Sorry, Had to get it out of my system. Why do people do it?

Cinnie said:

My niece came to visit me with a few of her friends a month or so ago. She's 19. After spending a few hours together shopping and such, one of the teenage boyfriends came up to me and gave me a big hug. They had all been fairly huggy all afternoon. It was cute.

it depends, i hugged this girl as in being friendly
my dog yes
family, relatives no
[Edited 4/9/10 11:20am]

My mo is not touchy, but I am...When I say I love you she says...most of the time...uh huh, yeah...whatever.
Hugging cousins and others is weird to me, but I don't mind people hugging me,,,I feel weary of men though.