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Thread started 03/10/10 7:06pm

TotalANXiousNE
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Newestdumb dilema

Now this dumb guy I had over sat nite. Really nice n stuff. Don't like him. Basically just hung out wit him to shut my friend n her husband up .

Well he was like obsessed I mean OBSESSED wit my kids. Sonrhats one of 2 things.....either he thinks that'll earn him points, or he's a mollester.

So I didn't even invite him to my sons bday party n he keeps
Txtn me all day tellin me hoe he got Noah me n daisy presents n can't wait till his party.....WTF??
Plus my x cheating bf is gonna be there n it's the first time I'm seeing him since the fall out.

Ewy
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #1 posted 03/10/10 7:09pm

FauxReal

He's probably trying to earn points. I see friends do this shit all the time, especially the ones that have never had children, go way over the top in trying to get acquainted with them.

But you know...look him up on the sex offender registry just in case.
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Reply #2 posted 03/10/10 7:14pm

TotalANXiousNE
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FauxReal said:

He's probably trying to earn points. I see friends do this shit all the time, especially the ones that have never had children, go way over the top in trying to get acquainted with them.

But you know...look him up on the sex offender registry just in case.


Ya he doesn't have kids.

I dunno

This dude is not taking no for an answer he's been harrassing me nonstop snce sat. It's really lame n if it wasn't for him being a friend of a friend I woulda told him to lose my number by now
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #3 posted 03/10/10 7:17pm

FauxReal

TotalANXiousNESS said:

FauxReal said:

He's probably trying to earn points. I see friends do this shit all the time, especially the ones that have never had children, go way over the top in trying to get acquainted with them.

But you know...look him up on the sex offender registry just in case.


Ya he doesn't have kids.

I dunno

This dude is not taking no for an answer he's been harrassing me nonstop snce sat. It's really lame n if it wasn't for him being a friend of a friend I woulda told him to lose my number by now


Well being a friend of a friend he probably knows you're just getting out of a relationship, thus presumably vulnerable, so maybe he thinks this is his biggest window of opportunity and is trying a little too hard to capitalize on it. I dunno, just a thought.
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Reply #4 posted 03/10/10 7:25pm

Vendetta1

Sweetie, don't have this dude around your kids, period.
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Reply #5 posted 03/10/10 7:25pm

TotalANXiousNE
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FauxReal said:

TotalANXiousNESS said:



Ya he doesn't have kids.

I dunno

This dude is not taking no for an answer he's been harrassing me nonstop snce sat. It's really lame n if it wasn't for him being a friend of a friend I woulda told him to lose my number by now


Well being a friend of a friend he probably knows you're just getting out of a relationship, thus presumably vulnerable, so maybe he thinks this is his biggest window of opportunity and is trying a little too hard to capitalize on it. I dunno, just a thought.


Ohio believe it. N my friend I'd reallllly pissinme off

Ugh
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #6 posted 03/10/10 7:27pm

FauxReal

Gotta agree with what vendetta said.

Worst case scenario, he's a pervert like you mentioned.

Best case scenario he's someone you don't want to spend time around like that anyway, so it's probably best to not let the kids form an attachment because it's kind of unfair to them, IMO.

Then there's all the little scenarios in between, none of which scream out "Keep this guy around".
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Reply #7 posted 03/10/10 7:35pm

drgnfly

.....

hmmmm edit
[Edited 3/10/10 19:49pm]
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Reply #8 posted 03/10/10 7:52pm

Acrylic

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Vendetta1 said:

Sweetie, don't have this dude around your kids, period.


yeahthat
batting eyes ACRYLIC batting eyes
I do nothing professionally.
I only do things for fun.

johnart: Acrylic's old bras is where tits of all sizes go to frolic after they die. Tit Heaven.
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Reply #9 posted 03/10/10 8:41pm

RenHoek

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moderator

Vendetta1 said:

Sweetie, don't have this dude around your kids, period.


oh you ARE good aren'tcha...

See you in SF??
A working class Hero is something to be ~ Lennon
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Reply #10 posted 03/11/10 2:23am

TotalANXiousNE
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I agree stymie.

If I learned ANYTHING in the last few months it's go wit ur gut!
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #11 posted 03/11/10 2:31am

Ottensen

TotalANXiousNESS said:

either he thinks that'll earn him points, or he's a mollester.Ewy.


