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Printablepeb319 said: paintedlady said:  I am so sorry, I hate it when things like this happen.  thanks
yeah..it became different for me when i was the one watching and not being beaten i can't explain it..made me realize how dangerous he could be.. he literally picked my little brother up by his ears and slammed his head into the ceiling..he came after me the most,which was good in a way,kept him from bothering my brother and my sisters, one of which has epilepsy i used to play in my oldest sisers make up cuz she said i could, but i didnt get it all cleaned off before he got home one day..and he cleaned it off for me, with a steel wool pad..those metal scrubbing things.. the ONLY thing my mother said as he was about to start it was : 'oh be careful jack you might hurt her' 
i walked around with road rash on my face for a week.. but when people asked me what happened..i didnt lie for him..i think thats where i started growing strong,and developed my own set of right and wrong.. karma has kicked his ass around a bit, he's even been run over by a work truck and lived. 
and when my sister told me,thats what i did
so not nice, butt... I was lucky enough not to be hit... but my mom's boyfriend took it out on my younger brother, instead. 
My mother didn't allow her boyfriends to touch her girls but my poor brother. I am violent now, and I protect my kids. I can't imagine sleeping at night knowing my daughters skin was rubbed off her face by a man that claimed to love me. I would rather die first.
Your mom must have lived in such fear, that wasn't love and karma is real and God don't like ugly. Serves him right. | |
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booty said: oh ya once they know the r.ship is failing! yep
yep thanks its the type of shit im angry about cuz im trying to get away too [Edited 4/1/10 7:13am] Stay strong, do you have a safe place to go? I hope you get away soon, far away. | |
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paintedlady said: peb319 said: thanks
yeah..it became different for me when i was the one watching and not being beaten i can't explain it..made me realize how dangerous he could be.. he literally picked my little brother up by his ears and slammed his head into the ceiling..he came after me the most,which was good in a way,kept him from bothering my brother and my sisters, one of which has epilepsy i used to play in my oldest sisers make up cuz she said i could, but i didnt get it all cleaned off before he got home one day..and he cleaned it off for me, with a steel wool pad..those metal scrubbing things.. the ONLY thing my mother said as he was about to start it was : 'oh be careful jack you might hurt her'
i walked around with road rash on my face for a week.. but when people asked me what happened..i didnt lie for him..i think thats where i started growing strong,and developed my own set of right and wrong.. karma has kicked his ass around a bit, he's even been run over by a work truck and lived.
and when my sister told me,thats what i did
so not nice, butt... I was lucky enough not to be hit... but my mom's boyfriend took it out on my younger brother, instead.
My mother didn't allow her boyfriends to touch her girls but my poor brother. I am violent now, and I protect my kids. I can't imagine sleeping at night knowing my daughters skin was rubbed off her face by a man that claimed to love me. I would rather die first.
Your mom must have lived in such fear, that wasn't love and karma is real and God don't like ugly. Serves him right. Why???!!!! | |
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NastradumasKid said: paintedlady said: I was lucky enough not to be hit... but my mom's boyfriend took it out on my younger brother, instead.
My mother didn't allow her boyfriends to touch her girls but my poor brother. I am violent now, and I protect my kids. I can't imagine sleeping at night knowing my daughters skin was rubbed off her face by a man that claimed to love me. I would rather die first.
Your mom must have lived in such fear, that wasn't love and karma is real and God don't like ugly. Serves him right. Why???!!!! My mom dealt with the girls, she let him deal with her son. 
That man abused the hell out of m,y brother, when I turned 15, I was strong enough and me and my older sister got him out the house. We fought him, one of the many fights I would have defending my mom from her abusive boyfriends. That crap changes you as a person. When I see my mom being treated badly, I do a Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde transformation. I get straight evil... and I never regret it. Its my mom, and she is finally learning that I can't do that anymore, I have my own kids I need to be there for. So now she finally is alone, and more careful. I hope. | |
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NastradumasKid said: paintedlady said: I was lucky enough not to be hit... but my mom's boyfriend took it out on my younger brother, instead.
My mother didn't allow her boyfriends to touch her girls but my poor brother. I am violent now, and I protect my kids. I can't imagine sleeping at night knowing my daughters skin was rubbed off her face by a man that claimed to love me. I would rather die first.
