I was thinking more about my signature today, and I was curious if others have found this to be true as well?

Why is it that women will say one thing when talking to you and then turn around and say bad things about you to everyone else and try to gain support for their views when they feel threatened or rejected?

I have not found this to be true with men. Men will most often times tell it like it is, and to your face. They will not talk about you behind your back.

Because woman are shifty, conniving bitches.

Men aren't smart enough to b shifty, conniving bitches.

I agree Azurestar, Some women are like this. Fortunately I have female freinds that are always honest with me, I don't waste my time with people like this. It saps your energy.

Nep2nes said:

Oh, we are smart enough... but we prefer the upfront approach to backstabbing someone or trying to drain their blood slowly...

The same type of behavior can be seen in female murderers... they are usually poisoners rather than mutilators... there is something diablolical about poisoning someone over a period of time until they die. These women act lovey dovey while they are murdering... the same can be said for their backstabbing in personal situations.

Lleena said:

Yes, it does do just that. I think that my experience with women has left me jaded and cautious. Regarding honesty, male friends have never let me down, while women have turned on me faster than I could blink. Recently, and even today, in fact, my point was once again proved so it brought it to mind...



.
[This message was edited Tue Sep 24 14:04:30 PDT 2002 by AzureStar]

IceNine said:

Female murderers are not very creative.

Nep2nes said:

Not all women are like you. In fact, most of them are quite pleasant, I've found. You give them a bad name, and then try to say that they're all like you.

AaronForever said:

I don't know Aaron...

AzureStar said:

I have had female freinds who have done just that, so I know how it feels. Sad but true It's always a shock to find out that someone whom you thought of as a freind could be so mean, but doesn't have the gumption to tell you in person. We live and learn !! try not to let it get you down!

Nep2nes said:

sooo does that mean a snitch is really a crafty veteran of the game, instead of a spineless rat
that knows it doesn't have a chance in the real world???
and aint my spellin gittin bettah???
[This message was edited Tue Sep 24 14:15:12 PDT 2002 by 00769BAD]

AzureStar said:

I think that your sig reinforces a stereotype that women are catty. I don't like it. Yes, some are. But, then, at least they're nice to your face.

AaronForever said:

I always think just meeting her friends is a good indication of how much a pain in the ass she'll be. If you can't stand her friends, try to sleep with them, and then break up with your chick pronto.

I found that saying to be true. And

Not all of us are this way Azure! I can assure you that I would be upfront, and almost hurtingly honest with you...stab you in the back, never! That is not my way.

Maybe it is my belief in "karma"

Nep2nes said:

Sounds like a personal problem...

sag10 said:

Oh, Sag... I know. I was not saying all women are this way. Just the vast majority that I, personally, have come into contact with. In my experience, male friends are much more honest than female friends, and less likely to go behind your back.

I know you would be hurtingly honest with me, and I love you for that!!

AzureStar said:

You know what baby gurl, it is because you are so beautiful. Jealousy is a very nasty word.

And yes men are very good friends, and don't you have one that you are missing?

Told you I would be honest!


oops
[This message was edited Tue Sep 24 14:48:38 PDT 2002 by sag10]

I think that it actually depends upon the person. I've known some beautiful women, who truly care about others and strive always to show that caring and love everyday. I've also known some men who would rather knock a women flat and put her down rather than appreciate the gentle beauty of that woman. Everyone has the choice to be loving, only some rise to that challenge.

InfinitiesHeaven said:

Oh you! Of course it depends on the person... from experience though, I've met three female friends, in all of my 31 years - that number not counting my mother who is the BEST! You are included in that number. You have truly been a light at my never ending tunnel of darkness.

Men... well... compared to the countless number of women who have done me wrong, there are only two - and that wasn't backstabbing, that was disrespect.



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[This message was edited Tue Sep 24 17:46:43 PDT 2002 by AzureStar]

I think men are more likely to be physically brutal with women, whereas other women tend to be psychologically/emotionally focused with their negative intentions...

I have experienced both men and women talking badly about me behind my back. However, I think when women stop befriending other women in favor of men instead of trying to work through it, it reinforces stereotypes of both genders.

AnotherLoverHolenYoHead said:

Well said!