GURRL, that is your intuition speaking right there. Don't have that dude around your kids, period.
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Reply #12 posted 03/11/10 2:34am

Ottensen

TotalANXiousNESS said:

FauxReal said:

He's probably trying to earn points. I see friends do this shit all the time, especially the ones that have never had children, go way over the top in trying to get acquainted with them.

But you know...look him up on the sex offender registry just in case.


Ya he doesn't have kids.

I dunno

This dude is not taking no for an answer he's been harrassing me nonstop snce sat. It's really lame n if it wasn't for him being a friend of a friend I woulda told him to lose my number by now


Oh hay-ell no. You need to lose him like, yesterday. No taking chances where the babies are concerned, Mamacita!
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Reply #13 posted 03/11/10 2:40am

HamsterHuey

TotalANXiousNESS said:

If I learned ANYTHING in the last few months


The first new things you need to learn is DON'T LET SOMEONE INTO YOUR HOME ON A FIRST DATE and DON'T DO ANYTHING YOU DON'T WANNA DO!

Like, wtf kind of friends do you have that they pressurize you into doing stuff you are uncomfortable with? And what kinda person are you that you let them?

This entire situation had not been here if you had just gone with your gut feeling in the FIRST place.

Anyways. Congrats with the b-day! Why is creepy ex-bf coming over?
>>
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Reply #14 posted 03/11/10 2:43am

HamsterHuey

Plus, I think you need a stickie called OMG WHAT DID I DO NOWWWW? razz
>>
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Reply #15 posted 03/11/10 3:04am

purplehippieon
the1

Yikes! It seems odd that after you've recently broken up with the old dude who cheated on you, that your friends would set you up with some creepy guy like that. Who the hell invites himself to a b-day party of the son of a woman he just got to know?
And with the cheater coming to the party and maybe even the creepy dude, it just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. disbelief
It sucks that there are so many weirdos in your life right now.

And I agree with what HamsterHuey said before. nod
[Edited 3/11/10 3:14am]
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Reply #16 posted 03/11/10 3:39am

TotalANXiousNE
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Rite rite X 4

Thanks guys.

Ppl in general need to lemme alone n I need to be more blunt
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #17 posted 03/11/10 3:49am

HamsterHuey

TotalANXiousNESS said:

I need to be more blunt


Just be clear to others on what you don't want. To me it seems your 'no' in the story of your friends setting you up with a guy wasn't loud enough. If they keep pressurising, tell them you don't like what they're doing.
If you feel like your comfortzone is being trampled on, tell them you feel pressured and that you don't like it. But thank them for taking an interest.

And with the guy that invited himself; you immediately should have asked where he got the impression that he was invited. Being clear is what saves you from warped perceptions and expectations.

Sure, it can come across as bitchy and harsh, but it keeps away conversations that spiral into zones even more uncomfortable.
>>
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Reply #18 posted 03/11/10 4:02am

IAintTheOne

How about some time for yourself to get you together 1st. Maybe think about going to school getting some kind of education. No I am not ripping on you but it seems like you jump out of the frying pan and into the fire constantly. Think about you and your kids 1st damn.
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Reply #19 posted 03/11/10 4:08am

Ottensen

HamsterHuey said:

TotalANXiousNESS said:

I need to be more blunt


Just be clear to others on what you don't want. To me it seems your 'no' in the story of your friends setting you up with a guy wasn't loud enough. If they keep pressurising, tell them you don't like what they're doing.
If you feel like your comfortzone is being trampled on, tell them you feel pressured and that you don't like it. But thank them for taking an interest.

And with the guy that invited himself; you immediately should have asked where he got the impression that he was invited. Being clear is what saves you from warped perceptions and expectations.

Sure, it can come across as bitchy and harsh, but it keeps away conversations that spiral into zones even more uncomfortable.


Your advice is so on point!
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Reply #20 posted 03/11/10 4:18am

HamsterHuey

Ottensen said:

Your advice is so on point!


Thanks. I must admit that this kind of advice only stems from experience; in being clear about your feelings you have to hurt some people, but it is better in the long run. You only get there once you reach the "and now it's enough"-stage.
>>
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Reply #21 posted 03/11/10 6:07am

TotalANXiousNE
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Can I just say that I seriously love all you guys.

You guys are like one of my soul motivations, peop talkers whatever ya would call it, rite now.