Your mom must have lived in such fear, that wasn't love and karma is real and God don't like ugly. Serves him right. Why???!!!! i ask that...but you know..i really believe it wasnt fear so much as it was what she wanted.. he NEVER went after her... EVER.. it was me the most.. then my little brother..and there comes a point in all this where you dont get past the fact that she didnt protect any of us.. my little sister spent over 2 years in a foster home..the state wanted my mom to do one thing..make him leave the home..and she refused, that is..she just didnt do it.. she didnt seem to care or worry about it til the foster parents indicated they wanted to aadopt her..and the state was preparing to terminate parental rights on those grounds.. cuz she never made him leave and i still have no idea what it was about me that he seemed to hate so much.. he threatened me one time when i was 16.. and i told him i would kill him or die trying when i was 19 he punched me in the face... and i hit him back, and he pushed me.. i called the police, but of course my mom was there to make it seem so trivial..the cops thought it was a joke, so i told them to leave.. then my little brother found out about it..and his friends didnt take kindly to the bruise..i only wish he had been in his car when they shot it.... boy was he pissed!!
but he knew where it came from, he never attempted to hit me again but even when i visit my mom and we get to talking something we were half arguing bout in jest you know.. he started hollering and yelling at ME..telling me he would throw me out of his house   'why y'all trying to say goodbye? I didn't go anywhere, I'm right here, im all around you,always..'
in a line from my dream, I heard a voice and saw a silhouette in a chair.. | |
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peb319 said: NastradumasKid said: Why???!!!! i ask that...but you know..i really believe it wasnt fear so much as it was what she wanted.. he NEVER went after her... EVER.. it was me the most.. then my little brother..and there comes a point in all this where you dont get past the fact that she didnt protect any of us.. my little sister spent over 2 years in a foster home..the state wanted my mom to do one thing..make him leave the home..and she refused, that is..she just didnt do it.. she didnt seem to care or worry about it til the foster parents indicated they wanted to aadopt her..and the state was preparing to terminate parental rights on those grounds.. cuz she never made him leave and i still have no idea what it was about me that he seemed to hate so much.. he threatened me one time when i was 16.. and i told him i would kill him or die trying when i was 19 he punched me in the face... and i hit him back, and he pushed me.. i called the police, but of course my mom was there to make it seem so trivial..the cops thought it was a joke, so i told them to leave.. then my little brother found out about it..and his friends didnt take kindly to the bruise..i only wish he had been in his car when they shot it.... boy was he pissed!!
but he knew where it came from, he never attempted to hit me again but even when i visit my mom and we get to talking something we were half arguing bout in jest you know.. he started hollering and yelling at ME..telling me he would throw me out of his house That's very very horrible!!! You and your siblings didn't deserve that at all!!!! | |
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she wont go back to him, she just wants him to get the help he needs  After what he did to her and the kids !
She is also now pissed at me because I said something on facebook about it (didnt mention any names)..so i removed it Now i'd be a little upset too 
She said she's a big girl and she's over it...and I should get over it too Pardon me but WHAT THE FUCK??? Hopfuly she's just upset and didnt mean to snap at you, it happens 
Long time no see | |
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my sister shut the door on me and said "bye bye your nothing to me" then she gonna call me up after years later. my family is more dramatical though danm they just be calling me up outta no where. it's really nothing to talk about.
but ya sinse my brother died i got news on my brother that my other family didn't tell me about so. also theres alot of false info about what actually happened surrounding my brothers death. it's like too much dramma for me. so i've always been astranged to my family [Edited 4/2/10 6:23am] | |
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peb319 said: NastradumasKid said: Why???!!!! i ask that...but you know..i really believe it wasnt fear so much as it was what she wanted.. he NEVER went after her... EVER.. it was me the most.. then my little brother..and there comes a point in all this where you dont get past the fact that she didnt protect any of us.. my little sister spent over 2 years in a foster home..the state wanted my mom to do one thing..make him leave the home..and she refused, that is..she just didnt do it.. she didnt seem to care or worry about it til the foster parents indicated they wanted to aadopt her..and the state was preparing to terminate parental rights on those grounds.. cuz she never made him leave and i still have no idea what it was about me that he seemed to hate so much.. he threatened me one time when i was 16.. and i told him i would kill him or die trying when i was 19 he punched me in the face... and i hit him back, and he pushed me.. i called the police, but of course my mom was there to make it seem so trivial..the cops thought it was a joke, so i told them to leave.. then my little brother found out about it..and his friends didnt take kindly to the bruise..i only wish he had been in his car when they shot it.... boy was he pissed!!
but he knew where it came from, he never attempted to hit me again but even when i visit my mom and we get to talking something we were half arguing bout in jest you know.. he started hollering and yelling at ME..telling me he would throw me out of his house He went after you because he saw that you were strong in spirit and he needed to tear you down in order to feel accomplished in his agenda. He knew you are a pillar of strength in your family. You are the glue. You are the threat. I can see you are strong and beautiful, its easy to see and he didn't want others seeing it, he wants to destroy it. Fuck him. [Edited 4/2/10 7:29am] | |
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Thank u everyone  At the moment she is staying with friends and will be going into a womens shelter after that. He was arrested and then released on bail..I assume he is awaiting trial but she hasn't said. And to answer someones question...yes her children did see it, infact he went after them as well. Thankfully they were not hurt.
