THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
Thursday, March 4th 2010, 11:32 AM


WASHINGTON – John Pilkington's boss wouldn't take no for an answer.
During more than two years as a food runner at an upscale steakhouse in Scottsdale, Ariz., Pilkington says his male supervisor groped, fondled and otherwise sexually harassed him more than a dozen times.
"It was very embarrassing," Pilkington said. "I felt like I had to do something because the situation was just so bad."

read more: http://www.nydailynews.co...z0hGFaiYnM

Great! Now the tables are turned!

The female population gets a break.

yet if he was playing baseball or football it would considered male bonding behavior....

luv4u said:

Two wrongs always make a right!



If you think that men in power have now suddenly begun to victimize men as well as (or as you stated instead of) women you're very naive. This type of abuse has always happened it's just that finally men are speaking up about it.

It's about time.

I've seen this at work many times, but seldom blatantly.

The few times that I did see it blatantly, the guy was more or less intimately familiar with his boss (maybe not sexual, but they definitely had a long history).

But it's always been more acceptable for women to say things about men which if the tables were flipped would completely make women feel very uncomfortable. I can't tell you how many times I've heard, 'UGH... men!' or 'He's just being a man.' or even, "Men are useless.'
All of those things, to me are harmless, considering how hostile the environment is to women even today in the workplace (for example, in the IT world if a woman says ANYTHING about a subject, there's an 80% chance the men in the room will wait for a second person, namely a 'man' to either affirm or rebuke her statement--what she says is never taken as legitimate until a man confirms it...Folks aren't even aware this happens. I am, because they do it to me as a minority all the time too.).

But what I think you're seeing now is a power structure change (which is a good thing). My last 3 bosses have been women. To men, it was relatively harmless when harassment was a peer or a someone underneath you. But now that women are often in charge of men, and female peers have the power to influence your own career, men are starting to demand the same 'respect' women have always demanded themselves.



The topic of sexual harassment and political correctness came up at work a few weeks back, and I remember someone saying, "Pretty soon, you're going to end having to talke like a robot. I mean, you can't say ANYTHING out of line anymore." I'm thinking.... erm.... That's why it's called 'work' fool.

It's wrong. Period.

Lammastide said:

yes, it is wrong...period. Yet maybe men will begin to realize just how WRONG it is if it starts happening to them on a daily basis. This is a DAILY experience for women. And not just in the workplace. I had my own divorce attorney proposition me right in his office. And he made me feel as if he would not do his best if I didn't give in.

And why do I feel like it will be perceived as worse for men if the harassment is done by men?

TheVoid said:

"So unfair! Soon I won't be able to lure my mathiyom students to my apartment and sleep with them"

sexual harassment (particularly in the workplace) should never be tolerated.

luv4u said:

Well it's about time men are reporting these things because I've seen plenty of sexual harrassment towards men from female superiors and co-workers. Haven't heard much about male bosses/co-workers sexually harrassing other men in the workplace, but I'm sure it happens just as much as with females. I've even heard stories where female superiors/co-workers invite male employees into the stairwell at lunchtime for "something special". And IF they get rejected, then its hell to pay.

I find it interesting that mot of ya brought up women being the agressors here, but the example in the first post was about a man being harrassed by his male boss and the article states that's the case most of the time.

Regardless, as others have said, it's all wrong.

missfee said:

For me, it's only harassment if I find the woman unattractive.

CarrieMpls said:

It's been my experience this is the case most of the time, men sexually harrassing men..

noimageatall said:

I think you're totally correct on all of this. If conventional wisdom is correct that men are typically the aggressors against both male and female employees, I also wonder if the seriousness of it against women will be obscured in some fixation on the egregiousness of homosexuality. That is, I wonder if the assumption will be male-on-male harrassment is somehow worse because... oh... it's "unnatural" or some such silliness. And that male-on-female harrassment, while it might be an issue of poor decorum, at least isn't some crime against nature.

Certain folk are masters of red herrings, and unfortunately a lot of people routinely show themselves stupid enough to be duped.
[Edited 3/5/10 7:40am]

Lammastide said:

That is exactly what I was thinking, Lama...male on male harassment will automatically be viewed as worse and there will be tons of press and articles about it. Oh...the horror!! A man touched me!!!!

While women have been living with this for ages and it still goes on. It's pretty much 'expected' that it will happen to a female sooner or later.

male on male harassment is not necessarily worse than male on female harassment but I think the ability to prove the harassment occurred and the courage to bring forth a complaint is more difficult for men. there will always be people who think that guy on guy is worse because of the homo factor just as there will always be people who think girl on guy is impossible because women supposedly have no power and that guy on girl is not that bad because women supposedly either exaggerate the offense or ultimately give in. not much you can do about it and that's why oppressors continue to oppress. public opinion tends to weigh in their favor.

luv4u said:

what a stunningly ignorant remark! congrats!

the guy i'm seeing right now actually had to have a woman fired because of sexual harassment. he still feels kinda guilty & weird about it, but as far as i'm concerned it should go both ways.

evenstar3 said:

Thank you!

sammij said:

i mean, it is 2010, right?

We're in good hands.

Fauxie said:

good, unbiased hands.

oh wait.

BklynBabe said:

.....that is until a man makes the mistake of touching the teabags of Jeremy Shockey OR Tim Hardaway.

DesireeNevermind said:

Co-sign.

the one thing to keep in mind is that with male on male harassment claims, homophobia might play into the allegations...however, this should never be used as justification for harassment.

sosgemini said:

I totally agree with this.

WOmen say and do much worse than men in the workplace. But a man will likely overreact to a comment by another man even if the comment wasn't even remotely intended to be sexual in nature.

A simple, "you smell good" if the guy is wearing cologne can instantly become, "dude, he made a pass at me, that buttfucker."


We had a situation at work were one of our homophobic colleagues claimed (I'll call him Ben) said something suggestive to him. "dude, Ben totally...." this guy went on and on.

I finally had to say, "dude, ben is a good looking young guy. He's in a stable relationship, and aren't you going through a divorce? And besides, Ben can have any gay man that he wants... Why (and really really think about this) would he make a pass at you and ruin his career?).

... 5 second pause


Me: "He wouldn't."

At this point the rest of the workers (all liberal but one) chimed in and pointed out the absurdity of the comment. The co-worker wasn't able to tell us the exact words either. In the end, it was some guy just talking shit to discredit homosexuals in general.



I personally think far more women harass men (and is never reported) than gay men harassing other men---it's too risky, and gay men know that.

TheVoid said:

this also potentially falls under sexual harassment statute in that it could have created a hostile work environment. If ben had heard such comments he might have felt harassed and uncomfortable. sexual harassment isn't just about one person trying to force another into performing sexual favors. it also covers offensive commentary/jokes of a sexual nature and third parties feeling uncomfortable by a persons acts or statements (the people dude told the ben story to).

My boss is female, and I've posted about how unprofessional she is. Never went as far as sexual harassment...however, I know way too much about her personal life...she has conversations with other females within earshot of me.

She's had a hysterectemy....she doesn't wear panties once she gets home....

I mean, this is bullshit.

Revolution said:

What's wrong with someone sharing that info?