Azure- I find it disheartening that you've known so many horrible women! Luckily for me, I come from a family of fairly strong women. My mother has 4 sisters, and they're all as close as can be. I've been fortunate to have great women friends for most of my life, but I know that's not the case for everyone. I've also had my days of hanging out with mainly guys. It's just a different type of friendship for me, that's all.

I have a girlfriend who has admitted to me she never really feels close to or can be good friends with other women. For her it's the whole competition routine. (I personally think this is more a reflection on her than the women she's met, just cause I know her, but then, she also lost her mother early in life, so go figure.)

Most guys find it hard to be friends with women... we like to fuck and we want to fuck... being friends with a woman is often times a ploy to try to fuck them. I have known many guys who were "friends" with women and went on to fuck them because that was their real intention in the first place.

Now that can be a good thing if the guy gets along really well with the woman and they end up being lovers, but most times it ends up in a mess because it ruins the friendship. They decide not to fuck anymore but their relationship is not the same afterwards and they go their separate ways.

I think that women CAN be good friends to other women, but they end up trying to fuck each other over when a guy comes into the picture or if they feel jealous for any reason.

Guys are friends with other guys and we are not jealous of each other... we don't give a half a fuck about any emotional crap between us and we don't pry into each other's private lives... we are shallow pricks.

CAVEAT: This is just my opinion, your mileage may vary.

AnotherLoverHolenYoHead said:

Well, that could be true. I guess I was talking more about friendship than anything else. I haven't had a male friend, or a female friend ever try to physically harm me.

I have never experienced, to my knowledge, a male friend talking about me behind my back. That is just my experience. Women, however, in my experience, do it frequently and without shame.

I do relate totally to women ceasing a friendship because of a man. I don't know, I was talking more about a person claiming to be your friend to your face, while behind your back they say not so savory things about you... sometimes, even in front of you when they think you won't catch on.

I'm done rambling now...

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[This message was edited Tue Sep 24 18:21:00 PDT 2002 by AzureStar]

IceNine said:

LOL, this reminds me of the conversation in When Harry Met Sally where they discuss whether or not men and women can really be friends...

Of course that quote can apply in many cases... unfortunately... it doesn't reflect humanity in it's best moments... but it happens... there is no denying that.

However it's not the belief I like to hold... I don't want to have to expect that from woman, I don't want to feel I cannot trust them, based on the possibility they have the potential to be vindicitive in that way. I just think if I held that expectation as a rule... I would probably find a way to validate it by subconsciously choosing friends that would do that to me... life can be strange that way.

I think we have all experienced it to one degree or another... but I've been blessed enough to find quite a few female friends whos self-esteem is strong enough not to feel they have to bring me down to feel better about themselves... yea, those are the friends you have to hold on to..

But there's nothing wrong necessarily with having a little skepticism I guess... if it keeps you from being hurt... however I wouldn't want it to make me cynical to the point where I didn't allow myself to fully trust my female friends... I'd feel I was robbing myself of a relationship that can be truly beautiful... It really is disappointing when woman or men resort to those kinds of tactics in order to fulfill their own agendas... we just have to rise above it AzureStar and be stronger for it... I suspect many of the woman who have done this to you hon were feeling inferior about themselves... it's so often more about them than it is ever about the person they are criticizing...

AzureStar said:

Well, I guess it's that I have 3 brothers and have heard them and their friends talk shit. I also had my own particular experiences with male "friends" (much like what IceNine describes above, as far as how "real" the friendship was). I've also experienced women betraying me. Betrayal is betrayal, regardless of gender. I find it unfortunate to label behaviors by gender, although obviously there are some things that are biologically predominant. But saying most women aren't good, trustworthy friends would be like me saying (if I'd been raped/beaten by a man) that most men are violent rapists. Perhaps that's been my personal experience, but I cannot generalize and live my life according to that generalization or I close off a great number of potentially wonderful relationships...

I am just jaded.

Nep2nes said:

Nep2nes, I think your avowed feminism is a bunch of crap--your real agenda is just plain anti-male...

AnotherLoverHolenYoHead said:

VERY well said.

AnotherLoverHolenYoHead said:

Indeed ...