Just on a note though, he was NEVER controlling before the incident...not ever which makes it hard to understand why he flipped out like that. If he had been contolling or paranoid before this I would have told my sister I knew what was coming...but he wasnt. My father was controlling to my mother...accused her of cheating all the time (when it was him) and a huge drinker. There is a history in my family of violence toward women. NOt only was my father an abuser ( he nearly killed the woman he left my mother for) and I say *was* because he is no longer abusive but it took nearly killing his girlfriend to make him stop...His brother is an abuser and a murderer, who killed his mistress and beat his wife constantly. My Aunt (their sister) had a first husband that used to hit her also but she thankfully got rid of him. As far as my sister goes, childrens services are fully aware of whats going on, they are in contact with me and if she goes anywhere near him she will loose the children and she knows that. These days the law here will charge the Abuser whether the wife/girlfriend wants them to or not and there is an automatic restraining order put out, so if she turned around and went back to him she could be arrested as well. PRINCE IS WATCHING U  " When an Artist Creates, whatever they create belongs to society"
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chillichocaholic said: Thank u everyone
At the moment she is staying with friends and will be going into a womens shelter after that. He was arrested and then released on bail..I assume he is awaiting trial but she hasn't said. And to answer someones question...yes her children did see it, infact he went after them as well. Thankfully they were not hurt.
Just on a note though, he was NEVER controlling before the incident...not ever which makes it hard to understand why he flipped out like that. If he had been contolling or paranoid before this I would have told my sister I knew what was coming...but he wasnt. My father was controlling to my mother...accused her of cheating all the time (when it was him) and a huge drinker. There is a history in my family of violence toward women. NOt only was my father an abuser ( he nearly killed the woman he left my mother for) and I say *was* because he is no longer abusive but it took nearly killing his girlfriend to make him stop...His brother is an abuser and a murderer, who killed his mistress and beat his wife constantly. My Aunt (their sister) had a first husband that used to hit her also but she thankfully got rid of him. As far as my sister goes, childrens services are fully aware of whats going on, they are in contact with me and if she goes anywhere near him she will loose the children and she knows that. These days the law here will charge the Abuser whether the wife/girlfriend wants them to or not and there is an automatic restraining order put out, so if she turned around and went back to him she could be arrested as well. I hope all is well with her soon. Its great she is going to have a new lease on life. | |
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great it's glad there are places to protect us women out there... | |
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booty said: great it's glad there are places to protect us women out there...
I hope all is well with you too... I worry when I see/hear of women being abused. | |
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chillichocaholic said: Thank u everyone
At the moment she is staying with friends and will be going into a womens shelter after that. He was arrested and then released on bail..I assume he is awaiting trial but she hasn't said. And to answer someones question...yes her children did see it, infact he went after them as well. Thankfully they were not hurt.
Just on a note though, he was NEVER controlling before the incident...not ever which makes it hard to understand why he flipped out like that. If he had been contolling or paranoid before this I would have told my sister I knew what was coming...but he wasnt. My father was controlling to my mother...accused her of cheating all the time (when it was him) and a huge drinker. There is a history in my family of violence toward women. NOt only was my father an abuser ( he nearly killed the woman he left my mother for) and I say *was* because he is no longer abusive but it took nearly killing his girlfriend to make him stop...His brother is an abuser and a murderer, who killed his mistress and beat his wife constantly. My Aunt (their sister) had a first husband that used to hit her also but she thankfully got rid of him. As far as my sister goes, childrens services are fully aware of whats going on, they are in contact with me and if she goes anywhere near him she will loose the children and she knows that. These days the law here will charge the Abuser whether the wife/girlfriend wants them to or not and there is an automatic restraining order put out, so if she turned around and went back to him she could be arrested as well. Even if this is totally isolated, he should be bannished from her life FOREVER. What the hell is gonna stop another flipout? I wish your sister, the kids and your family all the love and light on planet earth to get through this 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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ya i called the police last night and made a report. i was just chilling and then he ganna corner me in my room. i was like wth " by law your not supposed to be here". ya im out i only came back to get my things. and its embarrasing to have police escort you into your house all the police did was defend him. and another thing ladies don't wait to make report cuz he hit me before now i have no proof he did that
ahhhh [Edited 4/5/10 18:56pm] | |
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Damn! I'm sorry your sister and her kids had to go through this. Totally unexusable on every level imaginable! I hope your sister keeps her word and stays the hell away from this idiot!  RIP, mom. I will forever miss and love you. | |
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y is everybody so mad now days we need 2 find god and embrace the love | |
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cbarnes3121 said: y is everybody so mad now days we need 2 find god and embrace the love
 People here aren't mad, people here on this thread are survivors of abuse. Most men that abuse women do it because they were abused themselves... they do it sometimes because they have control issues and are insecure, they use the excuse of anger ("you made me do it") to justify the abuse.