You say exactly what I feel, and what I know I SHOULD be doing.

Don't get impatient with me. I know you're all rite.

Thanks.

grouphug

So heres what I did:

Heres the exact messages from last nite, he kept txtn me n I wasnt answering.

R: you still there??

Me: Ya I'm just really busy rite now. You seem nice and all. I just really wanna be alone.

R: Thats not a nice way of saying no, is it?

(This is this morning now)

Me: I'm just being honest that I don't wanna deal wit any guys AT ALL rite now.

R: Wow. It sounds like you really got screwed over. I'm sorry to hear that. I thought we could have something nice.

.....Wtf I met this guy ONCE n barely looked at him let alonce talked to him.

Me: I'm just totally not looking for anything at all rite now.

R: Ok good luck. Sorry to bother you.


I didn't respond. Just leave it at that rite????
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #22 posted 03/11/10 6:30am

thejason

he's a weirdo...unsolicited gifts for children mean one thing...

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Reply #23 posted 03/11/10 6:33am

thejason

and don't respond to anymore of his lame texts, he obviously can't take a hint...
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Reply #24 posted 03/11/10 6:38am

TotalANXiousNE
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thejason said:

he's a weirdo...unsolicited gifts for children mean one thing...




OMG.
In all seriousness that is just making me sick to my stomach.
Ok, then I'm not a paranoid freak it's weird.

Maybe the guy just really likes kids but I'm not taking any chances.
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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Reply #25 posted 03/11/10 6:38am

drgnfly

ever heard of blocking calls wink it works really well
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Reply #26 posted 03/11/10 6:45am

TotalANXiousNE
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HamsterHuey said:

TotalANXiousNESS said:

If I learned ANYTHING in the last few months


The first new things you need to learn is DON'T LET SOMEONE INTO YOUR HOME ON A FIRST DATE and DON'T DO ANYTHING YOU DON'T WANNA DO!

Like, wtf kind of friends do you have that they pressurize you into doing stuff you are uncomfortable with? And what kinda person are you that you let them?

This entire situation had not been here if you had just gone with your gut feeling in the FIRST place.

Anyways. Congrats with the b-day! Why is creepy ex-bf coming over?



His kids are really close with my kids....I'm close wit his kids, he's close wit mine. They've been at all of eachothers parties for like the last 5 yrs. We were neighbors, member?
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
  - E-mail - orgNote - Report post to moderator
Reply #27 posted 03/11/10 7:34am

Ottensen

TotalANXiousNESS said:

Can I just say that I seriously love all you guys.

You guys are like one of my soul motivations, peop talkers whatever ya would call it, rite now.

You say exactly what I feel, and what I know I SHOULD be doing.

Don't get impatient with me. I know you're all rite.

Thanks.

grouphug

So heres what I did:

Heres the exact messages from last nite, he kept txtn me n I wasnt answering.

R: you still there??

Me: Ya I'm just really busy rite now. You seem nice and all. I just really wanna be alone.

R: Thats not a nice way of saying no, is it?

(This is this morning now)

Me: I'm just being honest that I don't wanna deal wit any guys AT ALL rite now.

R: Wow. It sounds like you really got screwed over. I'm sorry to hear that. I thought we could have something nice.

.....Wtf I met this guy ONCE n barely looked at him let alonce talked to him.

Me: I'm just totally not looking for anything at all rite now.

R: Ok good luck. Sorry to bother you.


I didn't respond. Just leave it at that rite????


EXACTLY!!! RUNNNNN, Girl, RUNNNNN! He gave you an out: TAKE IT. shake
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Reply #28 posted 03/11/10 7:40am

HamsterHuey

TotalANXiousNESS said:

We were neighbors, member?


Nah, I missed that.

Well, that's something you have to get used to; bumping into your BIG ASS MISTAKE every now and then.
>>
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Reply #29 posted 03/11/10 7:44am

TotalANXiousNE
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HamsterHuey said:

TotalANXiousNESS said:

We were neighbors, member?


Nah, I missed that.

Well, that's something you have to get used to; bumping into your BIG ASS MISTAKE every now and then.



I'm plenty used to it. lol
I've reached in darkness and come out with treasure
I layed down with love and I woke up with lies
Whats it all worth only the heart can measure
It's not whats in the mirror but what's left inside
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