O.K. I have been advised to try this with my daughter. She is a good girl with everyone else except me. With me she's the bad seed. I think the problem is me. Anyway we now have a family therapist and she has recomended that I try this.

Anyone try it?

What is it?

oh yes...I have the book. Sometimes it works for me...I will combine the countdown with the stank eye to let the kid know it's on

1,2,3, Beat Dat Azz also works for me....

OH! You mean the old, "I'm gonna count to 3 and if you're not here before 3 you're in BIG trouble" line?

If so, works like a charm for me.

BklynBabe said:

That was the version my mom always used.

Works for me pretty much every time.

Is that the one where you hide a baby in a top hat and pull it out later to impress your friends?

Ruined my top hat.

BklynBabe said:

Today's kids are missing the threat of a good old fashioned ass whoopin'

BklynBabe said:

I've never heard of that magic thing, but 1, 2, 3, beat that ass was my standby when my children were young. I RARELY got to 3.

It STILL works on my 13-year-old daughter, so it IS magic!

HELLA WORKS!!! Especially if you follow the instructions... it's not really just about 1,2,3...

My kids both know that if I get to 2, life will be getting VERY difficult in no uncertain terms!

It definitely works.
And just to keep things fun, I won't count at the same speed -- or even a steady speed -- everytime. Screws her head up!

BklynBabe said:

It works. I used this with my oldest son (except I gave him to a count of 5). I stumbled on it by accident one day when I had asked him to clean his room. I just started counting and by the time I made it to 4, I guess he decided he didn't want to find out what it would mean if I reached 5. I really had no clue what I was going to do if I ever reached 5, and neither did he, but luckily he never wanted to find out. If I had reached 5, I would have probably stood there with a dumb look on my face of "Now what?" and the magic would have been lost.

My oldest is 24 and my two youngest are 8 and 6, and I use counting with them as well. My 8 year old son has never let me reach 3 before doing what he needs to do, but my 6 year old daughter? She's come close. When I start counting she will stare at me defiantly until I'm ready to start saying 5 and then she is on her way. I have a feeling that she will be my first child to test the magic. I need to come up with a plan quick!

Spanking is out of the question. I tried spanking my oldest once and he spent the next 3 weeks laughing about it. But lectures!? Oh lectures I can do. When I would get in lecture mode with my oldest, he would beg me to spank him because then it would be over. He even offered to go pick a switch a couple of times and let me use it if I would stop lecturing.

Genesia said:

Your mom counted all the way to 3???

johnart said:

Actually, no. We knew we didn't have 'til 3. On three, she was movin' - so we better disappear by 2.

PunkMistress said:

My dad didn't bother with the counting.

BklynBabe said:

You are crazy and funny as hell!!

The book said that your not suppose to say much or get emotional. Basically if they see that they have gotten you angry they feel like they have some sort of power.

So beating their butts can't work at the same time as 1.2.3. Magic.


"Beat Dat Azz" as you say worked wonders for my mother who raised us before there was such a thing as the Department of Children and Families.

It went like this.
This was 1
This was 2

this was 3


Three ment "I can not believe that you went to 3."
I had maybe 30 seconds at that point to stop what I was doing and appologize like my life depended on it.

Should I dawdle a second longer she would fix her eyes on me like an eagle on a bunny rabbit and down she's come with her tallons digging into my shoulders or the back of my neck.. I would be dragged to a suitable place to be shredded to pieces.

Mother was one of 11 children and my grandefather had over 40 grandechilren. They would come to his house on holidays, all of us, and they'd just tear up the place. They'd be in his closets and draws etc. Meanwhile my mothers three kids would be sitting on the couch like kids from a 50's sitcom.
My grandefather said " there IS something wrong with YOUR kids" Mome was effective LONG after we turned 18

O.K now for my little princess.
The therapist said that I am afraid to be a parent.
When she was 4 she refused to get into the car to go to headstart. This went on for an hour. Finally she ran into the bushes. I grabbed her arm, got her out put her in the car and headed to Head Start.
An hour later I got a call, Seems it hurt her to put her jacket on. I was written up. I brought her to the emergency room. She had nursemaids elbow. That means that her elbow came out of it's socket and the doc just twisted it to put it back in. She also had a tiny scratch on the side of her eye from the bushes.
The DCF worker came. She said no problem and a case was not opened.

Now I am afraid of taking things out of her hand for fear that I may "hurt" her or scratch her etc. She'll grab my cell phone (which plays TV shows that we don't get at home) and not give the phone back for hours.


I took it away from her once and she proceeded to break about 6 glass things. The new therapist said if she does it again call 911 !!!!!

Now if the child is never in the principals office at school, and my sister only has a minimum of resistance then she must be capable of stabalizing herself without going to an emergency room.

So here we are doing 1.2.3. magic. There is not anything yet on biting, glass throwing kids that I can see yet. They say put her in her room for 5 minutes. I will be dragging that 55 pound girl in there over and over again. This all should have been done at least 4 years ago or 6 years ago!!!!!

It's weird to be afraid of your own kid. I am kinda in that space.

RenHoek said:

With my father, if it got to one, I knew I done fucked up. My brother's the same way with his kids.

uPtoWnNY said:

now, one complaint to your teacher and down they come to take your kids away. My mother NEVER hit us just because she was having a hard day. Of course if she was having a hard day you were doomed if you broke a rule.

Deadflow3r said:

I know you did not mean to hurt her!

But she can't throw glass either....she might get hurt a different way and you will till feel sad. Or if she didn't listen and ran into the street.

Children are extremely perceptive and pick up when you are afraid....and then they tend to run with it. I'd rather my kid be afraid of me, though, and safe, than he thinks I'm afraid of him and does whatever he pleases.

Gurl, I've done ALL sorts of things with him....but I do know one thing when I say boo....that lil fucka jump a mile high like "oh snap, she serious now!"

Deadflow3r said:

Dead on!

counting helps ME calm down....

Good luck

prb said:

Counting gives me time to go get what I need. I do try not to be one of those shoe throwing types of parents. I save that for the cat!

BklynBabe said:

im glad you winked after the cat comment

Counting gives the time to take a breath...and get the thoughts together..as in, do i really want the grief that will follow if i do get to three...
Ie: ban puter usage etc.

I never used to follow thru with the threats, but i do now...they do work.

Great example was when the rugrat wouldnt clean his room, so i said he couldnt watch the Dr who special on tele the next night....he got so upset i thought he was going to have a panic attack!!!!

Once he calmed down, i said, if you clean your room in the morning, i will think about letting him watch it.
Next morning(sunday) he was up with the birds....

i let him sweat on my decision for a little while
Let him watch his show, but as he hadnt done what i wanted in the first place, he lost his DS/computer for a week.

Now he knows that i WILL follow thru if necessary.

I am still working this. The therapist came over. Great beginning. Suddenly the therapist started to talk about reading. That's a tough subject for my daughter. my daughter wanted the discussion to end but it continued. She got under the table and began biting me. I reminded her she would loose her 50 cents for the day if she got to 3, she told me " i don't care then continued. What a mess. She ran out to the front of the house which is near a busy street and refused to at least go to the back yard. They don't want me to do what my mother would have done which is drag her ass to where my mother told her to go. Anyway, this modern parenting ain't easy. I agree with you BklynBabe, when kids are frightened of their parent at least they are safe.

Deadflow3r said:

Wait a minute. Your daughter started biting you in front of the therapist?! What the heck did the therapist do/say?

I guess I have to wait until the little man can count to 3 before I can start this.

MrsMdiver said:

Actually, my mom never even counted. She just gave us the "death stare."

<--- I and my three sisters