Honestly, the violence to me comes from deep rooted pain that's projected on to the victim, not anger. 
God bless and strengthen those that survive this situation. | |
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paintedlady said: cbarnes3121 said: y is everybody so mad now days we need 2 find god and embrace the love
People here aren't mad, people here on this thread are survivors of abuse. Most men that abuse women do it because they were abused themselves... they do it sometimes because they have control issues and are insecure, they use the excuse of anger ("you made me do it") to justify the abuse.
Honestly, the violence to me comes from deep rooted pain that's projected on to the victim, not anger.
God bless and strengthen those that survive this situation. Society does men no favors by encouraging and raising them to suppress their emotions and to act "like men". 2010: Healing the Wounds of the Past.... http://prince.org/msg/8/325740 | |
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SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: paintedlady said: People here aren't mad, people here on this thread are survivors of abuse. Most men that abuse women do it because they were abused themselves... they do it sometimes because they have control issues and are insecure, they use the excuse of anger ("you made me do it") to justify the abuse.
Honestly, the violence to me comes from deep rooted pain that's projected on to the victim, not anger.
God bless and strengthen those that survive this situation. Society does men no favors by encouraging and raising them to suppress their emotions and to act "like men".  This is why I am sooooo glad that I raised my kids alone. Their dad was a jerk in that way. They are all well adjusted and happy because of it.
My son is now 19 and more of a man than his father will ever be. He was allowed to express all his emotions as a child and now he is an effective communicator in all situations. :happymom: | |
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What the fuck?  | |
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paintedlady said:[quote] SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Society does men no favors by encouraging and raising them to suppress their emotions and to act "like men". This is why I am sooooo glad that I raised my kids alone. Their dad was a jerk in that way. They are all well adjusted and happy because of it.
My son is now 19 and more of a man than his father will ever be. He was allowed to express all his emotions as a child and now he is an effective communicator in all situations. :happymom:[/quote] we need an emote for that 
and congrats seems that i was busy doing something close to nothing, but different than the day before   | |
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prb said:[quote] paintedlady said: SupaFunkyOrgangrinderSexy said: Society does men no favors by encouraging and raising them to suppress their emotions and to act "like men". This is why I am sooooo glad that I raised my kids alone. Their dad was a jerk in that way. They are all well adjusted and happy because of it.
My son is now 19 and more of a man than his father will ever be. He was allowed to express all his emotions as a child and now he is an effective communicator in all situations. :happymom:[/quote] we need an emote for that
and congrats TY... my kids respect their dad, I taught them to always look up to their dad. Because he wasn't in my home w/ the kids he didn't get a chance to influence them. Thank God. So they don't really know him, they only know the positive stuff. This to me is a good thing. And yes we do need a :happymom: emote. | |
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OH MY GOD!!!!! She went back to him!!!!! I cant belive she went back to him!!! She paid fourty something dollars to have the charges dropped and has gone back. My younger sister told me she is now looking for people to take three of the 4 kids she has left living with her (she has 7 altogether but the younger two live with their dad and the oldest daughter lives with friends)
WTF!!!! I so badly want to take them, but living in a three bedroom house with 3 of my own children and Im also taking care of my youngest sisters baby until August means I have NO room...I just want to cry. Right as I type this in my head Im trying to figure out how I can possibly take at least two of them in because one of the oys can go and live with his father. Julio was already telling me he wanted custody of his son...Oh good lord PRINCE IS WATCHING U " When an Artist Creates, whatever they create belongs to society"
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chillichocaholic said: OH MY GOD!!!!! She went back to him!!!!! I cant belive she went back to him!!! She paid fourty something dollars to have the charges dropped and has gone back. My younger sister told me she is now looking for people to take three of the 4 kids she has left living with her (she has 7 altogether but the younger two live with their dad and the oldest daughter lives with friends)
WTF!!!! I so badly want to take them, but living in a three bedroom house with 3 of my own children and Im also taking care of my youngest sisters baby until August means I have NO room...I just want to cry. Right as I type this in my head Im trying to figure out how I can possibly take at least two of them in because one of the oys can go and live with his father. Julio was already telling me he wanted custody of his son...Oh good lord  | |
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chillichocaholic said: OH MY GOD!!!!! She went back to him!!!!! I cant belive she went back to him!!! She paid fourty something dollars to have the charges dropped and has gone back. My younger sister told me she is now looking for people to take three of the 4 kids she has left living with her (she has 7 altogether but the younger two live with their dad and the oldest daughter lives with friends)
WTF!!!! I so badly want to take them, but living in a three bedroom house with 3 of my own children and Im also taking care of my youngest sisters baby until August means I have NO room...I just want to cry. Right as I type this in my head Im trying to figure out how I can possibly take at least two of them in because one of the oys can go and live with his father. Julio was already telling me he wanted custody of his son...Oh good lord  RIP, mom. I will forever miss and love you. | |
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psychodelicide said: chillichocaholic said: OH MY GOD!!!!! She went back to him!!!!! I cant belive she went back to him!!! She paid fourty something dollars to have the charges dropped and has gone back. My younger sister told me she is now looking for people to take three of the 4 kids she has left living with her (she has 7 altogether but the younger two live with their dad and the oldest daughter lives with friends)
WTF!!!! I so badly want to take them, but living in a three bedroom house with 3 of my own children and Im also taking care of my youngest sisters baby until August means I have NO room...I just want to cry. Right as I type this in my head Im trying to figure out how I can possibly take at least two of them in because one of the oys can go and live with his father. Julio was already telling me he wanted custody of his son...Oh good lord well I spoke to childrens services today and they told me they are already taking some action and that they have already been informed she has gone back. Oh and get this u guys..apparently she is PREGNANT again!! I have offered to take the 6 year old (nelika) and 8 year old (dakota) and the 9 year old (Dustin) will be moving in wit his father Julio because I spoke to Julio today and he said my sister has already asked him to take his son. I will move some things around, put up another set of bunks and fit Nelika and Dakota in somehow. I am already an approved Foster carer so the Welfare worker said that will speed things up considerably. I'll keep y'all updated when I know more. PRINCE IS WATCHING U " When an Artist Creates, whatever they create belongs to society"
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chillichocaholic said: psychodelicide said: well I spoke to childrens services today and they told me they are already taking some action and that they have already been informed she has gone back. Oh and get this u guys..apparently she is PREGNANT again!! I have offered to take the 6 year old (nelika) and 8 year old (dakota) and the 9 year old (Dustin) will be moving in wit his father Julio because I spoke to Julio today and he said my sister has already asked him to take his son. I will move some things around, put up another set of bunks and fit Nelika and Dakota in somehow. I am already an approved Foster carer so the Welfare worker said that will speed things up considerably. I'll keep y'all updated when I know more. no words
good luck Chilli
 for the kids
for your sister
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chillichocaholic said: OH MY GOD!!!!! She went back to him!!!!! I cant belive she went back to him!!! She paid fourty something dollars to have the charges dropped and has gone back. My younger sister told me she is now looking for people to take three of the 4 kids she has left living with her (she has 7 altogether but the younger two live with their dad and the oldest daughter lives with friends)
WTF!!!! I so badly want to take them, but living in a three bedroom house with 3 of my own children and Im also taking care of my youngest sisters baby until August means I have NO room...I just want to cry. Right as I type this in my head Im trying to figure out how I can possibly take at least two of them in because one of the oys can go and live with his father. Julio was already telling me he wanted custody of his son...Oh good lord Awful situation, I pray she gets some counselling and hope she's not getting rid of her children to please this man? Perhaps she knows & accepts he's a total psycho and this is the only way she can think of to ensure her other kids are safe from him? One minute they want peace……
Then do everything to make it go away.  | |
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What?
I don't even know what to say. MyeternalgrattitudetoPhil&Val.Herman said "We want sweaty truckers at the truck stop! We want cigar puffing men that look like they wanna beat the living daylights out of us" Val"sporking is spooning with benefits" | |
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